Lonely
by Jamie Lane
Summary: How much can change in 2 years time? Clark Kent has gone without a final good bye. Lois Lane loses her job and her home. Martha Kent is more mysterious than ever. Can they find their way back to each other? They are lonely, but never truely alone.
1. Weak

**Lonely**

Chapter 1: Weak

It had been two years. Two years since he left without a word. Two years since he showed up on her doorstep, upset and shaking, only to find her kissing Oliver. The last thing he said to her was, "I'm sorry if I'm interrupting. I just came to look for a friend." He paused. "I guess I was mistaken." He gave her a broken look. "I'll just go."

She didn't want to believe it had been two long years. Everyday since then she made the same trip up the wooden stairs to his sanctuary, hoping that she would reach the top and see him standing there, looking through his telescope or lying on the couch. That she would wake up from the nightmare and realize that he was still there. But all she could do is hope.

Her feet felt as heavy as the day before, just as they would tomorrow. Each stair becoming harder to climb than the last. Each breath stifled the closer she was to the top. And so the pain continued as she forced herself up those stairs, until finally...the last stair. She turned slowly and closed her eyes. She knew he wouldn't be there; he was never there. Her hazel eyes crept open, peering out, hoping for once that she was wrong. Realizing she was still holding her breath, she let it out; he had to be out there, somewhere.

She walked the familiar path and fell into the same spot on the couch as she always did. The same spot she sat in when she first went there. It was the first time he had opened up to her and she remembered it vividly. She placed her head on the arm of the couch and looked out into the sky. She looked at the same star she did every night, waiting for his return. She spoke to it as though he was there, on that distant star, listening to her every word. She smiled. He would laugh at her for thinking that.

"Hey Smallville. It's me, Lois, as it is every night. Ya know I'm going to have to smack you when you get back, you've made me into an emotional nut case." Her eyes began to glisten. "God Smallville, where are you? I'm so sick of waiting for you to come home. I'm so sick of searching for you and only coming to another dead end." She sniffed still trying to fight back the tears. "Everyone misses you so much! We just..." A tear fell and she caught it with the tip of her finger. "Damn it. I promised myself I wouldn't cry. But yet every time I come up here, I do. You wanna know why Smallville?" She waited as if he would answer.

After a few seconds she continued, unnerved. "Because this house is so quite without you. Your mom's a wreck. She barely talks to anyone anymore. When she does talk, it's only about you and then she cries. I've never seen your Mom cry so much. And Chloe? She's not her usual self anymore. She's not as nosey as she used to be and she pulls away any time someone mentions something about you. And me?" Her voice started to sound angry but then paused. "I really don't know what to think." She looked down at her hands as they began to shake from the cool breeze coming through the loft. "I do know this though: I hate you not being around. I mean, there is no one to argue with, no one to make fun of and know I'm only joking. I'm going to find you Clark. I just have to."

She stood and began her journey back down the stairs toward the exit. She planned go to his room, put on one of his flannel shirts and sleep snuggled up with his pillows. She turned around one more time and looked up at the star, "If only you could hear me." Another tear fell to be quickly wiped away.

Only ten miles away, a doorknob to a solid green room began to move. He looked up slightly, unable to muster the strength to fully lift his head. Focusing on other things, he knew who wouldbe on the other side. Listening to her heart beat, he had heard every word she said. Every night he would listen. Listen as if it was the last thing he would ever hear. The door opened and he snapped out of his trance with the familiar clicking of those stilettos coming across the green laminated floor towards him.

She put a finger under his chin and looked into his sunken eyes. They held open long enough to see her, just enough to remember why he was still there. He turned his head away in disgust, the green shackles on his weakened arms and legs shaking. She removed the finger with tears in her eyes, jumping slightly as she finally noticed the other person in the room.

"Lex, I was just checking on him." Her voice shaking as she looked down at the floor.

"Lana how thoughtful of you. But unfortunately, Clark here doesn't need your help." He smirked at the figure before him. "He is a threat to man kind Lana. He doesn't need help from anyone." He took another step forward only to feel a hand grab onto his arm.

"Lex, how much longer to you plan to keep him here? He never hurt anyone. I may have been angry with him when he left me, but even he doesn't deserve this. It isn't right Lex." It wasn't the first time they have had this argument.

Lex looked down as her as a grin appeared across his face. Grabbing her hand on his arm with such force she let out a small whimper. "Oh, Lana. How can you be so blind? So what if he hasn't tried to hurt anyone. He will." He let go of her hand and stepped toward Clark, grabbing his face and forcing him to look into his eyes. "That's why he will never be free. Because he doesn't deserve it." He looked at Clark, "Do you Clark?"

Lex let go of his face and Clark lowered his head. Punching him in the stomach causing Clark to wince, Lex moved to leave. He paused at the doorway and turned his head toward Lana. "And if you decide to set him free or tell any of his friends where he is..." he looked directly into her eyes, "You'll be next. And you'll be dead. You understand me?" Lana looked over and frantically shook her head.

With Lex gone, Lana paused for a moment at the door and looked back at Clark, knowing for the first time in her life that this time, Clark Kent wasn't going to win.


	2. Discovering

Chapter 2: Discovering

Still wide awake and it is 7:30 in the morning, Lois gets up to endure another day. She walks down to the kitchen and it's quiet. There are no pans popping with bacon inside, no coffee being made or toast inside the toaster. It's just quiet and it's been that way for 2 years. Martha Kent doesn't cook anymore, not breakfast, not lunch and not dinner. She works, comes home, showers and sleeps. It is a daily routine now. I don't bother asking why because she probably won't answer. The only time I hear anything from her is when she is in her room and the only thing she does hear is crying. Crying from a desperate woman in need, one that no one can help. It hurts to know that she was once so strong, she is not that strong woman anymore.

She looks into the living room and sees the familiar couch where she used to look and find Clark asleep. She smiles to herself, still proud to admit she kicked him out of his own bed. Laying down in the same position he used to: on his stomach and face under his arm, she remembers every little detail because she misses them so much. She never really thought she paid this much attention to him but obviously she did. She never thought she could miss someone this much let alone Smallville. 'Lane you need to start using you brain more often.' Her eyes slowly closed and she began to sleep for the first time in days.

Instead of being thrown into a dream she was thrown into her memories from last night. After leaving the loft she went straight into Clark's room, straight into Clark's closet. She was digging through it blindly, not knowing exactly what she was looking for. She did know that she wanted something, possibly anything to give her insight into the mysterious Clark Kent. Something that might help her figure out why he left all the people that loved him behind.

Several boxes and articles of clothing later she hadn't found anything, not even a piece of paper worth reading. She did find some ripped up pictures of Lana though. 'Got to burn those later.' She stuck them in her back pocket.

Disappointed yet again with Clark's secrecy she started to put everything back. While put the shirts back on hangers she noticed one lying on the closet floor. She picked it up only to find a metal lock underneath. She looked at it, 'Curious', she thought, 'Hiding something are we Smallville?'

She had tried every key in the house, several hair pins and she even jumped on it a few times. "This sucker won't budge." Piqued, she sat down and weighed her options. 'Destroy the lock-Respect Clark's privacy'. If he never came back what would he care. But if he did but she had to help him it could help. "It's going to open." She said as if it was a password or something.

She ended up: taking a lighter to it, 'What's the use Lane? This is dumb!', hitting it with a crowbar and smashing it with a sledgehammer before it finally broke loose. True she couldn't put it pack on and lock it again but she could open the door it was guarding. She lifter it slowly, expecting porn to pop out. She laughed to herself as she remembered, 'This is Smallville, not your average teenage boy.'

With the door out of the way she grabbed for a flashlight and found only two items inside: a bracelet and the journal she had given him for his birthday. She smiled happily, "Ha! I knew Clark would like it! In your face Chloe!" When she opened the book she found every page but the last filled. And as she read each page she found things words that had her baffled. Like Kryptonite. She looked at it twice, "What the hell?"

Everything he had written was so discreet until she reached the last three pages. They were sloppy but she could still read them. 'Today went nothing like I had hoped. But I don't know what to expect because nothing ever does. I woke this morning to find a note from mom saying she was out with Lionel again. I hate that she is with him. He is dangerous and no matter what I do I can't make her see that. She knows that he knows my secret but she swears that he would never use it against me. My secret has become a burden. The only people who know are Chloe and my mom. But they still don't understand me or what I am going through. I hate not being able to tell people, especially Lois."

'Me? What?' "I want to tell her so badly. She is always the one who pulls me back from the edge, and she expects nothing in return. How could I ask for a better friend? She always helps me and she pushes me to believe in myself no matter what. If she knew my real problems she could help me through so much." Turns the page. "But I couldn't put her in danger. If she knew then there is a good chance she could die. But I know Lois, she can protect herself, I shouldn't have to worry but I do. If she did die I don't know how I would survive and I just couldn't live with that on my conscience. I trust her so much, but yet I can't tell her about the biggest part of my life. I'm a living breathing oxymoron. There's also a slim chance that she won't accept me, that she'll just call me a freak and never talk to me again. But I don't believe that. She would never do that to me, she cares too much about me to do that. Back to my day. I saw Lana today. I didn't talk to her but she did have time to give me the nastiest look that she could muster up. I don't have to ask why. She hates me, I know that. It's just so hard to believe that we aren't even friends anymore. But after she started talking to Lex everything that we were dissipated. It's funny, the only thing I wanted to do while we were together was tell her my secret and now I'm glad that I didn't. If she knew we'd still be together, I think I like being free a lot more. Afterwards I ended up at the Daily Planet attempting to talk to Chloe, well as Lois would call it brood some more. But it turns out she had went on a date with Jimmy. I like Jimmy I really do but it's just so hard sharing my best friend with him and knowing that I can't completely tell her everything with him around. He calls me C.K. It is kinda weird having him call me that, I'm kinda used to being called Smallville. I actually like the nickname but I'll never tell Lois that, she would have a field day."

'He likes it?' tears beginning to show, 'Wow.' She turns to the last written on page. "And then I stopped by the Talon to tell my mom bye before I headed home. I never cease to amaze myself. Right as soon as I am pulled out and am going down the road 5 miles from my house, my truck flips. I still don't know why. I was thrown from the cab and landed smack dab in the middle of a huge field of Kryptonite. God it hurt. I felt so lifeless, helpless even but still I was in so much pain. I still have a piece in my shoulder, it's making it really hard to write." By this point Lois is balling, she can't hold it in anymore. 'He got hurt? Oh God what if he is dead. No...no Lois you can't think that. You can't.' "I only hope I can get it out before it kills me. Before I made it here, I crawled to the Talon and I made my way up to Lois's apartment. Hoping that she was there and that she was alone so she could help me. I was and still am shaking, and I was crying so hard because of the pain. I opened her door almost falling when I saw her in Oliver's lap. I just left. I felt so useless. Why did I go there? She doesn't care about me. Possibly because I care about her and that would have been my chance to finally tell her my secret, to finally let Lois in. But I can't. I can't seem to let anyone in, all I do is hurt them and it has to stop. I'm going up to the Fortress, I only hope Jor-el can help me. Maybe if I finally give in to his demands he won't kill anyone else I love. I've got to keep Lois out of danger."

She dropped the book and her head fell to the ground. 'He loved me?' Clark Kent loved her and she was to busy with Oliver to realize it. Maybe that's why she left him the day she found out Clark was gone, she no longer knew. She was lost, 'Clark...' Was the last thing she said as she cried herself to sleep, bracelet glowing in her hand.

He could hear her heart beating...faster and then slower again. All the lights were out in the room but his shackles held tight to his hands and feet. He finds no way to sleep now, it's useless. He has nothing to rest for, it's too painful. The door clicks again quietly and he barely see the long hair that flows down her neck. She turns on the flashlight near his face, she has food and a wash cloth in her hands. He can only look up and smile, well try to smile. She really did want to take care of him, she really wanted Lex to let him go. But he didn't want her help. He only smiled because of the nourishment, not the caregiver.

"Clark are you okay? I mean do you think you can eat?" She looked at him warily. She knew he hasn't eaten in months; they starve him to test the limits of what his alien body can do or do without.

"I...can..." He managed to get out. She held to the food to his mouth, and he ate it greedily. When it was gone and he was still left with an empty feeling she had nothing for him. But she was persistent and began to rub the wash cloth over his body.

"You don't smell but you are dirty." She dipped the cloth back into the basin and wiped his face. He could now tell temperatures better, he was losing all of his abilities.

Despite it all there was only one thing he could ask, "Lois? Lois ok?"

And Lana smiled, that was the only thing he ever said when she visited. She knew he could never love her after she tricked him into coming there in the first place. She tried to seduce him only to get him trapped and she knew how wrong she was now. "I'm going to go see Lois tomorrow Clark. I'll tell her you're here and she'll get you out. I promise."

Clark looked up. Suddenly with new found happiness, but as soon as it came it was lost. He looked at her with guilt ridden eyes, "Lois. No. Danger. No. Please." He begged with everything he could. He didn't want her to die because of him. He loved her to much. Clark Kent loved her. The words repeated in his head, he wanted to see her but if it meant for the last time, he would want to death it in his last seconds, so he wouldn't burden her forever. And for the first time in those 2 years, he cried not out of pain but from his broken heart. Lana left him be knowing what she had to do no matter the cost. She loved him not Lex. But two can play the same game.

Lois awoke in a cold sweat, screaming Clark's name. 'He loves me.' Was here only thought as she had the same nightmare she had every week. That Clark was locked away at the Luthor Mansion in a green room and it was all her fault. That since she pushed him away he ran to Lana and she trapped him there forever.


	3. Fight for Freedom

Chapter 3: Fight For Freedom

He rolled over to find his bed empty of the occupant from the night before. He knew where she went. She goes there every other month. He also knew that he could listen to every word said inside, but this time he chose not to. Not only would he be invading her privacy, he still kinda respected her, but he knew he could find out on his own.

Rising from the satin sheets he begins the journey down the hall. He watches from a corner as she steps out of the room, carefully locking it back, trying desperately not to make a sound. Lana turned around only to run smack head first into Lex who had an evil smile on his face.

"Lana, what were you doing in there?" He asked already knoing the answer.

She looked up at him, anger filling her heart. "I was trying to keep him alive. Atleast I have some compassion for him, enough to bring him some food and wash him off a bit. Remember? You said I could do that every other month, just enough to keep him alive. You son of a b&h. Do you not have a heart anymore? What happend to the man I fell in love with? What happend to him?" She screamed, faking her tears. She didn't think she ever had loved him but she knew that would pull at him some. She looked into his cold eyes and didn't wait for an answer. She walk around the same corner in which he came from, 'I have some major planning to do.'

She picked up her cell phone and for the first time in months she dialed that number. The one that could turn everything around. "Yeah this is Lana. I'm sorry I know it's late but I really need to talk to you. It's about Clark. I...I found him." Click.

Lois sat there in a puddle of her own tears, just starring at that book, just starring. She had no words, she didn't know what to think. Clark loved her and he was still some where out in the world, possibly lost, possibly kid napped, possibly...dead. She didn't want to believe it. She had never heard of that Fortress or of Jor-el in which he spoke of. She just hoped that he had made it there in one piece and that he was safe and happy. She could only hope.

She stood and walked down those steps and out to the loft. She went there every night at this time, 7:03 P.M. It was the time she had found out that he was gone, the time she realized that she would be spending the rest of her life miserable until she found him. Her feet still heavy like the day before as she ascended to the top. She sat down on the couch and looked up into the sky and she began her prayers about the only person she ever thought about anymore: Clark.

"Hey Smallville, I'm back again! Here to annoy you." She looked at the floor, she hoped that she didn't annoy him.

10 miles away in that same green room his head began to raise, his ears began to focus, she was talking to him again. That was the only thing that made him happy was listening to her voice and her steady heart beat. Just knowing that the person he loved was ok made him live just a bit longer. "Lois."

She looked back up to the star; it was still glowing as bright as ever. She always believed that as long as that star glowed he was alive. "I found your journal today and this bracelet." She started to fiddle with it on her wrist it was still glowing. "I don't know why this thing is glowing but I do know that I love it, it's really beautiful." She smiled watching the metal reflect the light from the moon onto the floor. "I wonder who you were keeping it for. I only assume that it was for someone special being as it's so beautiful. It looks expensive Smallville, where'd you get the green?" She laughed, she knew he had found away to get this within the law, he was a boy scout of course.

His eyes started darting back and forth. "She found it. The journal. No." He never intended for anyone to find that. That was the place he went to when there was no one else around, when he felt like he couldn't turn to anyone. But then it clicked in his mind. If anyone should have found it, it was Lois she deserved to read it more than anyone. He began to smile as he continued to listen.

"Who's Jor-el? I read the name several times and yet I don't remember you ever mentioning Jor-el to me, or anyone for that matter. Maybe it is apart of this secret that you have that you can't tell me about. The one that you came to tell me when you were hurt." Tears began to form, she knew she wouldn't be able to get through the night without them. "Clark I'm so sorry, I never meant to push you away. I never meant to hurt you. Every night since then I've had this nightmare about you that I just can't shake. And every night it becomes more vivid and haunting. You're locked in this small green room in Luthor Mansion, shackles around your arms and feet. Your so bony Smallville, like you haven't ate in years." She sniffs, her face soaking wet, her entire body shaking. "You keep saying, 'Lana tricked me. Lana tricked me.' And you look at me with your eyes all sunk in your eye and you are pleading to me, 'Lois please save me.' And I can't because every time I come near you the room stretches and you are pulled away from me. I can't get to you Clark. I need to get to you." And she stops to take a breath as the hot tears continue to travel down her face.

Clark starts to panic. "She knows where I am. Oh God." That is the only thing he could think to say. And he kept saying it over and over and over. He pulled tireless at the shackles but they wouldn't budge. He knew screaming wouldn't be any good, this was a sound proof room, no one could hear him. He gave one last tug and a burning sensation shot threw his back, and his eyes began to glow a bright color of red. He blinked and he looked around, he was home.

He tried to take a step forward but he wouldn't budge. He looked down at his hands, they weren't his own. He saw the bracelet on his arm and he knew he was seeing through Lois's eyes. He looked into the bracelet and instead of a blue gem in the center he saw a red one with his own reflection starring back. Lois was reading his journal and she kept repeating over and over again, "Clark Kent loves me." He could feel the smile on her face. And just as soon as it had happened he had returned to his green room with the burning sensation no longer there. He looked around frantically, he had to get out. He had to see Lois; he had to be with her. He loved her, he had to get out because he loved her.

"Yes I know this is Lana, what do you want? It's 12 A.M." Mrs. Kent said with a yawn. And as quickly as it came she jumped out of the bed. "Clark? Oh God! I'm on my way...wait where will we meet? Is the Talon ok? Lana? Lana?" And the phone went dead. She ran out the front door and hopped in the car. She drove like a maniac the entire way there. Only thinking about her son, the only thing that she did seem to think about anymore. Coming to a screeching halt in front of the Talon doors, Lana jumped in the passenger's side and said only this, "Drive Mrs. Kent, drive."

The gun was cocked, fully loaded. 6 rounds in the chamber, read for the kill. He danced his finger across the trigger, not knowing whether to pull it or put it away. He just held it there to the young mans shaking face. He knew he wasn't shaking from fear but from lack of nutrition. He wanted this to end in the corner of his mind, but yet the most upfront part told him, 'You can't let him go Lex. He would kill us all. Look at him, he might be weak now but if you set him free how long until he recovers and seeks revenge? How long Lex? You can't listen to Lana any more...you have no heart.' "I have no heart." 'Yes that's right Lex. Not heart at all.'

He held the gun right to Clark's temple, a point at which no one could survive. "Should I do this Clark? Huh? Should I just put you out of your misery or should I make you suffer just a bit longer?" He played with the safety on the gun, switching it to ready. An evil grin came across his face as a flicker in Clark's eyes begged him for the sweet release. Lex was not one to kill, without a lot of pain and suffering first. "Okay, Clark. I'll give you what you so desperately want." He quickly raised the gun and pointed it at the palms of Clark's hands. He emptied the revolver as the muffled screams echoed throughout. He only laughed as the tears began to fall and as the blood began to trickle. He lifted Clark's chin and looked into his eyes, "You'll never win this, Kent. Never."

Lex walked away from the room as Clark writhed in pain. He couldn't bend his arms down to pull the 3 rounds out from each hand, he couldn't move. He couldn't stop the bleeding, he couldn't scream for help, nothing. Nothing but anger and tears. He just stood there accepting his sealed fate, Lois would never find him and everyone he loved would live the rest of their lives wondering, "Where did he go?"

And Lois sat there starring at the stars. The one she would always looked to began to flicker and she knew that he was losing his battle. She said the only thing that could keep her from breaking, the only thing she had wanted to say for so long to him. She had only hoped it would be to his face. "I love you Clark until the day I die. No man has ever or will ever make me happier than you. You are everything I want and everything I need. I wouldn't admit it before but I will now. I loved you from day one: when I found you stark naked, struck by lightning in that corn field. I'm going to save you, don't lose hope in me Smallville, please just don't lose hope."

He smiled, the pain started to subside, and the blood stopped oozing down his arms. Just her prayers made him stronger and he slowly began to heal.


	4. Finding What's Lost

Chapter 4: Finding What's Lost

They pulled off the road at a place in the middle of nowhere...in the middle of nowhere.

"How do you know where Clark is? Where is he Lana? Is he alive, please God let him be alive." Martha was crying, she couldn't keep her thoughts in anymore. She hadn't seen her son in 2 years and she wanted answers now.

Lana looked at her and she was scared. She had a right to be scared. She looked at her and she let out a shaky breath. "Mrs. Kent I've known where Clark has been for the last 2 years." She watched Martha's face turn from worry to anger. "I'm actually the one who got him put there." She watched her intently, hoping and praying that she wouldn't strangle her for what she was about to say. "2 years ago I noticed Clark walk into the Talon to talk to you. When he got inside, I snuck under his truck and put in a handy-mans hydraulics, these were super spring loaded so when I pressed a button presto! The truck would flip. I know about Clark's abilities, I've known about them since the day he saved Lex when he was kidnapped. When Clark got back in his truck to leave, I followed him and when he got near that field full of meteor rock that Lex planted I pressed and button and sent Clark flying. He fell right into it but he still managed to crawl out. He still managed to crawl up to Lois's apartment and then crawl back home. He went in the house for about 20 minutes and came back out barely standing. I walked up to him and told him everything would be ok, that I would save him." She looked down at the floor board, unable to handle the deadly gaze Martha Kent was giving her. She slowly drew in another breath and released it with her last words, "I seduced him into the Mansion. He's been locked in there and tortured by Lex for 2 long years."

Martha turned again facing the windshield unable to look at the pathetic piece of life that sat beside her. How could she keep this kind of information from her, Lois or Chloe for all these years? How could she do that to them. She turned back to face her and her head was pointed down. "Look at me Lana." And Lana looked up immediately with fear and guilt clearly expressed on her face. Martha grabbed her face and forced her to keep eye contact. "I don't know your reasons, I don't care. I want my son back." Lana just stared at her as Martha's anger rose. "GIVE ME MY SON BACK!"

Lex walked into the green room to check on his prisoner, to see if anymore damage could be done. He had no guilt about shoot him, he only had guilt that he couldn't kill him yet. He walked over slowly, admiring the wholes in his hands, the scars on his once chiseled stomach and the bones sticking out through his chest. The bruises that covered his body from being beaten on that night when they captured him. He remembered that fight, he had a scars on the back of his head from it and every time he gets angry it rips open again and bleeds. Only a small amount of pay back compared to what he was doing to the alien before him. And as he continued to walk towards the battered body he noticed that it hadn't acknowledged his existence in the room, which angered him. He grabbed him by his hair and pulled his face up only to jump back in surprise; his eyes were glowing red, something he had never seen before.

He reached up his hand to the crimson sockets and placed his finger near the lids. As soon as his skin came in contact it immediately burned. He could hear it sizzle as he staggered backwards. He looked at the bubbling skin shocked, not knowing Clark had that power. But Clark on the other hand couldn't feel his presence, he couldn't he him cursing towards him, all he could see was a blinding white light and a hand holding on to him for dear life.

He looked down at the person to which the hand belonged and he said nothing. He reached down and lifted the hand to his face, loving the feeling of her skin on his. This is what he had missed so much, just the simple pleasures that he had taken for granted. And that look in her eyes sent chills coursing through him and his knees almost gave way. She reached out with her other hand and grabbed his face, pulling herself into the most passionate kiss of herself. She struggled for breath and control, neither of which she seemed to have. Every time she saw him in her dreams he took her breath away and made her want to lose all control. They kissed like there was no tomorrow, hoping that this wasn't a dream and that it was real.

Clark broke the kiss just to stare into her hazel eyes, her perfect hazel eyes. And she looked back at him with such love and passion and desire that he wanted to just take her but in some part of his mind he knew that this wasn't real and he was only dreaming. He was only dreaming.

"Lois." Was all he managed to say before he pulled her into a hug. He smiled and shed every thought of her not loving him, every thought that he was in pain. He smelled her hair and there was nothing. This really was a dream and he broke the hug only to see her start to cry. "No...please, please don't cry Lois." He begged.

She sniffed and looked up at him, "I know I'm only dreaming, I know this isn't real. I can't find you Clark, I can't find you." She looked into his eyes and she saw the same worry reflected back. She put her head on his shoulder and whispered, "Why won't you let me find you?"

Taken back he moved her head back into view and just looked at her. What could he say? What could tell her that this wasn't a dream, that this was really him and not some fantasy. "Lois I need you to listen to me. You are not dreaming." She laughed.

"Clark don't lie to me. I just want you to be with me in this dream don't lie." She looked at him with pleading eyes.

He knew that if he didn't convince her of otherwise she would never see him again he knew he was on the brink of existence and there wasn't much holding him back. He grabbed her shoulders, "Lois I'm not lying to you. I'm really here and you are really here. Well spiritually at least." She looked at him blankly. She looked around at the clouds that surrounded them and the white light just behind him. She wanted to believe him so badly but she knew in her heart that this was just another figment of her imagination, that he could never speak to her like this. He saw the doubt in her eyes, "Lois please believe me. I just need you to believe me. You wanna know why?" She looked up at him expecting him to just disappear and her to wake up screaming his name. "Because I haven't lost my hope yet that you will find me and save me."

But when she didn't wake she knew this was real. And she grabbed on to him for dear life. She wrapped her arms around his neck and just held him there. She listened to his slow and steady heartbeat and she became calm. "Oh God Smallville! I thought I was never going to see you again. I missed you so much...and if you ever leave me like that again I swear if I find you I kick your ass." She looked up at him and she was glowing, she believed him.

"Lois you've got to find me, you gotta save me I'm dieing." He started to cry. He never imagined telling the woman he loved that either she risking her life or he lost his. He was ashamed of it somewhere in his mind but before him the woman he loves proved to him every second of the day that you have to put faith in the hard decisions.

"Clark where are you?"

"Luthor Mansion."

"What the...Luthor Mansion? You mean..." Her face started turning red and the rage was evident in her voice. "You mean to tell me that little pink f&kin princess and Mr. I've got money coming out my $$ have you? How Clark?"

"I can't explain that now Lois. I just need you to save me. I've never asked you to help me before and I never thought I would." He looked at her and cupped her face. "But being in that room trapped for so long I've realized that I will only ask you for two things."

She looked at him with a mischievous look in her eye. "Thinking dirty are we Smallville."

He just smiled, this is why he loves her so much. No matter what the situation she can always find the right words to pull him through to make everything seem okay. "No Lois. Can you save me?" She shook her head and he began to turn, walking back towards the light.

"Wait Clark!" And he turned. "What was the other thing you wanted to ask of me?"

He walked back over to her and crashed his lips upon hers, igniting the flames that they had snuffed for so long. He looked into her eyes, making her want to melt as their lips never parted. "Will you love me with all your heart?" And then he turned and he was gone.

And with a snap Clark's eyes went from red back to normal and he gasped for air. Lex cautiously made his way towards him as he snapped out of his trance. "So where have you been Clark? You've been out of it for a good 20 minutes." He looked at him trying to read his face but he was giving nothing away. Lex grabbed the basin of ice he had used on his hand and threw it at him smashing it against Clark's face. He screamed out in pain feeling the glass break into his bones. The ice trailing its way down his body dripping from his bare feet, some collecting on the rags hanging over his mid section. And he was still screaming in pain. Lex walked from side to side in front of him, examining the broken creature that has hung from his walls since November 18, 2006 at 7:03 P.M. He had pocked and prodded away at his alien tissue so many times between then and now. At the beginning Lana used to stand and watch, sometimes laughing, sometimes assisting, sometimes cutting him apart. A wicked smile spread across his face at the memories as she walked out of the room, frustrated and tired.

Lois lay in a cold sweat yet again on Clark's bed, in Clark's shirt, snuggled up to Clark's pillows. She knew where to find him and this time it wasn't a dream. She sat there and contemplated her memories. "Oh God. That green room...it's real."

She jumped from the bed pulling on some clothes when she heard Mrs. Kent's car pull up. She ran out the front door to greet her and tell her everything when she saw the angry look on her face. In her hand she had the arm of Lana Lang, who looked horrified. Lois's face went from happy to pure blinding rage as she reached her arm back and slugged her as hard as she could. She put her boot on her throat and slowly bent down to her face. "You will pay for what you did to him, you lying.." Kick. "Two faced.." Kick. "Bitch from hell!" authors note..i like not beeping it out...sorry..just this once And she began kicking her until she was sure she heard a bone or two crack. She put her hand around her throat and Mrs. Kent grabbed Lois's arm.

"Lois how did you know that she knew about Clark?" And Lois looked up and explained everything. Everything except the whole looking up to the stars, kissing him, reading his journal thing. And when she was done Martha looked in awe at her. Lois was crying, she just couldn't hold herself back anymore. "Ok. So we need a plan. We need a plan."

Lois smiled through her tears, "I know just the person to call." She flipped open her cell phone and dialed a number incredibly fast. "Yeah Chloe, we've got a problem. Care to help?" She looked up at Martha with a wink and a bright smile on her face. Her son would be freed, she knew it.

3 hours, 2 trips to Wal-mart, Goody's and K-mart later they were set. Dressed in full black attire, hand guns and shot guns in hand, black paint on their faces, they looked...ridiculous. "Chloe are you sure we should wear all of this? I mean seriously." Lois complained.

"If you want to get this done right and try to go unseen then yes. Wait a minute what did you do with Lana?"

Lois smiled. "Oh, just threw her off the truck on the way back...no biggie." She laughed to herself, giving Martha a look of accomplishment. Martha had driven while Lois threw her overboard. They seriously thought they heard her arm break when she hit the ground but they didn't care.

"Ok. I've got my laptop ready. Before we enter the house and go through with our plan I have to get this hooked up to the power system and shut it off. That way we can get through unseen and if you all be quite, unheard." She looked at Lois warily and Mrs. Kent snickered.

"All right, all right let's just go already!" Mrs. Kent complained. Both Lois and Chloe looked at her funny, she was acting like a teenager. But they dismissed the thought and hopped in, ready for the battle of a life time.

½ a mile away from Luthor Mansion they hopped out of the cab and began to run towards the entrance. They stopped abruptly after Chloe smacked Lois in the back of the head, reminding her to not be rash and let her shut off the power. Within a few seconds all lights went out. Mission go.

They had no real plan, they just knew where the room was based on Lois's description. Each one of them had 2 guns and 2 boxes full of bullets and a mission. Chloe was to distract Lex, Martha to distract the guards and Lois had to get to that green room. And so they ran, ran to their destinations, no walkie-talkie nothing but a plan.

As soon as they entered the house Chloe took off running like a wild woman, she didn't know where Lex stayed and she didn't know how to stop him but she would try anything at this point to get her best friend back. Martha turned slowly and saw security coming at a fast rate and Lois looked at her worried. Martha signaled for her to run and she did, looking over her shoulder the entire time.

Chloe had made it to Lex's room and he was still asleep in the bed. He didn't even flinch when she opened the door but he did manage to get out, "Clark will die." Before rolling over again. She gritted her teeth, it was all she could do to keep herself from breaking out the guns and blowing him to shreds.

Martha Kent was down stairs running like her life depended on it. She knew she had to so Lois would have enough time to find her son, her only will to keep running.

Lois was running down the halls as fast as she could kicking open every door and yelling in frustration when it wasn't the right one. She had to find him fast, she didn't know how much time he had left.

Lex rolled over again, wide awake to Chloe standing over him gun in his face. "Chloe...woah. Take it easy." He said raising his hands in surprise. Slowly creeping out of the bed, gun still pointed at his temple.

"Shut up Luthor. I don't want to hear it." She said angrily. She didn't care what he had to say but she had to keep calm.

He smirked. "I see you found out that Clark was here. Hmm. Interesting. And how did you come across such dangerous information?" He said side stepping the gun only to have it pressed against the same place.

"That doesn't matter. What matters is that Clark will be free again, and you Mr. Luthor, you are going down." She pulled the gun away for one second and shot at the wall. She knew that if she shot him it would be the end of her. She couldn't kill anyone let alone Lex Luthor.

The security team below became alarmed at the gun shot and they began firing their own. Lois was still running and frantically kicking open the doors, she couldn't find him she just couldn't find him. She heard the gun shot and she panicked and began breaking the doors faster. Martha on the other hand, down stairs was trapped in a corner, 7 big men surrounding her. She had no where to run, but she was a distraction, she had to keep them away from her son.

Lois kicked the last door in the hallway before another corner came into view. She kicked it with all her might and it wouldn't budge. She kicked it over and over and over. Nothing.

Chloe put the gun back to his temple only to have Lex smash it out of her hand and throw her against the ground unconscious. He ran blindly to the green room, the one that he had kept secret for so long and he knew that someone was there, he had a gut feeling about it.

She pulled out her gun and she blew the door knob to smithereens, gave it one final kick and it finally gave way. She opened the door cautiously unsure of what she might or might not find. She sidled around the door and saw the familiar green glow that had haunted her for so long. She pulled the flashlight out of her bag and nearly died at the sight before her. Clark was looking at her with his eyes sunk in his head. His skin hanging off his bones, all his muscles deteriorated. Scars all over his body, blood dripping from his pores.

The only thing he said to her nearly broke her heart, "Help me Lois. Please." She ran to him, she grabbed the hammer from her bag and began pounding away at his shackles. She pounded with all her might, all her frustration and not even a scratch. She began to cry, she couldn't save him. She loved him so much and she couldn't break him free. She had to, she can't leave him hear like this. She looked up at him and he smiled at her before shutting his eyes.

"Smallville?" She shook him. "Clark?" She put her head to his chest. "No heart beat. No. NO!!! CLARK!!! NO!!!! Please don't leave me." She wrapped her arms around his lifeless body. "I love you."

Her breath was taken away, a blue diamond shaped light came glowing out from under her black turtleneck. She pushed back her sleeve to reveal the bracelet below. She looked at it in awe, wondering why it was glowing again. With her head still on his chest she began to hear his heart beat again. She screamed, thanking God for bringing him back. She got the hammer out again and hit the chain. With one blow she shattered it and she moved on to the next. When his arms were free he fell forward, still unconscious and probably to tired and weak to hold himself up.

She got the chains off of his feet, and she began to cry again. She put him on her back and she hardly felt any weight. "What did they do to you Clark?" She ran him out of the room, to run smack dab into Lex. As soon as she touched him Clark's body jumped and he began to squirm trying to break free from her grip. She sat him down and he stood, she had no idea how.

"So trying to escape are we Lois? You'll never make it out alive." He smirked pulling the gun he just stole from Chloe.

"You son of a b$h!" She kicked him in the balls. He fell to the ground and he pulled the trigger.

She turned around to only see Clark's body crumpled on the floor. She bit back her rage and pulled the pistol from her bag. She held it to his face and whispered in his ear, "This is for Clark you heartless b$trd." Bam! Blood shot every where. And Lex was gone. She stood only to see Chloe, blood running down her face, with tear mixing in. She didn't bother to say anything, it wouldn't do any good. Lois had killed a man for the man she loved.

She took off running out the door, Clark back in the same position on her back. She placed him in the cab where he awoke with a wince. "Lois?" And he grabbed his shoulder. And his eyes widened in shock as he saw Chloe running for her life out of the Luthor Mansion, his mom at her side. The security team was fast on their trail, guns pulled and ready to fire. Chloe made it to the car first hopping in the drivers seat and turning the key expecting Martha to get any. But as that key was turned a shot was fired and her lifeless body hit the ground with a thud.

Lois turned and looked at Clark, and he looked like he had just lost everything. He franatically tried to get up, to run to her but Lois stopped him, she was fighting her own pain. "MOM!!! NO!!! MOM!!! Mom...no...no..." He leaned into her shoulder and dropped his head and the flood began. Lois pushed him further in and shut the door behind her, as Chloe began to pull away. She held onto him for dear life, hoping that he wouldn't be joining her anytime soon. She listening to him cry, it was the worst thing she had ever heard. There was more pain and fear in his sobs than in anything she had ever witnessed, he just lost any sense of family that he would ever have. He was an adopted child, he didn't know of his real parents, he just lost the people that he called his own. All she could do was sit there and rub his back, and stare wide-eyed at the road ahead, afraid of her next move. He was broken and she was the only one to be able to piece him back together.


	5. Hurting

Chapter 5: Hurting

It hurt her so much to watch him cry like that. To see him so broken physically and emotionally and to know that there might not be anything she could do to fix it. Chloe couldn't look at him or her, they were both a mess. She regretted leaving Mrs. Kent back there but she knew that if she had went back they would have all shared the same fate. And so she drove on listening to Clark whimper in pain and him trying to fight his tears. Every second more she could tell was breaking Lois's heart. She had such a distant look in her eyes but every time Clark moved she was brought back, checking him over with her eyes, making sure she wasn't the one that was hurting him. And you could tell that she was on the verge of tears but by being Lois she knew that crying was for the weak. Right now she had to be strong for Clark. For the first time in her life she felt vulnerable and she didn't know how to deal with it, being strong was becoming a hard thing to do.

Chloe was still angry with Lois though, she shouldn't have killed Lex like that. She didn't know if Clark would be able to handle that news. Glancing back, she didn't even know if he would come out of this the same. Would he revert back to being a child or would he be to scared to ever leave Lois's side? Only time could give them those answers.

They pulled into the driveway at the Kent farm, slowly. Clark looked up and for the first time in 2 years he became overwhelmed with a sense of relief. He was home, finally. He had never even dreamed that this day would come again. He was home and he was in Lois's arms, a comfort he had always looked forward to. He glanced upwards towards her face and he saw the vacant expression hidden in her eyes. Even though she was trying her best to just look at him and smile he could tell that she was in just as much emotional pain as him. And suddenly everything was a little more ok. Just knowing that someone understood what he was feeling felt like a burden had been lifted of his shoulders, and because it was Lois a burden had been lifted from his heart.

The car slowly came to a stop as Chloe made sure she didn't hurt Clark by jerking him all over the place. She turned and looked at him fear illuminating from her eyes as for the first time she got a good look at the damage that had been done. She winced, she couldn't grasp the idea of why some one would want to hurt him. Lex Luthor truly didn't have a heart and thanks to Lois, he didn't have that working organ either, she had made sure of that.

She stepped out of the car and took a deep breath before looking at the home they were about to enter. This was the home where she had always felt safe especially because of Mrs. Kent's warmth and how loving and open she was. She didn't know if that home was still the same as it was now that she was no longer able to come back. She feared that Clark would notice more than the rest of them.

She took in another deep breath and turned and opened the back door. Lois slowly stepped out with Clark in her arms. She looked at Chloe with tears running down her face, a look of terror in her eyes and she mouthed, "He's just so small." She pulled him up in her arms more making sure she wouldn't drop him. She choked back a sob, she had to be strong for Clark's sake, had to.

She walked into the house his limp, frail body hanging in her arms. She sat him down on the couch and kneeled down in front of him. She almost laughed at little at she noticed his... excitement, but instead just smiled. She continued looking him over, numbers racking in her head as she tried to remember what all had to be fixed or removed. Her happiness had left her the moment she looked back at that bullet hole, the bullet logged somewhere within it. They have to remove 7 bullets, 9 shards of glass, sew up 15 bleeding wounds and clean 12 infected scars. She looked to his face and noticed a look of guilt in his eyes. And as she reached up to touch that face he jerked out of habit from being beaten so many times. She pulled her hand back and saw the fear now placed in his worn green eyes. She pushed her hand up slower and cupped his cheek. Tears began to rise as she watched him wince to her touch. "What did he do to you Clark?" She continued caressing his overly defined bone with her thumb.

He turned his head away from her no wanting to answer that question. He was too afraid to answer her. Truth be told he couldn't remember half of it, most of the time he just woke up with a newly added pain. He hated that she looked at him like that, like he was a defenseless child. He never wanted to be weak in front of Lois. He had always wanted to prove to her that he was a strong man not a brooding boy. Even though he knew that she only joked about it he couldn't help but feel she was pointing out another insecurity of his, something that she always seemed to do without trying. Something Lana had always done. But Lois never condemned him for his imperfections, she tried to help him and that is why he was so much more afraid of Lois than Lana. Lois could pull him apart piece by piece because she knew how and she was the only one who really could. And she probably will once she starts trying to put him back together. As he looked down at his gapping wound, realization hit him: Lois is going to find out my secret. It didn't bother him it was a good thought. He turned back and looked at her glistening eyes and smiled. If Lois knew she could help him through this mess.

Behind those glistening eyes he saw the fear she was hiding and the pain that had been building up for all those years. He lifted his fingers with every ounce of strength he had and placed them on her hand resting beside his on the couch. She looked down shocked at hold cold his touch was. She looked back when he began to speak, "It's ok Lois. Don't be scared." He swallowed, "I'll be alright. So will you."

She intertwined her fingers in his and all her haunting visions disappeared. "Yeah." She said watching him become a little more at ease.

Chloe had returned from the kitchen and stopped in the doorway as she watched Lois glow for the first time in 2 years. She smiled, only Clark could make her this happy. Only Clark made Lois's smile brighter than anything else. She sighed and continued on in the room. She sat everything down on the coffee table and Lois never once took her hand away from Clark's.

"So...um...Lois..." Chloe grabbed the knife with a shaky hand. "What do we have to do?" She sat the blade down beside a towel in a pan noticing Clark struggling to get away.

Lois placed a hand on his arm and he instantly became calmer. She drew a breath and released it. "We have to get out 7 bullets, 3 in each hand and 1 in his right shoulder." She looked at him then bowed her head trying not to cry. "Then we've got to get 9 shards of glass out of his face." He looked away. He didn't want to hear this, he had already lived it once. And ever time Lois listed another thing memories danced around in his head of all the pain he had experienced over those 2 years. His shut his eyes tight trying to run the out of his thoughts. Lois noticed but there was nothing she could do. If she squeezed his hand she could hurt him, even the arm she was rubbing looked to frail to put any pressure on. She looked back at Chloe who was still laying the instruments need that she had just cleaned on the pan. "We have to sew up 15 cuts and clean 12 infected ones. This isn't going to be easy Chloe."

"Yeah I know Lois but if we don't do this he could die." She looked at her.

"Why don't we just take him to the hospital?" It hadn't even crossed her mind.

Chloe looked around frantically, 'Think of something...think of something.' "Because Lois if we took him there we might never get to see him again. There's no telling what Lex did to him in that lab, and you know that he owns over half the staff, they would take him from us forever. I don't know about you but I'm not will to let that happen, I don't know if I'd be willing to live with the fact that I sent him there. Basically killing him." She shot Lois an evil glare as she remembered the act of evil Lois had committed.

Lois did nothing but return the glare. "I killed him because that's what he deserved. He on numerous occasions, I'm sure, tried to kill Clark or brought him to the brink torturing him. He had it coming to him."

"LOIS! No one deserves to die, not even him. I don't care how much he made Clark suffer, how angry you were or anything! YOU KILLED A MAN! Do you expect to just get away with that?"

Lois shook her head. "Nope. I expect to be punished to the full extent of the law."

Chloe looked at her face, confused. "Why did you do it Lois? What pushed you to the edge, to the point of no return?"

Lois looked at her and she saw the tears streaming down her face. "Right before I killed him I told him, 'This is for Clark you heartless bastard.' And that is what I meant. What pushed me? The thought of him hurting Clark more than he already had. I snapped Chloe when I saw him shoot him. I killed him because I knew that if I didn't some way, some how, Lex would find away out of it and hurt him again." She looked at Chloe and began to wipe her own tears. She then placed her hand back on Clark's scarred arm.

He had been quiet the entire time, absorbing everything that was said. He wasn't proud that Lois had killed Lex, he agreed with Chloe on that. But when he heard Lois's reasoning for doing it, his mind started reeling. He had to talk to Lois later. "Now if we are done chatting, I think we have a person to save." She smiled at Clark but he didn't return it, too much pain was coursing through his body to smile at her again. He looked to Chloe who had picked up the rubbing alcohol and a cotton ball.

She said, "This might sting a bit. I'm sorry."

He looked up, "Don't be." And Lois gave him a weird look, 'I always say that.'

Inhale, exhale. She covered the top of the bottle with the ball and turned it upside down allowing the cotton to absorb the liquid. She darted her eyes back and forth between the shoulder and the cotton and steadily starting moving it towards his flesh. He jumped at the contact, feeling the cold liquid burn him. Lois grabbed his arms, she was preparing to hold him down. Chloe looked at her warily as she took the cotton ball away and picked up the knife. She directed her gaze towards the shoulder, unable to look at his eyes. His breathing started staggering; he was no longer calmed by Lois's touch. Lois couldn't look at him either, she was afraid if she did she would let him go and he would get hurt even worse.

Chloe touched the knife to his skin and he didn't move, he held his breath. He no longer had to worry about his abilities hurting them. After such a long exposure to Kryptonite he was sure they wouldn't come back so soon. "I'm really, really, really sorry about this."

"You can do this Chloe." Lois said.

She applied a little pressure and she heard his skin give way. He didn't move. Lois watched intently, she had one hand on his wrist checking his pulse. Chloe pushed it in a bit deeper, still nothing from him. She let out the breath she had been holding in and she slid it in a bit further. He jerked a bit but she didn't stop until she felt the knife touch something. She let out another breath and felt the sweat start to gather on her forehead. She slowly pulled the knife towards her and he jerked some more, but no screaming and no crying. He was pulling in air through his mouth, his face turning red from his refrain from yelling. Lois just starred at him, he was trying to be brave and they were the ones scared. She heard some more skin rip and she winced, the noise was awful. She looked at the gash it was about ½ inch long and she didn't care to know how deep.

As soon as Chloe took the knife out the blood started flowing rapidly. Chloe quickly grabbed a towel and held it to it. She looked at Clark who was starting to freak, "You're doing good. I've got to try and get it out Clark. Please don't squeeze me or Lois." She turned to Lois. "Lois I need you to hold the towel and try to catch the blood." Lois nodded and let go of his left arm and grabbed the towel holding it just above his nipple. Her other hand remained snaked around his wrist, still monitoring his pulse.

Chloe quickly grabbed the needle nose pliers and remembered Clark saying he had been shot before, other shoulder with his parents. She shook off the thought and wiped the sweat from her forehead and his shoulder and began lowering the pliers into the bleeding hole. He started squirming, his face turning bright red as he tried to regain control. "Clark you need to let go." He looked to Lois and she said it again, "Let go." With another quick glance he did as he was told and he let go of his emotions and his breath. Tears began to fall and his breathing patterns accelerated. Lois had more trouble holding him down and she felt his pulse increase rapidly. She looked at Chloe whose main goal was to get the bullet out and that was the only thing she was focused on. She looked at the towel which had turned from bleach white to blood red in seconds, it was sopping wet.

"LOIS! GET ME ANOTHER TOWEL! THE BLOODS BUILDING UP I CAN'T SEE!" She grabbed a flashlight and held it so it shined on the incision. Lois looked at Clark frantically and he began to scream. He jerked forward and push the bullet in farther causing him to scream louder. She looked to Chloe who was desperately trying to keep her emotions in check as she pushed the pliers in farther. "LOIS! NOW!" And she got up and sprinted from the room to the kitchen for another towel. Seconds later she noticed Clark had stopped screaming. She tore through the drawers tearing them out each time they were wrong, they busted on the floor. She found them to be in the very last drawer, grabbed a handful and ran for Clark's life. She heard Chloe scream, "CLARK!!! BREATHE!!!" And Lois was by his side.

He looked so calm, "Oh God." She whispered and grabbed his wrist. No pulse. No pulse, this can't be happening again. Chloe was frantically beating on his chest when she notice the pliers on the floor with the bullet inside them. "Chloe what happened?"

Chloe never stopped beating on his chest, tears running ramped on her face. "I don't know!" Suck in air-let it out. "He just stopped bleeding and breathing!" Suck in air-let it out. "I can't get his heart to start!" Suck in air-let it out.

Lois looked to her bracelet; it wasn't glowing like it did last time. She looked over at Chloe who had crumpled in the floor crying unable to hit his chest anymore. Lois moved to his side and tried to compress his chest but it was like trying to compress a lead block. So she did what Chloe had been doing, beating to only find that it compressed a small amount. It would have to do. Her breathing was heightened, her heart racing. "I AM NOT LOSING YOU AGAIN!" she screamed through her tears. She continued punching with all her might.

She didn't care that she would have bruises on her hands tomorrow, she didn't care that she was balling her eyes out, she didn't care that Chloe was sitting right behind her frightened as she watched her cousin desperately try to beat Clark back to life. "Clark Kent you better wake your ass up! Smallville I mean it! This isn't funny anymore! WAKE UP!" She was trying everything from smacking his face, pocking his eyes, blowing in his ear and she even hit him in the balls but nothing would jump start him back to her. She wasn't going to lose hope, if there was one thing she did have it was hope. She beat on his chest some more, the skin she was hitting didn't even turn red.

"Lois..." Chloe slowly crept up behind her. "Lois I think he's gone. There's nothing we can do..." She made a grab for her arm only to be knocked to the ground.

Lois resumed hitting, "He is NOT dead! He will NOT die! DON'T TELL ME THAT THERE IS NOTHING I CAN DO! I WILL SAVE HIM! He will NOT be taken from me again!" Her beating started to slow down. Her breathing became more of gasps as she tried so hard to save him. "I just can't lose him!"

Her beating came to a halt and she placed her hands on his face, her head on his chest facing his face. "He means everything to me. I'd be lost if he was gone. He's the only man that can break through my walls and really talk to me. He's got such a big heart Chloe, it's so full of love that he has yet to give." She rubbed her fingers over his lips. Chloe just sat there and watched as the bracelet turned from blue to yellow and as each tear she dropped turned into flames. "He's going to make some woman so happy. I wish I could be her. I would be the luckiest woman in the world to have Clark Kent." She sniffled.

Chloe scooted back as she watched the flaming tears began to form around her in a circular pattern. 'How could she not notice this?'

"Hell I am the luckiest woman in the world, he already told me he loves me." She lifted her head up and placed her nose on top of his. "Don't die Clark Joseph Kent. Don't leave me on this Earth without you. You wanna know why?" She bent down and kissed him passionately on the lips. "Because I wanna love you with all my heart."

Chloe looked shocked...for a second. 'He loves her, she loves him? I KNEW IT!' she smirked. She looked back at Lois, the flames surrounding her had become stronger and brighter, she almost looked like a mini sun. With a burst of light Lois was lifted into the air. She turned and faced Clark, she placed her hand on his heart and said, "I love you always and forever." Like a jolt of lightning hit them, she was thrown back into the wall and he just up gasping for breath. Chloe ran to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, he was still to weak to reciprocate. She kept saying, "Thank you God!" over and over and over again. Lois looked up from where she was sitting and caught his eyes. He was simply beaming. He mouthed the words, "Thank you." And she blushed. He didn't say I love you, she knew that, but just watching his mouth move and see him alive made her overwhelmed with joy. It didn't go unnoticed by him, though he would never admit it.


	6. Recovery and Repair

Chapter 6: Recovery and Repair

The limo pulled up to the site where so much blood had been shed just minutes before. He watched as the small Sedan pulled out and sped away, wondering why it was here in the first place. He shook his head, "Probably some stupid kids." He mumbled.

He put down his headset phone and looked out the window. There was a familiar body lying on the ground. "Driver! Stop the car!" He jumped out before the car had come to a halt and was smacked in the leg with the door which only stopped him momentarily. He ran to the body and turned it over only to fall backwards onto the ground with a smack as his heart leapt from his chest. "Martha? Oh God Martha!" His hands went over her face; it was still warm. He looked her over and it only took a second to find the gapping bullet wound in her left shoulder, right where her heart should be. "JAMES CALL AN AMBULANCE! HURRY!".

The man he had named as James stepped out of the limo to see what was going on. Seconds later he saw the familiar flicker of red hair that he was used to seeing in the car. He frantically grabbed his cell phone and proceeded to dial 911.

He pushed her hair from her face and gently began to rock her back and forth in his arms. He put his fingers to her and throat and waited. Thump...(2 seconds later)...Thump... He smiled, it was slow but it was there. He took off his suit jacket and wrapped it around her. "Everything will be alright. I'm not losing the second woman I've loved to death, no not this time." He kissed her on the forehead.

"Mr. Luthor!"

"Yes James?"

"They're on their way!"

"Thank you James." And he continued to rock her back and forth, her blood trickling down his arm onto the already redden pavement.

"Chloe.." He choked out. "Chloe...can't...breathe..." She laughed nervously and helped him lean back against the couch.

"Oh, sorry." She said and he attempted to smile. "I thought I'd never see you alive again Clark. After those 2 years and what happened now, I guess I just got a little carried away." She shrugged her shoulders nervously. She turned when she heard the floor creak. Lois was getting up rubbing her back a bit and walking over to them.

She took a seat in front of Clark on the coffee table and smiled at Chloe. "That's an understatement." She said with a laugh as Chloe made a fist and playfully swung at her.

Lois turned her attention to Clark; his eyes were barely open staring at her. 'That's my Lois.' He kept thinking. Her blush intensified, if possible, and he cracked one of his world famous Kent smiles. She looked at him and she couldn't help but smile back. 'Hey it might be a little bloody and scratchy but I'll take what I can get.'

Chloe, intrigued, watched for a second turning her gaze from Lois to Clark and vice versa. She noticed Lois make a move towards Clark's hand with her own again when she remembered there was still work to be done. "Um...Lois?" Lois pulled her hand away and looked innocently at Chloe. "We've still got to get him fixed up remember?"

"Oh, yeah." She said gloomily. She had temporarily forgotten everything that had gone wrong when she saw Clark come back to life. She placed a shaky hand on his arm, "We're going to make you as good as new Smallville." She stopped to think about what she said and then she looked back at him with a raised eye brow. "Or possibly even better! Maybe this time you won't brood so much!" She cracked a smile and Chloe smacked her.

"You don't need to be getting him all riled up Lois, so please, for the first time in your life shut it." Lois looked at her to complain. "I said shut it Lane!"

And Lois folded her arms and pouted. She looked to Clark for some back up and his eyes were shut. She frowned and she immediately grabbed his wrist again to check his pulse when his eyes peeped open. She let out a sigh of relief and he didn't have the strength to say anything to her so he closed his eyes again. 'He's so cute when he's tried.' And almost like he heard what she said he smiled. She just looked at him curiously and shrugged it off.

Chloe grabbed his right hand carefully and to her shock found that the skin had grown over the bullets, they were literally lodged inside his hand. She glanced at the other hand and it was the same way. She looked at Lois sideways. She hadn't noticed but she would. She looked at his face and there were swollen lumps of skin all over it where the glad could still be seen. 'She hasn't noticed? Has Lois gone completely duh today?' The only good thing was that all the scars were no longer infected and there wasn't a cut left to be sewn. "Lois?" Chloe said a little too nervously hoping to draw her attention away from him.

"Yeah Chloe?"

"Um.." 'Come on...come on...bracelte.' "What's up with that bracelet? Why did you burst into a ball of flames? I mean this is Smallville but.."

"Chloe you're rambling. Why are you so nervous?" Lois looked at her worried.

"Me nervous? Psh. No! Ha..ha..ha...smooth." She whispered.

"Chloe?" Lois started to scoot towards her.

"He..he.." And her cell phone started ringing. "Oh thank you GOD!" Lois gave her a strange look. "Lois can you go get that for me?" She asked giving her best puppy face she could think of.

Lois stared at her for a minute then she got up and walked from the room whispering, "She is so weird sometimes..."

Chloe let out a breath. "Clark," she whispered so only he could hear.

"Hmmm?" He mumbled with his eyes still closed.

"Clark wake up!" She would shake him but she could probably...hurt him?

"Yeah Chloe...yeah..." He started to roll over.

"CLARK!" She whispered her scream. "Wake up for one minute!"

He popped an eye open and looked at her for a second and saw the worried look on her face. "What's," yawn, "wrong?"

"Clark, your skin is covering the bullets and glass. All your scars are heeled."

He looked at her like she was retarded, "Um...what's the problem then?"

"Ok. You must really be out of it." She felt of his forehead, "Temperatures normally for your alien body." She checked his pulse, "You're still alive. Ok. Clark, those bullets and pieces of glass are lodged inside of you! Your skin has become impenetrable again! I can't get them out! Lois is going to notice and I don't know if you're thinking straight here but that would mean she would probably suspect that something was fishy around here!" She said all of that in one breath so she was desperately trying to get it back. "There I said it."

"I know." He was staring up at the ceiling.

"You know? You know what? That you've got glass and bullets buried in your skin or that Lois might find out your secret because of them?" She looked at him shaking her head, there was a lot of confusion going on today.

"Both."

"What are you going to do about the glass and bullets?" She looked at him curiously.

He looked at her and raised his hand, "This." He scratched at his face a bit and pulled a piece of glass out with a little dab of blood before it healed again. To Chloe is looked painful but to him, to him it was nothing compared to the pain of what he had already been through. She held out the pan to him and he dropped each piece of glass on it as he pulled them out. She looked away, having seen enough blood pour from him tonight.

When she stopped hearing things clang against the pan she turned and looked: 9 shards of glass and 6 bullets, the other bullet lying in the floor. She sat it down and looked at him; she has yet to ask him the other question that was buzzing around in her mind. "Clark? What about Lois finding out your secret?"

"It'll be ok Chloe." And he started to roll over when he felt her arm touch his.

"Clark you can't avoid this and expect it to go away. It isn't going to work like that." She whispered as calmly as she could. She knew Clark had fears but this was ridiculous.

"Chloe...I just don't want to think about it right now. It brings up bad memories." He had tears flowing down his face; he truly didn't want to talk about this tonight or ever again. Last time he tried to tell Lois he got his heart broken, he didn't want more pain in his life.

Chloe looked at him sympathetically and sighed. "You're going to have to open up some time and when that happens, I'll be here." She rubbed his arm and he continued to roll over and fall asleep.

Lois walked into the kitchen and picked up the phone. "Lionel Luthor? What do you want?"

"Lois, I found Martha."

Lois bowed her head and tears began to form in hers eyes yet again, they never stopped. "Yeah I know, I'm sorry that she's dead Lionel, I really am but I don't have time to give you all the details." She started to hang up the phone when she heard him yell her name. "What?"

"Martha's not dead. We are at the Smallville Medical Center, she still alive and in stable condition."

She dropped the phone and took off running through the house to the living room for the second time that night.

Chloe looked up and saw Lois panting. "Lois are you ok?" She got up and walked over to her.

Lois threw her arms around her and started to cry. "Chloe..."She sniffled.

"Yeah Lois? What is it?"

She smiled and whispered in her ear, "Mrs. Kent's still alive."

"911. What's your emergency?"

"I would like to report a murder and to turn my self in for committing it."

"Um...ok. Can you give me an address or your name miss?" The operator's voice shook on the other line.

"Luthor Mansion, Smallville." Click. She lifted up his bleeding bald held and looked at the bullet hole in the back. Chloe had called her right after she got off the phone with Lois to tell her what they were going to do. Despite their differences and everything that has happened, she still cared about Lois.

She smiled and shook his head while dropping it back on the floor. She was going to sit and wait for the police and ambulances to arrive. "Anything for you Lois." She crossed her legs, looked out the window and smacked Lex in the head. He couldn't feel it, she wished she could hear him scream from pain. It would be a lot easier way to pass the time.

"Are you sure?" screamed Chloe.

"Yes Chloe! She's in Smallville Medical Center!" Lois screamed back.

"AH!!!!!!" They screamed together.

Clark raised his head off the couch a bit. "Will you two be quiet? I'm trying to sleep."

"Clark wake up!" Chloe yelled running across the room.

"SMALLVILLE GUESS WHAT!" Lois yelled chasing Chloe.

He tried to roll over, "Lois...I'm too tired."

"NOT FOR THIS!" She screamed happily.

He lifted his head again, "Huh?"

Together they looked at him and screamed, "YOUR MOM'S ALIVE!" They jumped up and down on the couch screaming like little kids.

Clark sat straight up and tried to stand, "Mom?" He just ended up falling back on the couch.

"Whoa there Clark." Chloe said nearly falling off the couch to catch him.

"Yeah Smallville. You're not a superman, you've gotta give yourself time to heal before you stand." She giggled.

Determined to stand again he said, "I've got to see my mom."

Chloe looked at him quizzically, "Clark didn't you hear what Lois just said?"

"Chloe I have to go see her." He looked at her with pleading eyes.

She gave in, no one can resist his puppy dog face. "Ok. BUT! You have to get cleaned up first. I don't want those nurses looking at us funny." She smiled.

He looked at her appreciatively, "Ok...yeah...how am I supposed to do that? I can barely stand." He looked between Lois and Chloe, they began glaring at each other the second he said that.

"Lois.." Chloe warned.

"What?" Lois looked at her innocently.

"You've seen him naked." Chloe said.

"Yeah so?" Lois said like it was no big deal.

Clark looked between them. "I'm right here."

Chloe shook her head, "I don't care to see."

Lois laughed, "You'll get over it."

Clark," Yep, still right here."

Chloe, "LOIS!"

Lois, "CHLOE! I've seen that stuff once, I'm good."

Clark looked out the window. "The sky's green did you know that? Bet ya didn't know that." It was pitch black outside.

Chloe crossed her arms, "Lois, just go help him."

"Why me? Why can't it be you?" Lois whined.

Chloe looked at her like she was about to smack her. "Don't make me answer that."

Lois laughed sarcastically. "OH PLEASE ENLIGHTEN ME!"

Clark looked out the window and saw a silhouette reflecting the moon light. "There's someone outside."

Chloe looked around frantically, "I...I...I have a boyfriend! I don't need to see any ones stuff but his." Chloe became calm again.

Lois looked at her and dropped her mouth. "Wait a minute!!! You've seen Jimmy's package?" She bit her lip trying not to laugh, "What it big?"

Clark looked at them, he couldn't get up. "GIRLS!!"

Chloe looked at Lois, "I'm not answering that. Now help him get clean, I'm sure you'll enjoy seeing him naked again." She raised an eyebrow.

Lois raised her own in return. "Just because he's huge..."

Clark looked up, "LOIS!"

She looked from him back to Chloe smiling. "Well it's not my fault he's packing."

Clark threw the pan against the floor scaring them both. "GGGGGIIIRRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLLSSSSSSS!" He screamed.

They looked at him, "WHAT!"

He calmed down and pointed to the window. "There's someone outside."

Chloe walked to the door and opened it. "What? Who could it possibly..." The silhouette came into the light from the house. "be.."

Lois took a step forward to see and almost fell over. "Lana? Oh joy...where's a pick up truck when you need one?" She started to look around the room.

Clark looked up at her then looked to Lana and back at Lois again. "Lois?"

She didn't look at him, "Yeah Smallville?"

He looked at her warily, "Please don't tell me you hurt her."

She looked at him and smiled. "Yep. I threw her off the pack of a pick up truck."

Clark looked at her stunned. "LOIS! HOLY CRAP!"

She looked at Lana, "What? Your mom helped."

He shook his head. "My mom wouldn't do something like that."

Lois walked over and placed a hand on his shoulder and bit her lip. "Yeah about that...she did. Sorry to burst your..."She looked down at his crotch then back to his face. "'Packing' bubble but..."

A huge grin spread across her face as he looked down and placed his hand over himself. He looked back at her warningly, "Lois..." He growled.

She took a step back and started waving her hands in the air. "Sorry...I'll be quiet now. Clark Jr. might bite me!" She screamed like a little girl. Clark looked at her and laughed sarcastically. She took another step forward and began looking him over, "Ya know on second thought I think I will help you out Clark."

He looked up and gritted his teeth, "Thanks Lois."

She smiled and patted his leg, bent down in front of him so she was between his knees. "Oh don't thank me Clark." She said devilishly. "Many women would kill to be in my position." She laughed and got up before he could say another word. She walked over to the door where Lana stood wide-eyed. "Lana, what are you doing here? I thought I made it clear that we don't want you around."

Lana looked up at her disgusted, "Look Lois. I don't care what you think. I came here to see Clark, not your b#$hing $$."

Chloe looked around nervously. "Haha. Right Lois?" She grabbed Lois's arm just to have it pulled away.

"Excuse me? You might want to stop there before I break the rest of your limbs, OFF!" She took a step towards Lana.

Chloe looked scared, "Lois...please..."

Lois turned and looked at her. "Chloe don't stand up for this disgusting thing. She doesn't deserve your sympathies after what she did to Clark." Face Lana, "Did you know that he nearly died a minute ago? He can barely stand now Lana. None of this would have happened if you hadn't of came along."

Lana took a step forward. "Oh really? Funny me I remember him saying that YOU broke his heart so he came running to ME! So technically that would make this your fault now wouldn't it?" Lana cocked her hips and waited for a reply.

Lois took another step forward and looked down on her coldly. "I didn't help Lex try to kill him. I didn't stand on the sidelines and watch as he was tortured when I could have done something to stop it." Another step forward. "If you EVER come near me, Clark or Chloe again and/or threaten us you will learn the wrath of a Lane." She wrapped her hand around Lana's throat and shoved her up against a wall and whispered in her ear, "And you won't be limping away to tell about it." She let her go and Lana ran out the door. Lois cracked a smile of accomplishment while Clark and Chloe looked at her in awe.

She turned and looked at them fully composed. She looked at Clark, walked to him and held out her hand. He looked at Chloe and she just shrugged. "Let's get you cleaned up Smallville. Move it!" He hesitantly grabbed her hand and she slowly pulled him up. He winced; though the scars had been healed the pain was still very much there.

He nearly fell but Lois recovered him and threw his arm around her shoulder. He couldn't really move his hand as it landed on her breast and he blushed. She smiled and moved it, "Boy scout trying to get some? Naughty, naughty." He just turned his head too embarrassed to make eye contact. She shook her head. "Alright then now that you've groped me," ,brighter shade of red, "let's get you upstairs so I can see you naked!" purple. "One leg in front of the other, well the one standing is already in front in my list." Maroon. She turned back to see Chloe rolling in the floor laughing. She looked up, hit her head on the coffee table, put her hand on the spot, said ow and continued to laugh. She looked at Clark who was about to dig a hole in the floor to hide in and tried to hide her laugh.

She moved one of her legs and he leaned on her taking a step of his own. She watched his eyes as they moved, they were colored with pain. But yet he took another step. If he wasn't going to give up then neither was she. They made it to the stairs and he looked at them warily then he looked at her. "Lois I don't think I can make it."

"Do you think you can step up one?"

He lifted his leg, he made it half way up the step and his face reflected his thoughts, 'It hurts, oh God it hurts. I can't disappoint her, I won't.' And so he kept trying, getting a little higher with each breath until he was able to set his foot on the stair. She smiled, "We shouldn't try to push on those legs just yet, I'm sure that would be too much." He looked at her sadly, he wanted to try. He hated feeling weak. Her smile dropped, "But if you wanna try go ahead." He looked down at his foot and his face began to scrunch up as he applied pressure. The grip on her boob tightened but he didn't notice, well he pretended not to notice. Deep in that dirty little corner of his mind he was noticing a lot and he liked it a lot. Right now he was in too much pain to put that in the front of his mind, but it was still in there.

His weight slowly shifted and since she wasn't on the stair with him he was on his own. He got up on the foot and swung the other one around, it was the first of 12 but for him it was a big accomplishment. He didn't even look at Lois as he started to take the next stair and toppled over backwards on the floor, nearly landing on her. "AH!!!!!" he screamed as he curled into a ball desperately trying to get off his back.

"That's enough for today Clark." She said bending down to comfort him. "Maybe the hot water will help." She put one arm behind his neck and one under his knees and lifted. She went up the stairs one at a time, concentrating on not dropping him again. When they made it to the top she sat him down and helped him limp into the bathroom.

Chloe looked up from the floor no longer laughing at what she had just witnessed. "She's killing his pride. If she doesn't let him do this on his own he'll be break." She whispered. "I'll talk to her later." She went into the kitchen and started making some coffee.

Clark sat down on the bathroom floor staring at the wall as if immobilized. He was doing anything he could to not look at Lois. She didn't know if he was hurt or what so she touched his shoulder and he flinched just like before, she knew this and tried again only to have him scoot away from her. She looked at him confused, "Clark? What's wrong?"

"Nothing Lois. Just..."

"Clark." She said firmly. "Don't play dumb with me. Why are you angry?"

"Lois I just want to get clean and see my mom. Is that too much to ask?"

He still wasn't looking at her so she bent down in front of him. He yet again turned his head. "Are you hurt?"

"No."

"Why won't you tell me what's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong."

She watched him for a minute and it clicked in her mind. "Your pride." His stare became deadly at the wall. "I hurt your pride by packing you up those stairs."

He looked at his legs and watched as she sat down beside him, stretching her legs alongside of his. "I feel so weak. I hate feeling weak."

"Clark you're only human." She watched his head turn again and tears well up in his eyes. "You have to rest and take these things slowly otherwise you'll end up getting hurt worse."

"I just want to feel...better again. I'm sick of waiting for that." He looked at her. "This just feels like a dream Lois, and I'm so scared to wake up. If I wake up I'll be back in that room dying." He dropped his gaze. "I don't want this to end. I don't want to lose you again."

She put her hand in his and he looked up. She took her other hand and pulled his face to hers and she gently kissed him on the lips. Surprised at first he pulled back and looked into her eyes. All he saw was her love, not her feeling sorry for him like he had expected, just pure, honest love. He leaned back in and kissed her just as gently as she kissed him. He scooted in closer and put one arm around her waist pulling her in. She bit his lower lip and he winced but he didn't care that it hurt, he wanted her and to make it better she wanted him just as much. He opened his mouth and she slid her tongue in ever so slightly, teasing him as his tongue battled with hers.

She pulled back, kissed his forehead and watched him smile contently. "You're not dreaming." She picked up his hand and sat it on her heart. "Feel that? That's real." She smiled. "Now let's get you naked!"

His smile dropped and he began to wring his hands. "Um...Lois. I don't think that's such a good idea right now."

She snickered. "Oh come on Smallville. I've seen it all before, it won't hurt for me to see again."

He looked up at her, she knew why he didn't want to, she was testing him, challenging him even. "Lois." He said firmly.

She cracked a smile. "Alright, alright. No funny stuff from this end I promise." He gave her that 'I don't believe you' look. "I swear! I'm not lying! No funny stuff!"

He grabbed at her hand as she stood and pulled himself most of the way up. She leaned him up against the counter and stood at a safe distance to catch him if he fell. He looked at her nervously but still slid his fingers under the fabric and began to pull it down. That was his only cover, that small piece of fabric and she looked at it nervously...it looked familiar. "Clark?"

He looked up at her. "Yeah Lois?"

"Is that made from one of your flannel shirts?" she pointed at it.

He looked down and nodded. "At first I didn't have any clothing, but Lana saved my shirt and made this for me. Every 2 months she could come and visit me and give me anything she wanted as long as she didn't set me free. One day she just came in with this." He looked up at her, "I was so thankful."

Lois looked at him, "Because it was embarrassing to be nude all the time?"

He shook his head, "No."

"Then why?"

He frowned and said quietly, "Because Lex said any exposed skin was fair game."

Lois gasped, she couldn't believe that Lex would do that to him or even think about it. "He didn't um...hurt you did he?"

Clark looked up and smiled. "No. Lana begged him not to. I guess that's why I got so mad when you said you hurt her." He looked down at his hands, "She took care of me all that time. I didn't want to see her hurt. She knows she made a mistake by taking me there."

"I'm not sorry that I hurt her." Lois gave him a defying look. "No matter how sorry she was, she never set you free." She grabbed his hands, "I would have done anything to get you out if I knew you were there." He looked into her eyes and shook his head. He knew.

He reached for the fabric again and slowly slid it down and as promised Lois backed away and didn't do anything to him. She reached into the closet and pulled out a wash cloth and a towel and handed it to him. He set them on the edge of the tub. He glanced from the tub to her and she got the message. She walked over and turned on the water. "Smallville you like it hot or warm?"

Without thinking he replied, "It doesn't really matter I can't tell temperature any way."

She smiled. "Ok. Well scalding hot it is!" She turned the water on full blast and allowed it to fill before turning back to Clark. She accidentally glanced at Jr. and what she saw worried her. He wasn't standing. She stood and held out her arm which he grabbed a hold of and stepped in, sinking down into the water. "You going to be alright in there Smallville?" He nodded. "I'm going to go talk to Chloe and give you some privacy." He smiled thanking her.

She took off out the door a little to fast and ran down the stairs. She found Chloe in the kitchen making coffee. "Oh thank God. Boy do I need a cup." She grabbed the pot and poured herself some.

Chloe laughed. "Too much naked Clark for you?" Lois sat down at the table and ran her fingers around the rim of the cup. "Lois what's wrong? Is something wrong with him?"

Lois scooted in making sure Clark wouldn't be able to hear her and told her everything she witnessed and heard in the bathroom. Chloe just sat there in shock. "So you think Lex did something to him?"

Lois shook her head, "No. I think Lana did."

"LOIS!" She heard him yell from the bathroom and she gave Chloe another look and left to help him out.

30 minutes later they had made it to the medical center and were in Mrs. Kent's room. Clark was talking to her and she was crying. Lois only heard glimpses of the conversation and what she heard scared her. "Jor-el told me that she basically um...broke me mom."

"Oh, sweet heart I'm sorry. Will it ever get better?"

He dropped his head. "There's Kryptonite in it. I don't know how to get it out without hurting myself."

"Sweetie I know you'll find away."

He looked up. "I think Lois knows that somethings wrong. She asked me about it...I hate lying to her mom."

She put her hand on his head. "Sweetie, you do what you have to, to survive. This time is more difficult for you than all of us. You've got to be strong and when you're ready to tell Lois and ask her for help you will. Don't let your pride get in the way of seeking her help ok?"

"It's kinda embarrassing mom."

"Would you rather me help?"

"What? Um.."

"Exactly."

"Lois Lane?" A police officer was standing at the door.

"Um yes officer?" She said warily. Everyone in the room was looking at her.

"Could you step outside for a moment?" He asked politely.

"Yes sir." She got up and walked from the room.

"I would like to ask you some questions about the murder of Lex Luthor if that would be ok."

"Yes of course." She answered nervously.

"We already have the woman who committed the crime in custody Miss Lane. Can you vouch for her?"

"It depends on who it is."

"Bring her over here please." He called over his shoulder.

Lois looked to where his eyes where and her mouth dropped. "Lucy?"

She smiled. "Hey big sis! Long time no see!" She shook her hand cuffs and just laughed.

"Lucy?! Ok...what the hell?" Lois looked at her confused.

"Well Lois, I was in the neighborhood so I..." She said confidently.

"Dropped in and murdered Lex? How did you know my gun wasn't loaded?"

"Chloe told me. She also told me to go there undetected and do what I had to to protect you and Clark. And I did." She said triumphantly.

Lois turned around and looked at her cousin that just exited the room. "Chloe?"

She looked up at her and smiled. "Yeah Lois?"

"Why didn't you tell me you called Lucy? And where was she?"

She looked to Lucy and winked, "If I had told you then you wouldn't have let her help. And she was in Smallville."

She turned to Lucy, "You were in Smallville? Damn right I wouldn't let you help! Does the general know you're here?"

Lucy groaned, "No, but I assume when all of this is settled out he will."

Lois rolled her eyes, "You are so thick headed Lucy."

Lucy took a step forward, "HEY! I saved you and your little boyfriends butts back there and I'm going to jail for it!"

Lois raised an eyebrow, "Boyfriend? He's not my boyfriend."

Chloe puts her hands on her hips, she knew Clark had followed her out there and was standing right behind her. "Oh really Lois?"

"Shut up Chloe."

Lucy noticed him standing there too and said, "Clark what do you think about this?"

He looked to Lois with no emotions on his face but the hurt was evident in his eyes. "Clark how did you get out here?" She reached out to grab his shoulder and he pulled away. He leaned up against the wall and limped his way back into the room. She hit the wall and turned back to Lucy. "See what you made me do?"

Lucy laughed. "What I made you do? You screwed that up all by yourself Lois."

Chloe looked on concerned, "Lois, you better go get him."

Lois released a breath. "Yeah." She turned and headed into the room and stopped right inside the doorway. He was watching his mom sleep with the hurt still evident in his eyes. She took another step in and walked over to the window her back facing him. She looked up at that same star, it was flickering in and out still. She turned to speak. "Smallville I'm so..."

He kept his hand by his mom's and continued to watch her sleep. "No Lois it's ok. Sh..she's resting."

Lois glanced between them and shook her head. "Clark we really need to talk about this."

"No. It can wait."

She walked up beside him. "Clark no it can't. I hurt you out there and I'm sorry. I didn't mean it, I truly didn't. I see you as more than a friend, my boyfriend even. It's just so scary though because now I know that if I screw up I might lose you again. I don't think I can live with that." She looked at his hands.

He still wasn't looking at her, he just turned his head to look out the window and slipped his hand into hers. "Lois I feel the same way. I've felt that way since day one, when we started having those dreams about kissing each other, every single night." He winked at her.

She smiled, 'That was incredibly sexy. God I want to jump him. WAIT!!! Please tell me I didn't just say that out loud.' "You had those dreams too?" She squeezed his hand.

He looked into her eyes and kissed her on the cheek, she leaned into his touch. "Yep. Every night when I would wake up after it and I was still in that room, everything felt just a little more ok."

Her smile faded as she remembered that green room. "Clark I'm so sorry that I couldn't get to you sooner. I could have saved you a lot of pain."

He put his finger under he chin and lifted, her eyes were watery. He stroked his thumb across her cheek. "Don't go blaming yourself for any of it Lois. I wouldn't have asked you to come any sooner. It was my fault not yours."

Anger filled her eyes. "It was Lana's fault."

He dropped his hand and rolled his eyes. "We've already discussed this."

She snorted. "Yeah and well obviously she did something to you that you seem too afraid of to tell me." She reflected on only minutes before the conversation between him and Martha Kent.

He shot her a dirty look. "Lois..."

"No Clark I want answers. Why are you defending her when she hurt you?"

"I told you already." He was looking at her hand that was clinched into a fist.

"Pfft. Yeah...yeah..." She rolled her hand in the air. "She begged him not to cut you short or to make you into a Eunice. She made you that underwear thing so you wouldn't get hurt down there because she still wants a piece. Yep got that. What's the next thing after that?" Her jealousy was over coming her as her thoughts turned to what could have happened to him after that.

He looked out the window. "There's nothing after that."

Anger boiling, "Yeah and the fact that you aren't able to look at me proves that."

"Lois I don't want to talk about it."

She looked at him. "I noticed."

He immediately turned around and got in her face, his anger evident as well. "What do you want me to say Lois?"

"Tell me if she hurt you. I don't need the details right now, I just want to know if she hurt you."

He looked at his hand still snaked inside of hers. "Yes, she did hurt me."

"Alright. Now why are you defending her?"

"I don't remember."

Her anger flared again. "Clark.."

He looked at her with the guiltiest look in his eyes. "Lois I swear I don't remember. I don't even remember half the crap that happened to me in there. I just know that I woke up every morning with a new pain in a new place."

She looked into his eyes, something was still being hidden in his sole. "And now?"

"I don't hurt as much but the pain is still there."

She looked away, too afraid to know if he did remember all the horrible things they did to him. She reached into her purse and pulled out his journal. She stuffed it in their earlier so she could give it back to him.

He smiled as he took it from her hands. He opened it and looked it over. "How long did it take you to get the lock off?"

"1 hour."

He smirked, "Funny I was thinking about 2. The key was in that shirt on the closet floor." He continued to read.

Her mouth dropped. "Crap."

He looked up a little and laughed at her expression. "I knew you wouldn't look there."

She scooted in closer. "Ah, Smallville you know me so well."

He looked her body up and down. "Yes, yes I do." He looked back down at the book and mumbled, "Sailor."

She slapped his arm. "Watch it Emler."

"Sorry. Sailor..."

"SMALLVILLE!"

"Lois! My mom's trying to sleep." He put his hand over her mouth.

She pulled it away and smiled sheepishly, "Sorry."

He looked back to the journal. "Did you read it?"

She scooted beside him and put her head on his shoulder. "Yeah. I didn't understand most of it because it was so cryptic. Well except for the last 3 written pages, I understood everything but Jor-el and Krypt..."

"Kryptonite."

"Yeah that." She lifted her head from his shoulder and stopped him from flipping the pages. "What is that?"

He looked at her and said, "You remember that room I was in with the green walls?" She nodded her head. "Kryptonite."

"Oh. What does it do?"

He sighed. "Makes me weak."

She looked at him confused. "Why didn't it make me weak?"

He just stared at her. "I don't think I can explain that right now."

"Why not?"

"It's a long story Lois."

"Your secret?"

He looked up at her again. "What?"

"It's about your secret isn't it?"

"Yes."

"Why can't you open up to me like you wanted to?" The hurt was evident in her voice.

He flipped to the 2nd page and showed her a line that read, "Anyone who knows is in danger."

She sighed, she knew he was trying to protect her no matter how much she didn't want him to. "I know you trust me. I can wait."

He looked up surprised by her words. "Really?"

She smiled. "Yeah. It can't be any worse than being a meteor freak right?" She laughed and he didn't. He turned yet again and looked out the window. "Clark? Are you?"

He shook his head somberly, "No."

"Then it's worse?"

"Yes."

"Oh." She couldn't comprehend what could be worse than living as a freak, but she would let it be for now.

Chloe stuck her head in the door, "Lois?"

Lois turned around happy for the interruption. "Yeah Chloe?"

"I'm heading back to the farm. You two better say goodbye for now." She retracted her head and began to walk away.

Lois yelled down the hall, "Be there in a minute."

"K."

She turned back to Mrs. Kent and looked down at her, "Bye, Mrs. Kent."

Clark grabbed her hand one last time and kissed her on the forehead. "Love you Mom." Lois then grabbed his arm and they limped off to the truck.

They entered the front door to the Kent family household and Lois began to run the steps. She called over her shoulder, "I'm going to go get a shower!"

Chloe called after her, "Lois save me some hot water please!"

Lois turned at the top stair and smiled. "I'll try."

Chloe glared at her, "Lois..."

She shook her head, "Tryings all I got here. Sorry!" And she proceeded into the bathroom.

Chloe looked at Clark and he smiled, "She worries me."

She stilled has his arm over her shoulder and she looked around the house. "So where to Clark?"

He looked to the couch, "How about the couch?"

She recollected the hours earlier. "It's covered in blood."

He looked at her brightly, "The kitchen table it is!"

Chloe helped him sit down and made sure he could hold himself up in the chair before walking over to the fridge. She turned and looked at him, "You want some coffee?"

He shook his head, "No. Water would be nice."

She giggled, "Oh yeah, you've got to get healthy again. No coffee for you Mr." She turned again while filling the glass to watch him smile.

He reached out and took the glass from her and sipped it allowing the cool water to quench his thirst. "Yeah." He began to run his finger around the glass.

Chloe noticed the distant look in his eyes as she sat down as the table beside him. "Clark? Something on your mind?"

He snapped out of it and looked at her with a smile. "Yeah actually, there is. I think I want to tell Lois my secret. Tonight."

Chloe spit her water all over him and some of it ran down her nose. She grabbed some napkins and helped him clean up. "Are you crazy?"

He put the napkins to his face. "Yes?" Chloe cocked her head. "Look I just don't want to go into a relationship lying to her."

Chloe smirked, "Relationship huh? Are you sure you want to tell her Clark? I mean just like an hour ago you said no way."

He looked at his water again. "No but I've got to take a chance on this Chloe. I think I love her." He laughed, "I know I love her. I've waited long enough."

"Clark those two years were not your fault."

"I still feel like I've wasted so much time though."

"Yeah I mean you being tortured and almost dieing, that is a waste of time if you ask me!"

He looked at her, he wasn't laughing. He couldn't laugh because it was true. To him, he felt weak for not being able to break free by himself. He knew that Chloe knew to. "Thanks Chloe."

"Don't thank my yet, nothings happened."

"You know what I mean."

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah. So are you going to tell me how Lana 'broke' you now?"

He looked up none to surprised. "You heard me and my mom talking? I guess that would be why Lois was asking about it."

He was avoiding, she knew him all to well. "Clark? What did she do?"

"The first week I was there, they tried to inject me with all kinds of serums, I just broke the needle with my skin. Lana told Lex she knew how to cut me. She ran outside and got a piece of Kryptonite and held it to my arm, she cut my skin with it. I don't know how they got me to stay in there all that time, I can't remember now. I just remember being cut and now being able to get free from the shackles. The next week they melted the Kryptonite down and they injected it into my brain at different places, just enough not to kill me. Lana tried to um...seduce me again and I refused so she um...permanently damaged the part of my brain that controls my...sexual...drive. It kicks on at the wrong times and stuff." He was twiddling his thumbs.

Chloe sat there with her mouth hanging open. "Holy crap. So you could get turned on at any time and you have no control? How embarrassing. Do you know if you can get the Kryptonite out?"

"I was hoping Lois could help me with that." He smiled and winked at her.

She slapped him arm playfully. "You're very dirty Clark."

Lois came down the stairs and yelled at Chloe, "I think you've got 10 minutes left of hot water."

Chloe bowed to her, "Thank you your highness for granting me that much."

"Hey shut up!" She snapped her towel at her and sat down beside Clark and kissed him on the lips as Chloe ran up stairs. "So Smallville what do you want to do now?"

He kissed her again on the lips and let out a small yawn. "Sleep sounds good. I've haven't slept in years!"

She looked at him worried. "How are you still alive?"

It had come down to this and it was time for Lois to know. He turned his head and looked straight into her eyes and kissed her one more time hoping it wouldn't be the last. If she accepted him they could go on to bed and sleep the night away, if she didn't he would have no where to go from here. "Your voice."

"My voice? What?"

"I listened to your prayers to me every night at 7:03 P.M."

She jumped off the chair and took a step back and started pacing. "How did you hear me?"

He let out a breath. "I have super hearing."

She looked at him and laughed hoping he was being sarcastic. "Ha ha you're so funny."

He shook his head. "I wasn't joking."

Still unconvinced she stepped towards him. "Can you prove it?"

He looked into her eyes again, "You're nervous."

She shook her head that wasn't the answer she was expecting. "What?"

"Your hearts beating faster than it normally does."

She put her hand on her chest and looked down towards her heart then back up to him, almost like he had invaded her privacy. "You can hear my heart beat?"

"Yes."

She shook her head and resumed pacing. "I thought you said you weren't a meteor freak."

He looked at her, she was losing it. "I'm not."

She stopped and threw her hands in the air. "Then how do you explain the power?"

He looked to the ceiling. "I'm not a meteor freak Lois...I'm just the reason there are meteor freaks." He looked back to her and she had stopped beside him. "When I was little I was sent here in the first meteor shower. I'm not a meteor freak, I'm an...alien." He looked at her and saw the fear flash in her eyes.

She stepped away from him and backed into the wall. "Oh so it makes it even better that you're the biggest freak of them all huh?"

His face dropped. He got up and walked towards her slowly and she kept scooting across the wall away from him. "Lois? You're scared of me?"

He grazed her arm and she screamed and ran across the room. "DON'T TOUCH ME FREAK!"

A tear fell from his eyes and with a sudden burst of energy he ran from the room.

Chloe came sprinting down the stairs, she heard the whole thing. "Where's Clark?" She looked on the counter and saw a note. Lois saw it to and ran over to it and read it. She put her hand over her mouth and fell to the floor as Chloe picked it from her hands and read it out loud.

"Lois,

I hope you find happiness with someone. I know you'll be able to love him, he won't be a 'freak' like me. I'm leaving, I'm not coming back, don't bother to look for me. Forget that you ever met me or that you saved my life. I won't. I'll always remember what I have lost.

I loved you,

Smallville

P.S. I took my bracelet back, you don't need it anymore."

"Lois! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!!!!" She ran through the open kitchen door and fell to her knees screaming at the open road, "CLARK! PLEASE DON'T DO THIS AGAIN! PLEASE!"

On the bus platform to Metropolis he looked back, he heard Chloe's screams but they went right through him. He no longer cared. People on the bus stared at him as he struggled to walk up the steps and find his seat. The immense pain running through his legs nearly blinded him. No blood could pump through his shattered heart. He looked at the bracelet one last time and stowed it away in his luggage. He would travel light to the place he hid before and hope his heart could mend. The walls grew stronger with every mile passed and the tears flowed down his face as he listened to Lois whisper, "Come back to me."


	7. Again

Chapter 7: Again

"Lois? What did you do to him?" Chloe screamed through her tears.

Lois looked up at her, no emotion could be described. "I called him a freak."

Chloe stood there stunned, she knew what Lois had said but it hurt worse to hear it in person. "LOIS!"

She laughed. "He deserved it."

Chloe slapped her across the face that was sure to leave a bruise. "You stupid idiot! How dare you say that about Clark?"

Lois couldn't even look at her as she put her head in her hands. "Is that even his real name Chloe?"

Chloe looked at her aghast, "Clark Kent is his earth name. Kal-el is his birth name. He doesn't want that name, he just wants to be Clark."

Lois looked around. "Kal-el? Wait a second. Who's Jor-el?"

"His father, who he hates."

"Is he on Earth?"

"No. He died with Clark's mother while they were trying to save his planet."

Lois laughed smugly. "Good we don't need anymore freaks walking around."

"Lois."

"Who cares Chloe?"

"The man you probably just killed." She pointed to the door.

She looked at Chloe. "Man? Ha. That's a joke."

Chloe looked at her hurt. "He's more human than all of us."

"Yeah and he made that possible to by bringing the meteor shower and turning this town into the place of walking freaks." She looked up and out the door. Visuals of Clark running through it came to her as she bit back the truth. She didn't mean any of what she said, she didn't know how to deal with him being gone again.

Another tear collected just below her eyes and she was having trouble finding a voice to speak. "Everyday Clark walks around with that burden on his shoulders and everyday he wishes that he would have never came here and cause all these people this pain. It wasn't his fault that any of this happened. The only thing that he has ever feared was that no one would love him or accept him. You just sealed his fate Lois."

"Why should I care?" She dropped her head between her hands, she was frustrated beyond belief.

She bent down to look into her face. "You care because you love him."

Lois streamed a few more tears from her eyes and looked up to Chloe with such pain. "I CANNOT LOVE A FREAK!"

Chloe wasn't fazed. "Really? Then why did you start crying when you read that note? Why are you crying now?"

"I'm being stupid. I have no reason to cry."

Chloe hit the floor from disbelief. "Have a nice life Lois. I hope you rot in hell for what you just did. No one deserves to be treated like that especially him. All he has ever done was try to help people. If anyone is the freak Lois..." She put her mouth to her ear and screamed, "IT'S YOU!!!" She ran out the door unable to control her sobs any longer, she had just lost her best friend again. The only thing she had wanted for the last 2 years was for him to be home and safe again, for him to be happy. Those things came true for one day and now he has nothing. Nothing to live for, nothing to bring him back again. She would find him before it became too late to bring him back from the edge once again.

She looked at the note that lay on the floor before her and picked it up. She read it again quickly as her tears began to smudge the ink, it was barely legible by the time she was through. She consciously rubbed her wrist where the bracelet had set only moments before, she felt unsafe and empty. She looked out the window behind her as she stood on her shaky legs. She watched the star she had always found comfort in flicker out and she fell to the floor yet again. It flickered back the second she turned away. "Come back to me." Was the only thing she wanted. She had hope, she only had hope.

He staggered out of the elevator. It had been 2 long months before when he opened that door again. He always knew that he would need this place again but he had no idea the reasons. He hadn't healed in the slightest since he left, he no longer had in his possession the only thing that could heal him. He suspected that he would go the rest of his life living with the aftermath of being trapped in that room. He made it to the door and leaned against the wall for support as he dug through his pockets for his keys.

This was a daily routine for him now. He would go out once a day and struggle down the street and go to his job. He had no car, he barely made enough money to eat but he was doing ok. He worked as an operator at the local phone company, answering questions and sitting all day then he went home and struggled to through his apartment to take a shower, eat and change his clothes.

He looked at his keys that were now in the door lock and turned them slowly. He was lonely. He didn't want to back to this home anymore. He wanted to go back home with him mom and Chloe, even Lois. He didn't even know if his mom had made it out of the hospital ok. He only hoped that everything would be ok again without him there.

He pushed as the door and stumbled forward into the vacant area. He looked around and noticed a small piece of paper lying on the table near the window. He opened it and read it to himself. "Turn around." His heart skipped a beat as he clutched hold of the table and fell to the ground with a familiar pain.

"So here we are again Kal."

Clark looked at the feet infront of him. "Kal?" He looked up and saw her face.

Chloe looked determined. "Where is the red k? Don't play with me! I'll hit you!"

He got scared. "Chloe there is no red k, it's me Clark!" he squeezed out.

She shook her head. "LIAR!" She began to swing at him and noticed him cover his head and cower in fear. She stopped her arm immediately and ran to the door throwing it out as hard as she could. She ran back over to him and helped him up onto the bed. "Sorry Clark. I had to make sure it was you."

He smiled a little. "It's ok Chloe." She hugged him tightly, wrapping her arms around his middle. "CHLOE YOU'RE HURTING ME!!! STOP!" She let him go with the word stop. He grabbed his ribs and limped over to the door and locked it.

She looked at him. "Why haven't you healed? It's been 2 months."

He answered simply. "Because the one thing that could heal me I no longer have."

Chloe knew in an instant what he was talking about and she really didn't want to go into the subject. "So same place as last time minus the red k?"

He smiled and let go of his ribs. "Yep. I already had this place paid for so I figured why not?"

She looked around the place and saw how bleak it was. It was all cold steel and stain blues, nothing friendly or inviting about it. "How are you doing up here?"

"Not the best in the world but it'll do for now."

"You have a job?"

He pointed out the window to a rather small building. "Yeah over there at the phone company."

"Car?"

"Nope I can't afford that payment."

She snickered, "Super speed better?"

He looked at her quizzically, "I don't have that anymore Chloe."

She crossed her arms, "How did you get out of the house and down here then?"

"It kicked in for 30 seconds. I made it to the bus station, bought a ticket and limped over here. How's my mom doing?"

Chloe shook her head, it was so like Clark to change the subject. "She's doing better," A smile lit up across him pale face. "She really misses you though."

Tears danced around his face uncontrollably. "I know I miss her too but I can't get home to visit. Not enough money or energy."

She noticed that he had began to shake and she put her hand on his leg. The shaking continued as he tried to cover it, his body couldn't keep warm anymore. "You do look pretty tired." His eyes where baggy and had a blackish tent to them.

"Yeah I lose more energy everyday. Oh well." His head started drooping, he was tired and wouldn't allow himself to sleep.

"What? Do you mean to tell me that you're dieing?" Chloe looked at him flabbergasted as she watched him attempt to lift his head to answer her. It was evident by his movements that he was barely able to breathe, but he kept on like it was nothing.

He shook his head and stared at the floor. "I guess I am. I really don't know anymore."

Tears silently trickled down her face as she watched him struggle to shift his legs. "You could always come home to me Clark. You could at least be with me and your mom again."

"I know that. I just don't want to." He looked at the clock avoiding her gaze. He took a shaky step towards the window and looked out to the sky. It was 7:03 P.M. Chloe started to say something but he silenced her with a motion from his hand. When Lois spoke to him nothing else existed, it was better for her to save it until later. She talked to him everyday since he left, he fell asleep every night barely hanging by her words.

"Hey Smallville. I know you can hear me. I know you're out there some where listening to me. You're probably thinking about that night again. I know you are because so am I. That is what we always think about. The day I broke your heart and the day you left again because I made you live your worst fears. Yep that's the day. Chloe left this morning to find you. She knows where you are but she won't tell me. We don't talk anymore. That's 2/3 for me. Your mom still talks to me sometimes. I can't mention you though. So yeah I'm guessing everyone hates me. I don't think you hate me though. I think you still care about me. Otherwise I wouldn't be able to look at this star and have it to let me know that you're still alive. Guess what? I'm looking at a picture of you. I keep it under my pillow. I miss you. Come home. I love you."

He looked down with the brightest smile that didn't go unnoticed by Chloe. She knew what was going on. He wiped the tears from his face and she just stared at him. Her gaze shifted to his hand and watched as he rubbed the bracelet she recognized from Lois's arm. "She shouldn't have said that to you Clark."

Still rubbing it and the smile never leaving his face he answered, "I know."

"You still love her?"

He snapped out of his trance slightly, "With everything I've got. She is the only thing that gets me through the day."

Chloe looked at him disappointed. "She is the reason you can't get better and come home to your mom and me but yet you still love her."

He looked her dead in the eyes. "Yes."

"Then why can't you come home?"

Tears began to seep through his eyes once again. It was no use to fight them, they won every time. "She hasn't given me the one thing I want yet."

"What is that?"

"Acceptance."

"And what if she never gives you that?"

He looked back up into the sky. "Then I'll die alone."

Chloe grabbed his arm, "Clark..." He sounded as though he meant, that scared her to death.

He roomed her arm and looked at her. "Chloe I know I'm teetering on the edge here and there is not that much holding me back. I'm no doctor but I know that. I can't just go home and forgive her like nothings wrong because the truth is everything is wrong. It's not my responsibility to fix it this time."

"But it is your responsibility to check in with me and your mom. We would appreciate an update now and then. No matter what has happened we still care and worry about you."

"I will Chloe."

"Can I visit you?"

"Yeah that would be nice. Come anytime you want."

"Good."

"Bye."

She got up and walked towards the door, cringing as she watched him limp slowly towards the bed, his body shaking and the pain evident in his posture. "Clark?"

He turned his head slightly. "Yeah?"

She took a deep breath, "You're going to have to face her again."

No smile plastered on his face, no sense of happiness only sadness, desperation and pain. "I know that."

Another tear slipped from her piercing green eyes and hit the floor. She watched her feet as she walked out and uttered her last words before leaving. "Don't let it be with your last breath." She watched him twinge a little to her words and she slumped out the door and headed back to her car.

She stepped up to the screen door and racked her fingers down the netting. She remembered all the time Clark had stood there thinking and wondering if life would ever be ok. She always thought he was a pessimistic person, now she herself was pessimistic too. She pulled at the handle and watched Mrs. Kent slide around the isle in the kitchen to get to her. "Chloe!"

"Hi Mrs. Kent." She said trying to hide the pain in her voice. How could she tell this woman who had been through so much already that her child might die, alone.

"Did you find him?" The hope yearning through her voice, her hands clapped together against her mouth with anticipation.

"Yeah. He is in that apartment he was in last time."

She frowned. "Red k?"

Chloe shook her head sadly, she wished it was red k. It would be so much easier to get him home. "No. Just Lois's bracelet." She laughed unhappily.

She took a step forward and grabbed her hands in hers and led her to the table in the dining room. "How is he?"

Chloe let her tears go again as Martha watched painfully. "He hasn't healed any. He is in no better condition then when he left. He said super speed kicked in for like 30 seconds, that's how he got to the bus station then to Metropolis." She sniffed and wiped her eyes a bit. She began to speak again barely above a whisper. "He looks awful. He told me he was...dying."

Martha jerked back and almost fell from her chair. "What? No. What can't he come home? Why can't he let us help?"

Chloe spoke again almost mockingly, "Because Lois won't give him the one thing he wants, acceptance."

Martha bit her lip. "I just want my baby back."

Chloe rubbed her hand. "I know. He said we could visit anytime...how about tomorrow?"

Martha's smiled became bright. "Yeah that sounds good."

Lois sat in the loft, starring at the picture of him. He was his normal brooding self, the one she missed so much. The one she had for almost 1 day and blew it, completely. She shouldn't have said the things she said to him, she knew that now but at that point she didn't know what else to say to him. She was hoping that by saying he was a freak he would open up more and help her to understand, at least that's what she told herself. She wouldn't let herself believe that at some point in her life she was disgusted with him, even hated him.

She didn't know how to apologize to him. She didn't know how to tell the man she loved that she wanted him to come home because she accepted him, that she even wanted to have his kids. That she wanted to find out every little thing that made him giggle, every part of his body that when kissed made him moan. She wanted to be there when he cried to wipe his tears and hold him. Every time he fell asleep she wanted to watch his muscles ripple with each breath. She wanted everything with him, but most of all she wanted to feel safe again. She didn't care if he ever forgave her or loved her again, she wanted that but she didn't have to have it. She just wanted her Smallville, nothing more or less.

She walked down the stairs and into the house, she hated walking through that door it only reminded her of him. She didn't know how a door could remind you of someone but this one did, every time she looked at it she picture him leaving. She decided closing her eyes would be better than remembering. She stopped in the kitchen only to watch Martha and Chloe give her evil looks from the dining room. She continued up the stairs to the bath room where she knelt over the toilet and retched away the rest of her lunch. She couldn't keep anything down since he left again. She trudged her way over to his bed and flopped down awaiting another painful nightmare.


	8. Heart

Chapter 8: Heart

She lay awake for the 60th time in two months. She could only think about Lois and what she had done to Clark. It no longer mattered in her mind that she had hurt him physically, at least she had accepted him and never once thought of him as freak, as Lois had. The thought of someone saying that infuriated her. She couldn't believe Clark could love some one like that.

But as she turned over and looked at the time, 12:51 AM, she remembered that at that moment Lex was pronounced dead. That at that very moment she knew Clark was free as was she. As stated in his will all his belongings were now her own. She sold most of it and donated a lot of the money to charities.

Lionel wasn't happy about her decisions but he accepted them. She didn't hear much from him anymore. When Mrs. Kent left the hospital to return home, he left for Africa, no one knows why. He left without a note or a none to better goodbye.

She never looked for Clark though, she knew in her heart she wasn't meant to find him. After all that had happened with her injected that meteor rock into his brain, she knew nothing would come out of her and him, not friendship or anything. She was afraid that he wouldn't be able to make love again because of all the things that. She prayed that he would never remember those first few weeks where she did the unthinkable. She bites her thumb nail with regret, it's chipped and broken like her heart and mind. She was nothing without him. She feared that every second she woke she took another second from his life. But yet again her mind traced it's way back to the main problem: Lois. Something had to be done; something permanent.

7:00 A.M. She awoke to the smell of freshly brewed coffee, the sound of bacon sizzling in a pan and to see the many stacks of bread and butter ready to be made into toast. It was the 1st time in 2 years and 2 months that Martha Kent was happy enough to make an actual meal. She even hummed a song with a happy tune. Her hair was fixed, make-up on and she even wore a splash of Jonathon's favorite perfume, something she hadn't worn since the day he died. Her complexion favored her radiance allowing her to glow as she bathed in the warm sunlight from the door inches away. She had a smile on her face that could light up the world, the moon and the stars.

Lois on the other hand was pale from the lack of nutrition and from her ever constant crying. The many sleepless nights were slowly tearing her apart as her vision was tinted and had a slight blur. Her eyes reflected a certain madness etched inside the many red veins, madness that only the truly heart broken could have. She had bruises on her wrist from the constant wanting of safety and the feeling of home. The scratches along her neck proved her constant struggle of life and death within her dreams as she tried to claw away the pain be stilled inside her blackening heart. The only thing that could pull her back she pushed away. She missed the simple smiles and laughs. The pretend hurts and every second jokes. The twinkle that flashed in his eyes that was only there because of her. She wondered if he ever noticed the things she did.

She tapped the floor with her shoe before taking the last step down making sure it wouldn't open the gates to hell and swallow her whole. It felt solid and she sighed. She was no longer the tough Lane her daddy had raised, she was broken and lost, needing Clark. Needing? Only Clark could make her need. She wasn't herself at all. She shifted her weight to the other foot and she was down.

Walking to the island she sat down at one of the seats around it, carefully checking it over for the same purposes only to have Mrs. Kent chuckle. "It won't bite you sweetheart, promise." She sat a plate and cup in front of her as she planted herself on to the stool. Lois, surprised, eyed the food warily before taking a small bite. After 2 years Martha Kent hadn't lost her touch. She ate greedily for it was delicious.

She looked up from the pan to look at the person hurriedly scratching her fork against the plate as she picked up the bacon and eggs. She smiled to herself as she placed her own plate in front of her and began to eat. "You're going to get choked if you don't slow down."

Lois stopped for a second and contemplated the hidden meaning written within her words. She resumed eating at the same pace. "Make it a quick death then. I'm tired of all this pain I'm enduring and have caused."

Martha dropped her fork and sorrowfully at the woman before her. She touched her hand and she immediately stopped again. "Nothing is going to make the pain stop."

Lois bit her lip and looked into her eyes. "Only one person can fix me."

She nodded her head. "He needs you just as much as you need him."

Lois shook her head and looked down at her empty plate. "I can't just go to him and hope he's forgotten. I know he hasn't. He won't."

"You love each other, you're going to find a way to be happy again."

Lois looked up in shock and jerked her hand out of grasp and rubbed it as if she was being scorned. "How can you say that to me? Don't you blame me for you never getting your son back? Don't you hate me?"

"Because I love you just as much as I do him. I could never hate you Lois, no matter what. We all make mistakes that we want to fix but we don't know how. It's a part of life and in the end we become stronger and more ready to stop the next mistake from happening." She wrapped her arms around Lois's shaking figure and they cried into the comfort that both had missed for so long.

Chloe stood in the kitchen, unnoticed by the grieving women before her. Despite her own hatred she managed to drop a tear and raise a smile. "She's right you know." She took a step forward as they jumped to the broken silence.

"CHLOE!" Lois got up and ran into her arms, nearly knocking her over in the process. They spun around simply enjoying something that had been lacked. When they finally let go Lois took both of their hands and just held them there, treasuring the moment with a smile. Now words could be used. It wasn't a reunion or an apology, it was simply breaking the barrier between them so everything could be rebuilt.

"Now that this is done, Mrs. Kent we need to be going." She said gesturing Mrs. Kent to the door.

Lois looked between them confuse as she felt some of the happy glow leave them. "What? Where are you going?"

Chloe stopped at the door unable to meet her clearly happy gaze. "To visit Clark."

Lois took a small step forward, her smile fading with each second that passed. The true reason for everyone hating her had just reared its head. She held out her hands as if expecting to grab Chloe's' but she quickly turned away. "Clark? You...you found him?"

They answer simultaneously. "Yes."

Her smile builds its way back. "Can I come with you?"

Again together, "No." They both give the answer firmly.

Mrs. Kent stepped in as she watched Lois look between them without expression. "He's not ready to see you yet."

She drops her head slightly. "Oh."

Chloe mocked Clarks own words. "Lois, it's your responsibility to fix it not his. He said it and meant it. But now is not the time."

Mrs. Kent turned back from the door again, "Lois honey, please don't follow us."

She dropped her hands and backed away to the counter where she sat numbly. They walked out the door with one last glance and were gone. She jumped up and looked around the room quickly and grabbed her keys. She drove away knowing her destination was only a few miles away.

Stopped at the county jail and entered the cell of a young woman huddled into a ball as her orange jumpsuit hung loosely off of her. Lois slowly approached her and sat on the bed beside her feet. She rolled over slowly, the surprise mixed with anger and happiness showed clearly through her eyes. "Hey Lois."

"Hi Lucy."

"I didn't think you would visit being as other people are on your mind. You and Clark dating yet?"

Lois looked into her eyes, the mood unreadable. "No Lucy." She dropped her head in disgust.

Lucy looked on aggravated and walked to the barred doors. "Did he leave because you called him a freak?" She turned back swiftly.

Lois looked up none too surprised. "Yeah, you've talked to Chloe."

Lucy hit the bars with her fist. "DUH!"

"And?"

She sighed angrily. "And what Lois?"

Lois ripped the sheet with her hands. "Don't you have something to say?"

Lucy started to pace. "Oh that. Well let's see. Me shooting Lex was in vain being as you have put him through just as much pain. You screwed up BIG TIME! Um...what else? You're a dumbass."

She bounced the back of her head against the gray cemented walls. "I know, I know."

"Now, how are you going to fix it?"

"I don't know he's not ready to see me yet."

She smacked her forehead. "He's trying to protect himself, obviously."

Lois put her head in her hands. "What do I do?"

Lucy walked over to her. "What will you do Lois?"

She looked up aghast. "You're not helping me?"

"Already did my share. I'm in jail remember?"

"Lucy..."

"You're fixing this, not me."

"I need help." Lois begged.

"Did you need help messing up? No. Chloe and Mrs. Kent are trying to keep him stable enough so he'll be able to see you. Now. You're the only one that can fix him, vice versa."

"But..."

"No. Fix it." Lucy pushed her out of the cell and slammed the door behind her.

"Chloe are you sure he's here?"

"Yeah he should be." She knocked on the door and heard something hit the floor not to far away. A few seconds later the door knob began to jiggle and the door peeped open. "I've got it Clark." Chloe took the knob and she heard the bed creak softly in the background. She turned to Mrs. Kent who was wanting in. She grabbed her hand and whispered to her. "Don't hug him too tightly...you'll hurt him." Smile still plastered to her face she nodded and pushed the door open walking inside and turning to look at Clark who was crumpled up on the bed.

She slowly walked over and turned to Chloe who looked worried through her smile. She took another step forward and sat on the edge of the bed. He flinched but didn't turn his head until he heard more footsteps. He turned and saw 2 women he loved so deeply that he couldn't physically acknowledge.

"Hi Clark." His mom said softly as she sat a shaky hand on his leg.

He smiled and she knew he could hear her. "Hi mom, hi Chloe." He sat up and leaned against the back of the bed. He continued to look around as if for someone else.

Chloe took another step forward and bit back her tears. "She's not here."

Clark didn't bother to look at her. He looked out the window saying, "Oh."

"We didn't think you were ready sweetheart."

"It's ok Mom. How are you?" He grabbed her hand and held it with every fiber in his being.

She looked down at it too afraid to squeeze it. "I'm lonely. I want my son back before he dies."

Clark looked to Chloe who had sat in front of him in a chair then back to his mom. He never once let go of her hand. "I'm sorry."

"I know baby."

"We both know."

"We also know that she's in just as bad of shape as you are."

"You need each other."

"I can't go home." His gaze returned to the window as a familiar beating entered his ears and caressed his soul.

"Clark please..."

"No mom. She's my soul mate. Don't you understand? I know she's hurting, I hear her cries every night. I hear her say that she loves me and that she wants me to come home. But I will not. I refuse to go home to a woman, even though I love her soo much, that doesn't accept the person I am!"

Chloe scooted closer. "Clark, she doesn't know..."

"Know what? What to say? How about, 'Clark I accept and love you and I always will.'? Hard enough?"

His mom looked at him in shock. "You are so hard headed."

He looked at her coldly and said the words that came to mind. "Kiss my ass."

She jumped off the bed. "CLARK JOSEPH!"

"No. Don't tell me I'm hard headed. You taught me to protect myself from all the people that don't accept me and that will hurt me. What do you think Lois has done?"

"That."

"Exactly."

"I think it is time to go Mrs. Kent."

"Clark please."

"No mom. My heart can't take that pain again."

"Bye then. I love you."

"Love you too, you too Chloe."

"Yeah."

They walked out and he turned his head back towards the sky, she was 6 hours early today. "Hey Smallville, Clark, Kal-el and anyone else you decide to be today. Did Chloe and Mrs. Kent make ti there ok? I sure do hope so. They won't answer their cell phones to me so I'm guessing they've left and are angry with me again. she laughs a bit, pain evident Old habits die hard I assume. I've been told that this is my mess to clean up. There's a problem though. I don't know how. I don't know that if I say it then you'll come home. I ass-Lana? What the hell are you doing here?"

Clarks focus changed and he could hear Lana breathing heavily right behind Lois, almost as if she was right beside him. "Your days of hurting Clark are over Lois. It ends...now!"

Clark heard the gun being pulled from her pocket and it being pushed to the ready position. He gripped the bracelet in his hand tightly, the blood squirting from his fingers onto the satin sheets. He heard Lois's scream and was torn from the inside out.

"CLARK!!! SAVE ME!!!" She had no time to move, no time to hit her only time to yell for the one she loved before it was too late.

He looked back up to the sky, the sun radiating into his window for the first time in days. The burning feeling he had felt before shot through his back and throughout his body. His eyes began to burn that furious red that reflected in every tear he was dropping. He felt every limb in his body gain strength, every muscle being rebuilt and all worry flee his mind. He stood with his mission planted in his soul and with a blink oh an eye he was gone.

She covered her face as she saw the trigger being pulled. Falling to the ground ready for the end of all the pains in her life she felt a wind blow her off balance. She looked up for one second and saw not Lana but Clark stand in front of her. She watched as he threw his hand in front of his face, catching the bullet in mid-air and viewing it with a new found pleasure. She could only imagine the rush of catching something so deadly. And with a swift move like lightning he walked across the room with his shoulders high and his head lowered. He took one step to Lana and she shied away from him attempting to run away. He caught her by the wrist and she hit the ground writhing in pain; he bent down and watched her amused as Lois could swear she heard her skin sizzling and see the steaming rising. He pulled her back up and forcibly jabbed his elbow at the bridge of her nose letting her go as she flew out of the loft and hit the floor below.

He turned and looked at Lois, his eye's more red than anything she had ever seen but yet his love for her shown through. She smiled but as soon as it came it was gone. He grabbed his throat and hit the floor on his knees gasping for breath. She ran over to him and caught him just in time as he began to lose consciousness. She laid his head out on her lap and caressed his hair gently as the red glow began to fade. His skin returned the pale color she recognized from months ago and he looked even frailer from then. He stirred slightly trying his best to bend his head into her hand and find solace in her touch. He wrapped his hand around hers and held it to his heart. He looked up at her barely awake and whispered, "My heart beats only for you...only for you." She dropped a tear on his nose and smiled as she kissed it away. He no longer winced to her touch, something she had been afraid of. She looked deep into his eyes and watched the worry begin to fade. Her smile was returned and he whispered again, "I love you."

"I accept you, and I'm going to do everything possible to take care of that beating heart of yours. You hear me? I love you despite it all. I hate not being with you."

He smiled again his own tears forming. "Don't leave me again."

"I won't."

"Never again?"

"Ever."

He turned his head and closed his eyes, finally finding peace in the only person that could give it to him.


	9. Damage

Chapter 9: Damage

He awoke at last to the sound of a muffled cry. He looked out in front of him to see Lex and Lana holds hands in an evil smirk. The familiar gleam in their eyes that he would never make it out alive. He felt familiar soft hands stroke his thinning body leaving a shaky aftermath across his nerves. He turned his head enlisting pain to surge throughout his body. He couldn't really remember the last time he has awakened to such pain.

The tenderness of the hands stopped at his navel and he jerked longing for the touch to stay but it was removed. He opened his eyes again to only find the owner of the hands burying her face deep inside a tissue and letting out a wail that could shake the world. The blonde streaked hair was pulled into a messy ponytail, her clothing none the better with rips and snags barely leaving anything to cover her skin.

He leaned in towards her, wanting only to wrap his arms around her and hold her forever, an eternity felt so short at this moment, but he was stopped short by a clanging that was burnt into his mind. His eyes sharpened and became more alert to his surroundings, the ones he had known for so long. He found the sickness begin to rise as the white became the green and as the dry became flooded against his face. The familiar burning of his muscles as he shook his arms and legs and they were unwilling to oblige to his commands.

The look upon her face when lifted was one he had never hoped to witness upon her face. It was a look of total grief dashed with a hidden thought of 'all is lost, nothing will ever be right again.' She looked into his eyes and began to pat away the smeared remains of the mascara she had applied only hours ago. Her eyes blood shot and hollow, like her heart. Her heart. The beating was irregular and uncharacteristic for her being. It was a different heart beat, one coated in release.

Release of what? Soon to be answered by a stifled laugh in unison from Lex and Lana who were fast approaching with a silver plated box. Lois looked upon it in utter disgust but she didn't refuse it nor did she completely acknowledge its existence now in her hands. She opened it slowly refusing to let him see the detested thing inside. She traced her fingers around it and glanced at Clark with more tears than possible for any normal circumstance. Her hand slowed to a stop and she wrapped her hand around it slowly as Lex and Lana cheered her on. She dropped the box to the ground and gnawed on her lip for dear life, what she was about to do was no excuse for her tears, no excuse for her emotions but it was an excuse to rid him of pain.

The gun glistened in her hand as she slowly ccked(I remember the o being blocked last time...figured I would go ahead and do it) it back and aimed it at his heart. Her outstretched arms shook and she closed her eyes. He looked at her and the only emotion he could contain was fear, the one escaped was love. She mouthed the words he never wanted her to speak with such a slow tenderness his knees burnt as they melted. "I love you. Only time will tell me if we will see each other again. This is the only way to make sure you get better...get better again." Another tear slipped from her naked eyes and hit her arm. She lifted her fingers slowly to the trigger and blew away every memory of love she would ever have known to exist.

"LOIS!!! NO!!! PLEASE!!! LOIS!!!" He grasped her knee for dear life, tearing his claws into her silken flesh. He clenched his jaw furiously trying to mellow out the pain his jerking was causing as the fear crept up his sides flowed from his promptly closed mouth.

She looked down purely stricken with fear as she felt her leg being ripped and heard the desperate cries coming from the man resting in her lap. She desperately pulled at his hands and got him sitting up, still grasping his hands for dear life. He kept his eyes shut tight as he frantically attempted to flail his arms out of her grasp. "NO PLEASE DON'T KILL ME LOIS!! PLEASE!! I'LL DO WHATEVER THEY WANT JUST PLEASE...PLEASE...please..." His breathing and voice slowed and became a whisper barely audible with her ears.

He listened to his surroundings, quite, eerily quiet. He was dead. She has killed him to save him. He still felt pain, why was he in pain? Why was there two hands wrapped around his wrists restraining him from moving? He kept his eyes shut for fear of waking to a different reality, where his dream had killed him and the blood trickled from his permanently broken body.

She looked at him afraid, pain clearly evident in his avoidance of opening his eyes. She eased her hands off from around his wrists and they fell to the ground with a hollow thud. She gently placed her hand on his face and he didn't acknowledge, so she spoke to gain his sleeping figures trust. "Clark. I'm right here. You're alive. I'm not going to kill you."

"I'm dead."

"No. No you're very much alive."

"I'm in heaven aren't I? That's why you're here Lois...you came to bring me home." A smile crept upon his shaken face. It was a loving smile, one she had seen only minutes ago.

"You're right here with me. We're in the loft Clark. You're dreaming."

He shook his head from side to side. "No."

"You're dreaming."

"I don't want to wake up."

"Why? I'm here. I love you."

"You don't want me."

"I want you with all my heart."

"I can't be who you want...you don't want an alien."

Her hand dropped from his face and she plastered it to her heart. She could swear she could feel it explode from the weight she had put on it. She took in a sharp breath and bent to his ear and whispered "I want this alien. I love this alien. I accept this alien." She kissed his neck and he barely gave a response. "I love Clark Kent, Kal-el. I love you no matter who you are."

She bent her head back and watched his eyelids flicker open. His smile brightened the barn as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her in to a hug. She accepted him, grateful for his wake and grateful for the love pouring from his heart towards her. She knew he would never love another as he loved her and vice versa.

When they finally retreated from the hug they simply looked into each others eyes. One member was full of love and the other was full of pure joy. He leaned in slightly looked to her lips as she gazed upon his but instead he just rested his head back into her lap, he wasn't ready to kiss her again, not after what happened last time he did. She felt slight disappointment that she couldn't kiss him as desired but she knew they weren't ready to go back to that place yet. But she also knew that eventually they would be.

Chloe and Mrs. Kent found their way up the stairs of the loft when they heard a familiar scream only to hear the voice of Lois comforting it. At the top they were surprised to find Clark asleep in Lois's arms, something they never thought they would see in this life time. Lois looked to them, she had heard them pull up before Clark began to scream but she decided against moving him and leaving him, knowing that if he woke up without her he would freak. Lois put her finger to her mouth and made sure they were quiet as they huddled around them.

Slowly the three lifted Clark and packed him back into the house and up to his room. Lois looked around after they sat him down and decided to sit outside his door so she could talk to Mrs. Kent and Chloe. But as soon as they walked out and Lois had closed the door, Lois's back hit the door and her tears began to flow.

Mrs. Kent looked at her worried. "It's alright baby. He's home. It's going to get better again."

Lois put her hand to her mouth. "I know that. I just can't believe this is real."

Chloe put her hand on her shoulder. "But it is real. And you better not screw it up this time."

All three women let out an uncomfortable laugh. Lois looked up and suddenly a thought popped into her head. "Where's Lana?"

Mrs. Kent looked at her confused. "Lana? I haven't seen Lana."

Lois's eyes widened in horror. "No. Clark...Lana was knocked out in the barn...the barn." Lois took off running into the barn and found in the midst of a puddle of blood a note.

"Lois,

It's not over. You can not have the one you've broken, he's meant to be mine. Watch every corner, and every new person you meet. Be prepared to die.

Lana."

Chloe looked over her shoulder and read the note to herself. She watched Lois begin to shake and run her fist through a wooden post as she cried out in anger. The only thing to do was wait for her to calm down other wise someone would get hurt.

She hit the floor on her knees and looked to Chloe and Mrs. Kent. "She's going to find a way to kill me...and win Clark back."


	10. Small Steps

Chapter 10: Small Steps

She paced around the barn, mumbling curse words under her breath, mad as a hornet. The 2 women behind her stood watching, afraid if they made a move they would get hit. They stood at a safe distance. "THAT WORTHLESS BIT!" She smashed her fist into another post and splintered it.

Martha screamed in surprise and grabbed her hands. "LOIS! Stop this. The barn is in bad enough shape as is."

Lois didn't even flinch as she walked straight out the door and up to Clark's room. She hesitated as she reached for the doorknob and placed her head against the door. She hated feeling torn like she did. She loved him but she feared that he would never get better, something that would hinder his thoughts and emotions for the rest of his life. He wouldn't be the same man as she loved now but she would always love him no matter what, she knew that now. 'Turn the knob Lane. Do it. He needs you.' She let out a deep breath, it wasn't reassuring but it gave her that push to turn the knob and step inside.

She found him lying on his back, starring out the window wide awake, clutching something in his hand. She took a step forward and he slid it under himself. He wasn't ready to return it to her yet. She shook her head and walked towards him sitting in the chair beside the bed right beside him. She pulled her hands to her face as if in prayer then wiped away her tears. Her weaknesses fade when he is near. He made her strong, she had always known that.

She shook quickly and felt the familiar tingle appear in her heart as his eyes shifted to hers. Hate crossed her mind as she saw the light reflect upon the scars that now colored his once perfect face. It was still perfect in her eyes. But every time she looked at him she couldn't help but remember the old him that was hidden inside of his sole. The one that cried out for her touch, the one he wouldn't show her because he didn't want to relieve everything that happened just yet. But she knew in time the Smallville she has always known and still loves will come back, if only for a little while.

His stare consumed her, a deep sea of green and blue flecked with love and secrets. Secretly broken and secretly scarred and scared, fears and lies. But in front of all that there was his love for her, something that wasn't as pure as it used to be. It was incomplete since no solid ground had been laid for him to get back to her. It was slowly rebuilding with every second that ticked by. A smile crept upon his face, those beautiful dimples showed within his overly defined cheeks, ones that she longed to run her hand across.

He pushed at his arms and gritted his face as he bore the pain of simply sitting up. 'I'll withstand it for now. I have to see her beauty again, through tears and all.' He watched her shake and cry, cup her face then rub her arms, look at him with a glimmer of hope. He knew she always had hope. He watched her stand and walk over to him then sit down on the bed beside as her cries grew stronger and her shaking increased. He was forced to watch her every movement his heart not letting him turn away. 'You love her , you save her.'

Her only pain was her aching for his touch that sense of safety she had always wanted from him. Her fears over came her, she knew if she kissed him or hugged him or touched him she could hurt him. She pushed her legs under the covers and mirrored his position.

"What happened to the strong Lois Lane?" He asked looking into her eyes.

She smiled at him. "She feel in love."

Clark raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Who's the lucky guy?"

Her face drooped slightly. "I wouldn't call him lucky. I kinda hurt him. I said something that I shouldn't have. He didn't deserve it."

"Do you regret it?"

She felt the tears coming again. "With everything I am. See, I'm the reason he left and wouldn't come home. Now he's come back again, I just don't know what to do. I don't think he loves me anymore."

She lowered her head to her hands and began to cry as Clark sat there and watched. He wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around her and whisper in her ear that everything would be ok that he still loved her but he couldn't. He couldn't move his arms and he didn't have the courage to say that he loved her, that he always had and always will. This was killing him.

"He still loves you. He's probably just really hurt right now and feels lonely, just like you. Maybe he's not ready to just jump into things just yet." She looked up with a smile his heart lightened a bit.

She raised her hand to his face but stopped when she saw the scars again and pulled it away. "I really missed you."

He knew she wanted to hold him but he couldn't bare the pain. He knew most of his bones were still very frail and even with a slight touch they might break. "I missed you too."

"I'm sorry."

"I know I listened." He turned his head back to the star.

"I don't know what to say to you..."

"Then don't say anything."

She watched him for a minute. "Clark?"

"Yeah?"

"Will we ever get back to where we were?"

"I don't know. I hope so."

Another bout of silence. "Smallville?"

He chuckled at hearing his name. He missed it so much. "Yes?"

"You mind if I sleep in here tonight?"

He turned his head and faced her giving his sternest face he could muster without laughing. "Yes. You get the couch."

She rolled her eyes. "So funny."

He dropped his expression to a smile, "I try." With Lois' help they both slid down into the covers and were nodding off to sleep when 2 hours later..."Lois...pst...Lois.." He said quietly...he couldn't nudge her arm.

She rolled over a little. "Hm...what?"

"I can't get up."

She looked at him like he was crazy. "Clark. You're hurt remember? You kinda can't move your legs very well..."

"Lois I need to get up."

"Why?"

He whispered even softer. "I've got to go to the restroom."

A HUGE smile spread across her face. "AW!!! Clarkie gotta go tinkle!"

He laughed sarcastically. "If you don't hurry up it's going to bed in the bed and you'll be cleaning it."

A quick image of cleaning ran through her mind and she was up and running to his side of the bed. She put him on her back and began to pack him down the hall the entire time he was making his own little commentary. "You're slow." "Come on! FASTER!" "Turtle." "TORTUIOSE" "I could go faster than this."

She giggled a little, at least he was happy now. "Yes you could but remember Smallville I can do things to you now. Be warned." He smiled, she was coming back to him.

She sat him down carefully on his feet and pulled his arm around her neck. She reminisced on a time very similar to this such a while ago. She put one of her feet forward as he struggled to life his legs. Once they got moving he was fine but otherwise he had to pull at her desperately.

10 steps later they had made it in the door, shut it and were looking from the toilet to Clark's crotch wondering how exactly this was going to work.

"Yeah..." Clark said, Lois's arm still around his neck.

"Hm."

"I can't move my arms very well."

"Meaning I get to see you naked again."

He looked down towards her unnerved. "Right."

That didn't ease her conscious. "And I get to hold him?" She motioned to his crotch.

"Yep." The idea bothered him but he knew that nothing outSTANDING would happen.

Lois smiled warily. "My lucky day."

He leaned against the counter once again. 'This feels familiar.' Slowly he began to work his pants down as Lois watched his every move, ready for the surprise inside. Well...it was a surprise every time. Once he got his pants down far enough he reached inside of the flap of his boxers, loving the Lois's eyes were following his hand. He had an idea. He slowly pulled his hand back out. "I can't grab it, I can't cup my hand."

He watched Lois blush completely as she took a step forward and looked from her hand to his boxers. "No longer fun. This is embarrassing."

"Lois! I gotta go!"

"Alright. Alright." She took two fingers from one hand and pulled open the fabric while the other slid inside. She closed her eyes when she felt him and looked up to his face. It was pure laughter trying to be hidden. She crawled her fingers over him and gently pulled him out. He watched her eyes: a mixture of sadness and shock as she found him limp again. She placed one hand on his back at aimed him at the toilet.

"You're right this is now longer fun, it's awkward."

"I'm the one holding you. Go already." And he did...forever. In his mind those hormones were raging around but Jr. on the other hand, Lois's, remained limp with no intention of changing status.

Time to lighten the mood a little. "You have good aim Lois, done this before?"

"SHUT UP!" And he was done. She discovered that toiler paper was fast and so were he pulled up pants and boxers at the same time skills. She couldn't believe she just held him like that and nothing happened. She was desperately trying to calm herself while he on the other hand was perfectly composed. She only hoped it wasn't permanent, she smiled at the things she wanted to do to him when he got better.

She helped him walk out the door and offered to pack him back to bed. He refused. "Clark it's the middle of the night."

"I want to try."

"Clark please."

"Lois just a few steps."

"Are you sure?"

"I want to try."

'God he's hard headed.' "Alright. Here is my hand." She slipped her hand in his. "If you feel like you can't take another step then just squeeze it ok?"

He nodded. He lifted one leg slowly and slipped it in front of the other. Once his foot was planted Lois watched as he tried to move the other one and failed. He couldn't bend his knees to cushion the impact and there were hardly any muscles there that would allow him to move. He was determined to make just two steps, just two. He looked to Lois for support and she only gave him a look of pity. His anger flared.

"Don't say it Lois." He was still trying to push his leg farther.

"Clark...maybe we should stop."

He shook his head slowly still concentration on his legs moving. "2 steps."

"Clark you can't move. We should stop."

"No."

"Clark I don't want you to get hurt again."

"2 steps. I have to make two steps." He slowly lifted his leg and began to bend his back backwards so she placed a hand behind him causing him to immediately straighten up. His leg shook as he pushed it. He had almost reached the ground when they heard a weird pop. Lois looked to his face which was paralyzed with fear and pain. He desperately squeezed her hand and she grabbed him. He fell into her arms crying out in pain.

Mrs. Kent and Chloe came running from down stairs.

Chloe helped hold him up, "Oh God is he ok?"

Mrs. Kent stood in front of them, "Clark are you alright? Lois what happened?"

"He was trying to walk when we heard a pop."

Chloe looked at Lois. "Pop?"

"What was it?" Mrs. Kent asked worriedly.

Faintly beside them they heard Clark whisper, "Lois..."

She looked at him his eyes were squeezed shut. "Huh?"

Mrs. Kent walked up slowly, "What's wrong baby?"

"My leg..."

They sat him down on the floor and Lois watched his face while keeping his hand in hers as they looked over his leg.

"Oh God...Chloe." She heard Mrs. Kent whisper.

"How did that get there?"

"I don't know."

Lois looked over to where they were leaned over. "What's wrong?"

"There's kryptonite coming out of his pores on his leg right there." She pointed at where his hip and leg meet.

His hand squeezed around hers, "It'll stop in a minute."

Chloe jerked her head around in surprise. "WHAT?"

Mrs. Kent bent forward towards it and examined it more closely. "Has this happened before?"

"Yes. Just wait." And wait they did. Soon the green turned to crimson and was clotted to a stop.

"Why did that happen?"

"I want to go to bed." He looked towards his bed room door.

Chloe rubbed his arm. "Clark you need..."

Lois smacked her hand away. "He's tired Mrs. Kent, Chloe. I'm taking him to bed, goodnight." She pulled his arms around her neck and lifted him over her back. He winced but knew he could withstand the pain for a little while. She walked with confidence as Chloe and Martha starred in awe. Martha suddenly turned her head realizing something.

"Chloe?"

"Yeah?"

"Why aren't you telling me everything that happened?"

Chloe closed her eyes remembering everything suddenly. "Hu...ok." They walked down the stairs.

Lois walked in the room and sat him down on the bed where he fell backwards immediately unable to hold himself up. He grunted as she pulled him up to his pillow. He was hating every second.

"Clark get over it. You're going to have to have help now."

"Good night Lois."

"OH PLEASE!" Lois watched as the shadows of the night danced across his face. She was only met with silence. "Clark?" He had rolled his head over and was looking to the stars. "You can't avoid me."

"I can try."

"I can see that." She sat down on the bed beside him and yet again slid her legs under the covers but this time she made sure to run one foot down his leg before finding a comfortable position. "Clark I'm not trying to hurt you again."

He took in a shaky breath. "I know. It's just hard remembering that I used to get around this farm in the blink of an eye and now I can barely move. It's tearing at my soul." She rubbed his arm and pulled it close to her making sure she wasn't crossing too many boundaries or hurting him.

"Just think about getting better. And once you are you'll be faster and stronger." He turned to look at her with a smile. His fingers raked across her leg where she held them. She slid her hand down and held his as he attempted to squeeze it.

"She coming back." He said in a serious yet loving tone.

Lois looked up at him disappointed, thinking he heard Chloe or his mom. "Who?"

"That Lois Lane girl I used to know."

She blushed amidst the dark room and kissed the tip of his nose. He pulled back a little, it was too much for one night but he would let it slip, just this once. "Night Smallville."

"Night Lois."

They both fell into a deep sleep, both sharing the bed with a distance of body but a closeness of heart.

"So she injected him with Kryptonite?" Mrs. Kent asked with a small gasp.

"Yeah." She took another bite of toast as she glanced around the room. ok I know what you're thinking, a long time ago I said that Clark told her everything. He just said that his stuff didn't work so this is news to mrs kent.

Mrs. Kent watched her closely. "What's wrong?"

"He had to of left something out. He knows why he still cares for Lana but he won't tell me."

"Give him time sweetie. We just now got him back."

Chloe looked up, Mrs. Kent's eyes didn't reflect her smile. "How are you doing?"

"Better. SO much better. I'm so glad my son is home."

"What about Lionel?"

She ran a hand through her hair. 'What about him?"

"Why hasn't he come home? Why did he leave in the first place?"

She turned her head away from Chloe as the tears built up in her eyes. "He left to um...do research."

"Mrs. Kent?"

"He knew about Clark. He was funding the entire thing. He told Lana and Lex about him. He visited me in the hospital and told me. He asked if I still loved him." She shook her head and Chloe rubbed her arm. "I told him it would be better if he left. Then I asked him if Clark knew. He said no, but I can't help but think he lied about that too."

"I didn't know. God. I'm so sorry."

"I keep seeing Jonathon in my dreams. He tells me it's not my fault and that everything will be ok again, it will be. Clark is home and he'll get better. Him and Lois will patch things up." She looked a Chloe with a true smile. "OH! Have you told them yet?"

Chloe pulled her hand from her pocket and smiled as the ring glistened. "No. But I will. I'm just going to wait." They both looked up to the ceiling.

"Let's go check on them."

"Yeah. I don't think Lois will leave him side ever again." They giggled and went up the stairs. They turned the knob slowly and peeped in to see them both asleep facing each together but with a space in-between. They shut the door again.

"Well at least they are taking this slowly."

"Yeah. We should head on to bed too." They walked to their beds and were asleep at contact.

Clark dun dun dun dun...NC-17

He walked down a set of stairs he's never seen before noticing that nothing on him hurt. He stretched his out watching his bulking muscles twinge and tighten. It was a great feeling.

As he reached the bottom stair he felt a soft pair of hands slip around his waist and caress his stomach, slowly working their way down to his pants. "Checking yourself out Smallville?" He relaxed into her arms as she kissed a spot on his neck that made him moan fiercely. She blew into his ear before sucking on it eliciting more moans.

He turned his head and looked into her eyes, they conveyed an amount of lust indescribable with words. He grabbed her hands and placed them around his neck as he pulled her in to a passionate kiss, one that begged for something more. He pulled back to let her breathe and attacked her neck, she began to pull at the hem of his shirt. He snapped out of his trance and pulled out of her reach while she gave him a questioning look. He pulled his hands to his face in frustration and let out a breath.

"This isn't real."

She wrapped her arms around his waist and let her hazel penetrate his blue. "Yes it is. Why wouldn't it be?"

She led a trail along his neck with her tongue. He tried so hard to resist the temptation of taking her but she was pushing him over a very steep edge. He felt her hand leave his shoulder and slide down his body. Her fingers pressing in all the right places making it hard for him to stand.

She grazed across his groin, his breath hitched and his eyes fluttered; she then began to trace him. She pulled him back into another kiss, sucking on his lip making his mouth open and their tongues do a dance of control. She gripped his butt tightly squeezing and grinding painfully slow. He pulled her in closer and her hips bucked into his: they needed the same thing.

She looked once again into his eyes while she slid her hand under his pants and boxers. Gnawing on her lip she watched his eyes flutter again and felt him jerk inside her hand begging for the movement needed for release. She ran her thumb over his head and he attacked her lips with bruising impatient. He unhooked her bra under her shirt then ripped them off her back, she let out of soft whimper that sent thousands of chills running through his spine.

She pushed him back onto the couch and watched his look at her angrily because she let him go. She dropped her hands that were holding up the fabric and his look changed back to lust. His eyes drifted below hers as the twins made an appearance. He growled hungrily as she slowly walked over to him and straddled him. He winced slightly to her touch as Jr. desperately wanted out.

His hands slid up her firm tan stomach and over her delicate curves. She fit perfectly in the palms of his hands as he squeezed as kneaded. She ran her hand over his shirt. "This has to go." With a devilish smile she ripped his and discarded it to the floor. He let her go long enough to pull her face down and kiss her forcefully. Within seconds she began to move her hips in small circles making him even more painfully hard. He grabbed her waist forcing her to stop, he couldn't handle much more.

She smiled onto his lips as he placed his hands on her zipper. He looked into her eyes as he pulled it down, purposely slipping a finger inside to feel the extent of her heat. Her body shook gratefully onto of his. She stood and pulled them off along with her underwear. She place her hands on his pants and pulled them down swiftly dragging his boxers along for the ride. The second the fabric was removed Jr. made his appearance, standing incredibly tall. She sat down on his thighs right behind and pumped him into an erratic state of mind.

He grabbed her and pulled her over him, eagerly thrusting himself inside then allowing her time to adjust. Minutes passed with no movement and he looked into the face of Lana Lang, one with a sick and twisted smile as she absorbed him naked, beads of sweat traveling down her as if she was the one he was with the entire time. She ran her hands across his chest and scratched at the skin as she bent over and whispered in his ear.

"You'll never be free. I'll kill them all before you just to make you cry, just to watch to twinge in fear." She slid up and down him watching his eyes widen in horror as his penis began to ooze blood. He couldn't stop the drowning feeling as everything turned green and he blacked out.

Lois

She typed her last sentence and hit the enter key before saving her work. 'LEX LUTHOR: WHAT YOU DIDN'T KNOW', it was the story of a lifetime. She closed her laptop and watched as an image ran across the window, one from the night before.

He stood in her doorway as she 'thanked' Oliver for giving her a ride home. She turned and saw him, saw his body shaking. She saw those tears streaking down his face, she saw the mud caked on his body from God knows where. She saw the hurt, pain and desperation in his eyes.

She remembers standing from Oliver's lap walking towards him as a sense of fear shadowed her body. He looked at her and took a shaky step back. "I'm sorry if I'm interrupting. I just came to look for a friend but I'll go. I'll just go." He turned and walked away as Lois ran to the door. He was gone.

Like a ghost there was no sign of anyone seeing him that night or that morning. She broke it off with Oliver when she came back in, she was unable to be with him when she really wanted Clark. When all her thoughts were about Clark, when everything was about Clark.

She blinked and looked at the time: 2:00 P.M. He's going to come home she kept telling herself. He's going to be alright and I'll apologize for everything.

Chloe was a wreak and so was Mrs. Kent, they had looked for him all night. Lois knew no matter what they said they blamed her for the whole thing. She HATED herself for it.

She chewed on her pen tearing her gaze away from the window long enough to hear a loud beating against her door. She drug her feet as she walked and pulled the door open wide enough only so one eye could see out but she it opened it more to her surprise when she found Lana Lang standing on the other side.

"Hi Lana. This is weird...why are you.." Her question was cut short as her hand flew up to her throat and she was pinned against the wall. Her throat was being squeezed so tightly barely any air was flowing in. She watched Lana's smile become more of a tormenting tone as she flailed her arms out to knock her away.

Lana pinned her arms to her side with one hand, leaned forward and whispered in her ear. "You'll never be free. I'll kill them all before you just to make you cry, just to watch to twinge in fear." She let go of her hands and wrapped her fingers around her throat with the other one. Lois dropped a tear as she felt blood drip from her mouth and nose. Her only thoughts left drifted to Clark. 'I've failed you.' She closed her eyes a final time and blacked out.

Martha

She held on to their hands, both pulling towards different paths, both seeming right. A smile on each face and a familiar atmosphere of strength. Both were lost and didn't have her anymore. One dead and one betrayed her. In front of her she could see the broken heart of her son, his face imprinted across its jagged edges.

She only wanted to be happy but she knew Clark would never forgive her for dating Lionel. Both hands slip away and the smiles fade as the heart before her mends. Lois appears beside it and wraps her arms around it protectively. She pulls it away from Martha. "You're going to hurt him." She whispers and she strokes her hand around it.

"No I love my son."

"You love Lionel more. How can you?" Her face begins to contort slightly and a different voice exits her mouth. "You'll never be free. I'll kill them all before you just to watch you cry, just to watch you twinge in fear."

The heart she was holding blackened in her arms and fell to the ground crumbling into dust. Martha ran to it pulling at the ashes desperately as they fell through her fingers. She looked up to Lana and everything turned black. She fell into the ashes as she blacked out.

Chloe

"Jimmy! Jimmy! Hi!" She stretched out her arms and he turned away with an exhausted whimper. "Jimmy? You alright?"

"Go home Chloe."

She looked around confused. "I am home. Our home."

He turned around and looked at her as a tear escaped. "Our home? This was never our home. This is MY home. You made that clear."

"What? Jimmy I love you. What are you talking about?"

"Oh nothing. Nothing as usual."

"Jimmy, what happened? Why are you acting like this?"

He smacked her across the face. "You cheat on me with him and you think nothing is wrong? You're a piece of work Chloe. I think sex crossed a few boundaries."

"Jimmy.."

"No."

"I would never do that to you. I love you remember? We're engaged!" She held up her hand and noticed the ring missing. She eyed her hand carefully at the place on her hand that now felt hollow.

"You should have thought about that when you were on top of him screaming his name." He pointed to the door and ushered her out.

She reached for his hand. "Jimmy please..."

"No. You never got over him. You lied to me all this time. You and Clark have a good life." He slammed the door in her face.

"Clark?" She whispered unable to comprehend the words he said.

"Yes Chloe." Lois said from behind her. "You did Clark and now you are paying for it."

She shook her head. "No. I never did that. You love him. Not me. No."

Lois looked down at her an evil glare danced in her eyes. "I loved him but it wasn't his choice of what happened, that was all you. Clark's dead because of you. Who knew sex wouldn't kill you but instead kill him? Hm. I guess aliens are weird."

"Alien? How did you know that?"

"In a fit of guilt you told me. Then you came here. You brain dead over there?"

They heard a soft clicking coming from behind and both turned to the voice. "Go home Chloe."

"Lana?"

Lana dropped her head slightly but in one swift move she slammed Chloe's head against the brick wall. "You'll never be free. I'll kill them all before you just to watch you cry, just to watch you twinge in fear." A warm rush swept through her body at the point of impact and she blacked out.

Dream sequences over

All awaken at the same time to the same ending and the same fears: losing the ones they love the most and dieing to the hands of Lana Lang. Not because Lana scared them, they were all afraid of what would happen to the others.

Clark fell off on to the floor and Lois screamed in horror. Mrs. Kent ripped away her sheets and Chloe flipped off the back of the couch. All ran to Clark's side as he scratched at his skin. Pulling at his face, ripping at his chest and hugging himself to shred his back. Lois lunging at him trying to grab his arms as he hit her to push her away.

Blow for blow, he was trying to get her away from him, she kept coming back. He picked a wrong time for his strength to return. She smacked against the floor, her face bleeding and bruised. She couldn't get him to stop of small hunks of skin descended to the floor.

"CLARK!" Chloe screamed from behind Lois.

Lois jumped on top of him and pushed him to the ground. He flung her across the room with ease, his eyes closed tightly as he faced an inner demon. Her back hit against the wall, the plaster could be heard cracking.

"GET OUT!" He screamed as he tore more and more away. "OUT!"

Lois stood once more and slugged him across the face hoping that would snap him out of this trance. He reacted to the hit as blood spewed from his mouth. He kicked away her legs and she slammed onto the floor. She grabbed his neck and flipped him over her, once again pinning him to the ground.

"IT HURTS!" He screamed as he tried yet again to push her away, her hands wrapped around his neck trying to knock him out. He pulled desperately at her hands and ripped them away. He elbowed her in the stomach, grabbing her hair and twisted her off of him. She rolled over once again and watched, shocked, as he dug his nails into his scalp.

"STOP! PLEASE STOP!" He begged and scratched.

She crawled over to him but didn't touch him. She listened for a moment and heard what she was waiting for. The same familiar 'pop' from the hallway came and she punched him directly in the heart. He fell back onto the floor and she lifted him back onto the bed. He shook violently when he grazed across the covers and Lois fell backwards.

She could only watch as his mind fought his body's control. His eyes stayed shut and unmoved as the rest of him went into an almost epileptic shock. The tearing of skin was heard, the ripping felt by all and the smell of blood feared the witnesses. Chloe and Martha grabbed him and held him down. Lois buried her face in her hands trying to think of something to make his pain stop. "STOP!" Mrs. Kent and Chloe looked up from their struggling patient.

"What?"

"Let him go." They gave her another skeptical look and did as told. Within seconds the shaking increased but the blood stopped flowing, a good sign she supposed.

They all watched him carefully as the shaking decreased, all were surprised by his next action. He jumped straight up from the bed and ran from the room. He reached his destination just in time. He emptied his soul into the porcelain below knowing 3 women watched just outside and one more than all shook from his echoing pain.

The green fluid poured from his mouth, glowing as it left leaving it hard for him to hold on to anything to keep him self from falling in. It exited uncontrollably searing his taste buds and burning his throat. It left his mind and his heart flaming. The memories of why this was happening coursed through each vain and caught themselves in his throat, but they wouldn't stay for long as they were lost amongst the water.

The mucus poured from his nose and he was unable to breathe. Mrs. Kent grabbed some napkins as he gagged and wiped him off carefully. Lois wet a wash rag and wiped him down trying to get his temperature down though she didn't think it would help.

He turned his eyes to Chloe who stood in the open doorway grasping a familiar object in her hand. He blinked and she took off running down the hallway. "No." He whispered. Neither women heard him, both were trying to get him cleaned up. Both were choking on their own tears, they knew why his eyes never left the doorway. Lois told herself that Chloe would do whatever it took to save him. Mrs. Kent knew that no one could stop her.

"I didn't want it to come to this but it has. Jor-el, Clark needs your help and I'm willing to do anything for him. Please, save him."


	11. Chloe's Sacrifice

Chapter 11: Chloe's Sacrifice

"Chloe Sullivan, what is it you ask of me?" The voice boomed throughout the ice, shattering the moments held within them.

"Save your son." Her eyes begged and her mouth pleaded.

"It is not that simple."

"I know that." She responded simply.

"Then what do you ask of me Chloe Sullivan?" The question evident in his voice.

She waited a second, swallowing the moment and gave her answer, gave her fate. "Take my life in place of his. Make him strong again with my life force." Spoken clearly and loud only on the inside was she mortified.

The voice did not respond immediately, it seemed to think. "Your dreams scare you do they not?"

She looked up shocked. "I don't know what you are talking about."

"You still love Kal-el and you don't want Jimmy Olsen to hurt when he finds out."

She dropped a tear she had no idea she was holding. "How did you know that?"

"I keep close watch on those my son trusts. His faith is faltered now. One has already turned on him, will you be the next?"

"I would never betray him especially not in the way the Lana did." She screamed at the nothingness that answered back.

"There are things you do not know Miss Sullivan."

"Like what?"

"Kal-el hides what he is most shameful of. He has good reason not to tell you everything."

"What do you mean?"

"It will be his choice to tell you not mine."

"Is he hurt because of it?"

"Yes, you already know that."

"If he's hurt because of something I need to know."

"This is not my decision to make, do not press me for answers."

Frustrated and tired she gave up. "Will you accpect my offer."

"In due time. You will be needed soon."

She felt a light surround her and everything freeze, her world had stopped.

Lois walked down the steps carefully and was greeted by Mrs. Kent from the kitchen. "He asleep?"

Lois smiled as she remembered tucking him back in. "Yeah but I can't be down long. He needs me." She grabbed a glass from the cabinet and filled it with water. In a matter of seconds she downed it.

"Lois you can't be with him every second." Martha stated matter-of-factly.

She looked at her and sat the glass down. "Yes I can."

"No. I won't allow you to waster away answering to his every whim. Lois he doesn't want your help. He doesn't want you to be there every second. He needs time to heal." Lois gave her an angry look. "Mentally, physically and emotionally."

"Don't you think I know that?"

"If you know then why are you arguing with me?"

She pointed up to his room and got in her face. "Because I love that plaid wearing farm boy up stairs! I will not stand by and wait while he is in pain. I need him just as much as he needs me."

Mrs. Kent stood at watched her for a moment. "He's no longer that man you once knew Lois. He doesn't wear that plaid and his 'farm boy' boutique just ran out the door. Right now he's in desperate need to heal and not be hurt again." Martha gave her a knowing look.

Lois's shock flashed in her eyes briefly before confronting the issue. "Oh. So that's the real season you want me to leave isn't it? You think I'm going to hurt him again? What happened to you loving me and not blaming me?"

Just then there was a knock at the door and Lois ran to answer it only to be greeted by Oliver Queen on the other side. "LOIS! Oh thank God you're alright!" He picked her up and pulled her into a kiss that she didn't refuse until it was too late. She pushed him away as fast as she could when she finally found her bearings and turned around.

Martha Kent gave her a look of disgust. Her warm glowing eyes dulled and began to drain as the tears slipped down her cheek. She only mouthed the words, "Exactly." And then turned and walked up the steps.

"NO!" She yelled after her before turning to face Oliver. She punched him in the stomach and brought him to his knees. "YOU SOB!"

"Lois...Lois I'm sorry. I thought if I came back everything would be ok again. Lana told me Clark died."

Her steps staggered her away from him as she shook in a fearful pace. "Clark's upstairs asleep." She whispered and he heard. "When did you see her?"

"Just about an hour ago at the Talon." She kicked him out the door and ran up the stairs.

Mrs. Kent was sitting beside his door, tears still streaking.

"You told him?"

"No. He's sleeping." She stroked her hand against the air as if touching his face. "Is she here?"

"No but I'm afraid she will be. How are we going to stop her?"

Mrs. Kent pulled a 9' from her shirt and handed it to Lois without looking at her. "Any way possible."

Lois tucked it away in her pocket and continued on into his room.

"Don't hurt her Lois."

She looked at his back that was now facing her. The frail shakes indicated his breathing. "If I have to I will."

"No. Don't hurt her."

"Why do you keep trying to protect her? She tried to hill you! She injected you with kryptonite! She's the reason you're in pain!"

"I can't explain why." Barely above a whisper. He saw the images flash through his head. 'You don't remember.' Another blow. 'Your trust is nothing!' Blow. 'Alien!'

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to."

She took another step forward. "What is it Clark? What could be so bad that you can't tell me? For some reason you still care about her despite it all and as the woman who loves you damn it I have to know!"

"I don't have to tell you." A whisper in his ear, 'No one needs to know.', and a wicked smile.

"Do you not love me?"

"I don't know anymore Lois."

She jumped, 'that was unexpected.' "What? How can you say that?"

He turned his head and stared at her. "How can I love someone who is willing to kill?"

"I'm trying to save you, your mom, Chloe and even myself here! I couldn't live with myself if I let her take someone else's life."

"And I couldn't live with myself if you killed her!"

"WHY? GIVE ME AN ANSWER!"

"YOU HURT HER AND I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU LOIS! You have no right to kill, no one does. If you hurt her I wouldn't be able to love you any more."

Tears claimed her as she spoke, her shaking was uncontrollable, her breathing taking sharp gasps. "Yes you would. Your heart is mine as mine is yours. Neither of us would be whole again."

He turned again away from her. "I'd learn to live without one."

"SMALLVILLE! I don't understand how-"

"You don't need to understand. You don't need to know my reasons. Not every secret of mine is yours."

"You don't trust me do you?" Her voice was cracking, she couldn't take much more.

"How can I?"

"I have taken care of you. I've helped you."

This time he turned over completely, some how, without to much effort. "Lois when I look at you I don't see your love for me anymore. All I see is the pity you have on me. I DON'T WANT YOUR PITY! I want love and acceptance. I couldn't give a damn if I hurt for the rest of my life. If I had your heart in the first place I wouldn't be here right now."

She fell off the bed and scooted back towards the door and stood. Her eyes searched the room frantically, but the words she found scared her the most. "You blame me too?"

"Lois...I didn't-"

"No. You said it. How can you believe that?"

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say it."

"But you did Smallville. I would of never went out with Oliver if I had known you loved me or if I had known you would get hurt."

"You knew that I love you. I told you and you refused to admit it!"

"Smallville don't-"

"You couldn't believe that the guy you hung out with everyday fell for you."

"I know now."

"Only because you love me back!"

"What do you want me to say? I can't take anything back. All I want..." She sat down on the bed again and stroked his back, he shivered against her touch. "All I want is a life with you in it. I want you to get better so I don't have to live with the guilt of hurt you if I touch you." She saw the bruised tissue you on his back and closed her eyes sadly.

"Just stop Lois."

"I can't. I can't stop loving you. I can't do that."

"I'm not asking you to stop loving me, I want your love. I need your love, it's the only thing that gets me through the day. Lois I beg you, please don't hurt her."

"Smal-Clark. Give me one reason, one reason, that's all I ask."

"No questions?"

She smiled half heartedly. "For now."

"Lex nearly murdered her in front of me. She...she was the mother to my still born child." 'Look Clark! Look it's our baby! See!!! She has your eyes, I bet you.' She rubbed her stomach softly, a smile stuck to her face. But he knew that when she walked out the door she pulled the sheet away and revealed the truth, nothing was there. 'I had you child! It's dead! Lex killed it!' Blow. 'You have to believe me.' Blow.

Lois bit her lip, another tear escaped. She didn't want to ask but she had to know. "One question."

"Depends."

"Was it forced or.." She couldn't finish the question for the life of her.

"Yes. But that didn't matter it was still my child."

"I'm so sorry."

"Don't be."

"Do you love her?"

"I could never love her Lois."

Some confront returned to her form. "Then why do you defend her?"

He smiled. This was the Lois he knew. "Never gonna give up are you?"

"I want answers, I get answers." Her smile returned.

"She made a grave in the room that read: Serenity Lane Kent. She told me that we were never meant to have children. She told me that you were looking for me still. She gave me hope. Everyday when she came in to visit she would tell me about you. She let me be happy." 'Lois looks for you day and night. I'm afraid though she'll never find you, she needs to get you out.'

She studied his eyes carefully, still hidden in a swirl of mystery and clouded by brief moments she couldn't read. "But yet there's more?"

"Yes."

"Not tonight. We need rest."

"I agree."

"I'm going downstairs. I'll sleep on the couch."

"Alright."

"I love you."

"Good night Lois."

She walked down the hall unaware of anything but that he didn't say he loved her back. Something bigger was hidden she concluded. Something worse than losing a child. Little did she know she would find out soon enough.

He felt a searing pain in his heart as he closed his eyes. "She didn't tell me." He whispered to the darkness.

"She didn't need to did she?" He flung his eyes open to the window where Oliver Queen sat, smile plastered to his face. He jumped down in front of the bed and ripped the covers off of him. He pulled the needle from his pocket and pulled away the plastic cover.

"Does it matter where I stick this? I mean it'll work wither way right?" He grabbed Clark's chest and slowly pushed the needle through the skin. He worked it around to get a better sense of pain out of his face.

Clark just sat there, unable to move or scream. Tears flooded his face once again and the weakness returned to his mind. His eyes flutters as they fought reality and imagination.

Oliver watched laughing to himself. "You don't steal my woman without consequence. Got it?" He walked over to the window and threw one leg out before saying, "Lana's going to take you back. Just give in and everything will be easier." He jumped and ran back to his car. Turning and smiling one more time before he left.

She walked from the car into the door and watched Lois fall to her knees in front of Mrs. Kent. Lois crying was no longer unusual, but Mrs. Kent just walking away without consoling was. She didn't care right now. She had to talk to Clark, to tell him what she's done. To tell him he'll never hurt again from this.

She walked slowly upstairs, the echoing cries from Lois growing fainter with every second that ticked by. Her hand reached the doorknob and she felt a cold gust slash at her heart. She knew the moment was soon.

The ring she loved was still at the fortress on her cold body. Her soul was guided here for a final goodbye. She slipped through the door with no noise. She wasn't really here she knew that.

The darkness of the room surrounded her and overcame her senses as she stepped towards his body. She knew of the syringe sticking out of his heart. She was separated by the right and wrong thing to do. She could hear every voice in his head screaming and cursing. She felt every heart beat as they slowed.

She laid her hand on his forehead and his eyes shot open. He looked straight through her. She smiled and told him the last thing he would ever hear from her.

"I love you. Never forget me."

She felt a tug from her stomach and she was sucked back into her clod lifeless body. The last image she would ever see was Clark Kent's smile. The last thing she would ever hear was his heart beat. The least thing she wanted was to tell Jimmy she was sorry she couldn't really love him. The last feeling she would ever have was regret.

"Your time has been served well Chloe Sullivan. Your choices were well made. I will return you to your family so they may bury you properly. Thank you for your sacrifice. Thank you for loving my son."


	12. Reminisce

Chapter 12: Reminisce

He sat in the barely lit loft, stretching his arms and flexing his hands. He had just put down his pen after writing in his journal for the first time. He found that he had a lot to empty from his soul.

'Lana and I are no longer together. That seems to be the sentence that has defined me lately. I loved her but her secrets and lies speech was starting to get old. I think I had imagined happiness with her for so long that I started to see things that were not even there.I started to think she was perfect but as she has clearly pointed out to me she's not. I just can't imagine being without her now after so long.

Which brings me to my ultimate question, the one that has burdened me since I found out my secret. Was I meant to be alone? Who could really accept me for what I am? Who could really love a person like me? And then some how I drift my thought to Lois.

Lois. I know this isn't supposed to happen. Me think about Lois? But it has. Every second of every day. Every time I look around the farm I see her face. I see something that has happened between us. I see...how much I love her. This scares me because Lois will never think of me that way? She's my best friend. She's the only person who can get to me. She's...

Beautiful

Intelligent

Caring

Sweet

Fierce in a good way

Guarded

She's a lot like me. She has secrets just like me. She's afraid of being alone just like me. She's...Lois Lane. She's the woman I can't stand to not be around. She's the woman that hurts me more than any one else could. She's the woman I love, who's taken.

Oliver Queen. He's nothing like what she deserves. He lies to her. He's never there for her in the way she needs. He goes overboard on the hero stuff. He's...something like me, which is the thing that bothers me the most. How could she pick him over me? Maybe it's because he's rich but deep down I know that doesn't matter to her. Maybe it's because he's suave but I know she thinks he doesn't pull it off. Maybe it's because I've never given her a chance to BE with me. I've never given her reason to choose me over him.

Because I'm scared. I'm scared of being alone. I'm scared to let her in and her not accept me. I'm scared that she loves me and that I won't be able to give her what she wants the most: a family.'

He smiled to himself thinking about only weeks ago when he had received this. But as soon as the smile appeared it faltered and faded, his dad and Lana. His face turns to the stars, the place where he once had a home. A home full of people who could love and understand him. He lost that. He was the only one left. There was no one else truly like him. Seeing his family and friends everyday made him envious. They weren't the last of their kind.

The tears threaten him, giving him no ultimatum other than her presence behind him. He could sense her worry covered in eyes. It was always there.

"How long were you planning on standing there before saying something?" He looked down at the journal and picked it up, tucking it under the cushion before she saw it.

She stepped forward in front of him but didn't meet his eyes. "Snappy aren't we Smallville? Only a few more minutes, promise."

"I'm not in the mood for your jokes Lois. Just go away." 'Please don't leave me here alone. I need you. I want you.'

"Right. Like I've ever listened to you Smallville. What's wrong?"

"How are you and Oliver?" 'Are you single yet? Are you at least happy with him? As long as you're happy, I'll be ok with it. I hope.'

"That bad huh?" His death stare out he opened loft was unwavering. She watched him, his eyes full of tears that he wouldn't release. She understood only to a certain extent. She didn't know what it was like but for but she did care. "Smallville, letting out your demons could help lift the burden."

He closed his eyes and shook his head. "You can't help me Lois. Just save your breath." 'Don't break me. Open me just don't break me. Help me Lois. Help me.'

Without thinking she said the words that came to mind. "Maybe the reason why you are alone is because you won't let anyone in!"

And finally those tears fell. She felt his anger as he shook. She reached out a hand to touch his shoulder but he stood and walked down the stairs into the night. 'I'm afraid of you Lois, you open me too much. Don't hurt me. Don't hurt me.'

Lois walked into the house and watched as Mrs. Kent scurried around the kitchen as she prepared dinner. The house had an empty chill without Jonathon's voice and laugh.

"Lois, honey you hungry?" She said to her as she pulled the ham from the oven.

"Not yet Mrs. Kent. I'll go wash up though." Hoping she had hid her worry well enough she took off running up the stairs only to be stopped by Mrs. Kent's voice.

"Go and get Clark when you're done sweetie." She turned and made the slow trip back down. She sat the island and Mrs. Kent turned. "Something wrong Lois?"

She looked around trying to choose her words carefully. "Why does Clark...hide...what he feels? Why can't he just-"

Mrs. Kent raised her hand and silenced her. "Clark hides so he can be strong for others. It's part of who he is."

Lois looked at her frustrated. "Why? Is he just a secret with limbs?"

"Lois, Clark keeps to himself for a reason."

She rolled her eyes. "It better be a good one."

Mrs. Kent put on her best protective smile. She knew Lois needed answers but it wasn't her place to confess her sons secrets. "Believe me it is."

"I just don't understand. He's broken which is understandable. He won't let me in or anyone which is also understandable for someone like Chloe. But he never lets anyone in."

"Lois he'll be ok. Just try not to worry too much; he'll open up to you when the time is right for him."

"I'm starting to believe he doesn't trust me. No matter how much I try to be nice to him." She caught the smirk from Mrs. Kent and smiled. "I said try didn't I? Does he trust me?"

"Lois it's not a matter of trust. He does trust you, I know it."

"Then why can't he tell me? Or anyone for that matter? What could be so...I can't find the word...um yeah...that it would end a relationship with a girl of his dreams? I'm mean heck he's just a farm-boy with a hero complex but this is ridiculous! He's got so many walls that he doesn't even know how to navigate!"

"Kinda like you?" Mrs. Kent caught him out of the corner of her eye standing beside the staircase.

"Like me? What? Smallville is not like me."

"You build walls around your heart so you won't get hurt. You barely let anyone in."

"True."

"Go wash up Lois. Dinners nearly done." She hopped down from the stool and ran back up the stairs. "You know you're really testing her?"

He stepped out from the staircase and leaned against the door frame. "Super-hearing mom?"

She looked at him with a smile. "Call it mothers-intuition."

He laughed. "I can't just tell her."

"I understand that. But you can at least let her help you. She won't admit it but she cares about you." He reached into the fridge and opens the milk carton. "And you care about her too."

He spit the milk he had in his mouth into the sink and looked at her nervously. "Lois? Me care about Lois? Mom have you lost your mind?"

Mrs. Kent cocked her head. "Clark don't take me for stupid. I know you care about her. The way you look at each other with your own unspoken language and all the other things that happen between you two when you think no one else is looking. I know that you get under her skin and that you get her too confess emotions that she hides from everyone else. I also know she does the same to you and you're scared that she'll get too close and you'll hurt her."

He sat down at the island and mirrored her earlier position. He was baffled to his mother's knowledge. She knew him so well. "I don't know what to do mom."

"You better figure it out soon, she won't wait forever."

"I know. I just don't know what to say or do. I don't want to screw this up."

Martha laughed a little to his words and placed a finger under her chin as she recited the words to a poem. "Way up high or down below, when you're too in love to let it go, if you never try then you'll never know."

Lois walked down the stairs and sat opposite from Clark as he ate nervously. "Nervous much Smallville?"

Her glances caught up with him and he looked deeply into her hazel orbs. His breathing slowed and he let himself imagine. Imagine a life where he could wake up everyday and...it stopped. She turned her head.

Mrs. Kent saw the interaction and grabbed and plate and headed outside; neither of them seemed to notice.

"Lois I'm sorry for earlier. It's just-"

"You know what Smallville? Don't apologize to me, I'm sick of your walking apologies."

He grabbed her hand as she started to get up. "I shouldn't have walked away from you like that."

She looked at their hands and whispered, "I would have done the same thing."

"You were right. I do need to let people in. I just don't know how."

Still whispering, "Why is it so hard?"

He pulled her closer and mimed her whisper, "I'm scared."

"We are all scared when vulnerable, that's how it works." Her eyes traced his lips. 'What are you doing Lane?'

Pulling her closer, "I don't want to be alone."

"You don't have to be."

She touched her hand on his shoulder and he traced it back to her lips. Before they knew it they were both leaning in, both slowly closing their eyes, both waiting from the moment when...it happened. He brushed his lips across her and her grip tightened on his shoulder. He kissed her slowly, tenderly, waiting for the repulsion, waiting for the hit. Only her biting on his lip came. The kiss intensified, the flames they had discarded were burning their souls. He pulled her closer into his lap and she wrapped her legs around him. She ran her hands through his hair wildly, she had wanted this for so long. Thoughts ran rapidly through her head until they made her open her eyes and push away from him.

She ran a hand through her hair and mouthed the words: "I just cheated on Oliver." With a smile. Something he would never forget as he traced his lips, her eyes watching his fingers. The sensation still livid in his mind, body and soul.

She leaned against the door and their eyes met again. She fumbled out a laugh, "You always have to screw stuff up Smallville."

He stood and walked over to her, claiming her lips once again. He rested his forehead on hers.

She looked at him, her emotions weren't conveyed in her words. "I love him."

He smiled. "I love you."

Her eyes searched his for the truth and what she found scared her. Those green eyes reflected her face, only her face. "Clark we can't." She weakly tried to push him away.

He kissed her again. "We can."

"But..."

He pulled her hands to his butt. "Mine."

She blushed slightly at a bold him. She looked back into his eyes. She leaned up slowly and kissed him then ran out the door leaving a satisfied smile plastered to his face.


	13. Everyone's Pain

Chapter 13: Everyone's Pain

"Lois!" Beat. Nothing more. Moment. Breathe. Silence. Tick. Suspend. Blue. Fight. Blood. Heart. Soul. Mind. Body. Gone. Beat.

"Lois!" Beat. Pain. Loss. Suffer. Emotion. Blend. Fear. Blame. Hurt. Swallow. Guilt. Beat.

"Lois!" Beat. Cheat. Move. Drop. Wrong. Torn. Broken. Bitter. Beat.

"Lois!" Beat. Lower. Crash. Breathe. Moment. Beat. Last.

"Clark! Clark! Wake up Clark! WAKE UP!" She screamed too afraid to touch him and feel the cold capture of death. The same cold of the man laid 6 feet below, 2 miles away.

His eyes rolled crazily under his lids. The exorcism licks at his life, ripping at his previously flustered brain, bringing him back with the words forever imprinted. "I love you. Never forget me." Voices fill his ears, the confusion is spread. 'AWAKEN.' The beat pace slows into normalcy, the breathing calmed. The body stopped shaking. The sleeping began.

The black and the white. The room mute from words and cries as the doors open one last time.

Out steps the limp, dressing in black head to toe. The tie straight, the button up loose and the pants strapped on with a belt from the closet of his own. The tears permanently dried to his sunken in face, the scars visible only with the light. His hair carefully combed away from his face, revealing the strength from all that is gone.

Out steps the young, dressing in black head to toe. The dress zipped alone, the shoes making the click and the panty-hose without a snag. The tears permanently hide behind the eyes that real no less than the whispers by her hands and his. Her hair carefully pulled back from her face, keeping her together as she watches his strides, his limp that he couldn't hide.

Out steps the broken, dressing in black head to toe. The suit zipped and buttoned, the shoes scuffle across the floor and the handkerchief covers her eyes. The tears run ramped and over take her flawlessness, making the sniffles loud and wheezing. Her hair hangs loosely in curls as it covers her disbeliefs and her madness.

2 people. 2 years.

He struggled as his confidence never faltered. He limped in front of the group and said his peace to the closed casket before them all. He turned to give his eulogy from the memories. Lois and Mrs. Kent sat in the front row ready to help him if he couldn't stand anymore. He didn't need help today. He could be on his own for once.

"Chloe was my best friend, she protected me and my secrets. She gave me hope. She found me at my weakest and brought me back. She gave me something I never would have asked from, she gave me her life. She was one of the few I know that would care more about others than her self. Every time I had a problem, she was there. She saw me through it despite her own agony. She was everything you could have asked for in a person. She gave and gave and she still gives today. She gives me love, strength and wisdom. She gives me everything I feel right now. She gives me my life back."

He wiped the tears from his eyes. "She gives me something to believe in." He reached out his hand to Lois who stood now by his side. "I've always had fears. Fears of heights and fears of dreams. Fear of living without love. It's sad that it takes something like this to let yourself understand everything people went through. Lois is Chloe's cousin. Without Chloe I never would have met her. I'm thankful for that because Lois has always been a true friend and still remains to be."

Lois looked down at his words. 'Friend.' She lifted her head again and felt his fingers graze across her knuckles weakly, hope. "My cousin. She brought me here. She gave me family and friendship and love. She introduced me to the Kent's. She led me to journalism. Everything I have now is in someway because of her. Yeah it sounds cheesy but it's true. I wish I could thank her to her face but somehow I know she watching us."

They both turned and looked at the casket again. "We love you. We'll never forget you." They turned again and walked out of the church, unable to keep composure in front of the crowd anymore.

They walked outside and sat on the bench, Clark watched as the snow flakes fell and Lois watched him as he refused t give in to the cold.

"Everything will be ok again." She whispered to him, her words sending the voices in his mind reeling out of control.

He winced into a sigh and refused to meet her hazel gaze. "If you keep saying it, you may start to believe it's real."

"Clark, we can't just let this stop our lives. We've got to be strong."

He laughed into his remorse. "Strength. Define strength Lois." His jaw clenched, his hurt showing as his grip tightened on the wood.

"Strength is an asset to any human. It's the ability to withstand force or pressure. Strength defined your character, it used to make you the man I love." She reached out and grabbed his hand away from the wood. "It still makes you who you are today."

He nodded. "Strength." He pulled his hand away. "I've lost two people. My best friend and my dad. They were my strength, they were my soul and everything I believed in. Strength is just an excuse to have feelings."

"Those feelings, those emotions are what leaves us grounded. It makes us..."

"Human?"

"Live."

He laid his hand back in hers and sealed it inside. A smile formed against his lips, his teeth still showed to be as white as ever.

"You just have to stop blaming yourself Smallville."

"You say that a lot."

"It's good advice." She shrugged.

"You're so full of yourself." He grinned.

"What else would I be full of?" She leaned against his shoulder, careful not to hurt him.

"Aw, Lionel isn't it sweet? Lois and Clark...aw."

"Yes Lana. They look just so...happy."

Lois jumped straight up from the bench and stepped cautiously between Clark and Lionel and Lana. She held her hands in a position that spoke thunderously of the things she would do if another foot was set forward.

"I swear. Get away or you both get it."

Lana took yet another step forward and Lois raised her guard some more. "Chill Lois. I'm just here to pay my respects." She worked her head around Lois and saw Clark visibly shaking on the bench. Her heart dropped. "Clark? How are you doing?"

He stood behind Lois without a word. "Standing? Hm. Getting better faster than I though possible. What happened Lionel?"

"The lead must be deteriorating. The kryptonite is flowing right through his body instead of permanent cycles."

"Chloe and Lois took them out."

Lana's evil smile faltered. "Oliver sweetheart, go get it."

Oliver stepped out from behind the corner and went into the limo. He came back and stood in front of them with a briefcase. He set it in front of Lana. Clark took a step back, wielding a smile from them all but Lois. She darted her eyes from his face to the case, she couldn't make a connection.

She pointed at it. "What's in there?"

Lana kept her attention on Clark. "Something. It's a secret between me and Clark. Right Clark?"

He met her eyes. Hatred. "What do you want from me Lana?"

"I want you to come back home, to come back to me. Everything will get better faster that way."

"He's never going back with you bitch!"

Oliver raised his brow. "No need for vulgarity Lois."

"Shut it Oliver."

"Feisty. Like always."

Lana starred at her. "Lois you have no idea what you're dealing with do you?"

She questioned her motionlessly and didn't get an answer. "If you touch him..."

"You'll what? You can fight all of us and Clark can't help you now."

Lana rubbed his shoulder, her stare still on Clark's figure. "Oliver be a sweetheart and get him."

Lois stepped in front of Clark and Oliver stopped. "What happened to the man I used to know? Where's Oliver Queen?"

"This is him."

"No. Oliver would have never listend to Lana or Lionel or hurt Clark."

"That Oliver was fake." He took another step forward just ot have her push him back.

"This Oliver is fake."

He just starred at her. "Lois you never knew me."

"I knew you. I knew everything about you. You were sweet and kind and hard headed. This isn't you."

"So what?"

"This isn't the Oliver I used to care about." He looked away. "What happened?"

"I lost you."

She gave him a sympathetic smile. "It happens. You'll find someone better than me."

"Right."

"You will. I promise."

A gleam returned to his eyes that she hadn't seen in 2 years. Lana caught it as well. "Oliver?"

"Screw you and your plan too Lana." He pulled his cross bow from his pocket and shot the top of the building beside the church. "See you guys soon." He was then pulled away.

Lois smirked. "Looks like you just lost your little buddy there Lana."

"You are still out numbered."

"You want to make a bet on that?" A womanly voice from behind them held onto Clark's hand.

"Martha?" Lionel peeped his head around warily.

"Lionel." She stated in utter disgust.

"Martha I didn't know-"

"That I was at Chloe's funeral? Of course I'm here."

"Lana we should go."

She looked at him like he was crazy. "What? No."

He grabbed the suitcase. "NOW!" Then he shuffled back to the car.

She stepped forward towards Clark and he nudged Lois out of the way. Lana touched his face and he gritted his teeth. "Come home. Come back. I want to help you."

He looked to the car and then bent down to her ear. "I'm sure Lex would agree."

She looked at him skeptically. "Lex doesn't want to hurt you."

"Bull shit."

"Clark this is a peace offering."

"I'll never love you Lana. Never again."

She smiled. "Ah, but you see: it never mattered before did it?"

He pulled his head back and fought the tears in his eyes. The memories of the nights behind him danced, flaunting the pain and despair. She smirked unmercifully. He slugged her with all his might and she fell the 2 feet into the limo that awaited her. The smile still plastered to her hollow face.

His breathing intensified as the rest wondered and were shocked. Clark Kent didn't hit women. "From now on, progress. I have to get better. I have to get stronger. I can't be this weak anymore." He gasped for breath.

Martha took his hand. "Ok. We'll start first thing tomorrow."

He jerked his hand away. "I start now." He stood shaking and limped off into the snowy woods, Lois hot on his trail. Martha jumped in the truck and punched the gas as she cried her way home.

"What did you say to Lana?"

"Nothing important Lois."

"It must have been for you to hit her like that."

He stopped and turned, his frustration rising. "I told her that I would never love her. She said it never mattered before. Happy?"

"Don't be angry with me Smallville. That was your mistake."

"Lois, don't! You have no idea what you're talking about!"

"Oh, but the problem is I do! You thought that since I wouldn't love you, you could turn to her and everything could get better!"

He kept walking as his pace slowed and his breathing increased. The cold wasn't affecting him anymore, his was too numb to tell, as was she. "You don't know Lois."

"What don't I know? Come on Smallville! You can't carry the weight of the world and it's secrets too! Talk to me!" She grabbed his arm and forced him to face her. "Talk to me!"

He turned his head away. "I can't."

"Why?" He still couldn't meet her eyes. "Whatever it is won't change anything Clark. The past is the past, I'm your future. And if I do say so myself the future looks bright and beautiful."

He cracked a smile and finally met her gaze. "You got that right."

She smiled at him, happy to finally get his attention. "What happened?"

He pulled her into a hug and rested his face in her hair. He inhaled her scent and drew up his nerves. "Lex was in the limo."

She gasped and held him tight while looking around to make sure that they weren't followed.

The old beat up red Chevy pulled into the driveway, each clunk it made mocked the tears still streaming down her face. To her surprise a familiar car was parked near the barn. She walked in the door and saw his sunken down body sitting on the couch.

His face was in his hands, his suit still on, making his sullen aurora darken the room. She could only watch. He looked up to her, the ring lay across his hands, the tears collected in a small puddle around them. He never got to say good-bye. He didn't know what had happened. He never got to tell her how much he loved her, it had just begun for him. "I quit my job at the Planet."

She sat down beside him. "Jimmy, you can't just stop. Life goes on. It's never easy."

"But every time I go there I see her face, hear her voice. I can't live like that."

"I know how you feel. Everything will be ok again eventually, I promise."

Jimmy smiled meekly as he continued to roll the ring around in his hand.

Lois busted through the door, her dress covered in mud and her stilettos broken. She slipped on some tennis shoes and reached into the fridge as Mrs. Kent peeped around the corner. "Long walk?"

"Yeah. I just gotta get Smallville some water. He's SUPER tired. He said he's going to walk everyday till he gets better. I'm going to be in good shape!" She turned her head and saw Jimmy. "Jimmy, hi." The awkwardness came back to her voice. She hadn't expected him to come visit so soon.

"Hi."

"You ok?"

"I will be."

"Good." She walked out the door with the 2 bottles of water she had grabbed and ran back into the woods about ½ a mile away. She found him on the same log she had left him sitting on.

He smiled as he saw her coming, his chest still heaving in and out. "Wish I could run like that."

She laughed and stopped in front of him. "Shut up. You'll be able to run at light speed soon, lucky dog. And plus you don't have these boobs bouncing as you run." She lifted them up off her chest and watched him blush. 'Same old farm boy.' She dropped them and tapped him on the shoulder. "Just kidding Smallville, sheesh. Can't take a joke can you?"

His blush hadn't went down any. "Lois..um..."

It clicked. "Can you still feel the emotion or is that..."

"Emotions are in check Lois."

"Oh. Hee hee. Sorry. I just assumed since Jr. isn't cooperation...I'll shut up." She watched his face, his smile was fake. "Clark?"

He eyes were still glued to the ground. "Yeah?"

"Does it bother you that you can't...um...do...anything about your situation?"

"I probably could but who knows what would happen."

She sat down beside him. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I don't know how exactly the injection worked. It could have just clogged me up and all I need is to...force...the clog out. But it could have cut some ties down there and it could be permanent."

"How will you ever find out?"

"I'm sure Lana could tell me."

"Yeah and that would mean she would probably have to touch you. That's not happening on my watch."

"Lois, if she did this to me, she might be the only one who can fix it."

"What makes you so certain that she wouldn't try to hurt you again?"

"I just am."

"Well I'm sorry but that isn't good enough for me."

He looked into her eyes, he was pleading with her to stop. He was uncomfortable and he really didn't know how to talk about his situation with someone else. Truth be told he hadn't done any exploring into the matter himself to see what would happen.

"Ok. I'll drop this for now. But you will have to talk to me sometime Smallville."

She handed him his bottle and he accepted it gratefully. As soon as he started twisting the cap it shattered and he watched it curiously. He started looking around himself and found that he was bathed in sun light. He smiled.

"Let's get out of the woods."

"Why?"

"You'll see." He grabbed her hand and she walked with him carefully, every second his strides became faster. They reached the edge and he stepped out into the light. It seemed to make his body glow. She remember that night 2 months ago when she had done the same thing for him. She had turned into a ball of flame and he woke up.

"Smallville?"

He stretched his arms and looked at her with a world famous smile. Her knees suddenly became weak. "Yeah?"

"What does the sun do to you?"

"I figured out long ago that it was my power source. I guess we'll have to work tomorrow when I start training." He reached out his hand and urged her to come on as he began to walk again.

She watched his movement, they seemed to be more easy on his body but to her disappointment that limp was still there. 'What caused that limp?' She kept asking herself, to afraid to ask him and get an answer that would scare her to death. She supposed he would limp till he got his muscles back. She sighed, she couldn't wait for the muscles.

"Lois? You ok?"

"Coming!" She ran up to his side and walked beside him. It was strange. She felt so empty. Every time she thought about him she couldn't help but remember all the times in the past. Like he wasn't even here with her now. 'Maybe he's not.' She looked at him, he had a smile on his face. 'He's still hiding something, you know that.' There was still a distant look in his eyes. She couldn't figure out why they were still clouded, like when he looked at her she couldn't see into him like she used to. She didn't know how to talk to him. He had developed a whole other way to hide his secrets and that scared her. She had already broken down one barrier but so many more had been built up since last night. So many walls.

"1/4 a mile to go Smallville." He was still staring at his feet and didn't even acknowledge her presence, but suddenly his expression changed to pain. "Smallville you alright?"

He closed his eyes and dropped to his knees while covering his ears. He started scream things she didn't understand. "CLARK! WHAT'S WRONG?"

"THE KEY!!!!!"

She looked around frantically. "The key? What's that? What key?"

"Lois go get my mom! I gotta leave!"

"Clark..."

"GET MY MOM!" She took off running back to the house. Good thing she was still in shape.

She banged through the kitchen door straight up to Mrs. Kent. "Mrs. Kent!"

She turned around worried at Lois's movements. "What's wrong? Is Clark ok?"

"I don't know! He just dropped to his knees and covered his ears. He started screaming something about 'the key' and said he had to leave. What's going on?"

Martha's eyes got wide and she took off running out the door, Lois running after her. "What's going on?"

"When Clark does that Jor-el calls to him. He has to get to the fortress or the noise won't stop."

"What's the key?"

"It's how we get to the fortress. Chloe's the last one that had it."

"Then how is it calling to him?"

"I don't know. Kryptonians have their own way of calling to each other."

"As in?"

"Each family has a different sound, when Clark hears his he knows that Jor-el is calling for him." They found him in the same position as before, still fighting to get the sound out of his head. They picked him up and packed him to the truck where he continued to rock back and forth to keep the noise at bay. As soon as they reached the caves he rolled out of the truck and climbed his way to stand in the caves. He stumbled inside of them gripping the walls for support. The memories from the past flooded his mind and he couldn't shake them. The noise and sights becoming unbearable.

He walked into the chamber and stood at the podium where he waved his hand over the top of the key hole. A bright light shot out of it and Lois and Mrs. Kent ran in with him, both grasping his arms tight. But nothing happened.

"Smallville what happened?"

"The ring stopped. Why did the ringing stop?" The light shot out again and sucked them into the fortress.

"Nice place Smallville." She started to look around. "Wait I've been here before."

Mrs. Kent grabbed her arm. "Sh."

"What? Why?"

She pointed towards Clark who was standing in front of the consol as it began to glow.

"Kal-el you have come."

"Why did you call me here?"

"Kal-el your life is changing. And your weaknesses grow stronger. The evil you once knew has returned."

"I know all of this."

"You have lost yet another life to save your own."

"I never would have asked for that! I never wanted her to die, especially for me."

"She came here with full knowledge of what she wanted, you had no decisions for her choices. Her life force brought you back. It's given you enough strength to return you to an almost human state. If you want to have your abilities back, Kal-el, you're going to have to push through the pain and work constantly."

"I KNOW ALL OF THIS! Why have you called me here?"

"The evil is coming for you again, they have your weakness, they know what affects you the most. When they come Lois Lane nor Martha Kent will be able to help you. You have little time to train. Your life cannot be restored by sacrifice again. Your last chance for freedom begins now." The crystals stopped glowing and they were returned to the cave in which they had entered.

Clark didn't face them, he simply turned and started his journey out. The women whispered still frozen in their tracks.

"He'll die if he doesn't get better Mrs. Kent." Lois was shaking, she didn't know what to do. She was over whelmed.

"He could die trying to get better. If he pushes himself too hard his heart could give out."

"I'll keep a close watch on his. Promise."

She started to walk forward when she felt her arm being tugged at. When she turned Mrs. Kent said, "We'll keep a close watch on him. Together." She smiled and pulled Lois into a hug.

"Mrs. Kent you know I can handle this."

"I do. But sometimes it's good to have someone to lean on when the stress become unbearable."

Lois looked into those tired eyes and smiled to the request. "If you say so." She quickened her pace and caught up to Clark, his head down deep in concentration.

When he felt her presence beside her, he looked up to the sky and didn't avoid her for the first time in a long time.

"Lois I don't know what's going to happen to me. How will I fight without you and mom when they have my weakness? What if I don't get better? What if I barely make any improvement? What if I don't make it? I don't get any more chances. This is it. I'm the last one of my kind. The fate of an entire race rests on my shoulders."

"Smallville I wish they were alive so they could see you right now. They would be so proud of the man you have become. They would tell you to look forward to getting better. To look forward to getting stronger and faster, without worrying about the bad. You've gotta fight this."

He dropped a tear down his cheek. "What if I lose you? Or Mom?"

Realization hit her. His biggest fears were laid out in front of him, no wonder he's terrified. "You're not going to lose us Smallville. You're stuck with us."

"He said you won't be there to help me. What if he meant you will be dead?"

Lois stopped dead in her tracks. Clark stopped and dropped his head into his hands and gave a weak cry. "I'm not going to die. Your mom's not going to die. You can't think like that."

"But Chloe-"

She pulled up his face and rubbed her thumb over his cheek. "Chloe died by her own free will."

"What if you try to do the same?"

"Clark if it comes to me dying for you then I will, no questions."

He grabbed her hands from his face and shook them furiously. His cries intensified. "NO!!! Lois, no!!!" He pulled at her hand desperately. Desperate for her to stay alive. Desperate for her to take that back. "You can't die. No."

"Clark if it meant you dying or me then it would be me. You could find someone else."

He looked at her, her eyes conveyed a hurt that she had never given him before. It scared him. "There is no one else. No one else. If you died...Lois please just don't say that. I'm so scared that I'm going to screw this up. So scared that I won't live long enough to make you truly happy. So scared that this is still that dream. This is torture! I'm so lost right now. I have so much I have to accomplish just to live another day. It's so hard just standing here, just walking a few feet, just moving at all. It's so hard to remember everything that has happened and to know it could happen again. I used to be so strong and unbreakable. I could keep everything in and be ok. Now I'm a different person! I cry every second. I break with the slightest thought. I hurt in ways I never thought of and I don't know if it'll ever stop. Make it stop Lois. Make it stop please! I'm begging. I don't want to live like this anymore."

He dropped to his knees in front of her and all she could do was watch. She didn't have actions that could do as he asked. She put a hand on his shoulder. "You start your training not only physically but mentally. Soon you won't be so afraid. Everything will get better."

He shook his head and she bent down to hold him.

Mrs. Kent watched with her eyes glistening as a prayer ran through her head. "Dear God, Please help me piece them both back together. I only wish for their health and happiness. I only wish to ease everyone's pain."

The snow stopped falling as her prayer came to a close. The season of death was ending.


	14. Lana Lang

Chapter 14: Lana Lang

She stood in the freshly lit green room and looked to the shackles that hung in an outstretched position on the wall. Red stains outlined his once hanging body bringing a sick feeling back to her heart. She loves him more than anything and with every day that passes she slowly realizes more and more what she has done. But yet again she had just tried to convince him to return to the same torture he nearly died from months ago.

She stroked the air softly, she could still see his face hangs there, he eyes lighting up only slightly when she came alone. She kissed at his lips and she fell through her reverie. She missed the sensation of his lips upon hers, his strong hands holding her body in just the right way, she missed him. The longing was slowly becoming unbearable.

She knew something was still hidden in his eyes: his thankfulness that she told someone. He felt some emotion towards her other than hate, at least it was something.

She could still see the pain surging through his eyes as she pulled the kryptonite from her pocket and hit him in the face. His disbelief that she would ever hurt him like this. She didn't want to, not now. She only wanted his company again. She wanted him to need her just like he used to. He had depended on her, though she lied to him about a lot of things.

She turned and ran her hands around the white table, the cuffs still attached at 4 points, where she had hurt him the most and taken away any man's pride. She could reverse it, she knew that. She didn't want to imagine the fact that he wouldn't BE with her afterwards though. He would be with Lois. He needs to be happy, said a distant corner of her mind. She always told herself that he had to be happy.

She looked at the needle shaking in her hand. The liquid that could turn everything around for him. The liquid lead that would allow him to pass that particular form of kryptonite faster. She would never get close enough to inject it though. Her thoughts went to Oliver.

He was supposed to bring him to her so she could help him but his jealousy got in the way. Now he was gone and she had practically no chance. There was some hope, but no one could find out. She had to do this on her own with no one around. Lois. Yet again her thoughts drifted back to her. Lois would be with him 24/7 if she could. It would be almost impossible. Unless...no. Lois would never trust her. Clark would. Clark would.

She heard the steps and clinks of Lex walking into the room on his crutches. She slipped the needle back into the suitcase and turned to him with a smile.

He had had no funeral. Lionel took him to "Africa" warehouse and had some how brought him back with yet another Clark Kent concoction. No one yet knew of the side effects but she was sure something was to come or she hoped. She didn't want to spend the rest of her life with that man. Her heart couldn't be with him. She wanted Clark. Or she at least wanted to know he could be happy.

"Lana? Is everything ok?" He laid his hand on her shoulder and she shivered against the icy coldness of it. It had been replaced with a metal one after his death when the circulation was cut off, all the nerves in his hand were too damaged to be fixed.

It took every fiber in her being not to knock it off. "Everything's perfect now that you're back."

He smiled a twisted, evil, black smile. "What are you doing in here?"

She looked back to the bloody imprint, "I'm planning what we're going to do to him this time."

"That's my girl."

'Clark Kent's girl.' They turned and walked out. The count down has begun. 2 months till they get him back. 2 months. 2 long lonesome months.

(AUTHORS NOTE) I seem to be using the number 2 a lot. Who's noticed? I have reasoning behind it. But I want to know what you think. What's up with the number 2? (END AUTHORS NOTE)

7:00 A.M. The sun is up. A small cool breeze was blowing. 65 degrees, warm for winter. The snow had melted and evaporated. Lois adjusted her hat, zipped her jacket and slid on her sweat pants. Training day 1.

She ran up the stairs to his room, quietly opened the door and the blew the whistle that hung around her neck. He jumped straight up.

"LOIS!!! What are you doing?"

"No feelings here Smallville. Up at 0700 hrs. sharp! From now until 1800 hrs. I'm Drill Sergeant Lane to you. Move it soldier we've got work to do."

He smiled up at her. Her outfit was hilarious to him. "Having fun yet?"

She smiled and winked at him. "Of course. Now let's move it."

"Lois, I need help you know."

She shook her head, "Not today you don't." She threw him some clothes. "Socks and shoes are down stairs."

"Lois?"

"Drill Sergeant Lane." She corrected him.

He laughed a little. "D.S.L.? You're high speed internet?"

"Keep cracking jokes, Kent. You'll find out why they call it 'stoning' if you keep it up."

He looked into her eyes with worry. Why was she acting like this? He knew she wanted to help but this was crazy. He grabbed his shirt and pulled it off. It was a slow process. She watched him for a second then turned and walked out the door.

"When you are ready call for me Kent. I'll help you out today."

"Yes ma'am." He tugged at the shirt for a few seconds and finally got it off. He grabbed the replacement and slipped it on much easier. He then stood and leaned against the bed. He dropped his boxers and picked up his other clothes before dropping them on the floor.

He starred at Jr. for a second. "Come on buddy. You're going to have to work at some point." He waited. Did he move? Nope. Crap.

He stepped inside his boxers and grabbed the bed. With his other hand he worked them up, same with his pants.

He limped over to the door and turned the knob with little effort to his surprise. The door swung open and Lois, D.S.L., stood at the head of the steps. She held out her hand without facing him. He took it gratefully; they had had enough trouble getting him down yesterday. He looked at her; she looked down the steps and took one. He watched how she moved. He couldn't really remember what it was like to walk so freely.

He squeezed her hand as he lifted his leg and sat it down, easy part. He grabbed the rail and she smacked away his hand from hers.

"Drill Sergeant Lane?"

"Yes Kent?"

"Why did you let go of my hand?"

"You only get one helper, me or the rail."

He looked at the rail and let it go. He grabbed her hand to prove that he needed her. She looked at him and for the first time he couldn't read her expression.

"Don't hold my hand because you want to farm-boy. I'm not the woman you care about right now. I'm your trainer. Grab the rail."

He couldn't read her. What did she want him to do? He didn't want to let her go. "No."

She laughed. "Fear is for the weak." She stepped down in front of him and put his hand back on the rail, forcing him to let her go. Then she ran down the steps to the bottom. He looked at her hurt, not able to understand why she was being so bitchy.

"Your first mistake Kent: doubt that you couldn't. There is no couldn't or wouldn't or won't. We've got 1 hour to get you ready for some physical training. You can spend that time doubting or stretching, your choice."

He noticed that she wouldn't meet his eyes. From everything he could remember, an officer in the army would never hesitate to look you in the eyes. This was hurting her. Great. 'Suck it up Kent, let's move it.' He gripped the rail and pushed on his arm which shook rapidly. He lifted his leg and felt himself start to fall and stopped. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a flash of worry cross her features but it was fiercely covered in her firmness. His leg dropped on to the step. 1 of 12. Not good enough.

He pushed his leg forward and down, repeating the process 9 more times. Every step made it harder for him to catch his balance and keep it in check as he moved. He looked to D.S.L. and she caught the tiredness in his look.

"Ok. Good job troop." She walked up beside him and held out her hand again.

"I'm going to do this."

She grabbed his hand quickly. "You push yourself too hard and your body will give out. There's no turning back from that. You need to listen to me."

"No." He pushed her hand away and grabbed the rail and lifted his leg.

She took a step down and slid in front of him. "Can't let you do that soldier. Your Mom would kill me."

"Lois!"

"Drill-"

"LOIS! Move now!"

"No can do."

"Fine." He slid to the other side and set his leg down and with his other he jumped at step. He grabbed the rail with both hands and got both feet situated. He slid both legs onto the floor and let out a breath.

She walked on past him into the kitchen. He heard her open the fridge. "Coming Kent?"

He tried to take a step and fell over. She ran in front of him and picked him up. "I told you not to take those last two steps alone. They have the worst gravity effect on your body."

He took a step forward and steadied himself. Then another until he had made it out the door.

"He doesn't work well when angry D.S.L."

Lois turned around with a smile. "Not my problem today Martha Kent. General taught me to be aggressive during times like these. He said I should have no pity as I get the job done. I have no pity. Well at least until 6 P.M." She gave a smile and walked out the door. This was going to be a long day.

He walked into the Daily Planet and inhaled the familiar newspaper scent and bustle of reporters. Perry gave him a smile. "Knew you'd be back Olsen."

He smiled politely towards Perry White his former boss. "I've come to-"

"Get your job back? Yeah, yeah. Your desk is in the corner Jimmy. Get to work."

"You're just going to accept me? Just like that?"

Perry raised an eye brow. "Do you want me to change my mind Olsen?"

"No sir."

"Get to work then."

"Sir?"

"What now?"

"I have a story for you."

"Already? Good work! Let's see it!"

"I meant it's in the works."

"Let's hear it then."

"I think Lex Luthor and Lionel Luthor had something to do with Chloe's death."

Perry mood change from happy to serious in a matter of seconds as he studied Jimmy over. "Get the proof and bring it in."

"Private! I said twenty more!" She yelled at his as he stopped in the middle of his lunges.

"I can't...breathe..." He put his hands on his head and took slow steady breaths. She watched him.

"Alright one break. You still have 20 more to go." She sat down in front of him.

"Don't you think you're pushing me a little too hard on the first day?"

"You haven't passed out or thrown up yet so no."

"I'm not in the army Lois."

"My names not Lois, Kent. D.S.L. Get it right. 30 more."

He got back up and started the lunges again, going as fast as he could to lessen the pain. He got done with the 30 and fell back to the ground, his legs and his groin muscles aching. He laid out on the grass and took in the cool air.

She bent over the top of him and smiled. "Not done yet! You've got laps to do mister!"

He looked at her like she was crazy. "Laps? How many?"

She looked at her stop watch. "You have 1 hour to get 3 laps in. Around the farm, the entire farm. Starting now!"

He grabbed her legs and knocked her over as she started to walk away. He got up and started his jog, laughing at her as she chased up behind him.

"Not funny Kent."

"Oh contraire! Very funny D.S.L." He kept up his jog as she ran along beside him.

"That's going to cost you Kent."

"It was worth it D.S.L."

She smirked at him. "I bet it was. I probably have a bruise on my butt now."

He stopped and turned around to look at her. "Oh really? Well I probably am going to be sore as hell tomorrow! But since you're going to have bruises..." He reached around, jerked her pants down and took off running. He wasn't very fast but he could still hide by the time she got them back up.

"SMALLVILLE!!!"

He reached the barn and went up the steps as fast as he could, pushing on the rail just enough to jump to the next one. He flopped down on the couch as she reached the top. "Never thought I'd be so happy to see this couch."

"You're lucky you're already hurt Smallville. I would so kill you right now for what you just did."

"Just checking to see if you had bruises D.S.L." He laughed again.

"Enough with the D.S.L. crap. It's 6:00. I'm Lois again."

"Thank God. Didn't think I could handle anymore of your bossy side!" He said sarcastically.

"Funny, Smallville. You're just a jokester today aren't you?"

"Have to have something to do with my time!"

She sat down on the arm of the couch and faced the window. He noticed her expression change.

"What's wrong?"

"Huh? Oh, nothing."

He sat up and scooted back. "Lois don't hide from me. Don't hide behind those walls."

She hesitated for a moment before sliding down on to the cushion beside him. She kept her eyes on one star in particular.

"Everyday when you were gone I'd sit here and pray to that star for you to come home or at least be safe. I'd fall asleep thinking about you. I'd have dreams about when we used to talk. I'd relive all the conversations we used to have and everything we used to fight about."

He grabbed her hand and held it in his. She never removed her trance. "I remember."

She looked into his eyes. "I keep forgetting that you could hear me. How did you know I was talking to you?"

"My hearing went on the fritz one day and I picked up on someone crying." He looked up to the star, unable to meet her eyes. "I listened and heard my name. I knew it was your voice. I had never heard you cry before. It scared me. I thought I'd never make it back alive to be with you, to make your crying stop." He met her eyes again. "You never annoyed me Lois, you kept me alive. You were the thing I waited for everyday. I stay awake long enough to make it to that time when I heard your voice, I'd fall asleep listening to your every word. You made me believe I would be ok. You gave me hope."

She smiled. "Never knew I was so important Smallville."

He laughed. "You know how to ruin a moment don't you?"

She shrugged her shoulders, "It's what I was born to do."

Clark got to thinking about their lives before he was captured. "Lois, what happened to your apartment over the Talon?"

He saw fear flash in her eyes and she quickly looked away. "Um, I couldn't afford the rent so I moved back here."

"What happened to your job?"

"I um...I kinda quit it." She mumbled and got off the couch.

"Why?"

She turned around at him frustrated. "Why? Because I could only think about you. I was so worried that while I was at work you'd show up at my apartment again that I just quit. I couldn't work when I wanted to look for you. For those two years all I did was look for you. I couldn't keep a job."

"Lois I can't believe you quit your job. You loved that job."

"Yeah well apparently you meant more to me than that job."

"I shouldn't have. You still had Oliver. What happened to that?"

She walked over to the window. "I don't want to talk about it."

He stood. "Well you need to, because for some reason Oliver turned to Lex and Lana and helped capture me."

She crossed her arms and looked at him angrily. "Are you saying I had something to do with it?"

He grabbed her arms and uncrossed them, trying to get her to open up to him. "I'm saying you probably know why he did leave." She jerked away from him. "Fine you know what? I don't know why I even bother with you Lois. You keep blocking people out; you're going to lose them." He walked down the steps and started to head towards the woods.

She watched him until out of the corner of her eye until she saw Lana running towards him. "OH HELL NO!"

Clark looked up and heard her, finally turning his attention to the edge of the woods. He saw what she had screamed about. Before he had time to turn Lana grabbed his arm and started pulling him away.

"Clark we have to go."

He tried to push her off. "I'm not going back with you Lana."

"We aren't going there. I swear. I have to show you something and talk to you." She looked over his shoulder and saw Lois running towards them. "Lois is coming, she'll never listen to me."

"What makes you think that I will?"

She pulled a needle from her bag causing him to jump back. It was filled with a metallic colored liquid that he had never seen before. "This will turn everything around. It's liquid lead. It can removed any trace of meteor rock in your system. But as to where I need to inject it, well...you'll have to be put under anesthetic or you could seriously hurt yourself. Or someone."

"Lana get away from him!" Lois pulled Clark back into her.

"Clark please! Just listen to me! Please!"

"Are you sure it will work?"

"Yes! Lead counter acts the meteor rock. I've already tested it."

Clark turned to Lois who was warily eyeing the needle. "She says that can remove any trace of kryptonite in my system. Maybe we should listen to her."

"What if this is just a trick? What if it will hurt you more?"

"It's just lead Lois. All it could do to him is remove the kryptonite." Lana pleaded.

Lois eyed the needle. "Liquid lead?"

"Yes."

"Where do you have to give it to him at?" Lana blushed and opened her mouth. Lois shook her head furiously. "Oh no. No. No. You've already messed with that enough." Clark looked at her, his eyes begging her for the chance to be pain free. She didn't know what it was like for him to be in constant pain. If this could help she would take the risk. "Alright."

He smiled. "Thank you Lois."

Lana started to dig through her purse again and Lois stopped her. "One condition. I give it to him."

Lana looked up with a laugh. "Lois you can't do that. You don't know where it goes or how to give it to him."

She smiled. "But you do. See you will be in the room with me while I give it to him. That way you can make sure everything goes right and I can make sure you don't try anything stupid." She held out her hand and Lana dropped the needle in it.

Clark looked at the needle. Words racing through his mind. 'Should I do this?' 'Could it kill me?' "Can we do this in the house?"

"Yes but I have to hurry. Lex will be looking for me if I am gone for too long. And I can't have him looking for you already."

Lois caught her final words and played them through her mind. "Already?"

Lana had hoped she had said it too fast for them to catch it but apparently not. "In 2 months we're planning on getting you back Clark. Me, Lex, Lionel and Ollie."

Lois scoffed and crossed her arms. "I chased Ollie off already."

"He came back." 'He was forced back by Lionel, he nearly killed him in the process. He's hanging just like Clark was, but not being tortured.'

Clark stepped forward. "How are you going to catch me?"

"Lex won't tell me. I just know that it has something to do with the red-k that Lex gave you."

-'Lex he can't breathe! STOP! You're going to kill him!"

She looked at the blood pressure gauge and it was soaring past 200/150. His skin was bleeding from the pores and his heart was beating 200 times a minute.

Lex was slowly injected red-k into his veins. He pulled the needle out when 10 cc was left and stood back. Clark's blood dripped down the sides of the table onto the floor.

"Turn off the green!" Lex screamed into the microphone and the white light flicked on. He continued convulsing rapidly. Lana screamed in the glass container she was locked inside. Clark's eyes were coursing red tears down his face, no coherent thoughts in his head. His pores clogged and swelled. His muffled screams where heard through the mask he wore seconds before her passed out.-

Clark turned away and looked at the barn. "I don't even remember that day." He whispered. He brought his hands to his face and sighed in frustration. "I remember bits and pieces but nothing else."

Lana looked at the needle Lois had in her hands. "The memories will come back. Just as vivid and painful as they were then."

"Then why risk it?" Lois said pulling away from her thoughts.

Clark turned to look at her." What do you mean?"

She examined the needle. "If this brings back the memories, is it really worth it? I mean is being pain free faster really that important to you? Is it worth going back to that place you nearly died in?"

He jerked his head back to Lana. "I died a few times."

She looked at him sympathetically, "Clark.."

"Don't 'Clark...' me! I don't want to hear it! It was your fault that happened! I remember that particular night!"

She stepped forward. "I was angry!"

"You didn't have the right to do that to me!"

Lois looked between them, realizing there was so much that she didn't know. She had never bothered to ask Clark, she thought it would be too painful for him to explain.

"Even Lex told you to stop but no 'CRANK IT UP ANOTHER NOTCH!'"

"Lex had nothing to do with that decision. That was all me! Don't you see that I regret it? I'm trying to make up for everything! I'm trying to redeem myself!"

And without an ounce of compassion towards her he screamed at the top of his lungs to in her face. "Your regret means NOTHING TO ME! There is no way to redeem yourself! You committed murder and brought me back just to do it all over again! I remember the blackness settled in your shadow. I remember the fear and pain and hunger and thoughts I had because of you. I remember wanting death to come and to never turn back. I remember praying you would have the mercy to get rid of me for good. BUT NO! Torturing me to the brink and causing my family pain was just too much fun!"

He staggered towards her and she pulled another needle full of kryptonite out of her purse and held it to his eye level. He dropped to the ground and writhed in pain. He began to beg like he had done so many times before.

"Please don't hurt me. I didn't mean it Lana. I'm sorry." She stepped closer and he began to scream. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! NO LANA! DON'T! PLEASE OH GOD PLEASE DON'T!"

She grabbed his face and yelled back. "This will kill you before you even get the other shot. You're right maybe I should put you out of your misery, good thing I brought this along!"

She felt a sharp blow to her back. She twisted around to see the leg of Lois Lane swinging toward her. It smashed into her face and she flew forwards smacking into the ground. Lois jumped on top of her and began punching her face with everything she had. She ten wrapped one hand around her head and placed the other on her jaw.

"I can kill you in a matter of seconds. You shut up. You listen. You don't die." Lana stopped wiggling under her as she whispered coldly into her ear. "You give me that mother fucking needle now." Lana just sat there allowing herself to grin widely. Lois tightened her grip on her head. "NOW DAMMIT!" The needle dropped from her hand and rolled onto the grass. Lois stomped it into oblivion with her hands still around Lana's head. "Now. Be a good slut and stand. You try anything stupid and I'll beat your pretty little face in. Got it?"

Lana spit in her face. Lois jumped up off of her and Lana came up with her. Lana swung her right arm towards her face and Lois blocked it with her forearm. Her other hand when straight up Lana's gut. Lana wrapped her arms around Lois's neck and kneed her in the stomach repeatedly knocking her away. Lois skillfully dropped to the ground and spin kicked her legs out from under her. Right as Lana fell Lois caught her knee under her back and lifted her up in the air. She slammed her against the ground with all her might. Lana's body crinkled as she passed out.

Lois let out a sigh of seeing her easily defeated. She turned and saw Clark's mouth hanging open. Smiled at the site. "Catching fly's Smallville?"

He shook out of his reverie and shut his mouth. "That was incredible Lois."

"Ha ha. You should see me in a martial arts tournament! When you get better I am so fighting you!" She laughed.

"You won't stand a chance then Lois."

"Ah but I know you won't hurt me!" She lightly slapped him on the shoulder as she walked past him. "Now help me tie her up! Chop chop Smallville. Haven't got all day."

He smiled at her with a goofy smile. He was beginning to feel like his old self again. He started towards her when he felt his feet move faster. He blinked as he shot past her. He turned around and saw the shocked expression on her face. He pulled his body back quickly and stopped right before he hit the staircase.

She jogged up beside him and let out a laugh. "Nice super-speed there Smallville. Now go watch our captive. Don't want her to escape!" She tugged the rope taught in her hands and gave him a cocky smile.

They had her bound in a matter of minutes and they laughed the entire time.

"That's what I called tied to a chair!" She stood back and admired their, her, work.

"Really? You think?"

"You got any more duct tape Smallville?"

"Lois that's 6 rolls and 2 ropes. She's not getting loose."

She laughed. "Oh I'm not worried about that. This is just for my amusement!"

"I noticed!" He turned and saw the shot sitting on the counter next to the towels, water and anesthetic.

"Nervous Smallville?"

He turned and smiled at her. "A woman who has never operated or injected for that matter is about to inject something into a very sensitive area of my body while I'm knocked out. Nope not at all." He gave her a sarcastic smile.

She raised her hands up in the air. "HEY!! I helped Chloe operate on you!"

He snorted. "Helped? If I do remember correctly you almost got sick watching her do that."

"Did not."

"Did to."

"Did not."

"Did to."

"Did not."

"Did to."

She turned away. "Whatever."

"Ha ha I won!"

"1 in a million Smallville. Probably won't happen again."

"Ah but the problem with that is that it did happen so it will happen again."

"No it won't."

"Yes it will."

"No it won't."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"Will you shut up!"

"Anything for you Lois." He staggered past her and whispered in her ear. "Yes."

He laughed as she held herself still. He loved having the edge he had but he knew it wouldn't last for long. Once he got everything back she would be able to get physical with him.

He looked her up and down as she touched up the tape. He could still feel all those feelings coursing through his heart and rapidly beating at his soul. He consciously squeezed the counter a little tighter and bit his lip as she bent over. His eyes began to burn and he knew what was about to happen. He tried to push those thoughts away and regain control but every time he pushed another one rose to the surface. That night she stepped out naked giving his just enough time to get a buzz off of her newly exposed skin. The night she laid across his lap, her breast as eye level, her butt slowly grinding against him. The first time he saw her in one of his plaid shirts with nothing else under it.

His vision turned red and he covered his eyes with his hands but blocking it only made the pain worse. He blindly pushed himself to the door and knocked over a chair in the process. Lois turned to see him struggling so she tried to remove his hands from his eyes. He kept pushing to the door and she got the message and led him out. The second he stepped outside he jumped off the porch and removed his hands. Lois wandered p behind him slowly to see what was happening.

"Lois get back!" She stepped away from him unknowing of what was happening. She looked at his eyes, they glowed a mad color of red before what looked like wavering heat shot from them. She followed the beam and watched as the field before them lit in a raging fire. She looked back at him as he rubbed his eyes and shook his head. He looked at the field in a state of panic.

"Oh crap. Crap. Crap." He turned to Lois. "Get the hose Lois. There isn't much I can do."

She turned the water on full blast while grabbing the hose. 5 minutes later the fire was out but the field was still smoking. Clark had sat down on the porch swing thinking about the new power he had gained again and tried to remember how to control it. Lois walked up beside him and sat on the swing. Her presence causing him to jump.

"Was that one of your powers?"

"Hm? Oh yeah. Heat vision."

"What caused it?" He turned his head away and looked at the field. "Hey, no. It's ok Smallville. You can talk to me. That's what I'm here for!"

"It's kind of embarrassing Lois."

"So is the mole on my-" He looked at her curiously. "Arm but I got over it."

He laughed a little. "Nice Lois."

She smiled. "Well where did you expect it to be?"

His smile dropped. "That's what caused it."

She turned her head to the side. "What? I missed that didn't I?"

He sighed and ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "Thinking about...stuff...caused it."

She laughed. "Are you serious? That's awesome!"

He looked at her and smiled. "Why is that awesome?"

"Because if I do this I can know immediately if I get the right reaction from you." She stood up in front of him and began to sway and hum.

He started getting nervous. "Lois what are you doing?"

She smiled and reached for the hem of her shirt. She pulled it past her belly button and watched his eyes. 'Nothing yet.' She pulled it over her head and turned around. She slowly unhooked her bra and dropped it before turning around to an open mouthed Clark. He gulped and his eyes glowed that same color of red. She hit the floor just in time as the chair behind her went up in flames. She grabbed the hose and put it out before slipping her clothes back on. She laughed the entire time.

"NOT funny Lois! I could have burnt the house down."

"Hope you get that under control before we have sex. You'll burn the farm down then!"

"Still not funny Lois."

His mood changed from cheerful to vacant. "Ok. Spill."

"It's nothing Lois. I'm just..."

-He felt a small tug that brought tears to his eyes. He had no where to run, no where to hide from her as she tried to capture him into her trance. She slammed him against the wall, grabbing a place she had touched before. He pushed her off of him and she smacked into the wall across the room.

"Your memories told us sex triggered it Clark. So trigger it again!"

"No Lana!"

"Why? I can tell you want me." She pulled a knife from the case in the wall.

"I never want you!" He screamed. She threw the knife and it coursed through the wall right beside his head. She pulled out a bag full of them.

"Don't make me turn the meteor rock on Clark. Just use your heat vision." She pulled out another knife and began to toy with it.

"NO!"

She threw them repeatedly at him. One hitting his leg, one his arm, one his stomach and one grazed his head. "You're naked and defenseless. Give in." She cornered him again.

"Will raping me help you sleep at night Lana? You want one more piece of me before Lex takes it all away?" He grabbed her face. "Huh?"

She stabbed his hand with another knife. "You don't touch me got it?"

He laughed as he pulled the knife from his hand. "Did I get to you? Does it hurt to know I don't answer to your every whim like I used to? Does it hurt to know how much I fucking hate you! Does it hurt to know I only have eyes for LOIS!!! DOES IT HURT LANA!!!"

Her face was streaked with tears and mascara as she back against the wall. She shook her head and yelled to the guards. "FLIP ON THE LIGHTS!" His eyes widened and he hit the ground from loss of breath. She ran out of the room mumbling under her breath and the guards turned out the lights.

He smiled yet again as the pain faded. He looked up to the ceiling and sent out his heart felt words. "I love you Lois Lane."-

He looked into the kitchen and watched her squirm as she tried to break free. One part of him wanted to kill her for every time she had caused him pain. One part of him said it wasn't right to do what she did to him to her.

"I'm not letting her go unscathed if that's what you're thinking."

He smiled. It wouldn't surprise him if she could read his mind. "It still isn't right to have her tied up like that."

"Why not? She deserves it." She looked at him and saw the pain in her words. "Alright. We'll let her go as soon as you get that shot. But as of right now I don't trust her."

"Sounds good to me." He flashy her a smile, his dimples showed brighter. His cheeks seemed more full.

"How much did you eat today Smallville?"

"Got down 2 plates."

"Better than usual!"

They walked through the door and Lana looked up at them. "Can we get this over with already?"

Lois smiled. "Of course. Clark you ready?"

He let out a sigh and gave a shaky smile. "Ready as I'll never be."

She play smacked him on the shoulder. "Nice. Ok so what has to happen?"

"He has to be naked. The shot has to be given in the top center of his sack."

Lois laughed nervously. "How much anesthetic do I give him? And how much of the shot?"

"Just enough to knock him out. Just get the rag wet a little bit. And you have to give him the shot slowly, all of it."

Lois and Clark looked at the shot. "Oh boy." They said at the same time. They looked at each other and smiled. Some things will never change.

Clark wrapped his arms around Lois and tried his best to hug her. "Good luck Lois. Don't get too lost down there."

She laughed. "Oh you never know. There might be something enticing along the way." She handed him a towel and he limped away from the room. She looked to Lana. "Why does he limp?"

Lana looked up at her guiltily. "Let's see. That was day 233? I remember writing that down."

Lois looked at her with her head cocked to the side. "You have records." She said flatly.

"Yeah. Lex wanted to know everything. Funny enough we never got a semen sample. Anyways."

-Screams...the kryptonite bat swinging...shattering bones...-

"I can't talk about that. You'll have to ask Clark. That's something Lex did." She wiggled around a little bit. "How many rolls of tape are on this?"

Lois smiled proudly. "6 roll and 2 ropes."

Lana smiled. "Nice touch."

Clark walked back in the room with simply a towel on. They both stared at him. "What? It's not like I've got something to look at. Unless you have a skin and bones fetish."

Lois laughed. "Lana over here does."

"Shut up Lois." He said.

She looked at the table and spread the towel on it. "How are you going to get up there?"

He grabbed the stools. "Like this." He pushed himself up, his arms shaking the whole time.

Lois's mouth dropped. "Ok. Smallville I don't understand you. Two days ago you were barely moving and now you can get down and up stairs, push yourself up on tables-"

Lana butted in. "His tissue rejuvenates at a rate 10 times faster than ours. In a week he should be lifting trucks again."

Lois looked at her curiously. "Did you find that out by deteriorating him?"

"No. When we first got him we ran a lot of tests to see how he works. God, you should see his lab work. It is so complex even our best doctors couldn't read it."

"That's because my race was just an advanced version of humans I think. Just think about you in a million years." He said.

Lana looked at him with a questioning look. "How did you know that Clark?"

He shrugged it off. "It's just something I've always known."

"I thought..."

"Lois I just knew."

Lois got it. "OK! Shot time!"

He lay back on the table. She picked up the anesthetic at the front of the table and looked at it before meeting his eyes.

He gave her a world famous smile. "You can do this Lois. I have faith in you."

She put her hand on his face. "I don't want to hurt you."

"You're going to have to."

She dipped the rag in the solution and held it up to his chin. He looked it then back into her eyes as she started to speak. "I..." She stopped herself. She wanted so badly to say she loves him but that made this seem like the end. Like she would never see him again. She bit her lip and whispered. "Bye Smallville," She placed it over his nose and moth and she watched his chest rise and fall before his eyes fluttered shut.

She turned to Lana. "How did that work?"

"It has a super small trace of kryptonite in it otherwise it wouldn't have worked."

Lois walked around to the other end of the table and sat her cleaned hands on the towel. She let out a breath and pulled it loose exposing his member to her. She looked at Lana who had a trance on it and her anger flared. "HEY! You're here to help not get a peep show!"

Lana blushed. "Sorry."

Lois picked up the iodine and rubbed it around at the area of injection. 'This is awkward. What if he was awake? Would he moan...LOIS!' With a shaky hand she moved his member to the side and touched the tip of the needle to his sack.

"Ok Lois right there."

"Right here?"

"Yeah. Lois you have to put it in all the way and release slowly."

She blushed. 'Damn perverted mind.' She pushed the tip and it slid right through. She kept pushing till the needle was all the way in and then put her thumb on the top and slowly pushed down. A minute later every trace was gone. She pulled the needle out and the blood started to flow. She put some cloth on it and waited for it to clog. She wrapped the towel back around his waist and waited.

'God I hate waiting.'


	15. Green

Chapter 15: Green

-"Oh God Clark! Harder!"

She ripped the bed sheets as she pulled them, the tension in her body becoming too much for her to handle. She was gripping him with everything she had she only hoped it would be enough to get him there.

His hand ran up her body and squeezed her breast so lightly she whimpered. He raised up on his elbows and she wrapped her legs around him tight. Her hips were thrusting into him as he almost went into super speed. He had never wanted to hurt her before but he couldn't refuse her cries.

He bit down on her neck right at the spot that made her moan every time. His hand left her breast and slid down her arm. He grabbed her hand and she squeezed it tightly. He kissed her, plunging his tongue deep in her mouth until he felt a warmth spread around him. He pulled back in just enough time to listen to her scream his name. He only wanted it that much more, he wanted to hear her scream it again.

He began to pump harder, God he was so close-

His eyes opened immediately, his breathing erratic and sweat rolling down his body. He sat up and tried to take in his surrounding when a sickening feeling hit the pit of his stomach. Lois jumped to his side and made a grab for his hand but as soon as he felt the touch he pulled away. The memories from his dream still vivid in his head.

He scooted to the end of the counter and she helped him off. He ran the best he could to the down stairs bathroom and barely made it to the toilet in time as the green fluid started pouring from his mouth. Lois squatted down beside him and rubbed his back trying to comfort him.

She knew his would happen. Lana had told her after she gave the shot that the kryptonite would pass from wherever it could.

He had emptied everything he could and he fell back out of breath, clutching his now burning throat. Lois flushed it down and wet a wash cloth before handing it to him to clean up with. He starred at it for a second before wiping off his mouth.

"God I need a shower."

She turned and smiled at him. "Ok. You go see if Jr. works alright?"

He looked up at her. "I thought it would take a while for that shot to work."

She smiled a wide smile and pointed at his pants. "That's not a banana."

He blushed and put his hand over it the best he could. He hadn't even felt this coming, which was strange. He watched her walk out the door and he stood, slipping the rest of his clothes off before stepping in the shower. He turned the hot water on full blast and let it cascade down his body.

He felt a small pain below and knew that his body was already working on the problem. The smile that had played across his face quickly dropped as the familiar sickness rose. His body bent him over and forced him to dry heave making water be sucked into his lungs. The kryptonite poured from his mouth as he heard the shower curtain swing open and a pair of arms wrap around his waist to hold him steady. The blood soon fell as the kryptonite ate at his throat, she pulled him away from the water. She patted his back lightly until it was over, making sure he wouldn't choke.

She pulled him up enough for him to stand and looked into his eyes. They were glazed over and blank, but shifting ever so slightly. "You ok Smallville?'

He shook his head and looked up at her. "I'm tired. I just want to go to bed."

"You need to finish your shower don't you?"

He picked up a wash cloth and she removed her hands from him, but as soon as she did he fell forward. "Alright Smillville. You hold still. I'll be in in a second." She helped him sit down on the edge of the tub and made sure to keep an eye on his as she stripped down to her under wear. She looked down Baby blue with hearts, then jumped in with him.

"Never thought I would see something girly on Lois Lane."

She smiled. "Wait till you see my lacey thongs!". She stated jokingly.

She pulled him up to her. "Don't make me think about the Lois. I'll get sick again."

"Well..." She put some shampoo in her hand and started lathering his hair. "How am I supposed to wash him?"

He shifted in her arms nervously and looked down at himself. "Um...maybe I can do that?"

She laughed. "Don't want me touching you Smallville?"

"No it's not that...I just don't know what will happen if you do."

"Suit yourself. I'll hold you up. You wash your body."

She handed him the cloth and he starred at it for a second. "Lois?"

"Hm?"

"Can you get my back for me? It's kinda hard to reach and...yeah..."

She took it from him and washed his back then handed it back. He cleaned everything except the trouble area which he continued to stare at. She looked over his shoulder and watched his hand hover over it.

"Yeah looking at it will not get it clean."

He shook out of his thoughts. "This is awkward."

"Oh good Lord! Just wash already." She noticed him shaking as he did and couldn't help but wonder why. Of course she watched, she is a girl. "You feel sick Smallville?"

"No. I think I've done all I can for now." She ran the water over him and rinsed him off before stepping out of the shower and grabbing him a towel. When she handed it to him she noticed his stare adverted away from her making her laugh.

"You got a problem over there?"

He quickly wrapped the towel around himself and continued to look away. "It's...um...getting cold in here?" He looked over at her and looked away again.

She looked down and realized why he was looking away. Water + Cold Hardened nipples + uncomfortable situation. She grabbed a towel and dried off, then turned him around and helped him out so she could change.

He made his way shakily up the stairs and found a pair of boxers lying on his bed. He slipped them on carefully, not wanting to relive the sickness and laid back. He looked out the window to the star he remembered the most and whispered. "God I wish she was here. I miss her already." He snuggled down into the sheets and awaited a sleep he didn't think would come.

But at the same time the door crept open and she slipped into the room. She slipped under the covers undetected and whispered in his ear. "Wish granted."

He turned and looked at her, a smile plastered on both faces. He leaned up and kissed her on the cheek before pulling her into him. She rested her head on his shoulder as she thought this was the most comfortable she had ever been.

"No poking me Smallville."

"No grinding me Lois."

"Night."

"Mhm." She looked up at him and smiled. 'God he's so cute when he sleeps.'

"He's never going to believe that! I can't just say that I talked to you!"

"Why not? Talking never hurt anyone." He smiled manically.

"Lionel I can't talk to you anymore, he won't like it." She protested with her arms folded over her chest.

"Martha."

She shook her head. "No. You hurt my son."

"Ah. But I saved your life."

She lifted her head defiantly. "I know that."

"I told you about your son. I kept you informed while you were hurt."

"Then you brought yours back to life with his blood."

"Martha he's my son and if I can find a way to save him I will."

She took a step back away from him. "He tried to kill Clark!"

"That's irrelevant now."

"No!! It's not!"

He grabbed her arm. "You listen to me. Your son is free and is becoming healthy again."

She attempted to jerk away but her efforts were in vain. "But he's still hurt Lionel! And you can't take back telling them his secret."

He let her going. "I already have."

"What?"

"You wouldn't be here if you hadn't forgiven me."

She turned and ran out. A voice from the shadows spoke up.

"What are you going to do with her dad?"

"Play her for everything she has of course."

"Good."

"Still no reactions Lex?"

"Not yet. Hopefully there won't be."

Lionel walked past his son and stroked a large glass container. "Hopefully. You never know with that blood work."

"Clarkie! Wakey...wakey!" He felt a hand run across his face. He peeped one eye open and was greeted by an eager pair of hazels.

"That's something I can get used to."

She turned her head and looked at him. "What?"

"Waking up to your face."

She smiled then gave him a playful slap. "Suck up. Come on breakfast is ready!"

He groaned as he sat up. "Did you make it?"

She turned from the door with a smile. "Yep! Bacon, eggs, toast, sausage, hash browns and orange juice. Oh let's not forget the coffee for me!"

"Lois I don't think I'm that hungry."

She laughed. "Don't worry Smallville I learned how to cook while you were away. I mean I did have to feed myself so I had to make it edible."

He raised an eyebrow and got up. "You better not poison me Lois."

She winked at him as she turned. "Would never dream of it Smallville."

She opened the door again and ran down the steps back into the kitchen.

He slipped on his clothes and walking with ease down the steps, to his surprise Lois was standing with a smirk at the bottom.

"Told you those lunges would help build up your muscles."

"Lois you made me do 1,000."

She chuckled, "And better yet you get to do 2,000 today!" She walked into the kitchen and sat down at the island where two plates where already made.

He set down on the stool beside her and stared at his plate, almost afraid to eat it. "You know looks are deceiving."

"Smallville if you don't eat it I will. It's good, I promise!"

He picked up a piece of bacon, with surprise that it wasn't burnt and took a small bite. More than edible, it was delicious. He reached back up to take another larger bite when suddenly it fell from his hand. His head started pounding, surges of pain coursing throughout him. He threw his hands over his ear trying to stop it but it was no use. He flipped backwards out of the stool, Lois catching his head right before he hit the floor.

"Smallville? What's wrong? Come on it wasn't that bad was it?"

He started rolling around trying anything to get the pain to stop. When he rolled on to his stomach the pain dulled for a millisecond. He looked up to Lois whose hand was covering her mouth.

"What's wrong with me Lois?"

She ran and got a towel and handed it to him. "Breathe through your mouth Clark."

He did as he was told. He felt tears rolling down his cheeks moments later, but he wasn't crying. He watched as Lois tried to wipe them away with her hand, only to wince upon rubbing it.

"You're bleeding kryptonite Clark. It's cutting me."

He grabbed her hand away from his face. "Go wash your hands it could be poison to you too."

She jumped up and washed her hands. By the time she was done he had already sat up, the bleeding apparently stopping. He struggled to stand, feeling tired all over again.

His eyes rolled back into his head. "Tired."

"Smallville?" His world started spinning around him.

"Clark!" His mom ran to his side and grabbed him. "What's wrong with him?"

"He's blee-"

His eyes shut slowly and he fell limp in Martha's arms.

"CLARK!" She screamed and shook him.

Lois grabbed her. "don't shake him! It could make it worse. We need to get him to the couch." They lifted with ease and sat him on the couch.

"What's going on Lois?" Martha was visibly shaking as she stroked his forehead.

"He's bleeding and throwing up all the kryptonite in his body. It's the side affects of a shot that I gave him yesterday."

"Where did you get a shot?"

"Lana." Martha opened her mouth but Lois raised her hand to stop her. "It's doing what she said it would do. I know. I usually don't trust her but this time was different. I had to with all that in him he wouldn't get better. It's helping him, slowly but surely."

"Lois I hope you're right."

"So do I. I'm going to the barn for a second, do mind watching him?"

"Sure, no problem."

She walked out the door, went straight up to the loft and sat down on the sofa. Her old habits pulled her there. Out of the corner of her eye she saw it. The photo that tore her apart.

"Oh God Chloe." She pulled it to her chest and let her tears fall. The memories of Chloe life started to flash before her eyes. Al those times she had spent with her, all those conversations they had.

She held the picture in front of her. "You're really gone this time aren't you?"

She studied the picture that Martha had taken last summer. They were sitting on top on Clark who was laid out on a bale of hay. Lois was holding his hands in the air and Chloe's arms were wrapped around his legs. Both girls were laughing and Clark was show his award winning smile. They were in their bikinis and had chased him down. Some how in the middle of it all they had managed to get his shirt off of him. She remembers sitting on his torso and feeling the muscles rippling under her as he took each breath. Chloe had 'accidentally' looked down his shorts at that point and was smiling at what she saw.

She laughed and rubbed Chloe's face in the picture.

Chloe had admitted that Jr. was a sight to behold. Lois had told her that Clark Jr. could please all with just a sight. They continued back and forth knowing Clark was just outside the door listening to their every word. When they finally let up a bit and walked out, Clark was sitting at the table, his face blood red. Chloe said something that made her laugh so hard...

She frowned. What did Chloe say? Slowly she was losing the memories. Slowly she was losing the visualization of her. She missed her voice and her advice. She missed Chloe.

"I never really got the chance to say goodbye to you. I've been so busy trying to keep Clark healthy that I haven't even thought about you. God I'm a bad person."

She wiped the tears from her eyes and let out a strangled laugh. "You know it's funny. Clark told me I should have never quit my job, just like you did. I guess it would have helped if I had told you guys that I was fired by Oliver after he bought out the Inquisitor. Clark asked what happened to my, our, apartment Chloe too."

She let out a sigh. "How do I tell him about that? I keep telling myself I shouldn't have to because it's in the past. But...I don't know how he does it! He makes me feel guilty about not confronting him about it."

She wiped away another set of tears. "And maybe I should be. It kinda was my fault wasn't it?" She thought for a second then shook her head. "No. No. you told me it wasn't. I didn't start that fire." She placed the picture to her heart. "I love you Chlo. I miss you more than anything. I hope you're doing ok up there because I'm a mess without you."

She walked back down the steps down to the house and stood at the door. Through the screen she could see Martha rubbing Clark's cheek. As much as she loved him she couldn't take him being sick anymore. Her heart needed a break other wise she was going to explode. She had only had one good nights sleep in 2 years. It was time for a short leave.

She grabbed her purse on the counter and pulled out her keys. "Mrs. Kent?"

"Yeah Lois?"

"I'm going out for a few days."

Martha stood and walked over to her. "Lois, you ok?"

Lois's voice started shaking. "I need a break here Mrs. Kent. I can't stand to see him hurting anymore. I have to do something. I can't be strong for him, if I can't be strong for myself. I'm tired, I just need to go."

Martha gave her a hug. "Bye baby. Come back when you're ready." She kissed her cheek. Lois smiled. 'Just like old times.' "And plus I think he needs to stay away from you for a while. He's becoming dependent on you for everything. I expected him to be but he need to learn to take care of himself again. You've become too mushy to refuse him Mrs. Lane." She winked and Lois smiled even wider.

"I'm just going to run up stairs and grab a few things." She came back down with a duffle bag of clothes and ran out the door. She knew if she looked at Clark she wouldn't want to leave, she had to run while she could.

Clark woke up not too long after Lois left.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

He smiled at her weakly. "Pretty nasty. But my body feels a little better." She handed him some water and he sipped it gratefully. He started looking around the house. "Where's Lois?"

"She left."

Clark spit the water in his mouth across the room. "What? Why?"

Martha took the cup from him and sat it on the table. "She's stressed and needs a break."

"She didn't have to leave."

"Yes she did Clark." Clark looked at her questioningly. "Clark, Lois is tired. She searched for you for 2 years. She's barely gotten any sleepy. She's not able to recuperate like you. I think it's taking a toll on her nerves."

"She could talk to me about it."

"Does she need to?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're both at points in your lives where you both are what you never wanted to be. Of all my years of raising you, never once did you want to be dependent and token care of. You always wanted to do things yourself. You took pride in being strong and in those moments when you were weak you hated every second of it. When Lois was younger the one thing she hated was taking care of her sister, becoming a mother she wasn't ready to be. She was depended on constantly and didn't have time to just be Lois. And a lot like you she hates feeling weak. Hers is emotional weakness though."

"From what? I know me being gone-"

"From watching the man she loves suffer and know there is nothing she can do to help him." Martha walked out of the room and left him to think.

He got up off the couch and walked into the back yard. He sat in the brownish grass and looked at the field around him. The wind blew around him, stirring up the leaves from the fall. The orange and red circled him before floating out and upwards. He walked around into the barn where he found his dad's old weights. He picked up the 100 lb. dumbbell and nearly fell over. His arms were shaking as he pulled them up. His strength would alternate between making it easy and hard. He actually broke a sweat. Sweat? It takes a lot for Clark Kent to sweat. With one final pull he sat it down and wiped off his forehead.

He heard foot steps entering the barn.

"Hey CK."

"Jimmy? Hey! What are you doing out here?"

"Just came looking for you CK. I was wanting..." He rounded the corner and looked at him. "For a guy who has been gone for 2 years you don't look so good. Chloe never got the chance to tell me what happened."

Clark shook his head. "Well Jimmy, it's probably something she didn't want to talk about."

"What happened to you CK? I mean I remember you as the big guy, Mr. Stud I guess."

Clark laughed. "A lot happened to me in those 2 years."

Jimmy shuffled around awkwardly. "Well um, I came here to ask you something about Lex."

Clark looked at him curiously. "Depends."

"I'm writing a story. Which is weird, I'm a photographer but anyways. An expose on Lex. I think, well I have a hunch that he has committed a serious crime. Do you know where I can start or anything?"

Clark looked at him and thought carefully. "Jimmy. Lex has done so many things, I can't just lead you straight to one without showing you them all."

Jimmy smiled. "I don't need a full story, just a clue."

"Look Jimmy. It's way too dangerous to get involved with the Luthors. You can't just get information without expecting them to come after you."

"I do expect them to. I just thought you would want to help."

"Jimmy, I can't put my self in that position." Clark walked towards the other end of the barn.

"Can you give me anything?"

He stopped. "Look into Lana's name. And try to avoid the files listed under 471-22-2222. But if you find anything bring it to me first alright?"

"You're the best CK."

Clark resumed his lifting until night fell, getting closer to his goal of lifting more than he thought possible for his current predicament. When he finally went back in the house he had no desire to eat. He simply went up stairs and took a shower.

Right as soon as he got into the bed he heard the phone ring. A few seconds later his mom called up to him.

"Clark honey it's for you!"

He walked down the stairs and picked up the cordless, then walked back up the stairs to talk.

"Hello?"

"Took you long enough Smallville."

He stopped right before he hit the bed. "Lois." He whispered breathlessly. He hadn't thought about her since she had left. He worked so he wouldn't have to. "How are you?"

"Well I just slept 6 hours at some motel and was planning to go at it again but I thought I would call and check in first."

"Where are you?" He had to know. He missed her.

"If I told you that, you would come up here. You have to stay put Smallville, running can't be good for you yet." They sat in silence for a few seconds. "So what did you do all day without me?"

"I lifted weights."

"All day? How much?"

"Not as much as I used to. I think 250." He said disappointedly.

"All day? I wish I could bench that much all day. Crap!"

"Lois to me that is nothing. I used to be able to catch a building or stop trains, now I can do what I could do when I was 10."

"Wow."

"It's not that amazing Lois." He wasn't trying to be modest, he was seriously disappointed with himself.

"To mere mortals it is!"

"If you knew what it was like to lift the world and all you could do was lift 250 you would be disappointed to."

"True. Good point."

"Jimmy came over today."

"Really? How's he doing?"

"Good actually. He's writing an expose on Lex, asked me for help."

"WHAT! What did you say to him?"

I told him to look into Lana. Wait...what happened to Lana last night? She was there when I was put under."

"Not important. What did you tell him about you?"

"I told him the code and to not look into it. What did you do with her Lois?"

"Smallville that's not important."

"Did you hurt her?"

"Nope."

"Did you put her in danger?"

"If she is in danger then it is her own fault."

"Lois-"

"Smallville I didn't hurt her. I promise."

"I'll trust you. Just this once."

She laughed. "You trusted me last night."

"Yeah and look at me, puking my guts out." He laughed.

"I'm so sorry Clark." She said sincerely.

"For what?"

"Leaving you like I did."

"It's ok Lois."

"I could have at least said goodbye or something."

"Lois I understand why you left. You don't have to come back until you are ready."

She went silent. "I cried all day Clark." She whispered.

"Why?" He said as carefully as he could.

"I miss Chloe."

He leaned back into his bed and fought tears in his eyes. "So do I."

"I found that photo of the 3 of us in the loft this morning. I guess that's what made me want to leave. There's too many memories of her. Too many memories of you."

"Me?"

"The healthy, happy, brooding, flannel farm boy I used to know."

"That's still me Lois."

She got quiet again. "No it's not."

"I'm still the same old Clark."

"No. The old Clark I could read like a book. You've got so many new walls and secrets. When you were talking to Lana yesterday I had no idea what you were talking about. I hate feeling left out like that. And you've got so much pain now that I could never comprehend."

"And seeing me hurting and knowing that you can't do anything about it is killing your heart."

"Yeah." She sniffled. "Clark as much as I want to help you I can't. I don't know anything about your physiology. I don't know what could help you."

"Yes you do."

"No Clark I don't."

"Your love helps me. I know you can't physically help me like you want to but just your love...It's what keeps me from giving up hope. You're my strength Lois."

"You've said that so many times."

"It's the truth."

"Well my love can't be that strong, I can't get you to be open with me." This time he got quiet. "See?"

"Lois it's not easy to talk about."

"And the longer you wait the more it'll hurt." She said in an agitated tone.

His anger flared. "Well maybe you should take your own advice."

"Ok fine. I guess we just won't talk then."

She hung up. He threw his phone across the room. It began to ring again and he didn't answer. He heard his mom answer downstairs and he covered his head with the covers.

"Clark you ok? Lois has called back 2 times already."

"I don't care. I'm tired."

"You two get in a fight?"

"Mom..."

"Clark you two don't need to get distant."

"She left mom. Her choice. She doesn't want to talk to me. She's calling to rub it in my face and I don't have to put up with her bull."

Martha got up off the bed and walked out of the room. Her son had changed. He's angrier than he used to be, he used to never stay angry at anyone for long and now he holds grudges. Lana twisted his mind in there. He used to be so understanding.

"Why does everything have to be different now?" She asked the air. And to her surprise it gave her an answer.

"He's in pain Martha Kent."

"I know he's in physical pain Jor-el."

"He's emotionally hurt also. There are memories from his past he can't remember for a reason."

"Like what?"

"He suppressed them all in his mind while he slept. He tried to avoid any pain he could. The suppression is failing Martha Kent."

"What will happen to him?"

"His fears will be increased."

"There is nothing I can do."

"No one can help him. If Kal-el wants to talk he will, forcing him will make the flow of kryptonite stronger."

"You're saying the kryptonite is stored in the memories?"

"Some of it is. He lost consciousness again this morning because he forced himself to. He blocked the kryptonite from exiting to keep his mind safe. He knows what he is doing."

"Suppressing the kryptonite itself can't be good for him."

"Hence he passed out. I the lets all the memories out at once he would be too overloaded."

She hit the wall. "Why is he always having his mind messed with?"

"The mind is the easiest part of the body to tamper with."

"What about Lois? Couldn't she help him?"

"Lois Lane has to be on her own for now. She needs time to cope with loss. Dealing with human emotions is never easy."

"Clark has human emotions. He was raised by us." She took offense.

"That is why Kal-el will become weak soon. Your human emotio9n may make his heart the strongest but it makes his mind the weakest."

"Did you make Lois leave?"

"I did play a role in that yes."

"Jor-el how can you do that to him? He needs her!"

"Lois Lane was breaking, just as you told my son earlier. Her soul was not intact. No matter how much she faked it, her fatigue was going to kill her. She will be back soon."

"Is she in the fortress?"

"She will end up here. She loves my son too much to not try to help him."

"Take care of her Jor-el."

"Take care of Kal-el Martha Kent."

"471-22-2222 keeps popping up. Crap. CK told me not to look into it but what can it hurt?"

He questioned himself and the computer. He clicked the document and read the following:

'Test subject doesn't submit to tests willingly.

7:03 P.M.

Hearing recorded to scatter. No one location identified.

Day 173- skin has not healed after prolonged exposure.

10:06 A.M.- More parts of the brain effected by procedures. Subjects information recall is slowing.

Emotions now control the whole.

Subject cannot walk, the legs are still pocketed with sample 272.

Eyes have dulled.

Many powers are now gone or fading.'

Jimmy read the information quickly. "Test subject? They have another meteor freak!" He printed it out and stuck it into a folder. He opened the rest of the documents read after the first and found the last ones written had the same words.

'Subject is dying. No more research can be conducted. The name Lois Lane is the only thing permanently embedded in what's left of the mind.'

Jimmy had to read it twice, something started clicking in his mind. He quickly opened the 1st document recorded and read it.

'Name: Kal-el

Origin: Currently unknown

Age: 20 yrs.

Blood: Unreadable by scientists

Powers: X-ray vision, heat vision, super breath, super hearing, invulnerability, super strength and lightning speed.

Allergies: Meteor rock

Code: 471-22-2222

Test subject captured: November 18, 2006. 7:03 P.M.'

Jimmy's pen fell from his mouth with a thud.

"That's when Clark disappeared. Oh God. Clark's the test subject. They captured him!"

He printed everything and carried it with him as he jumped into the car. He had to find Clark and give him the papers.

"You were gone for 2 years because Lex had you. He tested on you and you died. No wonder you're smaller than me." He looked at the 1st page again and read: origins currently unkown.

"You can't be an alien. You just can't be."

"I don't know how you stand it in here Luce. It's so..."

"Much like a jail cell?"

They smiled and hugged.

"I'm assuming Clark's back and he's ok?"

Lois sat down on the bench. 'He's back yeah."

Lucy leaned up against the wall. "Well that was half of the question."

Lois looked up at her with a blank expression. "Um...I don't know how he is." She shrugged and gave a doubtful smile.

"And why would that be? I mean for 2 years the guy is gone, no one knows where he was. You find him, lose him and get him back. And for some reason you're not attached at the hip?"

"I can't stand being around him anymore! It's killing me to see this man, he's not Clark anymore Luce." She bit her nail.

"Not Clark? Right. There's an imposter in your house."

"No I'm serious. Something's wrong with his mind or something."

"Well Lo he was tortured for 2 years. It was bound to happen. He's not just going to snap out of it like you want him to."

"I know he's in there."

"Well you're just going to have to find him now aren't you?"

"How?"

"Don't ask me! I'm just the act on a whim person here!"

"Which landed you in jail."

"But it was worth it to have Lex Luthor 6 feet under."

Lois looked at Lucy and her smile that she held fake finally dropped. She scooted closer to her. "Luce, Lex is alive."

Lucy took a step away from the wall. "What?"

"Clark saw him at Chloe's funeral. He's still alive Luce."

She hit the wall and heard her knuckles pop. Lucy turned around with a manacle look on her face. "That's why Clark's different."

"I know that. Lex is still affecting him."

"No. No. Listen. Lex was dead. I made sure of that."

"So?"

"When they tested on Clark they took blood right? They could have made some miracle blood and brought him back. Lex may have Clark's abilities because of it."

Lois looked at the floor. "Then what Jor-el said makes sense!"

"What did he say?"

"that me and Martha won't there to help Clark fight him. What if he hurts us with his powers?"

"What if you find what kills him first?"

"Huh?"

"Think about it Lois. If he has Clark's blood he has a weakness: meteor rock."

"What if he found a way around that?"

"There has to be something..."

"He would still be half human right?"

"Should be, why?"

"Well then his skin would be bullet proof but not his heart."

Lucy smiled, her sister was a genius. "From the inside out."

"From the inside out."

"Clark could know something that we don't know Lo. His super hearing still works."

"You think he's keeping something from me?"

She shook her head. "Knowing him and his ever lasting hero complex that's a no. He would be protecting you."

"As we protect him. I can't get him to talk Luce. He's worse than he used to be."

"Maybe you just need to prove to him that he can trust you."

"You saying that I should give Lana back?"

"I'm saying fish her out of the woods and let him see her off. That way you both win."

"If that doesn't work?"

"It's not trust, it's a matter of love."

"He probably thinks I don't right now."

"Why?"

"Well I called him last night and pulled a Lana."

"You can't force him Lo. He's a delicate flower."

"I tried calling back and apologizing but he wouldn't answer the phone."

"Which leads you to believe..."

"I don't know. He's been sick since I gave him that shot."

"shots have side affects, maybe grumpiness is one of them."

"Lana said it would bring back all the meories. OH GOD! The memories come out at the kryptonite does. He passed out yesterday morning when it stopped."

"He probably remembers something he doesn't want to tell you then."

"He doesn't remember seeing me before he left, maybe he remembers that."

"Could be worse."

"How?"

"Maybe he knows about the fire show that some one put on for you."

"Could he? He did ask me about ym apartment."

"You going to tell him Lo?"

"Luce he's got enough on his mind. My safety doesn't need to be another especially when I can take care of myself just fine."

"Yeah Lo you've done a good juob. 2 years of taking care of yourself and you still have everything you started with. Lois you lost a job, a home, a boy friend and him. There's no telling what you could lose now."

"My life."

"And if it comes to that what do you think Clark will do?"

"He'd probably die too."

"He needs you Lo. And you, need him. Yeah you guys are going to bump head but that's how it's always been between you two."

"Go to him?"

"Go."

"Thanks Luce."

"no problem Lo."

They hugged and Lois walked out. Lucy reached under her bunk and picked up a piece of paper.

'Lucy Lane. A daughter of mine has commited murder on one of the most respected men in the world. You were not raised this way. You don't think rashly- I've always told you that. Expect my presence in a week. General Sam Lane."

She looked at the date: Jan. 3 2008.

The latter was dated: Jan 1, 2008.

"5 days. God help us.'


	16. Memories and Nightmares Fate

Chapter 16: Memories and Nightmares/ Fate

He stretched out as far as he could but it was no use, the edge was just too hard to reach, he was terrified of falling. She looked down at him, the disappointment evident in her eyes.

"You can not let fear consume you Kal-el. You can do this. You can get to me."

He stretched a bit farther and winced at the pain. "I can't I'm too weak."

She swiftly grabbed his hand and pulled him up to her. She hugged him to her tightly. Her raven hair grazing his shoulders, her touch so familiar, her warmth comforting him.

"Kal-el you must keep trying. You can not lose hope." She pushed him back enough to see his face. Her hand stroked across his cheek. Her kiss planted on his forehead.

"Mom?"

She smiles and runs her fingers along his jaw line. "I imagined a much healthier and bigger boy. But you're handsome just like your father. And those eyes..." She ran her thumb right beside his eyes. "You've got his eyes too. But you've got my nose, smile and rosy cheeks."

He smiled at her words. "Mom." He wrapped his arms around her tighter and she laughed sweetly at him. "I never thought I would see you Mom."

"And I never thought I would see you grown up Kal-el." She took a step back and put a hand on his shoulder. "But look at you, all grown up." Her hand fell off his shoulder and they began to walk through the icy meadow.

"Is this Krypton?"

"Yes, before it was destroyed."

His gaze met hers. "It's beautiful."

She smiled. "What about Earth? What's it like down there?"

"Well some places are icy like this. Some have grass and flowers and trees. Very green."

He noticed her flinch at the word green. "And all that green doesn't bother you?"

"I grew up with it. Green is just something that's always there. The Kryptonite was an unpleasant surprise." He stopped and continued to look around.

"With all that green, don't you worry about getting hurt?"

"Yes."

"That's not a way to live. You can't live in fear."

He looked into her eyes. "I do everyday. Not only because of the kryptonite but because people could find out that I am an alien."

"Why do you hide who you are?"

"Because aliens aren't accepted. I would be kidnapped and tortured." A tear fell from his eyes and he tried to look away but she caught his face. She didn't even have to look at him to know.

"That's why you aren't my big boy. Some one found out and did this to you."

"Yes."

"What happened to this someone?"

"He was shot by my girlfriends sister and died. His dad brought him back to life with my blood I guess."

"Does he have our abilities?"

"I don't know."

She faced him. "Find out."

"I can't be put in that position again. He could easily take me again."

"Use your abilities to get around him."

"I don't have my abilities anymore."

"What?" She exclaimed shocked.

"I lost them from prolonged exposure to kryptonite."

Her mouth dropped and tears covered her face. "Oh Kal-el. Why would someone want to do that to you? You're such a good boy."

He turned away from her pity. "Yeah well apparently that doesn't matter to some people."

"Have you ever hurt this person?"

"He used to be my best friend and she was my girlfriend. They both hated me for keeping this from them. I never felt I could be honest with tem. They investigated me. The man's father knew my secret. He had known it for a long time and I trusted him. He turned on me and told them everything. They set up this scheme to capture me. They had me for 2 years. I died 3 times I think. I don't remember hardly any of it. I'm assuming I wasn't awake for those parts. They hurt me more that I hurt them. They were just out to 'get rid of another problem.'"

"Does she love you?"

"Who?"

"Your girlfriend."

"I don't know. We fought the last time we talked."

His mother looked at him concerned. "What happened?"

"She left." He gave her a tired smiled. "She was tired after searching for me for 2 years. I understood. I supported her. But she pushed me to tell her what I remember. She said it'll only hurt worse as time goes on. Something happened to her while I was gone. She lost her job, her boyfriend and her home. I know she's hiding what really happened so I told her to take her own advice. She hung up and I threw the phone."

"She just wants to help, sounds like to me."

"Well I don't want to remember. I don't want to relive the pain. She just can't understand that. I died mom. I had a child!"

She looked curiously into his eyes. "You had a child?"

"Yes. It's dead though, still born."

"A child." She stepped closer to him.

He started getting nervous.

"Is that the truth?"

"Of course."

"What are you covering Kal-el?"

His brow furrowed and he thought. "Nothing."

"The eyes are the window to the soul. You're lying."

He searched his thoughts again. "No. I saw the grave. The baby's in it."

Her eyes narrowed. "Nothing with your blood is in a grave on Earth is there Kal-el?"

He stepped back. "My baby's dead."

"What are you covering?"

He shook his head. "My baby's dead."

"Yours?"

"Mine."

"You can't have children with anyone but your soul mate. You have not had a child have you?"

He looked into her eyes. "I saw the grave. The baby is in it."

"A baby. Not yours?"

He put his hands over his ears. "My baby."

"You've never had a baby Kal-el. It was just another lie she told you."

He shook his head and his eyes widened. "Just another lie?"

Everything started to fade into a dark green cooler. Lara dropped to her knees beside him and she wrapped her arms around him.

"Kal-el you need to wake up!"

"I'm not asleep."

She grabbed his face. "I am dead. Krypton is gone. WAKE UP!"

He let go of his ears. "NOT ASLEEP!"

"Kal-el."

Her face faded out for a second and he could have swore that he saw Lois staring down at him.

"Wake up! Please don't die on me. Come on!" She screamed.

"Lois?"

Lara looked at him and smiled. "Go to her. You're bleeding."

He put his hand to his face and sure enough blood was coming from his nose. He looked up at her. "I don't want to leave."

She smiled at him lovingly. "I'm always here. You can always find me when you need me." She kissed his forehead. "I love you my son."

"I love you mom."

Her face cut out again and he saw Lois crying. "Your mom is not here Clark."

He smiled. "She's right here beside me! Look!" He turned and nothing was there. He looked back and everything fell apart. He felt himself falling towards the ground when his eyes flew open.

He looked around his bedroom and no one was there. He looked to his bed and gripped the sheets, cold again. He felt the blood coming from his nose and ran for the bathroom to get cleaned up.

He looked up into the mirror and smiled.

"Besides, my delicate feminine sensibilities weren't offended the first time I got a glimpse of, uh, Clark Junior."

He smiled again. He remember that day so well. The shock on his mom's face as Lois peeped over his shoulder was priceless. He looked out the window in the shower to the loft.

"Oh, we're friends now?"

The first time he had connected with the one and only Lois Lane.

"First of many." He whispered as he walked back to his room and laid down on his bed. He drifted back to his dreams with a smile.

'God I love her.'

"2 coats, gloves, toboggan, 2 pair of socks. I'm' set!" She pulled the key from her pocket and stuck it into the slot. She never told him that she had found in that day in there. She had no reason to hide it from him or to keep it but she did. Somehow she knew she would use it again.

"Lois Lane, I have been expecting you." The loud voice boomed throughout the fortress with almost a worried shake in it.

Lois looked around curiously. "And how did you know I was coming? Are you stalking me?"

"I know how much you care about my son, I knew you would come here to get answers your questions."

"Will I get some obscurity or will I actually get straight answers?"

"Depends on the question."

She rolled her eyes. "Figures." She pulled out some paper and a pen and sat down on an ice block.

"An interview Mrs. Lane?"

"I was a reporter once."

"And at heart you always will be, am I wrong?"

She smiled. "No, you're right."

"Why did you let your dreams slip away from you Lois Lane? You had almost everything you wanted and you just let it go."

She frowned. "I was searching for your son Jor-el. I couldn't think to do anything else."

A moment of silence. "Guilt is one of the weakest human traits. Self blame is only one step lower."

She became nervous. He was reading her like an open book. "I do blame myself, yes." But no matter what her mind said she couldn't lie to him.

"As does my son."

She scoffed. "How can Clark blame himself for this?"

"Kal-el thinks that because he pushed Lana Lang and Lex Luthor away they came after him. He also thinks that he became a man you can't love. He blames himself for making you cry all those nights."

"Is one of your powers to read him mind?"

"I know my son well enough to know his thoughts. I've known him since he was a baby. I've never truly left him."

"And I know him better than most."

"But you clearly miss everything he had hidden from you. You can't tell that he still lies to you every day."

She shook her head. "About what?"

"You ask him if he's ok. He says yes."

"I know he's not ok Jor-el."

"Do you know what bothers him the most Lois Lane?"

She thought about it for a second. "Being weak."

"You don't know my son at all."

She opened her mouth to say something but stopped. She didn't want to know the answer to that particular question in her mind. "Lex Luthor is alive Jor-el."

"The Lex Luthor you know is no longer alive."

She was getting frustrated with this man. How did Clark stand him? "Clark saw him at Chloe's funeral."

"Father's will do anything for their sons."

She sighed. "Can you elaborate or is that all I get?"

"He is not the man he seems to be."

She relented and wrote it down. "Does he have Kryptonian powers?" The fortress remained silent. "We think he might have Clark's blood."

"Kal-el's blood? That would explain it."

"Then does he have powers?"

"That I do not know. They could very well progress over time. I don't know the effects on the human body."

"If he did have Clark's powers, would he have the same weakness?"

"I do not know. Our blood can be diluted enough to the point where kryptonite doesn't affect the body."

"If that's true then would he have a weakness?"

"He will be vulnerable. The skin is the invulnerable part of the body. It would have to of been grafted all over the body."

"Ok...let's see... Clark's memories. Do you know about the shot I gave him?"

"Yes I am aware."

"Is it working?"

"Slowly but yes."

"Lana said his memories of everything that happened to him will come back."

"They are."

She shivered at the creepiness of his voice. "What are we supposed to do? I mean to help him. I can't force him to talk. It doesn't work that way with him."

"Give him your love."

"I don't know if we're ready to be at the point where we love each other. I mean I love him and he loves me but we haven't even dated yet."

"A simple touch, a simple memory, a simple smile. Comfort. That's all he wants. That all that anyone wants. Even you."

"Not talking about me." She mumbled as she quickly wrote down his words.

"You affect Kal-el in everything you do. If you're unhappy he will be. You need to learn that he can be there for you too. You can't rely on yourself for everything."

"I can handle myself."

"Sam Lane may have taught you o be touch but you're building an emotional prison around yourself. You can't close yourself off from him because you are afraid that he will leave again."

"I didn't come here for a lecture!"

"You came in search of the truth. I'm just giving what you have asked."

Yet again she kept her thoughts to herself. Admitting she was wrong wasn't an option. Not yet. "Is there anything is this crazy ice palace that could help him?"

"Not yet. He won't need my help for many days."

She stood and began to walk off.

"Lois Lane."

She stopped and turned. "Yes?"

"Pushing him away will only make him want to leave. He missed the woman you used to be. Show him you're still in there."

"I will Jor-el."

With a flash of light she was beamed back to the caves. She smiled as she ran her hand around the caves. His history was written on these walls. She wanted to know everything they said. She blushed as she already knew what the diamond shaped one said. He had a soul mate. When she wore that bracelet it was a symbol of his love and devotion. Something similar to wedding vows. And he had given it to her once and he was waiting for the right day to give it to her again. She blinked back a tear. She wouldn't end up alone, she ahd a soul mate too. She grabbed her keys and got in her car.

"It's time to go home."

He sat in the loft looking out the window when he heard her car speeding down the dirt road. The biggest smile in the world crossed his face and he ran down the stairs. She came to a halt and he had made it to the barn door. She got out and stood beside her car, arms crossed and a goofy smile on her face. His stance mirrored hers. She leaned her weight to her right leg and turned her head to the side. He did the same.

"Are we playing the mirror game?"

He laughed. "Only if you want to Lois."

She took a step forward as did he. She jumped forward and he stood still. "You know I can't jump."

She laughed. "You ran down those stairs though."

He looked at his feet and jumped a little but in the same spot. He looked up at her, smiled and shrugged. She took off running and jumped into his arms and amazingly he caught her.

She leaned her head back and looked at him. "You caught me farm boy. Good job."

He curled a loose hair behind her ear. "I'd never let you fall Lois."

"Oh so you're sentimental now Smallville?"

"And you're a pain now Lois?"

She smiled and rubbed his cheek. "There's my farm boy."

He set her down and grabbed her hands. "I've thought a lot about what you said. I'm not the same person I was, you were right. But...I'm willing to become the man I once was so we can be together."

"Us together? Are you crazy?" She joked.

"Must be to fall head over heels for you Lois Lane."

She smiled. "I don't want you to be the boy you used to be." He looked at her confused and she brought her hand back up to his face and caressed his cheek. "I want you to be the man you've always wanted to be. Your father's son. A man to make the world proud. A man to make me proud."

Her eyes shifted to his lips as his did to hers and they both leaned in. At first it was a simple brush and then suddenly it became frantic and deep. He pulled back reluctantly and she looked at him curiously.

"Oxygen Lois. We have to breathe at some point."

She rolled her eyes and she panted. "Breathing is for sissies Smallville."

"Well you must be the queen of them because you're breathing like crazy."

"Shut up and kiss me."

"Ok...sissy."

She smiled against his lips and continued what they had started. Soon enough she was brushing against him in his sensitive area and he pulled back with a gasp.

"Sorry, sorry. Smallville you alright?"

He looked up at her and turned blood red. "Actually...um..."

He shifted around nervously and she smiled. "Oh really?" She grabbed his hand. "Come here." She pulled them into the house and walked him up the stairs. She pulled him into his bedroom and shut the door.

She turned and he slammed her back against it. He kissed her with all the passion that she had never experienced before. Her hands gripped his shoulders tightly as he moved to kiss her neck. His hands easily found their way to her buttons. He yanked her shirt apart effortlessly and stripped it wildly from her body.

She gasped. "Reckless much?"

He smiled and bent up and kissed her mouth again. He ran his tongue over her teeth, tasting and studying every inch of her he could.

Her hands left his shoulders and slid under his shirt to feel...MUSCLES! She pulled back from him and smiled.

"Nice abs Smallville."

He smiled. "They're small but-"

She brought a finger up to his mouth. "Babbling not kissing."

"Yes ma'am."

He kissed her finger and pulled it away from his face. He pulled her to the bed and kissed her again. She pulled the on to the bed sideways. She laughed and then stood.

He started to get up with her and she waved a finger at him. She bent over to him and pulled his shirt over his head to reveal a size he used to be when he was young. She could still remember how big he used to be and only imagined how big he would get now. It amazed her how much he could grow in 3 days.

She kissed him again running her hands over the lining of his pants, shoving a finger just below the waist like, and testing/teasing him.

He gasped into her mouth and grabbed her hand, tearing it away from the area.

"Not yet." He whispered breathlessly in her ear before slowly biting the lobe. She moaned in slight content but still couldn't ignore the heat building up inside her.

His hands worked their way up her sides and squeezed her breasts making her move into him against the touch. He grabbed the middle of her bra and ripped it.

He needed to fell her skin on his. To hear her moan at his every touch. He needed her to need him just as much as he needed her.

She bit his lip at the action and dropped the ripped garment from her body. She took a step back out of his reach making him whine for more. It made her smiled but she had to find out if there was more than emotion going on.

His eyes went to her chest and took in the sight. 'She's perfect." He licked his lips and met her smiling eyes. He stood and walked towards her wrapping his arms around her and pulled her into another mind blowing kiss. With one hand settled on her lower back he pushed her closer into him and moaned in content as she swiveled her hips against his.

'Definitely more than emotion.' She moaned again as his hand gripped her butt, her leg wrapping around his waist.

He was so lost in the moment he didn't feel the pain shoot up his back until it was too late. Her hand gripped him through his pants and hastily ripped them off along with his underwear.

She had never seen him hard before, just naked. This was a sight to be hold. He had certainly grown a good inch, though she didn't know how. She bent her head back up and continued kissing him as her hand wrapped around his and pumped him slowly.

His body arched as her hand slid up and down him, he was pushing into her hand and couldn't return the kiss anymore.

"Ow...Lois..." He moaned. He felt as though his penis were on fire and knew that this had to stop. Something was wrong.

She felt him grabbed her hand and she stepped back, he fell to the bed with his hands wrapped around himself. She walked forward slowly and sat beside him, worry the only thing now in her mind.

"Clark? Talk to me Smallville. What's going on?"

He winced. "The poison...I have to...get it out...on my own. I don't...want to hurt...you." He said in between pants.

"I'm not leaving you like this Clark."

He looked up at her with pleading eyes. "Lois...please..."

She bit her lips and grabbed her clothes and ran out the door, tears streaming down her face. She jumped in her car and whispered. "He doesn't really love me."

He punched the bed with all his might as he heard the words escape her mouth. He couldn't prove to her otherwise. Not like this, not with something in him that could hurt her.

His head pushed back against the pillow he began working him self up and down but found that it was nothing compared to her touch. Her moans were echoing throughout his body and he knew it wouldn't be enough.

He ran across the room and grabbed the phone, dialing the number from the night before.

"Smallville?"

He gasped. He looked down and knew it was working. "Lois..." He moaned into the receiver.

"I thought you said you wanted to do this alone?"

"Have to."

"Then what do you want from me?"

His breathing was becoming more and more ragged as he pumped himself harder. "Talk...please...just talk..." He whispered in between gasps.

He was begging her and she couldn't refuse the fire in her abdomen anymore. She pulled off the side of the road and hoped no one would stop to ask questions. She listened to his moans and suddenly the heat began to rise, she was feeling that pressure all over again. 'Just pretend it's real. Just pretend it's him.' She slid a hand in her pants and pushed a finger against herself.

She moaned and heard him moan back. "More Clark." She slipped a finger inside.

"Oh...God...Lois..." He moaned.

"Faster..." she whispered, moaning as she put 2 fingers into play.

"Lo-"

"Harder..."

She could hear his breathing shaking and she whimpered.

"Lois..."

"Clark..."

"Oh God Lois..."

"CLARK! Clark..."

Both going harder, faster and wanting more. Their moans becoming a rhythm. Their motions mimicked their dreams. The only thing they lacked were each other.

He heard her scream his name and knew she had just lost herself. He pushed himself a little bit faster. He fell over the edge and felt the semen run down his hand, on to the bed. He fell backward on to the bed and caught his breath as did she.

He laughed. "My mom's going to kill me. My sheets are ruined."

"Not enough sense to go to the bathroom Smallville?"

He whispered. "It's more vivid in here."

"Well my car- MY PANTS! My poor pants..." She grabbed some Kleenex and started wiping off what she could.

"It was worth it." He whispered again.

She smiled. "So does everything look ok Smallville?"

He bent up and looked. Little glints of green were mixed in with the off-white. "There's kryptonite in it. I gotta get this out of here." He picked up the sheets and walked into the bathroom. "Where are you Lois?"

"I'm going to the...I'm going to find a place to live." She cleared her throat. She couldn't tell him where she was really going.

"Oh." His smile faded and his happiness wavered. "I love you Lois."

Her words caught in her throat as she heard him say those words. She fought back tears and she knew she couldn't say it back. If she said it he would leave. She would never really have him.

He waited and know she would avoid this subject. No matter how much time they spent apart she would always remain the same. "Lois?' He whispered not wanting to scare her.

She starred at the dash and just listened. She didn't know what to say. She knows she loves him but saying it would make a real possibility of him leaving again. This time for good and with more pain.

"Please say something."

She thought carefully. "I can't say it back."

He sucked back his pride and bit the bullet. "Do you love me?"

She put her head in her hands. "Clark..."

"Do you?"

'Avoid Lane. Tis the plague.' "I'm going to try and get a job, find a decent priced apartment and hope for the best." She looked at the road and waited for an answer. "I'll visit 3-5 times a week. Make sure you get nice and bulked up and ready."

"Lois you can't keep things from me. I hear your heart beat; I know you're avoiding this."

She put a betrayed hand over her heart. "I'm not keeping anything from you."

"Are you trying to make Jor-el's prophecy come true?"

"What? NO! I'll be there when you need me. Always. I just can't stay in a place where I'm not needed anymore."

"You think I don't need you?"

"You don't need me there to distract you from training. You have 2 months to get better. You need every second."

"So just like that you're leaving me?"

"I'm not leaving you."

"Then what are you doing Lois?"

'Finding a way to stop Lex.' "I'm..."

"Leaving."

"Smallville. Look. I care about you, I really do. I just know that if I stay I'll regret it. I need to find my place in the world as you still get a hold or your life."

"Space." He whispered.

"Space is what I'm asking for. Yes."

He got quiet. "Do I scare you?"

"No. No. You could never scare me Smallville."

"I did before."

"I know. I overreacted. I wasn't thinking."

"Do you think you're overreacting now? Maybe I need you more than you think."

"You need to train."

"I want you here to support me."

"Want not need. Clark I can't spot you as you lift a tractor. It is impossible for me to help you with that."

"But I need you, Lois. I always need you."

"And I'll be there as often as I can. I just have to have time for me too."

He sighed. "I'm going to miss you."

She chuckled sadly. "No more fight left in ya Smallville?"

"I won't be able to change your mind because you're right."

"Say that again?"

"You're right." He rolled his eyes.

She laughed. "Ah. Music to my ears."

"Funny." He looked down at himself and shifted. He really needed to get a shower in. "Well I guess I should let you get back to driving then."

'I suppose you're going in for another round?"

He smiled. "Hopefully not."

"Do you feel any nausea?"

"A little but I don't think it'll make me sick this time."

"Get better for me Smallville."

"Stay happy for me Lois."

"Bye."

"See ya." They both just sat there and waited but neither of them hung up. "I don't want to go Lois."

"We have to."

"I feel like we just broke up."

"Well we weren't technically going out. But from this end I think we were."

"Were?"

"Are."

:With a break."

"And some space."

"I won't see-"

"-you every day. You are my boyfriend."

"I don't have to have a title Lois. All I have to have is you."

"Always so sweet?"

"I try when I can. I love you."

She winced. "I care about you too."

"Good night Lois."

"Good night Smallville."

They both hung up. They both were in pain. Lois was running. Clark was hiding. She was running from her one chance at happiness. Clark was hiding from his responsibility. They had never felt true love. They both had always thought that no one could love a person like them.

The sun had long set and decisions were being made.

He turned on the water, ice cold against his skin. He couldn't feel the temperature, he could only feel the numb, empty spot in his heart an the tears burning his eyes. He sat there until he was too tired to move and fell asleep in the flow of water, an unintentional mistake.

She felt a jerk in her heart that something was wrong and no matter how bad she wanted to ignore it she couldn't. She picked up her phone and dialed to get no answer. She hoped he was only asleep and kept driving. The sickness growing in her heart wit every second, the tears making it harder for her to see, the guilt in her stomach making it harder to breathe, the lights of the cars becoming even brighter, the cloudiness of her mind taking over her judgment.

His eyes snapped open and he struggled to swim to the surface. He pulled at the porcelain with everything he had and barely made it up. The whole bathroom was flooded. His lungs forcing him to gasp for air as he spit out the water in them. He turned off the water and let it drain. Looking up only to hear a heart beat getting faster and faster and he recognized it as Lois's. He could hear the screeching of breaks, the metal crushing from impact and Lois's scream, "CLARK!!!!"

He had slipped on his pants quickly, knowing making a scene might not be the best thing to do. He ran blindly to her, not knowing where she was, only following the incredibly fast heart beat.

The car was halted in mid-air after hitting the embankment on the side of the road. No other cars could be seen. He jumped into the air and grabbed a hold of the car, pulling it down. He hipped the seatbelt off of her and pulled her out with him. The front end was crushed and was going to explode.

The second he grabbed her he heard the ignition of the gas and set her down. He wrapped around her and felt the flames lick his back and sear his skin. He winced and held her body tight. His speed had already returned to normal and Lois turned in his arms.

His eyes were closed shut, jaw clenched, his teeth gritted. She pulled his hands off of her and grabbed him.

"Clark?' She touched his back and he screamed. He fell forward and attempted to crawl away from the pain. She ran over to him and stopped in for a second. "Clark?" She looked him over as he kept moving. A mixture of burnt skin, clothes and blood now covered his back. He was smoking. His breathing was panicked and raw. His eyes were wide in horror.

She didn't know what to do. She looked for something, anything to help him when she felt a hand on her arm. She turned quickly into the embrace of a terrified Martha Kent.

"You ok sweetheart?"

"I've got some burns but I'll live. SMALLVILLE!"

He was racing towards a car and it swerved from him just in time. His body swayed and fell over. Martha ran to his side and lifted his head into her lap. He was very much awake.

"Clark it's ok. It's ok."

Clark met her eyes. "Is Lois ok?"

"I'm right here Smallville." She bent over beside him and took his hand. He shifted uncomfortably and winced.

They heard a small cracking and looked at him. Lois stepped over him and looked at his back. His skin had healed and was no longer burnt. She touched it in amazement and laughed.

"Super strength, speed and invulnerability? Check!"

He stood up and gave her a hug. She returned it gratefully. He felt her body jerk and pulled back from her warily.

"Lois you ok?"

Martha stood. "Oh God."

Clark looked down at Lois's back and saw a liquid filled arrow protruding from it. He pulled it out quickly and threw it aside. He pulled her against his chest and picked her up. He set her inside Martha's car.

"You go home and help her Mom. I'm going to stay here."

"Clark you-"

"Mom. Please. I need to find Oliver."

Martha nodded and drove away.

He looked around and heard something whizzing towards him. He turned and caught it just in time to see the shocked look on Oliver Queen's face. He threw it on the ground and raised his hands in challenge.

"I would have thought playing Robin Hood would have gotten old by now."

"And being an alien isn't demeaning enough."

He smiled. "Actually. No. It's not demeaning in the slightest." He took a step forward. "It's amazing how much friend's can change in 2 years."

Oliver rolled his eyes. "It's also amazing how much they can steal."

"Still blaming me for Lois leaving you?"

AUTHOR'S NOTE- I WROTE THIS BEFORE JUSTICE WAS ON T.V.

"Thanks to you and that kiss I never truly had her."

"I apologized. There's nothing more I can do."

He smiled. "Ah. You've got the right idea."

"What did you do to her?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" He stepped forward. "Still the worthless coward you used to be Clark? My, some things never change. I would have thought that after two years, you would have become more of a man. How can Lois love some one like you?"

He stepped forward. Clark frowned at him. "I was beaten and broken. I was barely alive."

"Ah. But what are you now? Healthy and whole? But yet you continue to place the blame. Be happy for your health, Lois won't have her too much longer."

Clark looked away for a second and Oliver smirked. He looked back and slugged him. He flew across the field and Clark caught him. He lifted him into the air with his hand on his throat.

"What did you do to her?"

Oliver grabbed his hand. "You'll never get it-"

Clark slammed his down on his knee, smashing his balls. "Let me ask again. What did you do to her?"

"Poison." He said in a high pitched voice. He was resisting the urge to cry at this point.

"And how do I help her?"

"I don't-"

Clark's hand tightened around his throat. " You say I don't know and I'll cut your balls OFF! TELL ME!"

"Lex! Lionel!"

Clark dropped him on the ground. His eyes went wide. "No. There has to be another way."

"They're the only one's with a cure. You won't make it to it. It's surrounded by meteor rocks." He smiled and laughed.

Clark punched him square in the face, pushing him 2 feet into the ground. He was knocked out at this point. Clark grabbed his arm and super sped home. He threw him in the kitchen, tying him to the island before going upstairs to where they were.

He opened his bedroom door and saw Lois unconscious. He looked over at his mom who was in the chair by the bed. He walked and sat in a chair opposite of her.

"What happened?"

Clark starred at her for a moment then looked to Lois. He got down on his knees beside the bed and brought a shaky hand to her face. He traced every contour, every angle and piece of skin. He bent forward and pressed a kiss on her lips. He kept his eyes closed and continued to press hoping for her to kiss him back before she slipped too far away. But he leaned back and set his head on her chest and listened as she breathed. Tears slipped from his eyes yet again. He felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned and looked into the worried eyes of his mother.

"Clark?"

He turned back and traced Lois's face. "Poison."

"What?"

He let out a breath and stood. He walked out into the hall not feeling the hand inside of his. He turned and looked at her one last time before turning around. She shut the door and waited for him to speak.

His head dropped into his hands and he fell to the floor. His mother went to him and wrapped her arms around him.

"Oh Clark. What is it? What's going on?"

"She's been poisoned. The only antidote is..." He stopped and let the shock set in. His tears dried and he pulled away. He leaned against the wall and couldn't look at her. "In Lionel and Lex's possession."

Her jaw dropped and she realized what he was so freaked out by. "Clark." She grabbed his hands. "You can't go back there. You'll die!"

"I don't care Mom. I have to save her! It's the only way."

"No. You can't do this. I can't lose my son again."

"And I can't lose Lois!" He stood and shook away her grip. "I can't lose her Mom. I can't. Not again."

"Clark. Think. She can't lose you either. She almost died last time you left. How do you think she'll be if you die?"

"She'll have closure and she'll be alive."

He sped from the house.

His nightmares were just beginning. He had no idea of what pain really was. He had to save her; she was the only thing that mattered.


	17. Life or Death

Chapter 17: Life or Death

Numb because of the fear. Numb because of the pain. The tears now dried to his face left a constant reminder in his sole of what was at risk.

Could he really return to the torture to save Lois? "Yes." He thought a loud. But then his thoughts went back to what his mom said to him. She wouldn't live without his either. Not again. And no matter how much he tried to convince himself that she could find someone else he knew it would never be the same.

The entire time he had been back they hadn't done anything worth while that couples should do. They kissed once and almost had sex but that didn't seem like enough. They hadn't quiet found their way back to each other and here he was running again.

"I'm not running. I can't sit there and watch her die knowing there is something that I could do."

His heart felt ice old, he couldn't regain a sense of warmth. He didn't have her words to guide him. He was all alone to save her.

All alone.

She was his sense of safety. He only felt whole with her smile, her kiss and her touch. No woman he had ever been with could compare.

Walking at a normal speed allowed his vision to blur as if running at the speed of light. This graveyard haunted him everyday of his existence. Kyla, Alicia, Jonathon and Chloe. People he had loved and lost. Fought so hard to keep but died to help him.

Kyla gave him the bracelet, letting him know that he was never truly alone.

Alicia gave him in sight, a constant reminder that no one should die because he was afraid to show his abilities.

Jonathon was his father, the man that taught him everything and that had always loved him. The man that kept him from the edge and gave him sage advice.

Chloe was his best friend, his vent when things got too tough. One person he had always counted on.

They were all gone and he was about to add Lois' name to the list.

He pulled the key from his pocket and sped to the caves. He stuck it in the slot and was transferred to the Fortress.

"Why have you come Kal-el?"

He let out a sigh. This was now a reality. "Lois is dying. She's been poisoned."

"And you want me to help her."

"I was hoping there was a way you could help or that I could on my own."

"Do you know of an antidote?"

"Oliver said that was one in Lionel Luthor's possession."

"Find a way to get to it."

The Fortress went dead and no matter how much he screamed Jor-el wouldn't come back and answer him. He punched at the ice and surprised himself with his ten folded strength, and it angered him even more.

"Kal-el stop this!"

"Help me! I can't do this by myself!" He broke another piece or ice. "Help me!"

The consol began to glow and a knife he had held before appeared. "If he possess your blood this will hurt him beyond repair. If you don't do this you can only fail yourself. And Lois."

"I cannot kill!"

"Despite the fact that he was hell bent on killing you?"

"Despite that."

"Kal-el you cannot let emotions rule your life!"

"Emotions make me human!"

"YOU WILL NEVER BE HUMAN! You let emotions rule over your common sense!"

Clark became quiet and studied the blade. "I can't kill."

"But you can wound."

"Wound him?"

"Yes."

The Fortress died again and he left without another word. He stuck the blade in his pocket and ran to the Luthor Mansion.

He stood outside of the property line and x-rayed the interior. One room in particular was coated in lead bringing an un-relaxing feeling to his heart. He read every label of every jar in that house and his heart sank as he realized that it had to be in that room.

He paced around and waited, hoping for a miracle. 5 minutes passed and it never came. Lois' time was ticking away. He let out a nervous breath and took a step forward only to feel a hand land on his shoulder.

He grabbed it and twisted it off of him. He grabbed the neck of the person the hand belonged to, shoving him to the ground.

"CK!!! Whoa! It's just me!"

Clark looked down. "Jimmy? What the hell are you doing here?" He helped him to his feet.

"I could ask you the same thing after you were trapped here for 2 years. Tortured. Killed and brought back to life. Proved and tested on. What are you doing here CK? Are you crazy?"

Clark took a step back from shock. Jimmy knew. And surprisingly enough Jimmy had confidence. That was different. "My files. You found my files?"

Jimmy sighed as if relieved. "Yeah. With the right number anyone in the world could hack into those files."

"What did you do with them? The files what did you do with them?"

He reached into his folder and pulled out a stack of papers. "They are all right there. Every single days report up until the last few months."

Clark started riffling through the papers worriedly. "Where are they?"

"They were written about every 3 weeks. They all say the same thing. 'Subject is dying. No more research can be conducted. The name Lois Lane is the only thing permanently embedded in what's left of the mind.'"

Clark stopped and looked up at Jimmy.

"And on every files beginning it stated everything about a man named Kal-el. The more I looked the more the similarities between you and him came and appeared."

"So you know everything?"

"Well I was hoping to confirm everything that I know with you."

Clark shook his head. "Well everything you read in those reports are about me, yes."

"Alright them my first question then. Why are you here?"

"Lois has been poisoned. And the only antidote is in there." He pointed at the lead-lined room. "In that same room I was in months ago."

"So you plan to run in there and play hero when you could get trapped again?"

Clark pulled the blade from his pocket. "I'm hoping that won't happen. This...this is what my father gave me to help me."

"CK, Mr. Kent is dead."

"I've known that for a while now Jimmy. I mean my birth father."

"Ok..."

"I have to get in there Jimmy."

"Alright CK." Jimmy sucked up his chest to be more masculine. "I'll help you."

Clark took a double take at Jimmy. "Jimmy it's too dangerous."

"And I can't just let you go in there alone CK."

"Are you sure?"

"Not really but I have to."

"Alright. Let's go."

They ran up to the side of the house and Clark scanned each room. He punched in one brick of the wall and crumbled the corner of the house. He sped him and Jimmy to the other side as the alarm went off. He fried every camera and climbed in through a window on the bottom floor, pulling Jimmy in with him. They ran down the hallway and Clark busted the door open.

"This was too easy CK."

Clark smiled at him and walked towards the center of the room where the bile sat. As soon as they touched it the door slammed shut encasing them both inside.

Clark turned wildly and screamed at Jimmy. "JIMMY! Break that green cable!"

Jimmy turned his attention to the cable Clark was pointing at and ran to it. He broke the connection from the outlet and bent the metal to cut the airflow.

"Clark and Jimmy." They turned and Lana staggered towards them. Her clothing was ripped and the remnants of blood remained on her skin. "This was way too easy. You poison the girl and the guy comes running."

"Lana what have you done to Lois?"

"Every second that ticks by brings her heart rate down just a little bit. Soon Lois Lane will be gone and you will be mine because you'll haven o where else to go. Your mom will be with Lionel. I'll kill Jimmy and Oliver and it'll be just us. All alone again. Together at last."

"I thought you said that you regretted everything and that you were trying to make up for it!"

"Oh I regret what I did to you but not to Lois. Never."

He stepped forward. "But don't you see that killing her and them will affect me? Lois is my heart Lana, she's my soul mate. Oliver was a good friend of mine and so is Jimmy. You kill them and I'll basically be dead too. Think about it. You don't want to do this." He x-rayed her and found nothing but clothes on her body so he stepped forward again.

She shook her head violently. "No Clark. I have to be with you."

"Lana there's someone for everyone. I'm not the one you are supposed to be with. Neither is Lex. But there is someone. I swear it."

"I only love you."

"No you don't. You don't love me Lana."

"But I do. More than words can say!" She smiled and ran into his arms. "I want to be with you forever. We will be so good together. You'll never remember Lois."

He reached his hand around hit the back of her head knocking her out. He laid her out on the ground and grabbed Jimmy, racing back to the house.

He ran up the stairs to Lois's side. She was pale and barely breathing. He looked at the vile in his hand and smiled.

"This will save you Lois. It's going to be ok."

His mother handed him a needle and he stuck it inside the elixir. 20cc should be enough, he thought. He moved himself towards her arm when he stopped. Jor-el's voice stopped him.

"That will kill her Kal-el."

"What should I do?"

"Bring her and the vile to me. I can save her if you hurry."

He put the plastic cap back on the needle and stuck it in his pocket before lifting her out of the bed. He kissed her forehead and she moaned in recognition. He sped into the caves, from there her went to the Fortress and laid her on the pedestal.

"Stand back." A bright light erupted from the consol and pierced her and the vile. He stood and watched as her body was swept over. Cautiously stepping forward as the light died away, he smiled down at her no longer pale face. He brushed a loose strand from her forehead and felt her smile under his fingers.

"Oliver?"

He stepped back away from her, the name slashing his heart. She sat up and looked around, when her eyes met him.

"Smallville you ok?" She got up and walked towards his. She wrapped her arms around him. He succumbs to her warmth but just as he touched her she pulled away. "I haven't seen you in 2 weeks! What the hell is you problem? There are search partied out looking for you!" She punched him in the shoulder and he winced in pain. "What'd you do? Go running back to Lana and do her there? Run away because you like sucks? Well get over yourself! Woos!"

He stumbled back away from her, the words from her mouth killing him.

She opened her mouth again but instead looked him over with a curious look. "What the hell? There's no way you could lose every ounce of muscle you had in two weeks! Unless..." She put a hand on his face. "Smallville are you dieing?"

"What? Lois you know what happened to me! You saved me."

"Saved you? Clark you saved yourself is you're here! Were you on drugs or something? Last time I saw you were on my doorstep. You were crying about something."

His mouth dropped as the realization hit him across the face. He looked up to the ceiling. "What the hell did you do to her?"

She looked around for another person and laughed. "Talking to yourself is never a good sign. Come on we'll find a way out of this...artic...How did we get here?"

He paid no attention to her. "Jor-el answer me!"

"Actions have consequences. You knew this."

"You took the last 2 years from her life! She has no idea how different everything is now! How dare you take that from her!"

"Would you rather her dead?"

"Whoa there! Where ever you are Mr. Jor-el. You cannot conspire against me. Not happening!"

"Lois shut up."

"Smallville-"

He turned blood red and yelled. "SHUT UP!"

"You don't yell at me! Got it buddy? Watch that temper of yours. It'll get your ass kicked."

He ran a hand through his hair. "Let us out! NOW!"

"Ka-"

"NOW!!!"

The light beamed around them and they were returned to the caves. Clark walked out with Lois yelling in his wake.

"What just happened back there? And since when did you lose you temper? What has happened?"

He didn't turn, he did nothing to acknowledge her, making her anger rise. But what she couldn't see was the tears streaming down his cheeks. The ghostly memories hiding in his eyes.

She ran in front of his and grabbed him. She caught sight of the tears as he tried to turn away. She let him go. "Will you please tell me what's going on?" She tried to be calm but her patience was running thin.

"It was 2 years ago."

"What was?"

"The last time you saw me."

"Have I been in a coma or something?"

"No. You were awake every second of it. More awake than I was."

"Then why don't I remember?"

"He took your memory when he saved you."

"Saved me from what?"

"Oliver shot you with some poison. I didn't know what else to do."

"Oliver? Oh great. You're making up stories now? I knew you were jealous of him but him shooting me? That ridiculous."

"It's the truth!"

"Yeah and pigs can fly!"

"Lois you have to believe me!"

"Why? All you ever do is chase my boyfriends away. Do you not want me to be happy?"

"Lois. Of course I want you to be happy."

"Then stop lying about him!"

"I'M NOT!" She started to walk away. "Where could you possibly go Lois? You have no idea what you could walk into."

"I'm going to my apartment! Where I can return to normal life and ignore you!"

"You don't live there anymore."

"What?" She turned and faced him.

"You never told me the reason."

"Alright. Fine! Where do I live?"

"At the farm with me and mom."

"What about Chloe? How do I get a hold of her?"

He bit his lip and dropped his head. "You don't." Another tear fell from his eyes.

"Do we hate each other or something? Seriously Smallville, that could never happen."

"She's dead." He whispered.

"Excuse me?"

"She's dead."

Her jaw dropped. "What? How could that happen?"

"She died saving me."

Lois pushed him. "How could you let her do such a thing?"

"I didn't have a choice in the matter! I never wanted her to do that! Chloe was my best friend, why would I want her to die?"

"Because you are a sick twisted mother fuer!" She swung out of anger and punched him in the face. To her surprise blood flowed easily from him.

He fell to the ground with the same pain in his stomach as before. His hands wrapped around his throat as he choked up the Kryptonite and spilled it onto the ground.

She watched his curiously almost guiltily until she saw the meteor rock. It angered her. "Meteor rock? So you are on drugs!"

He fell over on his side screaming in pain.

"How dare you Clark? You can't just run off, leave your family and get hooked on drugs!" She pushed his sides in making more of the fluids pour out. "You need to get that out of your system."

He flailed out his arms and legs kicking her away from him. He lifted himself up and emptied more out of him. His arms shook so hard they barely held him up. The second he felt his nose bleed he didn't have the strength the fight anymore and fell over. The memories he had suppressed for so long finally came flooding in.

"Cut him."

"NO! Please! I'll do anything! Please just let me go! AH!!!! NO!!!"

The knife entered his skin and he screamed horrifically. He couldn't twist away from the pain, the chains on his body made of kryptonite holding him in place. The knife sunk deeper making a sickening sound of screams and ripping flesh echo throughout the room. He looked panicked to his side at Lex and Lana standing hand in hand.

"He bleeds just like you or I." Lex stated as he looked at the gashes.

"But the blood is different. It's more like a quadruple helix." Lana whispered from his side.

"Where are you from? And how did you end up on Earth? Come to take it over?"

"He looks to weak to do it now doesn't he?"

"Please. Please let me go. I'll never tell anyone this happened. I swear...just please...please. My family-"

Lana ran her hand along his face. "You have no family. They don't care about you. They never have and never will."

He shook his head furiously as another knife entered his side. His naked form being tested in numerous ways. Lana ran a hand up his thigh.

"No! Don't!" Clark screamed knowing what she was reaching for. He tried even harder to push away. The chains were cracking despite the material was made from his weakness.

She watched his face as she wrapped a hand around him, a wicked smile splayed on her own.

His eyes turned blood red and he burnt her hand away from him. He burnt the kryptonite chains and every person that came near him in the room. He flung the doctors into the walls and made break for the door.

A panic set in as the walls lit into the bright green he feared. He activated his heat vision once more and seared everything he could when he heard the guns cck behind him.

He turned and tried to dodge the bullets but they quickly caught up with him, loading his body until he fell into the mass of blood they had created.

He shook violently on the ground below her; he had for a minute or so now. He suddenly began to scream at an unknown being.

"Ok Smallville cut the crap. I'm sick of this." She grabbed his shoulders and lifted him up. His opens shot open and she saw the fear that was hiding within him.

He wrenched out of her grasp quickly and started running down the road. He screamed almost manically. "NO! Let me go home!"

She ran after him unsure of what he was running from. What scared her the most is that she had only seen that fear in him a few times. One that she remembered the most. When they saved him behind the Talon. Something was seriously wrong. "Clark!"

"They're behind us! Run! They'll kill us!"

She turned her head and saw nothing but the dust they had kicked up behind them. He tripped over a log at the edge of the woods and as he scrambled to get up she caught him.

"NO!" He screamed.

She pinned him against the ground. He was fighting her with everything he had. "Clark what's going on?"

"You're not Lois!"

"Of course I am. Tell me what's wrong. I can help you Clark."

He opened his eyes that were previously shutting out the images. "You don't remember."

"Remember what? What am I supposed to remember?"

"What happened to me!"

"What am I supposed to remember Clark?" He shook his head and tried to break free again. "Clark you have to answer me!"

"Torture." He whispered in a creepy voice.

She looked down at him closely. He was desperately trying to get away from her. "What are you talking about? What torture?"

And the dam broke. All the information flowed from him. "Lex and Lana kidnapped me. They tortured me for 2 years. I died 3 times. They did things to me that I never want to go through again."

"Why would Lex and Lana want to do that to you?"

He looked straight into her eyes and stopped fighting. "Because I'm an alien."

She looked at him without expression. "An alien."

He froze and started babbling trying to explain himself. "Please don't get scared Lois. Please don't hate me again."

"Why would I hate you?"

"You did the last time I told you."

"Prince of plaid, my best friend is an alien. I think this is awesome." She let him go.

"Best friend?" He said with remorse. The memories of the night they almost had together flashed in front of his eyes. He was going to have to start all over with her.

"What else would you be? Oh don't tell me, you're my boyfriend now." She let out a laugh and he looked away in pain.

"Well not really. We hadn't really admitted it yet."

Her laughter stopped. "What? We're together?"

He stepped towards her cautiously. "Yeah."

She looked at him, wondering how they got that was.

They walked to the house in silence. Lois turned every few seconds to make sure he was ok. But she could tell that he wasn't. Blood and meteor rock covered his shirt and he was contemplating something in his mind.

She would look ahead and try to see the difference of this world but everything looked the same. All the trees and grass, even that rusty old car abandoned years ago was still in the same spot. What had changed? It didn't feel any different.

They made it to the edge of the property and she noticed the change. There was no farm. It was all dead land. The house hadn't been painted in forever. It was now a pale yellow color.

She walked up the porch and opened the door. Martha sat on one of the stools, her head buried in her hands. She had more gray streaks than Lois remembered.

Martha turned and looked at her. A mass of wrinkles covered her face but that smile was still the same, it made her feel safe.

"LOIS!" She ran and gave her a hug. "I'm so glad that you're ok-" She let Lois go and walked toward Clark who had just walked in the door. "Clark are you ok? Did it happen again? Did you pass out?"

"I'm fine." He walked back out the door and into the loft.

Lois watched as Martha went to the window and watched him. The silence was killing her. "Mrs. Kent?"

Martha turned around. "Yes?"

"I think there is something seriously wrong with him."

"What is it sweetie?" Martha asked worried there was something new now.

"I don't think he's exactly sane. He thinks he's an alien."

She laughed slightly in relief. "He is Lois. You know that."

Lois threw up her hands in defeat. "Ok. This day keeps getting weirder. Has everyone gone crazy? I mean come on! I wake up, freezing no less, with him hovering over me. Tells me Oliver shot me, I've just lost 2 years of my memory, we're together and I don't live at the Talon. And Chloe's dead. That's ridiculous right? And then he says he's an alien. Been tortured for the 2 years that I lost by Lex and Lana." She took in a deep breath.

Martha stepped forward and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Lois. I wish it wasn't true. But it is. Everything he told you is true."

Lois shook her head. She fought the tears in her eyes. "That's impossible. I refuse to believe that. Oliver loves me."

"You left him because you realized you are in love with Clark."

"Why would I be in love with him? We can't stand each other."

"Are you sure about that?"

Lois watched him pace around in the loft. On instinct she walked out the door and p to the loft. She let out a shaky breath before she took the first step. Her feet felt heavy and some how this felt all too familiar.

She looked at her watch 7:03 PM. That time looked familiar and it made her heart clench in her chest. Was she really missing 2 years of her life?

As she reached the top she turned her head, unable to look at him. "You know, you're going to walk a hole through the loft if you keep pacing like that." 'Please let us still banter. This can't be awkward.'

He stopped and looked at her. "The last thing you remember about me, I barely remember. I do know that was the night I was kidnapped and that I wrote the last entry in my journal."

She smiled. "You actually use that thing?"

"Yeah. It used to help when you weren't around."

She stepped towards him. "We're really together?"

"Yes."

"How did that happen? From what I remember we're barely friends."

He laughed. "Barely friends? I would have said worst enemies."

She looked down. "Well I hope you don't expect me to just dive in. Because this me is still in love with Oliver. Not you."

He turned to the loft window. This was the old Lois he had to remind himself. Didn't hide too much, always speaking her mind even if on accident. "I don't expect you to love me Lois."

She realized she hurt him but she couldn't shut her big mouth. "Well good. Glad we got that clear." She was his grip tighten on the window.

"But that doesn't stop me from loving you. You got that clear?"

He turned back towards her as a tear slipped down his face. She wiped ti away and he leaned into her touch. "Since when did farm boy cry?"

"A lot has changed Lois. I'm not the same boy you once knew."

"I can see that. But I can also see that you aren't happy with the person you are. You haven't become the man that would make your dad proud."

He smiled and gently lifted her hand from his face. He bent forward and kissed her lightly on the lips. He pulled back quickly though realizing that this was wrong. She loved another man. Then he looked into her eyes and nearly died as he was her smile.

"You've done that before."

"Maybe someday I'll get to do it again."

She looked into his eyes and started to lean in but stopped herself just as their noses touched. She pulled away and started down the steps, but something stopped her. She turned her head and met his gaze looking down at her lovingly.

"Thank you for saving me Clark."

"Thank you for saving me Lois."

"I wish I could remember what happened."

"Trust me, you don't want to remember all that pain."

"No, but I would like to remember what it felt like to be with you."

Realizing what she said she ran for the house leaving a huge smile on his face.


	18. Love and Luthors

Chapter 18: Love and Luthors

He watched the video recording twice. His lip twitching, his hand crushing the remote as the face appeared on the screen. The face smiled then raised a hand, middle finger up and proud. The screen busted and went fuzzy. He threw the remote and it crushed upon impact of the wall.

"DAMN IT!" He screamed.

Lionel walked through the door and saw the image frozen to the screen. "Lex, none of us could have known that he would have gotten better."

"We could have caught him. But the fact of the matter is that we have a snitch. Lana hasn't been home in 5 days. Curious? The liquid lead is missing. She gave him the antidote."

"Where do you think she is now?"

He smirked. "Probably hiding trying to think up an excuse. I don't think one will be good enough this time. Do you?"

"Never again."

"Then it's settled. Lana Lang dies."

"Simple enough. No emotional attachments?"

He scoffed. "Emotions? You do have a good sense of humor don't you Dad?"

Lionel smiled. "But of course." He walked out the door.

Lex bit his lip as he felt a tear slip from his eye. He walked to the glass and placed his hand upon it. The glass reflected a more destroyed him back. A vivid picture of the pain flashed in his mind constantly but the reflection was worst of all. This pain was frozen in the reflection. Frozen.

She lay comfortably on his, her, bed and started to nod off to sleep when the door suddenly opened. She turned and saw Clark walk in and start taking his boots off. His hands went to his shirt and he pulled it over his head. She watched wide-eyed, afraid to scare him. She almost snickered as she thought about scaring him. He could literally jump out of his bones. When he started to pull his pants off she know she would have to act fast.

"Not that I don't enjoy a good strip show but what do you think you are doing?"

His hands stopped at the his zipper and he looked to her face. He quickly picked up his things and left the room mumbling a quick, "sorry." As he slammed the door.

She would have normally rolled over and dismissed it with a laugh but her gut made her get up and walk down the stairs to find him sitting on the couch in the living room. His head was in his hands, his elbows resting on his legs as they jerked up and down furiously as if he was condemning himself. She fingered the rail nervously before stepping towards him.

"I take that disappearing act as realization right? When I spoke you ran. So that should be about right. I mean you would make a good stripper with some more muscles"

His legs stopped jerking but he didn't look up. "Sorry about that Lois."

"Hey don't worry about it. I just wish I could have shut my mouth long enough to see some goods." She playfully slapped him on the shoulder trying to raise his sprits. And with a sigh it didn't work.

"I keep forgetting you're not the Lois I know."

She rolled her eyes annoyed. "Still the Lois you know Smallville. You've known me forever."

"The Lois that I know LOVES me. She's not just my best friend like you."

She bit her lip and grabbed his arm as he started to walk away. "Just because I'm not in love with you doesn't me I don't care about you Smallville."

He turned and looked down at her with a smirk. "I knew it! You do like me!"

Her mouth dropped but she quickly recovered. "In you dreams Smallville."

He stepped towards her. "Nice comeback. Did you think that up all by yourself Lois?"

"Funny Kent. Hilarious actually."

"I try."

"So why were you trying to sleep with me? Was it going to be just sleep or...?" She raised an eyebrow as she gestured with her hands.

"Just sleep Lois. We're, were, not quite at that stage yet." He walked away nervously. This Lois didn't know why.

"And it would have been you who wanted to wait right?" She walked around in front of him and grabbed his face, forcing him to look at her. "Simple yes or no Smallville."

"Actually it's complicated."

She looked around then back to him. "Well being as I'm the only one here tell me." He tried to look away again. "Don't tell me Jr. doesn't work!"

He winced at the words coated with sarcasm. "Something like that, yeah."

She let him go and burst into a fit of laughter. He closed his eyes and tried to fight back the pain her laughter brought. He tried to remember that she didn't know but it didn't help. The tears were building.

"I'm glad you find it so funny Lois." His voice shook and she looked up at him. Her smile dropped as she saw the anger and the hurt with in those blue/green eyes. "I don't find ti funny in the least."

"What happened?"

"Lana gave me an injection in my brain that damaged that particular use of my body because I wouldn't agree to have her baby. She was pregnant with 'my' baby and had a miscarriage. The grave was in my chamber. I starred at it for days on end wishing you could be there with me but at the same time wishing you would never see it. Wishing I could have a child but with you instead. I never got that wish Lois. I thought I could never 'work' again. Nothing I did could fix it until 5 days ago when Lana gave you a shot to give me. Ever since then I've been throwing up blood and kr- meteor rock both. I've passed out and got a lot of the memories back from when I was trapped in the mansion. I don't want to remember. I need someone to help me through this and the one person I could have turned to has apparently left the building!"

She shook her head. "Clark I didn't know. God I'm sorry."

"I know Lois."

She wrapped her arms around him and held him there slowly making circles on his back until he relaxed. After that eternity she looked up at him. "Come on." She grabbed his hand and pulled him to the stairs.

"Lois I thought-"

She put a finger on his lips. "You think too much. It's bedtime Smallville."

"You sure?"

"Of course." They went upstairs and got in the bed. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into him. She laughed.

"No poking me Smallville."

He simply smiled at the déjà vu. "No grinding me Lois."

"Night."

"Mhm."

"Hey! You're not asleep!"

"We've said the same things before Lois."

"Really?"

"No I'm lying."

"Shut up and go to sleep."

"Gladly."

She kissed his hand as she heard a faint snore behind her then drifted off to sleep.

"Pst! CK, you in here?"

'Damn alarm clock.' He reached behind him and hit the snooze button then attempted to go back to sleep.

"CK? Hey? Pst!"

Clark groaned into her neck and pulled her tighter to him.

"Smallville..." She choked out. "Can't breathe..."

He groaned again and let her go a little.

"A little more Smallville."

He released his grip and rolled over, pulling the covers over his head to block out that damn alarm clock. It just kept getting louder. He reached up and smashed it, scarring Lois and Jimmy in the process.

"CK! PST!"

He sat up and fumbled through the broken plastic. "Why won't it stop?"

Lois pecked him on the shoulder. "Jimmy isn't the alarm clock Smallville."

He turned his head towards the door and saw Jimmy smiling sheepishly by the door. Clark laughed a bit. "Makes sense then." He lay back down. "What's up Jimmy?"

"I need to um...talk to you about something."

"Alright. I'll be down in a few."

Jimmy walked down the steps.

Clark sat up again and looked over at Lois. She was turned to the side facing the door. He stretched and laid back on her. His face was right in front of hers. She smiled at him. "Hey there." He whispered.

"Did you always do that or is this a first?"

He thought for a second. "This is a first I think."

She shook her head at him. "Just because you have to get up doesn't that I have to."

"You're lazy."

"Lazy-tired. There is a difference."

He stood and went to his dresser. He pulled out some of her clothes and threw them on her.

"Hey!"

"Get up!"

"NO!"

He jerked the covers off of her and she curled into a ball and tried to pull the covers back down on her.

"Nope. You, get up!"

She looked up at him. "Make me."

He cocked his eyebrows at her. "You really wanna go there Lois?"

"Oh, I'm already there Smallville."

She made a grab for the covers again and he flung them out of the way. He scooped her up in his arms and raised her above his head.

"Put me down!"

"But you have to get up!"

He laughed as she kicked and squirmed trying to get away. He sighed and sat her down on the ground. She swung to punch his shoulder but he caught her hand in midair. She stared at it as she felt electricity shoot through it. She met his eyes as he dropped her hand.

"Fine I'm up!" She grabbed her clothes and threw them on. "Happy?"

"Very. Come on, Jimmy waiting." He made a grab for her hand again but she quickly pulled away. He turned around and starred at her. "What's wrong?"

"No hand holding. That's way over the line Smallville."

"But us cuddling isn't?"

"I was tired and delirious. Won't happen again."

He furrowed his brow. "What's going on Lois?"

'I'm falling in love with you and that is so wrong!' "Absolutely nothing."

He shook his head. "And the fact that you just lied tells me there is something wrong."

She crossed her arms. "Nothing is wrong. Just- let's go." She made a move for the door but he didn't budge. "Move."

"The one thing I hate the most is when you hide behind those walls especially when you don't need to. Come on Lois, it's just me. What can it hurt talking to me?"

She kept trying to push past him. He grabbed her arms and whispered in her ear. "Are you afraid?"

She chuckled. "A Lane afraid? Yeah right!"

"Lois." He looked in her eyes and caught the glitter of fear he knew would be there. She quickly broke the gaze and he dropped her arms. He opened the door and walked out.

He walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge trying to occupy his mind.

"Is Lois ok?"

Clark turned and saw Jimmy sitting at the island.

"She doesn't...she's not the same."

"What happened after you gave her that shot CK?"

"I lost 2 years of my life." They turned and saw her making her way down the stairs. "So, Jimmy, what did you want to talk about?"

Jimmy turned red at the sight of her and looked at Clark. She had a pair of really short shorts on and a tank top. "Um...I was hoping to talk to CK alone."

Clark grabbed a glass, his back turned to them. "My life isn't a secret to her. I have nothing to hide." He turned and looked at her, challenging her.

"Ok, Mr. Trusting! You really think reverse psychology works on me? The General-"

"The General is not you."

"He's apart of me! I don't give in to demands Kent."

He looked at her smugly then turned to Jimmy. "Jimmy, what is it that you wanted to talk about?" He asked politely. Out of the corner of his eye he could see a boiling Lois opening her mouth. He raised his hand to silence her. "I think Jimmy is trying to talk Lois."

She shot him a death glare but he didn't see it. He turned his full attention to Jimmy.

Jimmy stood under their gazes and nervously began to ring his hands. "Um I've been looking into Lana and the Luthor's phone records. Both have placed several phone calls to this house. The dates are scattered but they were all within the time period you were gone."

"Are you saying that my mom knew?"

"No...I'm saying she was still in contact with them and she could have noticed something suspicious. Maybe we should question her about this?"

"She's not home though."

"Then she's probably at the Luthor Mansion." Lois piped in.

Clark turned to her. "No. She wouldn't stay in contact with them knowing what happened."

Jimmy sighed and pulled a tape from his pocket. "That's what I thought. Then I hacked into the Luthor's security system. Watch this." He stuck the tape in the VCR and the following conversation was played back:

"He's never going to believe that! I can't just say that I talked to you!"

"Why not? Talking never hurt anyone." He smiled manically.

"Lionel I can't talk to you anymore, he won't like it." She protested with her arms folded over her chest.

"Martha."

She shook her head. "No. You hurt my son."

"Ah. But I saved your life."

She lifted her head defiantly. "I know that."

"I told you about your son. I kept you informed while you were hurt."

"Then you brought yours back to life with his blood."

"Martha he's my son and if I can find a way to save him I will."

She took a step back away from him. "He tried to kill Clark!"

"That's irrelevant now."

"No!! It's not!"

He grabbed her arm. "You listen to me. Your son is free and is becoming healthy again."

She attempted to jerk away but her efforts were in vain. "But he's still hurt Lionel! And you can't take back telling them his secret."

He let her going. "I already have."

"What?"

"You wouldn't be here if you hadn't forgiven me."

She turned and ran out. A voice from the shadows spoke up.

"What are you going to do with her dad?"

"Play her for everything she has of course."

"Good."

"Still no reactions Lex?"

"Not yet. Hopefully there won't be."

Lionel walked past his son and stroked a large glass container. "Hopefully. You never know with that blood work."

The tape ended there. Clark watched horrified, Lex did have his blood and his mother knew. She was still talking to Lionel. He put his hands on his head and starting pacing around the room.

Both Lois and Jimmy watched helplessly. Lois stood and walked towards him, setting a hand on his shoulder.

He froze in place and didn't move a muscle. "Maybe it's not what you think. Maybe she's not trying to hurt you like you think she is."

His muscles tensed and he slowly turned, removed her hand from his shoulder and put it at her side. He walked around her and out the door without a word.

"Would CK kill someone?"

Lois turned and looked at Jimmy. "Never. But he's not afraid of hurting someone." She looked out the window as he crawled under the tractor and began slowly benching it. She turned away. "Jimmy?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you find out what happened to my apartment two years ago?"

"Um...It was all over the papers. I'm sure I could."

"Thanks."

Jimmy pulled out of the drive as another vehicle pulled up. She felt the tractor drop to ground and saw Clark speed away. She was proud of him for leaving, he was in no condition to spar with Martha.

She walked through the door with a smile. "Hey Lois. How are you feeling?"

"Me? Oh I'm fine."

"Where did Clark go?"

"Away. He's kind of pissed right now."

Martha sat down at the counter and Lois stood up. "What's wrong with him?"

Lois bit her lip and starred at her for a second. "Well Jimmy just showed up with a survalnce tape from Luthor Mansion."

Martha's eyes got wide. "Oh God."

"Yeah. And you want to know what the worst part was? Witnessing him watch his mother betray him!"

Martha put on a fake smile. "What are you talking about?"

"I knew you cared about Lionel but I would have assumed you loved your son more than this. Running to Lionel to talk about Lex ring a bell?"

"Martha shook her head. "It's not what you think!"

"Then explain to me why Clark is ready to commit murder right now!"

"Lois, yes I have been talking to Lionel about Lex. But it's not what you think!"

"So it's not that you hate your son or something? The Martha Kent I knew wouldn't-"

"The Martha Kent you knew was happy!"

"What?"

"I lost my husband. I lost Clark, I thought he was dead! I was falling apart and Lionel saved me!"

"That doesn't give you an excuse to run back to him now!"

"I love him!"

"HE KIDNAPPED YOU SON AND KEPT HIM FROM YOU! He helped kill him! I may not remember it but I know that. How can you possibly see past that?"

Martha put her hands on her face and started to cry. Lois rolled her eyes and walked to her side.

"Look I know what it's like to live alone and feel unloved. But you can't run to Lionel anymore. He can't redeem himself this time."

"I'm engaged to him."

Lois took a step back. "What?"

"I'm engaged to him! I love him!"

"Are you going to break it off?"

"I don't know!"

"What?"

"I have to think for a while."

"What is there to think about? He's a heartless, murdering bastard! And if you love you son like I remember you won't have to think twice about this!"

Martha ran up the stairs and slammed the door.

He shivered as he walked in. The cold stares of the room seeping into his veins, crawling through his soul. A sickening hollowness within each cell mocked his thoughts of happiness. The guard stopped and unlocked the door, letting him enter a cell that didn't reek of isolation.

"So if it isn't the boyfriend?"

Clark turned and smiled at her. "Hey Lucy."

"You've gotten bigger. I'm impressed."

"And you've...adjusted to life in the big house."

She shrugged. "It's not as hard as it looks. So why are you here?"

"It's about Lois."

"Got that much. Man you guys think I'm stupid."

"She was poisoned."

"What? Is she ok? Who did it?"

"Oliver. She's...somewhat ok."

"Define somewhat."

"I mean she doesn't remember the last 2 years of her life."

"So she's her bossy old self again, huh?"

"She's really confused. And I was hoping you could help her."

"Well I would except for the fact that I'm in jail and she doesn't remember why."

"I can come with her."

"Sure."

"Thanks."

Lucy watched him for a minute. "She really that bad?"

"I can't tell her everything like I want to. She's so damn hardheaded."

"That's my sister. I like her better than the weak Lois. Wait when will you come?"

"2 days I guess. Why?"

Lucy dove under her bed and pulled out a letter. "Family reunion much?"

"Maybe it'll help?"

"Wit what? The General's going to pissed and she has no idea why."

"I don't know what to tell her!"

"Why?"

"Because she never told me about her life while I was gone. All I know is that something happened to her apartment and she lost her job."

"You don't know what happened? She said she was going to tell you."

"Well I guess she never got around to it. Can you tell me what happened?"

Lucy studied him for a second. "Lois walked in to her apartment and got her keys. She turned to walk out when a lit bottle of vodka came through the window. She ran to it and tried to pull it out but another one came through the door, one the fireplace and another through the window. She barely escaped." She looked out the bars. "That was the day the Talon burnt to the ground and it was 2 weeks after she broke up with Oliver. And personally I don't think it was coincidence." She looked at him. "Do you?"

He walked in the house with a lot on his mind. It made since that Oliver would be pissed but he couldn't believe he would try to hurt her.

"Hey there Smallville. Got Lana on the mind?"

He stopped dead in his tracks and turned. She sat up on the counter, low cut halter top, tight blue jeans and a pair of heels. He smiled. "Far from it. I was actually thinking about you."

She swung her dangling feet back and forth. "And considering that serious look on your face I'm going to say it wasn't good?"

"I found out what happened to your apartment but it doesn't make any sense."

She furrowed her brow. "Did you go talk to someone who knew?"

"Yeah. I went and saw Lucy."

She hoped down off the counter. "Lucy? Did you run to Europe and back Smallville?"

"No. Just the Metropolis Penitentiary." He mumbled the last part and tried to walk away but she caught it and his arm.

"She's in what?"

"She's in prison."

"So her crime spree finally caught up with her?"

"You could say that."

She turned her head to the side. She opened her mouth but shut it and pulled him to the couch. She sat down in front of him. "Alright talk. And don't give me any of this I don't know bull. You know something."

"Lucy murdered Lex."

Lois's mouth dropped. "She what?"

Clark ran a shaky hand through his hair and sighed. "Alright. Here's the story. You had just saved me and were running out the door when you ran into Lex. He shot me because you kicked him in his...area. You pulled a gun and shot him in the head. The front of his head. The bullet hole was in the back. Lucy was there and hot him, then turned herself in."

"Wait a minute." She grabbed his shirt and started undoing the buttons.

He grabbed her hands. He got a rush from her boldness but needed to know what was going on. "What are you doing?"

"Just need to see something Clark."

He dropped his hands and let her pull his shirt off. She pulled the undershirt over his head and raked her fingers over his skin.

"No scars. No bullet holes."

"My skin heals faster than yours. I did have scars but they went away."

She smiled. "I guess it's good to be an alien huh?"

"Sometime yeah."

He returned her smile and looked into her eyes. She quickly shook off her gaze from him.

"So when can I go-wait. Lex is alive."

"See that's something we've been trying to figure out."

"He has your blood I remember that."

"We just don't know how he's back."

"Well it's best not to dwell on it then." She lifted his arm and stretched it out. "Funny. You used to be 2 times larger."

"Yeah well being a lab rat will do this to you."

"Is there going to be a 'woe is me' moment here? I can leave if you like."

She smirked and continued to examine his arm. He smiled at her. He did miss the way she could cheer him up with her sarcasm.

"Having fun Lois?"

She looked at him. "I guess it's just weird to wake up and see you so skinny. You look anorexic. I have an over whelming feeling to open all the food in the house and shove it down your throat." She punched him in the shoulder and stood.

"Well we could always go eat."

"Let's go into town!"

"Sure. Let me grab my keys."

As he reached for them she grabbed them away. "Race ya there."

He looked at her confused. "Lois are you crazy? That's got to be 10 miles."

"9.75 actually." She swung the door open and started running.

He took off running after her. He was slower than her and she quickly notice. She slowed her pace and jogged beside him. He wasn't sweating but was red and was having a lot of trouble running. She watched his legs as they moved.

"Stop for a second."

He looked at her thankfully. She squatted down beside him and grabbed his leg.

"What are you doing now?"

"Bend you leg."

He put a hand on her shoulder and she lifted his leg. He bent the knee and she watched carefully. The farthest he could bend his leg was about 90 degrees. She touched the back of his knee carefully.

"There's something behind your knee. That's why it hurts to run." She stood. "Same thing with your arms. There's something round in there but it doesn't hurt right?"

He thought for a second. "It hurt when I lifted the tractor. I just chalked it up to being muscles."

She smiled. "You've never been sore have you?"

"Well once. But I was mortal then."

"When you had sex with Lana?"

"How did you know that?"

"Because 2+24 Sherlock. Food is calling, we're gonna have to walk."

"Too tired Lois?"

"Ah. No. You could get hurt. We need to figure out how to remove those ball things before you do something strenuous."

As they walked he noticed her constant looks or worry. Lois doesn't worry.

"Could you stop that?"

"Stop what?"

"Looking at me like you feel sorry for me."

"It's called concern Smallville."

"You're concerned about me? That's a first."

"I'm full of surprises."

"Apparently."

"Is that something I should remember or is that just you being retarded?"

"Hey!"

She smiled. "Oh and I noticed you ditched the flannel Smallville."

"Brings back some bad memories."

"Fair enough."

"You should know what happened Lois. You discovered the reason."

"Alright tell me. What did I find out?"

"When you saved me I was only wearing something that resembled a loin cloth. You were helping me take a bath when you noticed the plaid cloth I was wearing. Lana made it from the shirt I wore the day I was taken. Trying to keep some of me safe."

"I'm going to assume you looked like an anorexic bone then right?"

He smiled. "Yeah."

"And how do you get big again?"

"Exercise. I've got 2 months to get better."

"Well then we better get to work."

"We?"

"DUH! I'm your trainer Smallville. Got to make sure you stay off your butt and do something!"

She punched him in the shoulder and smiled.

"Looking forward to it."

They soon turned the corner into town and were on their way when Clark froze in his tracks. Lois had noticed he stopped a few seconds later.

She turned and walked back to him. "What is your problem now? We're almost there! Then you can eat and sit and rest. Let's move it."

"Lionel."

"What?"

She turned and saw he was starring at Lionel Luthor who was coming their way.

He wanted to turn and run but his body wouldn't listen. Lois snaked her hand inside of his and gave it a gentle squeeze, his nervousness was visible.

"Clark and Lois. Still together and neither dead. What a shame." He pointed to Lois. "And you. I have no idea how you re alive. That antidote was fake, it was more poison."

"I'm here that's all you need to know."

"But there's more to it. Always is, right Clark?"

She stood between them. "You stay the hell away from him Lionel!"

Lionel turned to her. "Lionel? What happened to you're a son of a bitch Mr. Luthor?"

"I can have manners as well."

Lionel stepped forward and put his hand on her face.

Clark grabbed it and squeezed it in his hand until he fell to his knees. "YOU DON'T TOUCH HER!" He flung him on the ground and quickly began to walk away with Lois's hand still in his.

"I could have saved myself."

"I know Lois. I know."

They went into a store and sat in peace. Both secretly playing footsey under the table like children, wide smiles on their faces. They talked about nothing and everything. Neither could remember a happier time. Maybe they were in love.


	19. I Remember Everything

Chapter 19: I Remember Everything

Every time she closed her eyes that night she could see his face looking at her. It was desperate and looked hollow.

He hung by shackles on the wall and no matter how fast she ran to reach him, some how he would end up farther away from her.

There was no light in the place she was running in; there was only his body, his face and his voice.

"Help me." He croaked as she fell in exhaustion. She looked up one last time to see him an inch away closing his eyes. "Lois..." He whispered to her, the pain in his voice filling her ear drums.

"Lois. It's alright." She felt strong arms engulf her, pulling her into a loving embrace.

She opened her eyes with a gasp. Clark was rocking her back and forth in his arms.

"Clark..." She sniffled, not realizing she had already coated his shirt with her tears.

"Shh..." He cooed at her. "It's alright."

She pushed away from him enough to look into his eyes. She wrapped her arms around his waist, pressing her ear to his heart. "I had a nightmare."

"I know. I heard you crying so I woke up. You want to talk about it?"

"No. I'm just glad you are ok Smallville." She patted his shoulder and slumped back down into the bed.

She wouldn't go to sleep anymore that night for fear that she would see him like that again. The more she tried to push it away the more it came to the forefront of her mind. She heard him snore softly behind her and smiled.

'I love you Clark.'

Whoa. Where did that come from? And why did she want to say it to him?

She looked down at his hands, pressed lightly against her stomach. She felt his head nuzzle closely to her neck and it made butterflies shoot wildly though her. Somehow that felt nice.

Normally, she knew, she would be afraid of these feelings. But right now she was afraid that if she got up and left something awful would happen to him. Being the person she is she would never admit the fear.

She felt his breath blowing against her ear; it sent cold chills down her spine. How was he doing this to her? She smiled. Two can play that game.

She pushed back into him and worked her hips from side to side. His breathing faltered against her ear and his hands tightened on her waist.

"Lois..." He moans. One of his hands slid down lower and racked across her lightly.

She quickly grabbed his hand to remove it but found that she held it in place instead.

When she felt a hard line pressing against her she knew he was just as awake as she was. She turned in his arms and bent up to kiss him. As soon as their lips touched she knew she had never felt anything this right.

She greedily sucked at his lips and moved her leg between his. She grazed him until he pressed his legs together to stop her. He gasped into her mouth and rolled himself over top of her.

"What are you- Ah...- doing Lois?" He whispered with his lips touching hers.

She kissed him and sucked on his lips. "What does it feel like? I'm seducing you!"

She eagerly stuck her tongue between his lips and gained access to his mouth. She lightly stroked his tongue in a suggestive manner and earned a moan in return.

"Lois..." He pulled back against his will and looked down at her.

"Why did you stop?"

"Are you sure that you want this?"

"If I didn't I wouldn't try."

She grabbed his face before he said anything else and pulled his lips back to hers. She never knew Clark could kiss her like this. She never knew one kiss could make her swoon like this.

He leaned his weight down on her slowly; afraid that she felt him she would snap out of this. He couldn't believe this Lois was doing this. But God he was so happy she was.

She moaned in content as he finally pressed down on her. His hand slid down from her face and across her shirt until it reached her breast. She gasped into his mouth as he gave it a light squeeze before pressing it into his palm.

In response she swiveled her hips into his making his kiss falter for only a second. He quickly recovered and moved down to kiss her neck; suckling and nibbling her tanned, silky skin.

"Clark? Are you in here?" They broke apart as the door opened to reveal Martha Kent on the other side. "I need to speak with you. Now."

He looked at the clock then down at Lois. "I'm kind of busy, come back in an hour or so."

"Clark Kent! Out here, NOW!"

He glared at her and saw that she wouldn't leave. He sighed and gave Lois one last kiss before reluctantly rolling away from her. He stood and walked out the door into the hallway then shut the door. He heard the bed creak and Lois sneak up to the door to listen.

"Clark I want you to know how much I love you."

"Mom. I know you used to love me before all of this happened. Why has everything changed about you so much?" He caught the glimmer of a ring as she turned slightly. He grabbed her hand as she looked away ashamed. "What is this?"

"It's an engagement ring. I'm engaged to Lionel."

He dropped her hand and stepped away from her slowly. "How could you?"

"Clark I love him."

"Oh. So the fact that he tortured me for two years has no effect on you?"

She looked at him pleadingly. "Clark when we got engaged I had no idea he was doing those things to you."

"Then why is that ring still on your finger?"

"I need time to think about this."

He opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out. He wanted to scream, to curse her but he couldn't force himself to do it. "Why did you pull me out here?"

"Oliver has escaped."

"Are you sure he escaped or did you let him go?"

"Clark I would never do such a thing!"

"BULL SHIT! You are engaged to a man who tried to kill me! I don't believe anything you say!"

"Clark please..."

"No. I have no respect for you. How dare you do this to dad's memory?" She froze. "Oh, Dad? You remember him don't you? A good man that loved you more than anything! He's probably looking down at you right now ashamed of you! Ashamed that he could have loved someone like you. I know I am." She burst into tears and he felt a pang of guilt in his heart. "How-" His throat closed up as he spoke. He stepped towards her and whispered. "You are a disgrace to this family."

He turned and walked back into his room as Lois scurried out of the way. He lay down in the bed and pulled the covers securely around him. Lois stood at the closed door watching as he curled into a ball and let out a soft cry. Her heart broke for him but she didn't know what to do. Would he get mad if she touched him? 'He needs me.'

She took a step into the bed and rested her head carefully on his shoulder. He turned to her and wrapped his arms around her. He bawled into her hair as she stroked his arms. She knew this was killing him and all he wanted was her right now. So that's what she would give him.

Much like moments before, positions switched, she comforted him. "It's alright Clark. It's ok."

"How could she do this to me?"

"Don't think about it right now, ok? You need to rest. I'm here now and I won't leave you."

"Thank you." She kissed the top of his head and rested back into his arms. "I missed you."

"When?"

"While I was locked in that room. I wanted you there with me. I wanted to know you were alright."

"Always selfless." She felt him smile. "Go to sleep Clark. We can talk in the morning."

"I love you." He gave her a gentle squeeze.

"I love you too Smallville." She whispered to his chest.

"What?"

She craned her head up to meet his confused eyes. "I said I love you."

"I thought you loved Oliver?"

"The only man I had ever felt this way about is you." He leaned downward and gave her a soft kiss on the lips. It felt like the first time they had ever connected. "Clark?" She whispered as they slowly pulled away.

"Yeah?"

"I never meant to make you leave."

He quickly looked down at her. "How did you know about that?"

She looked at him with tear filled eyes. "I remember everything."

His mouth dropped and he pulled her closer to him. She wrapped her arms around him till she was too tried to hold her lids open anymore. 'We can talk in the morning.'

These woods have become her haven from the world. She snuck out here when no one was looking to be alone. All those days she cried because of him would erupt to anger and screams in these woods.

She had known Clark was there all along and had chosen to do nothing in order to protect Lois, Chloe and herself. They would hate her if they knew.

She picked up the picture of his drooping head and gave it a quick kiss. If only he knew. She remembered the day like it was yesterday.

She stormed into Lionel's office. "Where is he?"

He looked over his glass of scotch. "He would be?"

She grabbed his desk and flipped it. "MY SON! What have you done to him?"

He grabbed her arms. "Calm down Martha. Clark is not-"

She turned her head as she heard his very distinct scream. She looked at Lionel and jerked free. She ran down the hall into a room with a one way mirror.

She pressed her hand against the glass as she watched the bullets enter his naked body then him drop to the floor in the pool of blood the bullets had created.

Lionel walked up behind her. "There is nothing you can do."

"Why are you doing this to my son? What has he ever done to you?"

"We need to know everything about him we can Martha."

"You know enough!" She grabbed the door.

"He's never getting free."

"He doesn't deserve this!"

"You can't do anything to stop it."

"I will do everything I can to stop this!"

"If you want Lois and Chloe to live you will do nothing."

"You can't do this."

"I can and I am."

She had suppressed it for so long she just let Lionel take over her life. Lois was still at risk, she couldn't break off the engagement for that reason.

She took the needle and slid it through the fabric again. It was made from something Lionel had pulled from the caves and she stole it. It was a Kryptonian fabric that only came in primary colors. She looked at the suit and held it up. It still lacked something unique, a symbol, his birth name.

She walked through the mansion, fear bleeding from her every pore. She knew when she saw Lex again it would all be over.

Everything changed. She remembered years ago when she loved Clark and she was everything to him. She missed being the center of some one so special's world. She would never be forgiven.

"Lana."

She turned quickly. "Oliver?" She ran into his arms. "Are you ok? I haven't seen you in days!"

"I escaped form the Kent's."

"I've been hiding in the woods from Lex."

"Why?"

She pulled him into another hallway. "I gave Clark the antidote."

He pulled from her grasp. "You what? Do you know how much trouble we are in?"

"I had to do it!"

"You could have at least let me in on it."

She did a double take. "Wait. What?"

"I'm still on Clark's side as are you."

"Well you are a better actor than me. You had everyone fooled. But you fighting Clark and giving him that injection what was that?"

"I gave him that shot out of jealousy. Me fighting him was unintended really. What are your reasons for doing of that to him those years?"

Lana dropped her head. "I never wanted to marry Lex. Lionel made me. He said that if I didn't he'd kill Clark. It just escalated from there. If I didn't help he said he would kill Mrs. Kent, Lois, Chloe and Clark. I had to. I was afraid."

"And what's changed Lana?"

"I can't see him hurt anymore. I know he doesn't trust me. I know that we can never be together but the least I can do is give him his life back."

"What are you going to do?"

"Anything I can."

Oliver smiled. "Sounds like a plan to me."

Clark rose from the bed slowly, being sure to not awaken the sleeping figure beside him. He gave her a soft kiss on the forehead and slipped out the door. He quickly made it down the steps after slipping into a pair of shorts and a shirt. He grabbed his shoes and pulled them on. He exhaled as he stepped out the door into the sunlight.

She stirred when the bed tilted but remained stilled as he walked around the bed. She fought a smile as her kissed her softly on the forehead. She heard the door open and shut and fought the temptation to follow him. But her nosiness got the better of her and she quickly followed suit. She hid behind the couch until he left out the door then quickly pulled her shoes on. She slipped out the door and ran behind him.

He heard her the second he went out the door. He smiled. 'Time to test my speed.'

She watched closely as she saw his body language change. He seemed to take a deep breath and then he disappeared. She suddenly felt a strong pair of arms wrap around her and she screamed.

"You can't sneak up on me Miss Lane." He swung her around in a circle.

"Can to. One of these days. I'll get you Smallville."

"Sure. Keep telling yourself that." He kissed her neck and set her down.

"Where are you headed Smallville?"

"I was just out for a jog."

"Care if I join?"

He smiled. "Be my guest!" He leaned in to give her another kiss but she darted away from him. He opened his eyes. "What's wrong?"

She started circling him. "You seem to be feeling better."

"Yeah, lots."

"You owe me something."

She stopped behind him and he didn't turn. "Owe you something? Like what?"

He felt a kick to his butt and he turned to see her arms up ready to punch. "A fight." She swung her fist and he caught it in midair.

He pulled her into him. "I'm not fighting you Lois."

She elbowed him in the ribs. "Yes you are." She dropped out of his grasp and kicked his legs out from under him. "Clark Kent: easily beat by a girl. How sad."

He looked up at her. "Not working."

"Oh really?" She grabbed his shirt and pulled him up. "I'll find something that will." She flung him back and resumed circling him.

She took her time gazing upon him searching for a spot to knock him down with. He remained still under her gaze, it was unnerving. He listened as her heart beat picked up and he turned, catching her foot before it hit his knees.

She smiled as he dropped her foot. "I can do this all day Smallville."

"What good would it do Lois? You can't win."

She narrowed her eyes. "Can't win?"

He shook his head. "Lois..."

"I can't win? Let me respond to that in the following way."

She dropped to the ground and kicked up into his chest as she fell back. She sent him flying back. She jumped on top of him as he hit the ground and punched him in the face.

"Lois stop! You're going to get hurt!" He grabbed her fists and held them in place.

She leaned up on her arms and chopped his sides with her legs. "You're not invincible yet." She whispered.

He let go of her hands and grabbed his sides, he felt the pain of her blows racking at his nerves. He jumped up and stood, feet planted, eyes narrowed.

"Hit me Clarkie. Or are you scared?" She resumed her circle. He gritted his teeth. "Aw is little Clarkie cracking?" She pushed at his back and he tensed. She leaned into his ear. "Hit me." She watched his shoulders tense. "Your strength means nothing now. You're just as weak as you were then." She mentally slapped herself for what she said next. "Alien."

She saw something in him snap as he turned and threw his fist at her. She blocked it with her forearm. "Is that it? Come on Kal-el! Make daddy proud!"

He threw his fist again. "Shut up!"

"Lana knows how to shut you up doesn't she?"

He kicked her stomach and threw her back. He swung her fist and hit her forearm that blocked her face. She winced but fought back. She spin kicked into his ribs and dodged his next attack.

She looked up from where she was squatting and saw his cold stare reflected back. What happened next she didn't anticipate. His eyes set back in his head and he fell back on to the ground out cold.

The figure behind him stepped forward and she let out a gasp when she saw him. He tuched Clark's face and looked at her.

"He'll be alright soon enough."

"Why did you do that?"

"He could have hurt you."

"I was in control! I knew what I was doing."

"Did he?" He stood and brushed off his pants.

"No."

"Then you weren't in control." He starred at her.

"Who are you?" She asked.

"Does it matter?"

"Fine. If I don't get a name then how did you know how to knock him out?"

He smiled. "I know everything about Clark Kent."


	20. Stranger

Chapter 20: Stranger

She watched as the man packed Clark back to the house. Her initial reaction was out the window, he seemed nice enough. But that was the exterior and she knew he had an ulterior motive. He had to.

"Is this where you live Miss?"

She shook out of her thoughts and looked at him. "Excuse me?"

He smiled sweetly to her. "Is this where you live?"

She looked at the drive way he stood in front of and followed it up to the house. "How did you know that?"

He sighed. "I told you. I know everything about Clark Kent." He was polite, though his words could be taken as otherwise. He began to walk forward again.

"Then why did you ask me if I lived here?"

"It's called being nice." That was kind of snarky.

She snarled her nose at his remark. That sounded a lot like something Clark would say to her. In fact, now that she looked at him, he resembled Clark a lot. His hair was just as black and he had the same facial features but he was bigger and had a more confident aurora about him. She had to know.

"Clark?" She called out as if it was him.

His head turned ever so slightly to the mention of the name.

'I'm good.'

He laughed it off. "He's knocked out Miss."

She stopped. "And what if I wasn't talking to him?"

He kept walking but his figure tensed. "What are the odds that we could have the same name Miss?"

She cringed at him. "My name is Lois! I know you know that! What are the odds that you two are the same person?"

He scoffed. "That's impossible."

"So I thought." She ran in front of him and opened the door to let him in.

He set Clark down on the couch and pulled a blanket over him. He turned back around to find Lois wit her arms crossed and her stamping her foot at him.

"So Smallville, I'm waiting."

"Look, I'm not who you seem to think I am Miss Lane."

"I never told you my last name! You suck at lying to me! You should really work on that!" She looked him up and down.

He sighed and gave up. "Fine. Yes I'm Clark." He rolled his eyes. "She told me I'd never fool you."

"Who is she?"

He smiled. "The future you."

She uncrossed her arms and shrugged. "I do know myself well."

He smiled. "Let's hope so."

She continued to look him over and was surprised at how much he had changed. "Why are you here?"

He shook his head. "Straight to the point, huh?"

She stepped forward. "And you are avoiding the question?"

He sighed again. "I can't tell you why I am here. When I was his age an older me showed up. That's all you can know."

She walked into the living room and sat down on the coffee table. She lightly placed her hand on Clark's head and stroked his hair. "Is everything going to turn out ok?"

He sat down beside her. "I'm here aren't I?"

"I meant in 2 months. When all hell breaks loose."

He starred at her and with regret he said, "I can't tell you that either."

"Can you tell me anything?"

He smiled at her inpatients. "In due time."

"That's not good enough."

"I'm sorry."

She looked at him. He sat up straighter than the present tense does. Then something registered in her mind. "Can you remove the ball things from his arms and legs?"

He looked at her with a serious expression. "Yeah. That's what I'm supposed to do first."

He just sat there and looked Clark over. She watched him. "Why aren't you doing anything?"

"He has to wake up first. I don't want to scare him to death."

"How long till he wakes up?"

"Not to long."

"Are you here to help him train?"

"That's one thing."

She laughed. "That's number 2. You can't count in the future."

He smiled. "Sorry. I wasn't keeping track."

They sat in silence for a few minutes. She put her hand inside of Clark's and she could feel the stare of the older him on their hands. "What?"

He shook out of his reverie. "I didn't want to come here." He stated truthfully.

"Why? You're saving yourself."

"I know. A part of me wants to be here more than anything. But the other part of me wishes I was home. In order to come here I had to leave everything I care about."

She put her hand to his mouth then pointed to Clark on the couch. She pulled him into the kitchen. "Continue."

"I just miss my wife and well..." He blushed and looked at her with the widest smile she had ever seen. "She's pregnant."

She put her hand to her forehead. "Please tell me it's not Lana you are married to."

He shook his head and dropped his smile. "No! I could never spend my life with her."

"So you finally snapped out of your stupid spell. Thank God!"

"I've been over her for a while Lois."

"Do you mean that you?" She pointed over her shoulder to the unconscious him.

"Yes."

She gulped. "Oh. That's good to know." She looked around the room trying to find something to talk to him about. This silence was killing her, and his smile was distracting her. "So tell me about this wife of yours." She let her hint of jealousy slip on accident and hoped he hadn't caught it.

He smirked and knew he did. "She makes me the man that I am. With her I have everything I've ever wanted. She's perfect for me, even though she doesn't think she's perfect."

She smiled at his enthusiasm. "I'm glad you finally found someone Smallville. Smallville. Do I still call you that?"

"Yes. Every chance you get."

"Good. I'm glad it stuck." She didn't want to be selfish but she had to know. "What about me?"

He took caution at her words. "What about you?"

"Am I happy?" She whispered.

He smiled. "Very."

"Am I single?"

"No. You are married."

She smiled at him. "Did you go to my wedding?"

"Yep, I did. You told me you'd kick my ass if I didn't show. And if I do say so myself, you looked absolutely beautiful."

"Thanks Clark."

He put a hand on her shoulder. The stairs behind them creaked and he slowly turned around.

Martha starred at him wide eyes. "Who is this Lois?"

Lois looked at him looked for some resentment towards her but only saw his sad expression that crossed his face before it was covered with a loving one. "This is Clark Kent, from the future."

He smiled at her as a tear slipped down his face. "Hi Mom." He walked over to her and bent down to give her a hug.

Martha smiled over his shoulder. "Watch that steel grip there son."

He released her and kissed her on the cheek.

"What's with the special greeting?"

"Nothing. I just wanted to give you a hug and a kiss."

She smiled at him sweetly then remembered why she came down in the first place. "Well I'm off to Metropolis. I have something to take care of."

"Is a disengagement party one of those things?"

Clark turned swiftly to her. "Lois. Don't."

"Why are you defending her? She doesn't deserve it."

"Lois. You don't understand right now why I am. Go ahead Mom. You have fun. I love you." He gave her another hug and kiss.

Lois watched as she walked out the door and turned to see him watching her with a sense of remorse. She opened her mouth to say something but quickly shut it as she heard Clark stir behind her.

She ran in there and sat down beside him.

"Lois?" He asked in a whisper.

"Yeah? Right here Smallville." She put her hand back in his.

"What happened? Wh-" He looked past her to the figure standing at the door and jumped up. "Who's that?" He pulled Lois protectively behind him.

He flipped the lights on and took a step forward. "I'm Clark Kent."

"What?" He turned to Lois for answers.

"He's the future you."

"Catch him."

She looked at the future him. "Huh?"

Clark fainted from rush of blood into Lois's arms. She smiled at him sheepishly. "Nice call."

-

He opened his eyes again to see them both starring at him. He exhaled slowly and sat up. He kept his eyes on the man beside her. They weren't talking, but they both had similar looks on their faces; both unreadable.

He felt Lois's smaller hand inside his own and he gave it a soft squeeze. "So you are the older me?"

"Yes."

"How? I mean how did you get here?"

"Jor-el sent me back."

Lois turned her head and looked at him. "Something bad is going to happen isn't it?"

The older Clark put his hand on Lois's knee. "Don't ever think that Lois."

Clark watched his hand on her leg and felt a pang of jealousy in his heart. The older him quickly retracted his hand as he remembered how the younger him felt. He was protective over her, just like he was over his wife and child.

"Um...Lois if you don't mind I want to talk to him alone." He glared at him as he sat there innocently.

She glanced between them. "Sure. I'll go upstairs and take a shower." She kissed him on the cheek and ran up the stairs.

Clark watched her leave and then turned back. "So you are really me huh?"

"Yes. In a few years from now."

"Good to know I get all my strength back."

"I'm here to help you with that."

"What about Lois? What is she supposed to do?"

He gave Clark a knowing smile. "Lois is going to find her way on her own for a while."

"I will not let you take her from me."

"I know that. I would never do that. You seen to forget that I am you."

"Well I am not you yet and I don't know what's going to happen like you do."

"True. But I do know you trust me." He stood and helped Clark up.

"How did you knock me out?"

"I hit the lead casing behind your knee. It pinched some nerves and sent too many signals to your brain."

"Why did you do it?"

He pointed to the bathroom above. "You were going to hurt her."

"I wouldn't-"

"You would have." He crossed his arms over his chest in challenge. He had more knowledge and confidence than Clark did now. He also knew that it pissed Clark off. "I'm not here to make you angry. I'm here to help you get your life back so you'll be ready."

"Ready for what?"

"Anything. But first we need to get your physical condition up to par."

"I can't run or lift with this lead in me."

"That's where I come in."

Clark took a wary step back. "What are you going to do?"

"Remove them." He said simply.

"Re-remove them?" He stuttered.

The older him smiled. "It doesn't hurt as bad as you think. It will hurt worse the longer we leave them in there."

He heard the shower start above his head. "What about Lois? Can she be down here?"

"No. She'll freak out. She barely got that needle in you and she didn't remove those bullets or glad."

Clark rung his hands and started looking around. He didn't know if this was fear or just the thought of being cut open again. Maybe it was both. "Where do I go?"

"The couch should be fine. It won't take but a few minutes."

They turned and walked to the couch. He laid down and waited for him to sit beside him on the coffee table. The older him picked up his arm and Clark watched. He straightened his arm and Clark could see the ball rising up.

He pointed at it. "That's the lead. All I have to do is burn a hole in your skin and pull it out."

Clark caught a shake in his voice. "Are you sure you can do this? You're scared."

"I have to do this. Are you ready?"

Clark gripped the couch and waited. He heard him take a deep breath and count it off. He tightened his lids shut as he began to feel the burn of his heat vision. The smell of burning flesh filled his nostrils and the churn of nausea filled his stomach.

He felt a hand grip his arm and two fingers dive through his flesh. He gritted his teeth against the urge to scream. Then as sudden as it came the pain was gone. He felt his skin heal over and then he opened his eyes.

The older him looked down at him and smiled. He took his hand and placed the ball in it for him to examine. It looked like a gun shot from the Civil War.

"That was it?"

"Yes. 3 more to go."

He watched carefully, this time, as he worked on the other arm and realized it didn't hurt that bad. He flipped over and let him get them out of his legs.

When it was over he looked at the clock and found out that not even 10 minutes had passed.

"Thank you."

"No problem."

He stood with an ease that had little known to him. It had been so long since he had moved without pain he felt like he was moving for the first time. "Wow." He whispered.

"Can you super speed?" He asked curiously.

"It flashes on and off. I can't control it completely."

"But you can?"

"Yes."

"Good we can work on that."

Clark thought for a second. "Haven't you done all of this?"

"Yes."

"Then why don't you know the answers to your own questions?"

He smiled. "My memory is rusty on this. When you do this, you won't remember every detail either." He suddenly turned his head to the side and began listening to something.

"What's wrong?" He tuned his hearing trying to listen to what he was hearing but didn't hear anything.

His facial expression became stern and he turned to the door and looked out. Clark grabbed his arm but he didn't lose focus. "What do you hear?"

"I'll be right back." He raced out the door as Clark watched in awe. He didn't know he was that fast or maybe that's how fast he would become.

Clark heard a door slam shut upstairs and turned to see Lois walking down the stairs only in a towel. He gulped.

"Where's the future you?"

"He-" His throat closed as he watched a bead of water slip in between her breasts from her beautiful hair. He cleared his throat and tried again. "He heard something and sped away. I don't know where he went exactly."

"Oh. Did he do anything useful?"

Clark smiled. "Yeah. He removed the lead from my arms and legs."

"They feel better now?"

"So much better. It's so much easier to move."

"Good." She answered audibly.

"He said he would help me with my training."

She walked over the fridge. "Good."

"He said something about you too."

"Really? That's nice."

He furrowed his brow and walked up behind her. "What's wrong Lois?"

She whirled around and faced him. "Did he tell you why he's here?"

"No."

She shook her finger at him. "He's up to something."

He grabbed her hand. "He can hear you Lois."

A gust of wind broke through the house. "He's right. But I'm not up to anything Lois." He smiled at her and suddenly she felt all her doubts waver. Her heart was on the verge of melting.

This didn't go unnoticed by Clark who was glancing between them. "Ok. Will you stop looking at her like that?"

The older him blushed and turned away. "I'm sorry."

"You keep touching her and looking at her like that. What is your problem? Is there something I should know?"

The older him opened his mouth but Lois intervened. "Since when have you been protective over me? I don't appreciate it."

"I wasn't talking to you."

She stood between them. "Do I have to kick your ass again Smallville?"

Clark stepped forward. "You didn't kick my ass!" He pointed behind him. "He knocked me out!"

"Ok. Enough!" The older him stepped in between them.

He turned to Lois. "You are about to say something you regret, please don't."

He turned to Clark. "You need to get a grip before you blow a gasket. Back away."

Clark stood firmly in his spot. "Back away before someone gets hurt and we both regret it."

Clark took a step back. "Good." He turned back to Lois. "You can't fight him because he doesn't have control of his powers yet. If I hadn't knocked him out he would have lost control. You would be seriously hurt. So take a moment and consider that before you say anything else."

"But-"

"Listen to him Lois. This is stupid."

"This is stupid?" She stepped around Clark. "Every time he says something to me you look like you want to kill him! That is stupid!" She pushed him. "You are stupid!" She screamed.

He grabbed her arms as she went to push him again.

"Let me go."

"No."

"Clark...I'm warning you..."

"Lois...don't."

"You can't boss me around. I'm not your little pink princess."

He jerked away from her when she said it. As soon as the words left her mouth she regretted it. Her heart dropped as she saw the tears rise from his eyes.

"Clark..."

He shook his head and stepped back again. "How dare you bring up Lana?"

She turned the older him who was watching Clark carefully. "Help me." She whispered. He simply pointed her back to him. She turned. "I'm sorry Clark. I didn't mean to say that, it slipped."

"How dare you?" He sped away.

She ran after him as long as she could but ran back in the house. She grabbed his arms and shook him. "Take me to him." She begged. He just stood there and looked at her. "TAKE ME TO HIM!" She beat her fists against his chest. He allowed her to do it until the tears slipped from her eyes and his heart couldn't take it anymore.

He wrapped his arms around her and rocked her back and forth. "Think before you say Lois." He whispered into her hair.

"He hates me."

"He's just angry."

She looked up at him. "He'll come back right?"

"I can't tell you."

She pushed away from him. "What good are you? You can't seem to tell me anything!"

"Think about that Lois. If I answered all of your questions the future would change. You couldn't be happily married, neither would I." He stated as calmly as he could.

She ran up to her room and fell on to her bed. Their room, their bed. She grabbed his pillow and inhaled his scent. She cried into it.

He stood down below and listened. He let one of his own tears slip as she cried. He wanted to tell her but it wouldn't be the right thing to do. He had to think about his future from this point.

He was sitting in the kitchen when it started to rain. Funny how the Heavens can reflect your mood.

He looked at his watch and counted down the seconds until Clark back into the house.

"Three...two..one." He looked to the door and watched the drenched him walk in.

He walked over to the counter and looked up at the man an older reflection of himself.

In his eyes he had hate and pain but over all her had love. It pained him to just watch not knowing if there was anything he could do.

He drug himself in to the living room and fell on the sofa, the older him knowing he wanted to be in the room with her telling her everything was ok. One of her shirts remained on the sofa from earlier and he grabbed it. He inhaled its scent and then cried into it.

To them he was a stranger invading and running their lives. But what was stranger was remembering everything before it gets a chance to happen.


	21. Pure Evil

Chapter 21: Pure Evil

"On your feet solider!"

Lucy turned swiftly and saw her father on the inside of her bars. "You're off duty dad."

She watched as he walked closer to her almost with a hint of fear and she smirked. She looked just beyond him to the 3 people standing inside now being locked in. The male she didn't knock casually walked over to the corner and Lois followed him. She looked at Clark who had a look of utter pain on his face.

"Clark? You can sit by me if you like."

He looked at her and shook his head, quickly sitting by Lucy but never taking his eyes off of Lois and the other man. He had looked up at the mention of Clark's name.

'Curious.'

The General turned and extended his hand to the man. "I'm not sure we have met. I'm General Sam Lane, Lois and Lucy's father."

He smiled and took his hand. "Clark Kent, we have met."

The General dropped his hand and turned between him and the Clark he knew.

"Future me." He muttered uncaringly.

"Right." He turned back to Lucy. "Well. What do you have to say in your defense?"

She gave him a tight smile. "I'd do it again if I got the chance."

"No regrets?" Lois piped in.

"Non. I save his scrawny butt for you."

A ringing was echoed throughout the room and the General cleared his throat. He stepped outside and left.

Lucy walked around in a pace and stopped in front of the older Clark.

"Why are you here?"

"He can't tell you that." Lois said bitterly.

Lucy turned and looked at her. "Go sit by Clark and shut up."

Lois looked at Clark who was starring holes into the floor. "You don't give me orders."

Lucy pointed at the guard. "Then you can leave."

She sat on the opposite end of Clark and watched him warily. He stood and walked over to the corner. Lois bit her lip to hold in a strand of tears. She looked to the older him and dropped her gaze.

Lucy then turned and looked at him. He had a stern look on his face that could easily be mistaken for anger.

"What is going on here?"

The older man looked at her. "Something they have to fix on their own."

Lucy eyed him carefully. The bars opened again and the General stepped back inside. He looked around as the silence engulfed the room.

"You'll be happy to know Mr. Luthor has decided to drop all charges against you."

Lucy gaped at him. "I'm free?"

The General laughed. "Far from it. You are staying your full sentence."

"Even though-"

"I don't give a dmn what your reasons for shooting him are. You shot and nearly killed Lex Luthor. You have to pay the price."

"Always knew you'd come to the rescue dad."

"You got yourself into this mess. Don't blame me for doing my job."

"Which job? Are you the General or the Father?"

He looked at her sternly. "Both."

She walked up to him, inches away from his face. "You never were a father to either of us! You play the General 24/7!"

"Lucy." He said coldly.

"Don't 'Lucy' me. It's every bit of the truth and you know it. We know how hard it was to lose mom but what hurt even worse was to lose you as well. You died right along with mom."

He looked around the room nervously at the surprised faces. He cleared his throat yet again and turned to walk out when Lois stood.

"Coward." She said coldly. She walked up to Lucy and put an arm around her waist.

He didn't even bother to turn. He walked out even faster.

The older Clark looked at the younger him who was still starring at the floor. He didn't remember what was running through his mind at the time and that's what worried him the most.

Lois turned her head and looked at Clark, then guilt overrode the feeling of confidence she had just had. She didn't know how to reach him. He built a visible barrier around himself and wasn't talking to anyone. The older him seemed worried, she was nervous.

-

He strode down the hall, the black leather trench coat wiping around as he walked. He looked from side to side checking each room that passed for his target. He stopped on a dime and pulled the custom made 9 mil from one of the front pockets. He ccked the gun and walked into the office where his father had nodded off, oblivious to the man with a mission.

He pulled his chair back away from the desk and pushed him into the wall. His head snapped back into the wall as he woke with a start.

"What's going on Lex? That wasn't necessary!"

Lex gave him a wicked smile. "When were you going to tell me about them dad?"

Lionel looked at him confused. "What are you talking about?"

Lex rolled his eyes and brought the gun to Lionel's face. "Don't toy with me!" He screamed.

"Lex! I don't-"

"Know what I am talking about?" He pistol whipped him across the face and grabbed the back of his shirt. "Get up."

"What are you doing?"

He shoved Lionel forward. "Showing you your handy work dad!"

She shoved him out the door and walked behind down the hall into the wing where all the research on Clark had been done.

They walked into a seemingly empty room and Lex locked the door.

Lionel faced him quickly at the sound of the bolts locking. "Why are you showing me an empty room Lex?"

Lex laughed manically. "Empty? You say this is an empty room." Lex hit the second set of lights that had been blended into the wall.

Lionel turned and watched as the lights crept on down through the room on to the thousands of incubators. He gulped and looked at Lex again. He had the gun pointed at his face.

"Funny how one day I was looking through this wing and I find all these incubators with Luthorcorp insignias on them. And to make it even better..." He walked up to one and smashed the pistol against the glass, shattering it and making the occupant fall forward. Lex grabbed the face and shoved it at his father. "They're clones of me!" He threw the clone at Lionel. "Why are they here?"

Lionel gave him a wicked smiled. "Because this is how I brought you back. I created thousands of replicas of your original body and only the one you're in came out right. The rest of these are failures."

Lex looked around. "Why didn't they work?"

Lionel grabbed a stack of papers. "Many reasons. Some hearts wouldn't pump, some organs would explode. Some wouldn't except Clark's blood. A lot of things Lex."

"What number am I?"

Number 2."

"Why number 2? What happened to number 1?"

Lionel pointed at the incubator beside him. "It wasn't of you."

Lex walked up to the incubator and looked carefully into the glass. "It's a clone of you."

"In case I ever need it."

Lex smiled. "Sooner than you think." Lex pulled the gun once against and back Lionel into the nearest wall.

"What are you doing Lex?" He asked nervously.

"I'm being the son you always wanted. Ruthless and uncaring. And it seems you are trying to steal my spotlight dad. Can't have that now can we?"

Lex gave him one last smile and pulled the trigger. Lionel Luthor sunk to the floor, his life gone.

-

"I miss her."

The older him looked up with a frown. He was thinking about Lois again. "I know."

"How do I make this pain stop? My heart...My heart it hurts so much."

"It won't stop until you talk to her."

He gasped for breath through his tears. "I can't. The nightmares...Oh God the nightmares. I wish they would end." He buried his face deep into his hands. "Every time we fight they get worse. I can't stop them anymore. I just keep seeing myself dying. And now I think I'm dying on the inside."

Lois peeped around the corner and watched.

"Then forgive." He stated simply.

"I can't."

"You can. You're just being hard headed. If you love her as much as I remember, then forgive her." He stood and walked out the door. He maneuvered around Lois and stopped for a second. He turned and looked at her with a smile then continued out to the loft.

She walked into the living room. Clark still refused to look at her from his position on the couch. She went over slowly, sat by him and to her surprise he didn't walk away.

"I'm sorry Clark."

"I know Lois."

"I didn't mean to mention her. You know me and my big mouth. Just can't seem to shut up...I just keep talking myself into a hole. Then there's a mess and-"

"Lois. I get it."

She gave him an awkward smile. "Sorry." He looked up at her with a smile. "That's it. That's the smile I've missed so much."

She leaned forward carefully and met him halfway into the kiss. Their lips had barely even started to touch when his hands grabbed her waist, pulling her closer to him. Impossibly closer.

She turned in his embrace and wrapped her arms around his neck.

They took their time, slow and simple. When she would turn her head, he would turn his. When she moved he would pull her closer.

She slowly slid her tongue out and tasted him making a smile spread across his lips.

He pulled back and rested his forehead against hers. "Why can't it always be this way?"

"I don't know. I wish it would."

He looked into her eyes. "I love you."

"I love you too."

He smiled and gave her a quick peck before leaned back against the couch. She threw her leg over his waist and straddled him. He watched her movements and smiled up at her. "Whatcha doin?"

She put her finger to his lips and whispered sh. She grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head. She threw it on the floor without taking her eyes away from his. She leaned forward and kissed his neck slowly up to his ear.

"Can you feel that?" She whispered seductively. She licked his ear and blew on it. He moaned underneath her, giving her an answer. "Good."

She slowly kissed down his shoulder and smiled as he got goose bumps across the areas that she had previously touched. She lightly bit his skin and sucked, then made a mental note as he growled below her. She kissed across his chest and ground her hips into his groin.

He gasped and grabbed her, lifted her up off of him. He flipped them over and sprawled himself across her body. He looked down at her, eyes conveying a hunger for her body. She returned the stare.

He crashed his lips upon hers and kissed her like his life depended on it. He could feel her nails raking up his back and he get cold chills all throughout his body except one place where there was a heat building up to an explosion.

He pressed her body into the couch and ground against her until she was moaning for more. He trailed kisses to her neck and licked her pulse, barely biting it making it increase seemingly ten fold.

"Clark..." She whimpered. She grabbed one of his hands and pulled it down her body forcing him to touch her breast sooner.

He gave it a light squeeze before taking her nipple in his fingers, hardening it impossibly more. Her hips jerked up into him at the action, pushing into his growing erection.

He gasped into her neck and squeezed her breast even harder. He wanted her to push into him again, he wanted to feel that heat of her again. She didn't disappoint as she jerked up into him again. This time they both moaned as she held herself up against him.

She thought she was burning alive. It's the middle of February. Why is it so hot? She sighed in relief as he grabbed the hem of her shit and started pulling it up. She felt his hand slide behind her back and lift her up to pull it off. She moaned at his skin on hers, she loved that feeling. She needed more of it. She needed to touch more of him.

He threw the shirt on the floor and she leaned pack up to capture his mouth. She carefully snuck her hand between them and ran her finger around the button of his pants before walking her fingers lower.

He couldn't kiss anymore; his brain was seriously losing blood. She looked down at her wicked smiled as she cupped him. His eyes rolled back in his head from the pleasure of her fingers tracing him. He pushed into her hand and she pressed her hand flat against him.

She bent up to his ear and whispered. "Take your pants off. I need you..."

He almost jumped up off of her in the hurry to tear his pants off. God he had never been so excited in his life. He probably looked like an idiot dancing around trying desperately to pull them off. He reached for the rim of his boxers when he felt her hands on his. She pulled them away from the band and pulled him back onto her.

His mouth moved to the open skin on her chest and his hands moved to remove her bra. He accidentally broke the clasp as she pushed herself more into his mouth. He got it off of her none the less.

He leaned up to look at her, a deep smile spreading across her face as she watched him.

"God, you're so beautiful."

She smiled wickedly and teased the flap of his boxers with his fingers.

He bent back down and kissed between her breasts. He moved to her nipple slowly, running his tongue over it in a vane attempt to make it harder. He sucked it into his mouth and bit it until she moaned, but not enough to hurt her.

His breathing wasn't panting like hers, she needed to fix that. She opened the flap with a moan as the head of his penis greeted her fingers. She thrust her hand in farther and wrapped her hand completely around him, feeling the pre-cum that had already run down him.

"Ah!" He nearly screamed. He nearly bit her nipple in two. The second she had touched him he had stopped breathing. God that felt so good. He pushed into her hand, begging her to move him. Begging her to run her soft hand down the length of him.

She held him in place, increasing her grip on him slowly, then letting it go. He just kept getting harder and she loved it. Maybe he would get the message her hand isn't what he should be inside of.

He grabbed the buttons of her pants and frantically tried to pull them open. He had to play her game. He was at her mercy, but he was shaking too much to get the open. He was reduced to whimpering as her grip became tighter.

"Lois..." He moaned. "Can't-"

She grabbed his hands and he simply whimpered as she pulled away from his throbbing erection. But he busied himself by sucking her breasts again.

She undid her button and tore the zipper down, his hands quickly returning to her hips, assisting her pull her pants off. He grabbed the loop of her panties and pulled them off as well.

"Can't...wait..." She whispered between harsh pants.

She closed her eyes and waited for him, she could feel him straining at her entrance. Why wasn't he going in? She wrapped her legs around his waist and tried hard to getting him in but he remained motionless.

She opened her eyes to see him starring at her, fear somewhat consuming those lust filled eyes. He looked like he was about to faint.

"Clark?" She whispered taking her hands and placing them on his face. "What's wrong?"

He seemed frozen, he wasn't even breathing.

"Clark?" She said worriedly. "Clark!" He fell on her in a heap.

As she tried to lift him up, she saw out of the corner of her eye something run across the yard, then the older him take off after it. She hoped he would catch him, he just had to.

She began searching Clark over, looking for anything that could have made him freeze like that. She found a green dart inserted in his back and quickly pulled it out, throwing it out the window as fast as possible. She ran back over to him and looked at the hole.

It wasn't healing. Oh God. It wasn't healing.

"Clark!" She screamed and shook him, trying desperately to wake him.

She heard the front door burst open and grabbed her shirt, throwing a blanket of Clark.

The older him walked in, another man straining in his arms. He wasn't even putting forth any effort to hold him back, while the other man on the other hand was fighting desperately.

"Caught him." He said angrily as he pushed the man so Lois could see him.

She gasped and made a fist and slugged him with all her might. He fell to the floor unconscious but she didn't care. She kept kicking him until Clark lifted her away, she still fought against his grasp.

"YOU SON OF A B!!!!! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!" She yelled at the still form till her voice gave out. Clark lowered her to the ground carefully and let her go.

Her first instinct was to run to Clark, make sure he was alright. But she couldn't move. She was paralyzed with fear.

"He can't be dead." She whispered to no one in particular. She couldn't see the future him leaning in front of her.

"He's not. He'll be fine in a minute."

She started shaking her head and rocking and he grabbed her arms, forcing her to look up at him. "He'll be awake in a minute. He'll be just fine."

"What happened to him?"

"That dart froze him." He pointed over his shoulder at the unconscious man. "He was hoping Clark was only with you so he could easily take him."

"But he couldn't." She looked up at him with tear filled eyes. "Thanks to you." She wrapped her arms around him and squeezed him for dear life. She heard something fall over and ran to him, putting his head in her lap. She stroked his hair gently, keeping him calm. "You okay Smallville?"

"Yeah. What happened?"

"You were frozen. But everything's ok now."

The older him walked back into the kitchen where he had thrown the body but only found a puddle of liquid in his place.

He didn't see the man around the corner of the house watching through the window. He smiled at the confusion in the house that his clone had created. And he had thousands of more in back up that when they completed their missions, could simply dissolve.

'Genius Luthor, pure genius.'


	22. Normal

Chapter 22: Normal

It had been 2 weeks since he was shot. Lois had been working with Jimmy every chance she could in order to figure out why her house was burned down. Other than that she had been in Metropolis researching what she could.

But as of right now all she could do was sit and stare at that phone. It hadn't rung but 2 times in those 2 weeks and none of the callers had been him. And every time she picked up the phone to call him she would stop short, setting it back down with her doubts clouding her mind.

It was like after that they had almost has sex he didn't want anything to speak to her. Maybe he hated her for leaving like this?

But all she could do was sit in the Talon apartment, the news papers spread around her and the phone in the middle of the chaos.

She had changed the ring tone for Clark's number to Stolen by Dashboard Confessional. She had paid the extra money just to get that one song on her phone.

She never did that, ever.

Maybe she was going nuts? Maybe so.

She couldn't admit she lo-... She lov-...him. She could say it without missing a beat but she hadn't let it sink into her heart until now, with those papers wrapped around her on the floor, cell phone in the middle.

When he was gone she kept saying she loved him, she missed him and that she wanted him to come home to her. But what was that? It didn't feel like she feels now.

That was pain and longing.

This is pure and simple, honest even.

She turned her head suddenly to a knock at the door.

"Just a second!"

She straightened out her shirt and stood. When she opened the door she was looking at the floor.

She was greeted with a pair of black leather shoes, expensive looking black leather shoes. She looked her way up slowly. Black suit pants and a white button up shirt. A lot of muscle to fill those clothes out the way he was.

Finally found his face and her breath was literally taken away. He exuded confidence, a smirk splayed across his gorgeous, full lips. His tongue snuck out in slow motion to wet his already moist looking lips.

His face was Oh-My-God handsome and sun kissed. His cheeks were slightly flustered, bringing a beautiful blush to spread across his amazing high cheek bones. His eyes swallowed her into a field of butterflies the second she looked into them. That striking shade of green almost made them seem blue.

"Wow." She whispered.

His hair was jet black and pulled slightly from his face, but she couldn't pay attention to it for long, his eyes kept drawing her back to them.

"Thanks."

His voice was so deep and sexy it made her shiver. His hand came from behind his back and extended a bouquet of white lilies to her. She starred at them before slowly taking them, making sure to brush his with hers as she did. They smiled lightly at each other.

"So Lois...You going to let me in or do I have to stand here forever?"

She almost dropped the flowers as she recognized the voice. "SMALLVILLE!"

She jumped into his arms and kissed him on the lips.

"I take it you missed me!" He laughed as they pulled apart.

"Almost didn't recognize you there Smallville. Good job." She punched him in the arm as he set her down. "Yes I missed you! Don't ever go that long without calling me ever again!" She winked and turned to walk away. "So why are you all dressed up?"

He grabbed her waist and pulled her up against him, wrapping his arms around her front and swaying them back and forth. He bent down and kissed her neck making her lean into his touch. He breathed in her scent, God how he had missed how good she smells. Every second of everyday he would find something that reminded him of how good she smells.

He kissed her behind her ear and ran his hands slowly across her soft silky arms. She shivered against him and moaned quietly.

He leaned back to her ear and whispered, "I am taking the woman I love out to dinner, then a walk through the park and back home for a surprise."

He took the outer shell of her ear in his mouth and bit it. He purposely let out a moan so that it reverberated through her body.

She gasped against him and turned to face him, an innocent smile playing on his lips. She tucked her arms around his waist and looked into his eyes.

"Why didn't you call?" She asked quietly as she leaned against his chest.

His heart beat was rapid, but soothed out all her nerves. She could memorize that heart beat and easily go to sleep with it in her head. She closed her eyes against him, finally relaxing.

He rested his chin against the top of her head and circled her with his arms. He found himself inhaling her scent yet again. "I wanted to. I just worked so hard I didn't have the energy. I'm so sorry Lois."

She smiled at his sincerity. "I can't believe you've got all you muscles back in so little time. You look amaz-I mean you look like the same nerd you used to."

He smiled. "Was that a compliment from Lois Lane?"

She chuckled. "Never." She leaned back and looked once against into his beautiful eyes. "I realized something while you were gone."

"What?"

"That I'm in lo-" Her throat cut her words short. She smiled and shook it off. 'I can't believe I almost said that!'

His brow furrowed. "What is it Lois?"

"That I should really become a reporter again! Didn't you say we're going on a date? I have nothing to wear!" She started scurrying across the apartment, picking up her papers.

He silently thought she is bi-polar but he knew it was just Lois trying to protect her heart. She didn't want to get hurt again, he knew that. She was afraid to let him in because she knew he could very well leave again. He had to prove to her that she could love him anyway, because he will always come back to her.

He smiled sadly as he watched her, he had caught her almost say I love you. He couldn't contain the butterflies flying rapidly throughout his body. They had left his stomach the second she opened the door and saw her.

"Smallville? You coming?"

She was halfway down the steps and had stopped to wait for him. He shook his head and came running after her.

-

They had ate until they were about to explode. They had walked through the park holding hands until night fell upon them. Now they were in his room, she was sitting on his bed and he was standing looking around, making her nervous.

"So what's this surprise you had for me Smallville?"

"First you have to promise me something." He said as he walked closer to her.

She smiled at him. "Depends."

He leaned down in front of her and took hold of her hand. "Promise me that this time you won't break my heart. Promise me that you won't tell me to leave. Promise me that you at least love me, and that you always will."

She took a deep breath and looked carefully into his eyes. He contained so much fear in those beautiful eyes. She nodded slowly and he broke out in to smile. She lowered her head.

He watched as she never expressed any happiness as she nodded. He put a finger under her chin and lifted her face to meet his. "What's wrong?"

"Can you promise me something?"

He rubbed his thumb across her cheek. "Of course."

She took his face in her hands. "Promise me that you'll never leave me, like all the others have."

He bit his lip as he saw the tears rise in her eyes. "Honey, you have to understand that one of these days Jor-el is going to call me to him. And I will have to leave."

She leaned her forehead against his and shook her head. "No. No you don't have to do anything you don't want to."

"Lois...I won't have a choice."

She dropped a tear down her face. "But you'll leave me."

He caught the tear with his finger and wiped it away. "And I'll come back."

She shook her head. "Then you can't make your promise."

"Lois.."

"No. Clark. I'm not going to get hurt again."

"I know that. I'm never going to hurt you. Ever."

"You'll hurt me if you leave."

"Well you have to look at it this way. If I don't leave Jor-el will be angry. Every time I have disobeyed him he has killed someone I love, or hurt someone I love. Do you want that instead?" He whispered softly.

She searched his eyes. "Your dad. He took Jonathon."

Clark closed his eyes shut. "Yes he did. And I don't want him to take you from me. So I promise you I will come back to you, when I do leave. None of the others did that. I know I'll come back to you. I'll spend everyday wishing I can come back to you, every second."

She smiled. "Pinky swear Smallville?" She brought up her hand and laughed a little.

He wrapped his pinky with hers. "Pinky swear." He pulled a little bow from his pocket and handed it to her.

She looked at it and wiped away her tears. She opened it slowly and gasped at what was inside. "The bracelet. You fixed it."

He smiled. "The older me helped. He's better with his heat vision than I am right now. You like it?"

"I love it Smallville. Put it on me." She held out her arm to him.

He slid it on and it let out a blue glow. He smiled up at her and kissed her lips. She slowly kissed him back and ran her hands around his shoulders.

He picked up her waist and laid her back onto the bed, him slowly crawling over to her.

"Nobody is home but us Smallville."

He kissed her again. "I know."

He dove his tongue into her mouth as their kissing sped up. She bit it in between her teeth and sucked on it with her mouth closed around it. She opened her eyes to him and noticed his still closed. He looked so sexy, sweat starting to form on his face. She let it go and he stuck it in the rest of the way, gliding it across her tongue and circling it.

He leaned his weight down on her and pushed his mouth harder against her mouth, making her kiss him more. He was panting like crazy, he didn't want to breathe. He trailed kisses to her ear and sucked on that spot that made her moan every time.

She grabbed his shirt and ripped it open, desperate to feel those muscles. She ran her hands across his pecks and squeezed them, they're hard as rocks. She ran her thumbs around his nipples until they were just as hard. He bit down on her neck and she whimpered, God that felt good. It sent heat to core, a fire that was quickly building.

He grabbed her shirt with his teeth and ripped it off of her. He looked into her eyes and smiled at her surprise, but she moaned none the less. He kissed his way to her breast and found only skin. He smiled, she's eager. He kissed all the way around it and started to move to the other when he heard her growl. He looked up at her.

"What?"

"Quit teasing me."

He smiled and licked across her nipple, watching the ecstasy spread across her face.

"Oh..." She bit her lip.

He sucked it in his mouth and ran his hand slowly up her side, tickling her skin along the way. When his hand reached her other breast she began panting and pushing into his mouth more. He sucked on her even harder and squeezed her breast with his other hand.

She couldn't think straight, God that felt too good. He was really missing out. She scratched her nails up his back and felt him shiver, so she did it again. From him pressing down on her she could feel his erection on her thigh. She moved her hips up and they both moaned. His mouth left he breast as he gasped.

He was pressed perfectly into her, he could feel her heat, it was burning his skin all over his body. He removed his hand from her breast and slide it down her body. He cupped her heat and pressed in. He could feel how wet she was through her dress pants. He scratched at the spot and she swiveled her hips against his fingers.

He pressed into her harder.

"Claaarrrrkk!" She moaned. She felt her entire body get hot as she tried to push those fingers in more, she couldn't. Her hands left his chest and ran to her pants where she frantically undid them and started pulling them down.

He lifted off of her and pulled them away, looked down at her fully exposed to him.

"What happened to wearing underwear?"

She smiled unzipped his pants. "Right back at you."

His penis fell out of his pants, right onto her heat and his eyes rolled back in his head. The zipper was trying to get caught on his skin. He ripped his pants off of him. He pulled himself back up to her mouth, never bothering to remove himself from her.

She was desperately trying to push him in but he wouldn't let her. He kept moving to the side she was, following her hips until she couldn't take it anymore.

She flipped them over and grabbed his penis in her hand. She put the head at her entrance and rubbed herself on his, coating him more than he was. She smiled and he gasped, open mouthed and loud.

His hands ran up her body and grabbed her breasts, squeezing them, feeling her shiver against him made it worse.

She slid down him in one deep thrust and he let her go, grabbing the pillows and ripping them with his fingers.

"Oh...God Lois..."

His hand ran in between them and rubbed her as she slid down him, making her hand grip his stomach. He leaned up and kissed her as she made her way all the way down him. Their tongues fought each other as she made her way up quickly.

God she was so tight, and hot. He could feel her liquid running down him and he grabbed her hips with his other hand. He had to go faster. This was too slow.

He flipped them back over and grabbed her legs, pulling them securely around his body as he pushed into her hard. She grabbed his arms and pulled herself to him, kissing him in sync with their thrusts.

She could feel him hitting the spot way inside her that had never been touched before and she screamed, gripping him harder. Wanting him to hit it more.

"Harder Clark. Harder!"

She grabbed his butt and forced him to push into her, biting his neck, doing anything she could to feel him hit it again. She ran a desperate hand around him as he pulled back again and grabbed his testicles softly.

He almost completely stopped, pleasure shot through every vein. He was on Red-K he knew it. He pushed himself into her harder and she continued to grip his balls, rolling them around softly, massaging him senseless.

"Loissss..." He whimpered helplessly.

"Hurry Clark!" She whispered as he pulled back. She could feel it so close she was shaking. She needed him to go faster because she couldn't. It was impossible.

She tried pushing against him harder, he could feel it. He felt the pressure inside him building a doubled rate. She was milking him like she had super strength. God it was amazing. He was pushing up into her spot, trying to get her there before him, he knew he was about to lose all senses.

She breath caught in her throat and she pushed into him one last time, falling back onto the mattress, her heat lifted up, her muscles gripping him widely.

"CLARK!"

He gulped as he felt her grip him like that. He opened his eyes as he felt her heat break open around him. With one last pull he was gone. He spewed inside her, burying himself into her heat.

"LOIS!"

He could feel both liquids wrap around him as he pumped himself dry.

He leaned down on her slowly. His breath running faster than it ever had before. He loved the feeling of being in her.

She looked up at him and stroked his face, kissing him deeply as they tried to catch their breaths.

"Tha...That was...the best...ever!" She whispered.

He smiled at her. "Same...same here..."

He moved to pull out of her and she pulled him in more. He looked down at her as she lazily smiled and gripped him one last time.

He rolled them over, she laid on his chest. She ran her hand behind her and pulled him out slowly. Giving him a small tap before saying. "Good job Clark Jr."

She kissed him on the lips. "Good night Clark."

She nudged her butt against him again and smiled as she slowly fell asleep.

He gripped her tighter as she did, Jr. coming out to play again. But he knew she had to rest. He kissed her one last time none the less before she drifted too far away.

He was proud this day had been normal. Normal? No. It had been extraordinary. More than anything he had wished for.


	23. 2017 Versions

Chapter 23: 2017 Versions

He held the picture in his hand and caressed the smiling face with his thumb. She looked so beautiful in that picture. She was standing against the sunset, her brown hair blowing ever so slightly around her face. Her face had a large smile spread across it as she set her hands on her stomach.

She's 2 month pregnant in this picture. It was taken the day before he left by Jimmy. A goodbye present for now.

He bent his head down and kissed it before sticking it back in the breast pocket of his shirt. He looked down at his watch and saw that it was striking midnight.

He had been away from her for 2 weeks, 3 days and 6 hours. He could even give you the seconds if you asked, and that broke his heart.

He had to leave her twice since they got married and he swore to her he would never do it again. Not while she has so much to deal with in her life.

He heard the younger him say the words that Lois Lane would never forget:

"...And I don't want him to take you from me. So I promise you I will come back to you, when I do leave. None of the others did that. I know I'll come back to you. I'll spend everyday wishing I can come back to you, every second."

He smiled. That promise changes a bit when he gets older. It'll be less rehearsed and more heart felt.

He stood and floated slowly to the window as he saw the blue glow radiate from the house. He knew he needed to leave. He flew to the fortress and landed softly in the snow. It hadn't changed much. He walked in and looked around. The inside was exactly the same.

"Who are you?" Jor-el boomed.

He looked at the consol and smiled as it began to glow. He pressed in 3 different crystals and a blue, yellow and red glow shot out of it.

"How do you know the House of El's sequence?"

"I am Kal-el of Krypton from the year 2017."

"You had already turned back time once. How is it that you exist in the year 2007?"

"The Kal-el of this year is in grave danger and you know this. You sent me here to help him become a man who can overcome his fears and fight to stay alive. One that will become the man that will protect this world."

"You have completed your training?"

"Yes."

"Good. Why are you here now?"

"I wish to speak with my wife."

"Lois Lane?"

He smiled. "You always knew didn't you?"

"From the second she landed here in the plane crash I knew she was the one meant for you."

"Can I speak with her? I know there is a way."

"I will locate her in a moment."

The fortress went dead and Clark waited patiently. The second it came back to life a light flooded throughout the fortress and the consol opened up. She stepped out of it not as a hologram but as the real her. She looked up at him and smiled after straightening her clothes.

"You do know it's 12:30 A.M. don't you Smallville?" She wrapped her arms around him and gave him a kiss.

"I've missed you so much Lois."

"And I've missed you. How is everything going here?"

"We just got back from our first date." He looked at her seductively and she sighed happily.

"I remember that night. Best night EVER!"

He leaned in and kissed her again. "Yes. Yes it was."

"Have you done everything here yet?"

"No. He hasn't flown yet. And I don't remember the first time that I did."

"I do."

She whispered in his ear and he smiled. "That would be the reason I don't remember."

"Well the explosion did knock out 4 sq miles." She grabbed his hand and started to walk around. "Are we cute together? I mean here."

"You want to go see them?"

She turned and looked at him shocked. "They're having sex Clark. And plus with another person on me, I'm not sure I should fly."

"We can wait until morning to go see them. I don't want to interrupt their moment. And we don't have to fly. I have the key, we can walk."

"You really want me to see myself with blonde hair don't you?"

"Makes you realize why you like brown so much." He played with the ring the glistened on her finger. He worked so hard to pick out the right one. "You'll have to take it off and act like you hate me."

"Don't forget I have to cover up my little bump."

She grabbed his hand and set it on her stomach.

He leaned down and kissed her belly. "Hey there little girl."

"Little boy." She corrected.

"Have you gone for an ultrasound yet?"

"Nope. I'm waiting for you to come home."

He looked up at her. "Lois..."

"Clark. This is our first baby. You need to be there."

"But what about the baby's health Lois?"

"I can still go to the doctors appointments. But I'm not going to get an ultrasound without you ok?"

He smiled. "Ok."

"Now. I have to go home and get some clothes. Are you coming with me?"

He shook his head sadly. "I can't leave until this is over. I wish I could though."

She kissed him. "I love you."

"Love you too."

She stepped back through the portal and winked at him. She would be back in the morning.

When she stepped though the portal again she was carrying 2 small duffle bags in her hands. He took them both from her and helped her out.

"How are you feeling?"

"Nervous and excited. Damn mood swings."

He laughed and grabbed her hands. "I love you."

She smiled. "Love you too. I can't seem to say that enough now days." She looked down at her left arm. "I had to pry the ring off of my finger. Lucy promised she wouldn't lose it this time."

"What about the bracelet?"

She looked down at her arm and rolled up her sleeve. "Still infused with my skin."

"At least you were able to cover it up with makeup and it doesn't bulge out."

"For now." She pushed her sleeve down and kissed him again. "I'm not going to be able to touch you today other than a few smacks."

"I remember."

"This will be fun!" She rolled her eyes and kissed him again.

They walked through the light and out of the caves. They slowly separated as they walked but couldn't get used to the fact that they couldn't touch each other.

"Here goes nothing." She whispered to him. "Give me my damn bag Smallville! I can carry it on my own!" She shouted and grabbed the bag from him. She continued to stomp up the driveway, Clark slightly running after her.

"Lois!"

"Don't 'Lois' me!" She almost smiled as she saw her younger self walk out the front door pulling Clark by the hand.

She stopped and threw her back behind her, smacking Clark across the chest. "I thought you wanted to carry it."

"Changed my mind. Move it Smallville. Haven't got all day." She ran up the steps and looked at the couple in front of her.

Lois stepped forward and looked her over. "Are you me?"

"Yes." Clark stumbled up the steps behind her and she turned. "You are such a loser sometimes."

"Oh forgive me Miss Lois. We can't all be as perfect as you."

"Damn straight." She turned and looked at the younger Clark who looked frightened. "Jeeze, lighten up! I don't have kryptonite on me!" She moved around them and walked through the front door. "FOOD!! Come on Smallville! Put that crap down and eat!"

He walked in after her but stopped at the door to listen to the younger people.

"Future you is kind of..."

"Bossy? I like her!"

"Lois..." He grumbled.

"What? You heard her! Come and eat."

After a lunch of awkward silence and occasional glanes Clark and the older Lois had cleaned up and started washing the dishes.

"You know that I hate awkward silences so spill."

"Spill what?" He whispered.

She rolled her eyes and sat down the dishes. "Whatever it is that is bothering you about me."

"What happened to you and him?" He pointed out the window as he blurted it out.

"You know that I can't give you that answer. You have to live it yourself."

"But I don't think I can wait. I love her so much it hurts. Does she love me? Do we break each others hearts?" He looked at her with tear filled eyes.

She starred at him for a second then motioned for him to sit down at the table. She somehow called the older Clark in from outside. She looked up at him and he nodded before walking back out.

She turned back to him and rolled up her sleeve. He gasped as he saw the imprint of the bracelet as a white brand on her tanned skin. He took her hand in his hands and touched it. It felt silky smooth.

"What happened to it?"

She sighed. "I have no idea. And neither does anyone else. I woke up one morning to take a shower and it faded into my skin."

He rubbed over the jewel again. "Does it hurt?"

"Never has."

He continued to look over it. "Why did you show me this?"

She stood and headed for the door. "To make you think." She walked out as he sat dumbfounded at the table.

What happened to their relationship? Were they together or separated?

What killed him the most was that he wasn't able to find out.

He turned his head and watched as the younger Lois walked down clad only in a red bikini. He gulped. She walked over to him, her bracelet shining from the sun. She kissed him on the lips.

"So...did you have fun last night Smallville?" She straddled him in the chair.

"Um...yeah..." She did a small bounce on his lap and he moaned. He grabbed her hips and held her to him. "What are you doing?" He whispered hoarsely. "They could walk in any minute."

She leaned in and kissed his neck, sucking on the skin. She drew her tongue up to his ear. "They know what's happening." She pressed her chest into his and ground her hips against him. He groaned into her ear. "Good boy."

She jumped up and ran out the door before whispering. "Come find me."

He couldn't me. If he stood there would be a fair amount of paralyzing pain in his legs if he stood. He waited and calmed himself down enough to move. He went out the door and tuned into her heart beat with a smile. He could pick hers out over everyone else's.

He ran through the woods following the beats and ended up at Crater Lake.

"Lois?"

He walked out to the pier.

"Lois?"

He saw a few bubbles pop out of the water and smiled. He backed up to the sand in front of the water and waited as the bubbles became more frequent. When her head broke the surface he started to step forward but noticed she was still moving.

She swam her way up to the rocks then walked her way up, slowly revealing her naked skin to him.

His mouth suddenly went dry and gaped open at the sight of her wet naked breasts coming out of the water. "Lois..."

"Shh." She whispered. She continued slowly out until she stood butt naked in front of him. She turned around slowly to give him the full view then looked into his eyes. He was devouring her every second. She loved it. She walked up to him, put a finger on his chest and walked around him. She squeezed his butt, making him jump then faced him again.

"You like me all wet Clark?" She whispered as she let her hands rest on his chest.

He simply gulped and nodded, finding that he no longer knew how to speak. He tried his best to look at her face but his eyes kept drifting down.

She put a finger under his chin and lifted up. "No peeking. Close your eyes."

He shook his head. "Lois... I don't-"

His words were cut short as she bent down and kissed him through his pants. He couldn't think straight.

She put a hand on his and pressed in, drawing circles around the bulge. Smiling as his hips followed her fingers.

"Close your eyes." She whispered seductively. She then gripped him, forcing him to close his eyes.

She grabbed his limp hands and stuck one of his fingers into her mouth, slowly sucking it in and licking causing a few whimpers to escape his mouth. Then she placed his hands on her stomach.

"You can move your hands if you want to."

He debated going down but he didn't want to seem too desperate for her. He ran his hands up her stomach slowly, amazed at the abs he could feel on her. He cupped her breasts, kneaded them, her nipples in between his fingers. She pushed into him, breaking a smile onto his face.

Then suddenly she grabbed his hands and placed them at his sides, yet another whimper escaped him.

"Get naked." He heard her step back. "You can open your eyes now."

He opened his eyes slowly to take in the sight of her. Her nipples were hard as rocks; the pebbled flesh was blood red. He inhaled deeply and picked up a faint scent that intrigued him. Her arousal. He met her eyes and then quickly drifted down to the source of the scent. He saw all he needed to quickly grabbed his own clothes and tear them off in front of her. He undid his pants quickly, and then pulled his shirt off over his head. He pushed his boxers off then settled an awkward hand over his erection.

She smiled as his shyness then took the hand away. She looked at his engorged member and lost her breath. She couldn't believe the size, that she was able to get that in her. She's so lucky. She placed his hand on her upper thigh, right beside the place she needed him most right now.

His breathing picked up a few notches; he could feel her heat on his hand.

"Tell me something you have never done before."

"What?"

"Tell me something sexual that you have never done to a girl before."

His eyes left his hand and met her eyes; from there he turned blood red.

"Ok. I'll go first. I've never give head. But..." She stepped forward and knelt down onto her knees. She licked the head of him where she saw the clear liquid oozing out. He growled furiously at the feeling making her proud. "I want to try for you."

He nodded wide eyed as he watched the most erotic thing he had ever seen.

She took a little in her mouth and sucked, looking up at him to make sure she was doing it right. She knew from her friends what guys didn't like but different guys have different likes.

His eyes rolled back in his head at the sensation and he gripped her shoulders.

She took more of him in and relaxed her throat, sucking in her cheeks for better suction. She ran the tip of her tongue around his head and he entangled one of his hands into her hair. She stopped for a second and readied herself for him to slide all the way in. She grabbed his thighs and pulled him in. She had the urge to puke seconds later and slowly slid him back out.

She looked up at his face and smiled, it conveyed pure bliss and ecstasy.

He looked down at her with a lazy smile and whispered. "Don't...stop...so...good..."

She slowly pulled him back in and sucked a little, pushing her tongue along this vein to the roof of her mouth. He touched her lips with the hilt and moaned. She began pulling him out again but this time she sucked a little harder as he pulled out. She could taste another round of his pre-cum, a salty taste she already loved.

She began to move faster, much to his pleasure, and found that it was easier to move that way.

He was panting crazily, loving the feeling and enjoying the sight. He wanted so badly to push into her to hurry the process but didn't because he knew he would choke her. His knees almost gave out on him as he found the tightening in his body about to break.

'Would she? Do I need to stop her?' "Lois..." he groaned out and grabbed her shoulders to stop her. "I'm...going to-"

She ran a hand away from his thigh and grabbed his sac carefully. She moaned and he whimpered. She massaged him slowly then sucked one last time and he burst into her mouth with a scream of her name. She swallowed every bit and pulled him out, licking him clean afterwards.

He fell into a laying position on the ground. She crawled up on to him and smiled at him. He looked up at her after a second and laughed.

"You have a little on your lip."

Her tongue came out and licked it away. "I love the way you taste."

He smiled thankfully at her. "That felt so good Lois."

She rubbed her leg against his groin. "So what have you not done Smallville? I'm not taking two turns."

He turned red again. "Um...I've never...um...tasted..." He mumbled out.

"A girl? Well that's simple enough."

He grabbed her hands as she rolled off of him. "Is it weird to want to?"

She smiled affectionately at him. "Clark. Guys do that all the time. I promise it's normal." She laid down beside him and he sat up. "Do you just want a taste or more?"

"More..." He breathed out as he took in her frontal nudity.

"Please me Smallville. I'm waiting."

He knelt down between her legs and looked down at her fleshy area. "What do I do?"

She set up and looked at him. "You could always do something else."

"No!" He put his hands on her stomach and pushed her back down. "I'll do it. I want to." He leaned down and smelled her again. He loves that smell. He awkwardly stuck out his tongue and thought against it at the last second. "Um..."

"Oh for God's sake." She grabbed his hand and raked his finger across her with a moan then stuck the finger in his gawking mouth.

She tasted sweet, but it was a kind of sweet he had never experienced before. He quickly leaned down again as the taste threatened to disappear. Then he took a wary lick. She moaned and grabbed his hair pulling his face into her.

'She liked it.' He stuck his tongue out completely and made a long torturous lick through the slit. She pushed herself into him again but this time he placed a hand on her stomach to hold her still. He flattened his tongue against and let the tip slide into her core. She started fighting his hand for it again. He stopped and went back down, curiously sliding part of his tongue in her to receive a guttural moan. He pushed his tongue in more then swirled it around before pulling out.

"What are you doing?" She rasped at him.

He leaned over o her face with lust filled eyes and hungrily attacked her mouth. He had only promised a taste. He had tasted her but knew he couldn't reach her spots with his tongue.

He feverishly bit her lips and ran his tongue over hers. He ran a hand down her body and positioned himself at her entrance. He looked down at her for permission.

"I...thought...you were...tasting..."

He kissed her again. "Can't...anymore...need...you...need in...you..."

He raked himself across her and she bucked into him pulling his head in. He released his hand then pushed avidly into her, pulling out just as quickly. He leaned up on his forearms and changed his angle of penetration.

"CLARK!"

Her legs swung up around his hips and pushed into him, pulling him in at a bruising force. They pushed against each other perfectly timed. Her walls quickly started milking him faster than before.

He leaned down and sloppily kissed her, moaning into her mouth as her hands started running up and down his body. He took advantage of her inability to kiss him back to leave his mark on her neck, shoulder and more carefully on her breast.

"Oh God..." She moaned. "Clark...I'm going-" She screamed at the top of her lungs before her sentence was finished. He quickly moved his mouth back to hers to quiet her.

It didn't last long on his end as her muscles fluttered around him, drawing him cascading over the edge.

"LOIS!" He spilled his seed into her.

As his breathing calmed down he laid down on her, smiling crazily.

"I love you." She whispered into his hair.

"I love you more..."

She smacked him. "Nope. It's pretty equal." She kissed the top of his head.

-

They had come back hours ago, goofy smiled present and simple touches noticeable. The older versions watched them in awe. They both remembered those moments but it was something completely different to watch them. They wanted to kiss just as badly. They wanted to touch but they held back. They can't know. They have to find this on their own.

The older Clark watched them at the table. He remembered holding hands with Lois under the table and smiled. He turned and looked at his Lois, who was quickly turning pale.

"Lo? You ok?" He put a hand on her back.

"Sick.' She gurgled out. She whimpered and tried to stand.

Clark put his arm around her waist, his other under her legs and ran her up the stairs. He had done this every night at dinner, the only time she ever got sick.

He heard footsteps behind him as the young couple came to watch.

"Is she ok?" Lois whispered worriedly.

Clark lifted the toilet seat with his foot and sat her on the floor. He then pulled her hair out of her face. She leaned in and let everything go, finding comfort in him rubbing her back softly as she did so.

"She's just sick. She'll be fine."

"Are you sure? Should we call a doctor?"

Clark looked at his younger part as his memories came to the forefront of his mind. The younger him wants to x-ray her. His younger half finally looked at him after debating the ethical thing.

"Clark could you take her back to the table? I can handle this."

Clark nodded and picked her up. "Time to go Lois."

"PUT ME DOWN!" She screamed as they walked down the hall.

Clark blew the door shut and super sped to lock it. She finished a few seconds later.

He handed her a wet cloth then she wiped off her face. She looked up at him.

"Sorry about that."

He sat down beside her. "Sorry about what?"

"Making you kick them out so he wouldn't know. I hate keeping this from them."

He reached up and flushed the commode then wrapped his arms around her. "I know. So do I."

"Clark asked me something while we did the dishes."

"I know. And it scared the hell outta me."

She turned in his arms and looked up at him. "Then afterwards you remember what happened?"

He smiled. "On the beach."

"You remember how nervous you were?"

"Every second."

He leaned in to kiss her but stopped halfway. "We should probably get back downstairs."

He stood and helped her up. "Thanks for the help Smallville."

He smiled even wider at the sound of his nickname. "No problem."

She walked out the door and down the steps. She cautiously peeped around the corner suppressing a laugh. "Ahem." The sound of a broken kiss ricocheted through the house. "Shouldn't we finish dinner?" She looked back up at Clark and rolled her eyes the murmured. "Love you."

"Love you too."


	24. Holding The Truth

Chapter 24: Holding the Truth

It was breaking her heart every second she couldn't touch him, kiss him or tell him she loves him. She looked over at the younger him and saw him starring at her. He quickly looked away.

"Sorry. It's just you look like you have a lot on your mind."

"I do. A lot more than you would think."

He carefully turned back to her. "Do you want to talk about it?"

She shook her head. "I forgot about the guilty-forever complex you used to have. But no. I can't talk about it."

"Oh."

He continued to watch her as she quietly watched the sunset, an absentminded hand came up to scratch her belly. He mistook it for her getting sick again.

"Are you still queasy?"

She looked at him and then at her hand. She quickly jerked it away. "A little but it's passing." She lied.

"How did he know what to do?"

"You ask too many questions."

"I'm sorry." He whispered bashfully.

She looked back at him. "How does the sunset feel?"

He looked up. "Same as usual." He said offhandedly.

"You're wrong." She whispered.

His head shot up and took in the sunset once again. It looked the same as normal. But when he looked back to her he could tell it had changed.

"Every sunset is different. Every flicker of flame represents another moment in a life. The intensity you feed from goes from strong to weak depending on your mood. Right now the sunset is cloud free, open to any color the night dares bring out of it. You know why?" She looked at him with a piercing stare. "Because you fear what you don't know but you rejoice what you feel You absorb more of the sun in time you think than when you use physical force."

The sunset had ended as she finished her sentence.

"And the darkness of the night is to the death of the ones we love. Also to those who believe life should be simple with no layers. Nothing exciting. But safe." He cocked his brow at her. "We can't live it safe."

"Lois? Is everything ok?" He asked worriedly.

"Not all words can be spoken but all emotions can be felt. Amazing isn't it?"

He leaned towards her. "You're scarring me."

"I scarred you from the second you saw me and didn't see the bracelet outlined through my shirt." She didn't smirk, she didn't laugh; she simply waited by looking at the stars.

"I love her." Was all he said for a few minutes. But she waited, she knew he had more to say. "Not seeing the bracelet meant some where along the way we lost each other. It hurts to think that I'd ever lose you-her."

"You're reading too much into what you don't know."

"I can't help it. I need to know."

"Oh yes. Let me tell you every detail and ruin the surprise of how your life turns out so that you can dread every waking moment. I'll do that. All you need to know is that we are perfectly happy when we get older."

"What about Lex and Lionel? My mom and Lana even? What happens to them?"

Her mood darkened. "A lot of pain. For everyone."

They heard the door swing open behind them and the older Clark stepped out.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

"Would you leave me alone for once Smallville? God. You are so annoying."

He simply smiled. 'Mood swings.' "Just asking."

She stood and walked back into the house, slamming the door in her wake. He sat down beside his younger self.

"I missed the sunset."

"Yeah." He stood and walked away.

"What's his problem?"

Clark turned and looked at the younger Lois that had managed to sneak up on him.

"He's scarred."

"Oh really?" She sat down beside him trying to ignore the chills that shot up her spine as her thigh brushed his. "Why?"

"He's worried that you two won't end up together."

"Why is he planning that far ahead? We have our whole lives to figure that out."

Clark sighed. "His nightmares aren't only about what happened to him in that room Lois. It's all the scenarios he could go through with you. He loves you so much and just the thought of losing you tears him apart."

She watched him as he spoke. "You said you are married and your wife is expecting."

"I did."

"What about me? There's no weeding ring on my finger like you said there was."

"She took it off because his initials are on it. You would have figured out who it is."

"Why are you so different from him?" She asked suddenly.

"What do you mean?"

"More bumbling than brooding and more confident than farm-boy shy. What happened in 10 years time?"

"Life changed. I lost a lot and gained so much more. Everything has shaped the person I am now. Even you shaped me."

"Me? What did I do?"

"You showed me that I wasn't meant to be a farm boy, brooding his life away. You gave me faith and confidence. You made me stand out and feel like I could pursue my dreams. You told me that no matter how lonely I felt, I am never truly alone."

-

He walked back in and saw her eating, again. Chocolate wrappers were scattered on the table.

"Hungry Lo?"

"No. I'm working on my bulimia." She rolled her eyes then smiled at him.

He sat down on the table in front of her and picked up her feet. He carefully took off her shoes then socks before pressing his thumb in circles on the bottom of her foot. She visibly relaxed.

"You never told me where you became a masseuse."

"I have to have some secrets." He set down that foot and picked up the other. "Besides, my wife loves this."

She smiled and leaned back. "She's so lucky. With the way you work your hands, you two must have mind blowing sex."

He smiled at her. "That we do. But not so much lately seeing as she is pregnant."

She looked at him through droopy lids. "Do you remember the night you found out she was pregnant?"

"I'll never forget. She came running out of the bathroom; test in hand, tears covering her face. She ran and jumped on top of me, kissing me as fast as she could. I asked her why she was so happy and she whispered in my ear: 'All our dreams are coming true!! I'm pregnant Smallville!' I don't remember ever being so happy in my life."

"And then the next day at work you were so nervous because she kept running off and you couldn't find her."

He set down her foot as he shook his head. "You want me to get your back?"

She quickly flipped over and started taking off her shirt when the younger couple walked in. They were caught in a compromising position, with her tearing her shirt off and him kneeling behind her.

"Wow. Sex on the couch."

They both looked up. The older Lois smiled. "Not even close."

She threw her shirt in the floor and the older Clark proceeded to run his hands up her back. Younger Clark just watch, his grip tightening on her hand. Lois looked up at him and patted his arm.

He didn't relax any.

"What are you doing then?" The younger Lois asked.

The older Lois mumbled something and the older Clark smiled. "Getting a back massage."

Clark stepped in. "Why?"

"She needed one." He answered simply as she moaned in content.

Clark watched them carefully. His heart breaking as he watched them. They are clearly still in love but married to other people.

Why are they doing this to themselves?

He looked down at Lois and knew she was thinking something similar judging by the look on her face. Those two were in their own world as were they.

Clark dropped her hand and opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out of his mouth. He turned back to Lois and noticed she hadn't moved either.

He ran out of the house and slammed his fists on the ground; sending it rolling around him as he screamed out his anguish. The older him ran out and grabbed him, only to be thrown through the house.

Both women screamed as they watched him fly through the wall. The older Lois ran over to help him but he threw his hand up in the air. She halted on the spot and watched as he stood, walking out the same hole he had created.

The younger Lois ran out to him, standing at a safe distance as the older him grabbed him and picked him up only to be slammed onto the ground.

"How dare you give up on her?" He screamed as he threw a punch into his face. "You still love her." He said as he stood back away from him.

"Clark." Lois said warningly.

"NO!" He roared. He pushed his older half. "I would have never given up on her. EVER!"

"You didn't!" He yelled back.

"Liar!"

"What would I gain from lying to myself?"

"I don't know! Maybe it's apart of some sick, twisted plan of yours! I don't know!"

The older him stepped forward. "Why would you think that?"

"What are you hiding from us?"

"What?"

"You and Lois are hiding something from us. I heard you talking! What is it?"

Older Lois stepped forward. "Clark, calm down."

"We're not hiding anything dangerous."

"I don't believe you. Lois. Help me." He looked at her and watched as she took the other side.

"Clark maybe they're right."

"I thought you love me?"

"Smallville! Of course I love you! What is wrong with you? Why would you say that?"

"Why are you taking their side?"

"Because they are us! Why can't you see that?"

"He is not me!"

The older Clark looked at him. "What are you talking about? Why wouldn't I be you?"

"You're different."

"Well duh he is! He's older!"

The older Lois walked forward and grabbed the younger Clark's arms. He looked down at her. "What are you so afraid of?" She whispered to him.

"I love her."

Then it clicked in her mind. "She's not going to turn on you like Lana did Clark." Tears formed in his eyes as he looked away.

The younger Lois walked over. "No matter what your dreams show you..." She put a hand on his face and he looked at her. "No matter what you think will happen to us, I will never leave you. No matter what." She kissed his lips. "I know you are having a hard time and considering everything you have been through these past two years, I know it's going to be hard for you to trust again. But you have to believe that I would never hurt you Clark. You brood enough as is."

He smiled down at her.

She kissed his lips again. "I love you Clark Joseph Kent. I love you."

He looked at her as her words soaked in. A smile crept across his full lips. "I love you too."

-

She sat down on the bed beside him on the floor. She watched as he did sit ups, whispering the number every time his face touched his knees.

"78." She whispered with a smile. His eyes looked at her confused as he kept going. He almost missed his number. She smiled as she kept on. "49, 62, 103, 746, 888, 1, 17, 23..."

"Can't count when you do that." He said effortlessly.

"Really? I had no idea." She smiled down at him, her head going from side to side as she watched him. She sat up on the bed as a plan popped into her head. He lay out to come back up and she jumped, straddling his chest.

"What are you doing Lois?"

"Continue on. Don't let me distract you."

"You can do pushups with me, how's that?"

"Sounds good."

He lifted her up and turned over allowing her to lie out on his back. She tickled him ever so often, nearly making him fall, and he would push up too hard and she would scream. Her hands would wrap tighter around his chest as he smiled.

The older couple backed away from the door and quietly went down the stairs.

"I remember when it used to be like that." She whispered to him as he held her in his arms.

"I remember when there was no interruptions, just us. You and me." He whispered against her head.

She fought back a tear. "Don't you wish we could just tell them?"

"Every second, but then I think about us now." He looked down at her. "I don't want it to change. We're too happy the way we are."

"If we had known back then, so much stuff could have been avoided."

"I know. But Jor-el said that we have to face it. That we can't change anything unless we have to."

She turned and looked up at him. "I have to go home soon don't I?"

"I'm afraid so."

"I don't want to go home without you again."

He shook his head. "Sh...they could be listening."

"Clark..."

"Lois I am sorry. I wish I didn't have to be here to but we promised." She opened her mouth again. "We promised Lois."

She bit her lip and turned, looking out the door as t he tears started to fall. She put her hand on her stomach and rubbed in a small circle.

He walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her. "They found Lionel this morning Lois."

"I know I read it in the paper. I still can't believe he was killed. Did you ever figure out who did it?"

"I can only imagine that it was Lex. But we don't have the evidence."

"We could you know. We could get the evidence."

"No. Some things are better left unknown."

"What about your mom and Lana?"

"Their days are numbered. I wish I could change that."

"But you aren't going to."

"No."

"I would. Because I'm sick of waiting and worrying."

"Like you do with me?" He said solemnly.

"Yes and with everyone else. I know love and peace are a big stretch but why not for one night?"

"Because in that one night they could devise something that could kill us all. And then the break wouldn't be worth it."

She kissed his arm. "That's why I love Superman."

"We all know."

"Except them."

He sighed. "Except them."


	25. The Calm before the Storm

Chapter 25: The Calm Before the Storm

He turned over in his restlessness and opened his eyes to the pitch dark room. He expected to find her warmth curled into him but instead he found the emptiness of the bed sheets. He sat up worriedly then sighed in relief as he found her to be standing by the window.

"Lois?" He whispered. "Is everything ok?"

She crossed her arms over her chest. "No."

His brow furrowed as he walked up to her; stretching his muscles and adjusting his boxers as he moved. He walked up behind her, carefully placing a hand on her shoulder. She grabbed his hand and pulled him to her.

"The calm before the storm." She whispered.

He looked out the window and watched the stillness of the night. The trees didn't attempt to sway and the grass remained idle.

"Are you afraid?" She asked him, seemingly drawn to the picture outside.

"With you by my side? No."

"I won't be there Clark." She turned in his arms and faced him. "And the closer that day gets the more I remember what Jor-el said that day."

He grabbed her shoulders. "I'm not going to let you or mom get hurt."

"But you don't know what's going to happen! You don't know for sure!"

"But I do know with all my heart, all my power, that I won't let you get hurt."

She looked into his eyes. "I don't want you to be with me every second. If there is somewhere else you need to be you need to go. The world is more important than me."

"Lois...please don't say that."

"It's the truth! You can't let hundreds die because of one person!"

"I can't let you die!"

"I can't live forever! I'm human Clark. I'm not invincible like you!"

He looked at her curiously. "What's going on? Lois?"

"What Jor-el said will happen. It always does. Please heed his warnings this time Clark. Stop worrying about me and us and get back to training ok?"

He stepped back away from her and observed her for a moment before whispering. "So that's it? You're breaking up with me?"

"No. We need to slow down and get focused on the task at hand. Before it's too late."

"Lois?" She turned back to the window without acknowledging him. "Lois." He raised his voice to her but she still won't answer him. He sighed defeated. "I'll train harder ok? I'll get stronger and hone my abilities."

"And let me do what I need to do."

"What will you be doing?"

"Working on throwing Lex, Lionel and Lana in jail."

"Lois, I don't want you tangled up in that web."

"I was tangled in it the second I met you! You don't want me to go because they're ruthless? You think I don't know that already? I know what they are Clark. I also know that I have to do something. I can't just sit her and think about what they did to you without doing something about it anymore."

She started shaking. He turned her around and noticed the tears streaked down her face.

"Hey." He whispered concerned. She let out a sob and he pulled her in.

"I see your nightmares Clark." She mumbled. "I know what you are thinking at night.: She wiped off the rest of her tears and looked at him. "And I don't want them to come true. So you need to train. Got it?"

He smiled at her. "Yes ma'am."

"Good. Now about those wet dreams..."

He turned red. "Woops."

"Damn straight! I hate doggy style."

She kissed him then climbed into bed, him hot on her trail.

-

They sat down at the table that morning and an eerie quiet filled the room. No one was eating but the older Lois and she was jamming food in her face as fast as she could.

They all turned suddenly as the front door came open and Martha stepped through the door.

"Another guest?" She inquired towards the older Lois.

"Mom! I missed you!"

She jumped up and wrapped her arms around her, nearly crying as she held her.

"Lois?" She asked.

"Yeah?"

"Why did you call me Mom?'

She grinned up at her. "Force of habit. Sorry if I scarred you there."

"It's ok sweetie. Turn around. Let me look at you."

Lois spun and then faced her again. Martha gave her a once over then stopped at her stomach, quickly pulling her up the stairs into the bathroom.

The older Clark fidgeted as he wanted to go up with her. He listened instead.

"Are you wanting to tell me something Lois? Possibly about your expanding waist line?"

She giggled. "Well you see..." she whispered in her ear, "I'm pregnant." She stepped back and smiled.

Martha looked at her confused. "Why did you whisper that?"

"They can't know."

"Who?"

"The one's from now. They can't know."

"Why-wait. It's-"

She nodded. "Yep!"

"Oh My God! Really?"

"Yep. I never got to tell you before-" Her eyes widened as she cut herself off.

Martha quickly shook it off. "I already know it's getting close Lois."

Lois' eyes watered. "I'm leaving tonight Mom. You won't get to see it."

"I don't need to see her in order to love her."

"Him." She said with a smile. "I want it to look just like him, be just like his mother raised him."

"I'm sure he will be baby." Martha bent down and kissed her belly. "Love you in there."

Lois hugged her. "I love you and I am so sorry for everything."

They walked out of the bathroom and back into the kitchen. Lois looked at Clark and smiled at him as she sat down. He let out a sigh of relief and started eating.

The younger couple looked at each other curiously. Neither of them could figure out the secret and they were starting to get anxious as to what it was.

Clark reached under the table and grabbed Lois' hand to give it a reassuring squeeze before he started his meal.

"So Mom, how was Metropolis?"

"Same as usual. Too many politics but there weren't as many crimes."

The older Clark slowed his eating.

"Some one said a man in primary colors is playing hero in the city. Any body else heard anything about it?"

Lois took her turn to butt in. "It's all over the headlines of the Planet. People say he's an Adonis in spandex."

The older Lois chocked on her food and Clark got up to help her.

"Sorry." She mumbled out as she started turning pale. She continued to cough as Clark patted her on the back.

He saw it wasn't working and pulled her chair out, lifting her to her feet. He found the middle of her ribcage with his fist and was about to push in when-

"NO!" Was screamed by the older Clark and Martha.

He looked at them shocked as they hurried around the table. "She's chocking!"

"You don't need to do that." Older Clark stated. "I'll get it." He lifted Lois then put her back into her chair. He put his lips to her and blew a little, pushing the food down.

She regained color quickly as he pulled away. She smiled at him and whispered a thank you. She starred into his eyes for another moment and Martha cleared her throat.

They broke apart quickly, an embarrassing red flooding their faces.

"Nice lung capacity there Smallville." She said as she coughed once more.

"Thanks."

"Right. So I'm going to go eat in the living room."

"I'll go outside."

They grabbed their plates and shot in different directions. Martha attempted to grab her plate when Clark noticed her.

"Where are you going?"

She smiled sheepishly at them. "Oh...no where." She sat back down and looked at her plate. 'This is going to be a long couple of hours.'

-

They all stood on the porch and watched as she walked down the gravel road alone back to the caves.

She didn't want Clark to go with her. That was too obvious. But it hurt so badly when he came in the room to tell him no. That look in his eyes has brought the tears that now run from hers. She held them in until she had stepped through the portal and landed safely on her bed.

Jimmy stood patiently above her as she let it all out into her pillow and he couldn't stand to watch anymore.

Lois Lane was not strong without Clark Kent. She couldn't pretend to be strong anymore. She was too worried about him.

-

The stench of his death still filled the room. A mask was required unless you wanted to lose everything you had for the last month. His blood could still been seen permanently stained to the cold cement floor.

To the investigators it looked like an accident or suicide. None of the incubators were left in the room so there was no evidence that Lex had done it. But who expected any less from a Luthor?

She made notes of the size of the room, the number of outlets, the amount of blood on the floor. Anything she could get her hands on that could be even remotely helpful.

She slipped through the gate when she entered. Apparently no one was home. But of course that's why she had her Uzi in her hands as she snooped around.

Clark would kill her if he knew where she was. Both Clarks would.

She could hear it now:

"It's too dangerous."

And then more "Blah" from there. She rolled her eyes as she peeped around the corner and to no surprise it was incredibly dark.

"And I didn't bring a flashlight. Great."

"Lois?"

She turned swiftly at the shock of hearing another voice, her gun ready to fire in her hands. "Clark! Don't sneak up on me like that."

He walked forward. "Well maybe I wouldn't have to if you hadn't run off like that. Tell me where you are going next time so I can help you."

"Listen! I can take care- help me? You have to be 2017 right?"

"Is that a new nickname?"

"Maybe. If I like it. Why are you here?"

"I was looking for you. Seems you disappeared without a word."

"Sorry. I knew if I told him where I was he would freak. So I just kept it to myself."

"So you two already had the nightmare talk?"

"Yeah. Don't forget the doggy style part." She said as she turned away from him to continue snooping.

"How could I?" He asked in a sexy tone.

She continued forward but her walk faltered. "Don't tell me you lose your modesty!"

"Some of it. But don't worry, I'm still the same old Clark you know."

"And that would be wrong Mr. I-Bleed-Honesty."

He walked towards her. "Tell me then Lois. How much did I change?"

"Well you don't seem to brood anymore, which of course is a good thing. You grew an inch or two. You are more shy now, which is just weird, because bantering doesn't flow like it should anymore. And it seems you lose your touch with me." She whispered the last part as she was lost in thought.

"Super hearing Lois."

She rolled her eyes. "Should I say 'crap' now?"

She turned and he ran into her, accidentally knocking them both down.

"Sorry." He whispered.

"Yeah. You can get off of me anytime now."

"Yeah." He stood and extended his hand to help her up.

She stood without his help. "I can see that you still get butterflies and so does she. So what gives?"

"If I can't tell myself, why should I be able to tell you?"

She stepped forward. "Because it's eating you alive that you can't tell me. I know it is."

"It may be but I can't ruin the future-"

"Because we are both happy right? Already heard it Clark. Already heard it." She starred at him for a moment as if waiting for something and then turned, walking away.

"Lois." He said.

"I get it 2017, whatever."

"No you don't. Neither of you do. And you won't until you live this."

"We have to do this too?"

"Yes. And then the younger versions of you and so on."

"Great. More fun. I get to ruin more lives."

"Ruin? Lois you are going to help so many people. You have no idea."

"But of course you do. Could we not talk about this?" She grabbed something and fell.

"Lois?"

"What the hell is this goop? Holy SHIT!" She jumped back. "That's Lex." She whispered.

He walked forward and touched it. "No. That goop comes from it."

"A bad clone?"

"What?"

"There were thousands of incubators in here. I tend to remember something so vivid."

"Makes sense." He continued to stare at the mass as it melted and something clicked in his mind. "That's wasn't Lex that day Lois." He stood and turned to her.

"What day?"

"Um…the day we almost had sex on the couch."

"That's why he melted." She stopped and thought for a second. "X-ray the room."

"Why?"

She rolled her eyes. "Just do it."

He sighed and went over the room. His mouth dropped slightly as he saw the room lined with lead. He started walking forward and stopped at the door. He felt along the wall, mesmerized by it. He pushed in and it crumpled, falling limply to the floor.

Lois quickly passed him up walking in. She looked the place over with a manner of disgust.

It was the same as he remembered, as he ran his hand along the wall. The same disgusting smell, the same sick bleeding white color.

"Clark?" She whispered to him.

"Hm?" He stopped.

She walked over to him putting a hand on his broad shoulder. "You ok? We can leave if you want."

"No. I need closure. I have to let this place go." He touched his blood that was stained to the wall. "I never lost hope that you would find me Lois."

"I know you didn't."

"You remember in that dream where I told you where I was?"

"Yes. I was so scarred and relieved."

He chuckled sadly. "I remember when Lana showed me her baby and said it was mine. I remember thinking of you in that very second and wishing it was our baby not mine and hers. But I still told Lana I would love that baby no matter what happened. And I did. Even after figuring out it wasn't mine. I cried when it died, that's why she put it in here. To let me say to goodbye. I never did."

He turned away from the wall and walked to a part of the floor and stopped. He kneeled down and raked his hand across a part of the floor.

"It took me a while to realize she had never gotten a semen sample."

She put her hand on the wall and touched the blood. The blood she remembers so well as it bleed from him. "You speak as though she tried."

"She did. But once she almost got me to that point she saw the pain and anger on my face. She didn't have the heart to finish."

"I wanted to kill her." Lois said suddenly as her fists clenched into balls.

He stood and faced her. "I know you did. I am so proud of you for not killing her. No one deserves it Lois, no matter what they have done to others."

She put her hand on his face. "Make me understand why someone would want to hurt a good man like you."

"Jealousy, fear, loathing. There's a lot of things Lo."

She smiled. "Why do you call me that?"

"I had to get even with the nicknames. Lo just turned out to be one that stuck."

They starred into each others eyes. "I'm not ready for a love like this."

"Neither is he."

"What happens?"

He starred at her for a moment. "God, I wish I could tell you."

She stepped closer to him. "Then do it. Tell me that I don't end up unhappy."

"You're not unhappy Lois."

She looked deep into his eyes. "Tell me you always have loved me."

He turned away from her touch. "Lois. Don't."

"Tell me that you don't love me right now."

His head snapped back up to meet her eyes. He backed away from her. "It's not you that I love." He whispered.

Her hand was stilled in the air until the shock wore off. "Do you love her? Me in 10 years time?"

"I can't do this. Lois, please, stop."

"Answer the question."

"Stop."

"How much would it change?"

"It would change everything Lois. You have no idea what one simple thing can change." He backed even farther away from her. "Do you know how much like Lana you sound right now?"

"It's called being insecure Clark."

"It doesn't suit you Lois."

She turned away from him. She shook her head and swiftly turned back, anger written across her face.

"I've changes! I'm not that person you know now."

"I know you're not. But that doesn't give you reason to act this way."

She opened her mouth and then closed it, words evade her mind.

"Quit pushing him away Lois. Those nightmares are worst case scenarios. They're not something to believe."

"I don't want him to die because of me."

"Don't push him away. It'll only make things worse."

She met his eyes. "Ok."

He starred at her for another second and scoffed. "Ok? Is that it? After all of this?"

"WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?" She screamed.

He slapped a hand across her mouth and super sped them out. He ran then into Clark's room where he set unsettled on the bed.

"Fix this." He whispered before blurring out of the room and shutting the door.

She watched him for an eternity and all the while he didn't move. The silence was killing her. She stepped forward and bit her lip. She extended a shaky hand to touch him, possibly to ease his woes.

"Clark I'm-"

He sighed. "You know what Lois?" He said in a bitter tone. She jumped in her skin. "The entire time you were gone I thought about what you said." He stood and looked at her. "You're right. I have to work harder, even if it means spending less time with you. You need to be able to do what you need to do. No matter how much I don't want to, I know I can't stop you from pursuing what your heart desires most."

Even in this darkness she could see the red and puffiness of his eyes. She felt so bad. How could she break his heart like this? How could she break her own heart like this?

"And what if what my heart desires the most is you?"

She saw his eyes search hers. He let out a sigh and put a hand on her face.

"Lois…"

"You don't believe me."

"How am I supposed to believe you? You keep pulling away from me!"

"I'm afraid." She whispered ashamed.

"Why? What are you so afraid of?" He whispered calmly.

"I'm not ready for where we are going. I'm afraid we'll get hurt."

"Where are we going?"

"I can't imagine life without you anymore Clark. I feel dependent on you now."

"I can't imagine life without you either. We need each other Lois."

"I'm not ready for that."

He smiled. "That's why we are dating Lois. To get ready. Together."

"So we're dating now Smallville?"

"Well. I won't tell anyone if you won't."

"Right."

He hugged her close and watched as the door cracked open to a wondering pair of eyes. "Thank you." He mouthed and he saw a smile before the door closed again.

"Everything's going to be ok."

-

Martha walked out to her car and got in, starting the ignition and releasing the emergency brake. She checked her mirrors then swore she saw something move. She turned and looked. Nothing there. She shrugged it off and pressed the gas when the rope wrapped around her throat. She was out in a matter of seconds as the gag was added to her mouth. She couldn't scream or breathe.

No one could help her.

And as if mother nature knew, in that very moment, the rain suddenly began to fall.


	26. Hero: Family

Chapter 26: Hero- Family

He came back in soaking wet, the dirt on his hands now mud as he stumbled up to her.

"She's gone. They took her."

She placed a sullen hand on her chest and took a deep breath before speaking. "Do you know where she is?"

His head dropped as he spoke. "We never found her." He whispered.

Lois nodded her head numbly and sat down on the couch. She looked to the other soaking wet figure on her right. His face was red from anger.

The older Clark spoke once again. "I found her car. There was blood all in it. The windshield was broken from where it had been crashed into a tree not too far from here."

She wasn't surprised to see no reaction from either one of them.

Clark stood and walked to the window, looking out at the crumpled car, listening at the hard pitter-patter of the rain. The heavens cried for him. He could see her purse in the back seat where she always put it. The leather of the seat worn in where she sat in the same place every time she drove.

He could see her smiling through the window. Her hand came up and pressed to the window, inviting him to do the same with a small, loving smiled.

He starred at the offered hand for a second then looked into her ghostly eyes. As soon as he pulled his shaky hand up and pressed it to hers, he felt the guilt pull at his gut, knocking the wind out of him.

The strain was evident on his face as he fought the tears he knew would come. He kept reminding himself that he has to be strong. He has to conquer this fear of losing everything.

Lois put a hand on his shoulder and leaned into him. She watched as the rain wouldn't relent to this sorrow.

"No forgiveness." He whispered. He turned and faced his older half who was watching him intently. His lips tucked in between his teeth as he thought about his next words.

"Where's the kryptonite?"

He looked at him sternly as he tried to remember the reason. The memories quickly clicked into place and he was gone for merely a second before returning with that familiar lead box in his hands.

"This will end your training with me. As soon as you can handle the pain, I have to leave."

Clark nodded and took the box. "You might as well go now. Lois can help me with this."

The older man looked at her then shook his head. "She can't-"

There was a knock at the door. "CK? You home?"

They turned and looked at the older version. He simply ushered them on.

Lois went to the door and opened it to a more than drenched Jimmy. He had a box in his hands as he stepped in.

"Hey Jimmy. You got something for me?" Lois asked eagerly.

He smiled at her. "Yep. Right here." He threw a confused looked over at the older Clark who simply waved at him. "You think we can go somewhere private?"

Clark about stepped in when Lois cut him off. "Yeah sure. I know of a place. Let's go." She grabbed her keys and turned back to Clark who was starring at her questioningly.

She walked up to him and grabbed his hands. "I have to take care of this on my own. Please…please…don't get all protective on me." She begged him with her eyes.

He simply smiled and leaned down and kissed her. "I trust you Lois."

She turned and walked out the door. "Love you Smallville."

"Love you too."

-

She paced around the room with the letter in her hand. She reread it carefully two times before grabbing a highlighter and running it across the paper. She looked up at a curious Jimmy.

"Is this enough to get her released?"

"It should be. I mean what else could?"

"Let's hope you're right. Thanks Jimmy."

He started to walk out the door when he stopped.

"Oh…and about your house…"

"Yeah?"

"It wasn't Oliver who did it."

She looked up from the paper intrigued.

"It was Lana." He said, the smile now evaporated from his face.

-

He had heard it from miles away and dropped his plate. The food bounced on the floor only once with a residual thud. The fork popped in his mouth fell soundless onto the table. His mouth was left agape as he listened to her heartbeat.

It was normal and calm. Now it beat with the intensity of drums, the play on them hard as if in heavy use.

When he searched the house for his older half, he found that he was no where to be found. He couldn't find his heart beat or his voice in the radius of which he could hear.

Where did he go without word or sound?

"Clark."

He heard the whisper and he tried to follow it. It was the sound of the older hims voice. He had to admit that it was odd to follow his own voice.

"I know you can hear me."

He didn't know what to do. "Yeah?" He whispered cautiously.

"Follow my voice until you find me. There's something that you have to see."

"Ok."

Clark followed his voice for 3 miles until he reached the edge of some woods.

"Stop. When I say so enter the woods." A few seconds later he heard his go ahead and entered, his breath stripped from him once again as the woods opened up before him.

Pictures of him and his father hung freely from trees, pictures of Lois and him side by side.

Candles set in random places were already lit, illuminating the sewing kits, the blankets and a box carefully wrapped with a letter on top.

He approached the box carefully, squatting down beside it to get a better look when he saw his name inscribed on the envelope. His mothers hand writing, smeared with tear drops.

_Cl_**ark.**

He paused before opening it, almost fearing as to what it would say.

But what would his mother say to him now that she was gone?

He had to know. He grabbed the envelope and opened it carefully, with shaking hands, revealing the light blue paper pressed upon with black ink.

_What can I say to a man that is so much more than I ever thought he would be? I've thought about this for so long and now the time has come._

_I am so proud of you Clark. So proud of you for becoming my son again. So proud of you for stealing Lois' heart and making her see what an amazing woman she truly is._

_So proud of you for being so much like your father. I know he's just as proud of you as I am, maybe even more._

_When you first came back to me, us, I was more than ready to lose my life for you. That's why I was shot. I thought I was ready._

_For those 2 years I waited for someone to find a clue that you were at that mansion._

_I am sorry for never saying anything. I knew that if I told someone, every one you care about would suffer and I also knew you would have resented me for that. More than holding in the truth._

_But do believe me when I say that on more than one occasion I thought about killing Lionel, Lex and Lana. I thought about it._

_I only wanted my son home._

_You have always been my ray of hope, even from the very second you walked into our lives. You were meant to walk into my arms, just as you were meant to walk out of them when the time was right._

_That time is now._

_Do you really believe your mother would let you fight your enemies without her help?_

_Inside the box is a gift, made from a Kryptonian fabric that Lionel created. It's mostly indestructible, and is a very breathable fabric. It's something you'll need when you take your next journey in life._

_Something that will make you into the man you will be proud of._

_Also in the box is another something that I only want you to use when you find the right moment._

_And I know you will._

_Thank you my son for bringing me so much happiness that I never thought I would have. Thank you for never killing and being so brave. Thank you for finding your way back to me and forgiving me even after my decease._

_I knew this day was close, which is why I wrote my final farewell. Never regret what has happened to me because all things happen for a reason._

_Love with everything you have, every ounce of your heart. Never lose your compassion for this race and never feel the need to lose yourself. Never forget who you are and where you were raised. Have faith in yourself._

_I have faith in you._

_I love you my son. Make me even more proud._

He withstood the tears that threatened to fall and he simply smiled.

He smiled at all the memories he had shared with her and smiled at her kind words.

All he had to do was have faith that everything would be ok and it would. It really would be.

He carefully folded the letter back into the envelope and closed it shut before turning his attention to the box. He slowly pulled apart the bow that bound the box, admiring her choice of the shiny metallic red that he loved. He laid it on the ground beside him.

He removed the top slowly, not bothering to peek under the lid. He set it aside and turned back, finding a light blue tissue paper incasing something inside.

He removed the paper and was greeted with something foreign to his touch. He lifted it from the box and looked at it.

His mouth dropped in awe as he gazed at it. It was a suit.

Not just a suit. A suit made from his mothers love.

His family crest lay rose up from the middle. The texture of the piece allowing the S to stick out even more. He ran his fingers across it, loving the feeling of this new element to him.

Then came the rest. The suit it self almost felt like suede, very soft but yet had a rubber texture about it. It was so bizarre to him but yet it felt nice. He pulled at the cape and felt the same fabric, raising a smiled to his lips. The boots at the bottom weren't that heavy but they seemed to be hard as rocks.

He didn't want to try it on yet, he wanted to wait for Lois to see it first. He folded it back up and began to stick it in the box when he noticed the small package at the bottom.

There was another note on it.

_You already know what this is and what it meant to me. Take good care of it._

He smiled and opened the box.

"My mother's engagement ring."


	27. Hero: Love

Chapter 27: Hero-Love

"Is happiness more than a word? More than any emotion or sense we have? How do you explain it or write it in words? You can't. Because I've searched through my heart, soul and mind for something to say that would describe it and I haven't found a thing. I did find one. That's you Lois. You're the definition of happiness to me. You make me feel whole when I'm in little pieces. You keep me safe and on level ground. I love you more than anything; this is a feeling more than anything I have ever experienced. I want to spend the rest of my life proving to you everything that I feel. Lois Joanne Lane, will you marry me?"

"Those are some beautiful words."

He turned to see her smiling face amongst the icy fields. Her warmth radiated to him, calling him to her. He stood and made his way over to her, enveloping her in a hug.

She laughed against him. "What's with the sudden embrace?"

He loosened his grip and smiled. "It means so much to have your approval on this mom."

"Oh Kal-el, honey. Of course I give you my grace. I know how much you love her."

"I know. It's just a different thing to hear it from you." He starred into her face for a brief moment before releasing yet another smile.

She smiled back at him just as brightly before releasing him. She took a small step back and offered him something from behind her, something he hadn't seen in so long.

He looked around her shoulder and saw that beautiful smiling face of a girl who once stole his heart, the girl he once loved enough to marry.

"Alicia?" He whispered, his breath stripped from him with surprise.

She smiled at him with that sweet innocent smile he knew her so well for and stepped forward. "Clark Kent. So you haven't forgotten me."

"How could I forget you? I'd never dream of forgetting you." He walked towards her and greeted her with the same warmth he did with his mother.

She hugged him back furiously, giggling into his shoulder slightly. "I never knew you from another planet." She whispered into his hair.

"I'm sorry I never told you." He looked at her with glistening eyes. "I'm sorry I couldn't save you Alicia, I'm so sorry that I didn't believe you."

She placed her small hand on his cheek. "It's better this way. You would have never gotten to be with Lois if I was still alive. And plus it's better up here, I don't have to hide anything from anyone."

"Yeah." He whispered before looking at her once again.

"Your mother was right, those words were beautiful."

"But?"

She sighed. "Is Lois Lane the girl to fall for a cheesy romantic or a guy who pops the question in an unordinary way?"

"What about both?" He asked with a slight wiggle of his brow.

They smiled at him and waited as he explained what he was going to do to make this special.

"You think it'll work?" He asked them nervously.

His mother smiled. "I think it's a wonderful idea honey, it's a lot like how your father proposed to me."

"Wasn't how you proposed to me, but I have to say this is a lot better. You two are going to make a wonderful married couple."

He smiled at them both as he felt the familiar tug calling him back to his resting place. "Bye, I'll see you again."

They bid him farewell with a wave and smile. Both far too beautiful for words.

He awoke with a smile, the feeling of her head on his chest just gave him an overwhelming feeling of happiness and reassurance that he's doing the right thing. They need to be in each others lives.

They needed to be happy together because he slowly realized in the times they are apart they are only whole together. They are only truly alive when in each others arms.

"What are you so happy about?" She whispered to him.

He looked down at her and stroked her hair, then lightly kissed the top of her head. "I love you Lois."

She looked up at him with a smile. "I love you too Smallville."

"Lois?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't ever stop calling me that."

"No problem."

As she drifted back off to sleep he couldn't contain the happiness in his heart as it spilled out onto his face. Simply watching her breathe gave him life. Listening to her heart beat made his blood flow.

She is the reason for his existence; it took too long for him to see that. It won't be much longer until they are one.

-

Clark Kent was a nervous wreck. It had been nearly thirty minutes since he had sent Shelby off to find her, a note tucked carefully inside his collar.

It was bright blue, she had to of seen it.

'This is Lois though.' He smiled at the thought. 'My Lois. My one and only.'

He glanced at the clock hung above the table yet again, then back at the candles that were lit across it. No food was on it quite yet, he had to wait for her to agree first.

Finally Shelby burst through the door and into his lap, pushing his nose up to Clark's and then licking him. Clark patted his head and quickly retrieved the newly written on piece of gold paper.

[i Smallville,

Who knew you'd end up being a cheesy romantic?

Of course I'll be there. Just give me some time to get ready.

Dress attire you say? Well…then it'll be an hour or two.

Love you,

Lois.

Oh. There better be chocolate. [/i

He smiled and held the paper to his heart while patting Shelby on the head.

"Good boy Shelby. Good boy."

-

He raced around the room, must have been nearly one hundred times now, making sure everything was perfect.

And of course that there was sufficient chocolate to satisfy Lois's cravings.

He straightened his tie once again and looked at his older counter part who was simply smiling.

"This will be the best night of your life." He whispered.

"Does anything bad happen?"

He smirked. "Define bad." Then he walked from the room and ran out of the house.

Clark smiled. He only hoped that one day he would have courage as that man did. He wondered how much it would take just to get him there.

The candles were lit, the food was on the table, the music was playing softly in the background and the ring was well hidden. He only awaited the one thing he had searched for all his life. He could wait one moment longer.

-

She fixed her hair twice, only in the end to decide that it should be down and curled.

She tried on 17 different dresses and finally found one that wasn't too reveling but yet very sexy. She wanted to make her man drool at the very least.

"He's going to do more than drool." She smirked at herself.

Once she had the dress picked out, the shoes came no problem, and she only had one pair that went with the dress. And that particular pair made her walk on her toes; needless to say her butt looks really good.

She checked her appearance one last time before opening the door to a candle lit room; a mixture of vanilla and home cooked food filled her nostrils making her ravenous.

She descended down the stairs in a way she had always dreamed: like a princess greeting her prince. She never imagining it would be Clark Kent at the bottom of the stares with his mouth gaping open, his eyes watching her as if she was the only thing in the world.

His scent evaded all other smells as it entered her nose, his fine cologne and his masculine musk made her quiver only slightly. The sight of the tux laden upon his rock hard body made her smile, he never looked better than when in a tux.

'Or when he's naked…and wet. Oh…wet is good.'

Because she was in her fantasy she didn't see Clark extend his hand to her until he cleared his throat. She smiled down at him graciously and accepted it, allowing him to help her the rest of the way down the steps.

"You look beautiful Lois."

She laughed. "Tell me something I don't already know Smallville." She winked at him then took her seat as he pulled out the chair for her.

"I love you Lois." He laughed then kissed her. He walked around the table and took his seat, watching her as she watched him. "Staring Lois?"

"Yep. Your ass looks amazing in those pants." She licked her lips at him.

He blushed a little before looking at her again. "Well. I do try."

"Yes you do. So can we eat now? I'm starving!"

He laughed at her. "Of course."

She grabbed a piece of chicken from the center of the table and threw it in her mouth before loading up her plate. He simply watched in awe at how amazing she is. He knew to wait till she was done gathering before grabbing something, unless he wanted to be cussed and smacked.

They ate quite peacefully, stealing glances at one another, laughing as Lois got ketchup all over her face. Miraculously nothing got on her dress.

"Hey Smallville?"

He looked up at her. "Yes?"

"I'm not wearing any underwear for future reference."

His fork dropped from his hand onto the plate and he gulped. He had no choice but to let his eyes travel down her body then back up again as she walked over to him. She cradled herself into his lap and pushed back the chair. She wrapped her arms around his neck and looked into her eyes.

"But…but" He stuttered, suddenly losing every ounce of strength he had to her gaze, her lustful gaze.

"Smallville? Yoo-hoo! You not in the mood or something? I can help with that… I can make you want me real quick…" She leaned forward and whispered in his ear. "I can get you standing the rest of the way with a few light strokes."

He felt one of her hands leave his neck and travel down his chest. He couldn't stop her.

'This isn't according to plan Clark!!! STOP!'

He grabbed her hand, making her frown. "Lo-…Lois. Not yet. I've got something planned for us." He whispered hoarsely.

"Really? Do you? Will it be fun?"

"I sure do hope so. And then we can have all the sex we want. Ok?"

She jutted out her lip. "But Smallville. Jr. wants me to play!" She brushed her hips across him and he hissed.

"Please…Lois. Just wait a little while ok? I promise I won't disappoint." He looked at her give up and smiled.

"I'm holding you to that Smallville. You better be on Red'k too, I'm going all out."

He lifted her off of him, calmed himself enough to stand then took her hand once again.

"You know. Dinner was nice. Really romantic. I don't think a guy has ever done that for me."

"Well then, I should do it for you more often."

She giggled. "Ah…Don't you love double entendres?"

"They're the best." He laughed along with her.

"So. Where to Smallville? Are we going to go to Metropolis or anything big on the Clark Kent express/airlines?"

"We're actually staying here, on the farm."

She looked at him like he was joking. "I got all dressed up for nothing!"

"Not nothing. You got dressed up for something."

"What are you doing? You trying to kill me or something? Please let me know a head of time though. I have people to call and we have to have sex again-"

He silenced her with a kiss, it was just chaste enough to make her follow his mouth and whimper. "I'm not going to kill you."

"Darn."

"Why are you so up to sex tonight?"

"Well…you look incredibly sexy in that suit and we haven't been together in what? Two, three weeks?"

"Try one week Lois."

"Yeah. It should be every night."

He laughed. "Ok. I'll hold you up to that then."

She leaned up and kissed him again. "You sure he can't have a quicky right now?"

He looked down and smiled at her. "Yes Lois I'm sure."

"Fine."

He rolled his eyes. "Tell you what. How about we hurry up to the barn, I do what I planned and then you can have your way with me."

She smiled up at him. "Really? I can tie you up and everything?"

"If you want to."

"Alright. I'll bite then, let's go."

He started walking fast but noticed her lagging behind.

"Lois?"

"You really think I can walk fast in these shoes Smallville?"

He walked over to her and threw her over his shoulder. She sighed as he started to walk off, she was bouncing with every step.

As soon as they reached the barn, he heard her breath hitch yet again. He smiled and set her down.

She slowly turned, looking around the barn as she did so taking in the sights before her.

Roses surrounded her, candles were lit in every place she looked and what made her smile the most were the boxes of chocolate laid out amongst it all.

And then she heard it in the background, tears came to her eyes. Her mom and dads song, not wedding song. It was just their favorite song.

[i I hear her voice

In my mind

I know her face by heart

Heaven and earth are moving in my soul

I dunno where to start[/i

Lois turned and looked at him as he stepped away from the player, once again extending his hand to her. He looked so serene to her.

"Smallville." She whispered breathlessly.

"May I have this dance?"

She couldn't answer. She simply took his hand and pulled herself to his chest. She smiled as his heart beat picked up.

They began to slow dance.

He held her close and she hugged him tight as they gently swayed with the words playing through the air.

[i Tell me, tell me the words to define

The way I feel about someone so fine

How do you talk to an angel?

How do you hold her close to where you are?

How do you talk to an angel?

Its like trying to catch a falling star.[/i

He looked out behind her at the biggest box that was there, x-raying it to make sure it was still in there.

He kissed the top of her head and he felt her smile.

[i At night I dream

That she is there

And I can feel her in the air

Tell me, tell me the words to define

The way I feel bout someone so fine

How do you talk to an angel?

How do you hold her close to where you are?

How do you talk to an angel?

Its like trying to catch a falling star.

How do you talk to an angel?

How do you hold her close to where you are?

How do you talk to an angel?

Its like trying to catch a falling star. [/i

She stepped back slightly then leaned up, kissing him slowly and lovingly.

"Why are you being so romantic tonight?"

He winked at her then stepped back, extending his arm pointing around the room, motioning her to check it out.

She stepped away curiously then moved to the first box of chocolate she saw. She opened it carefully and was disappointed at what she saw.

"Where's the chocolate?"

He just simply starred at her with a loving smile on his face. He motioned for her to go on.

He watched as she went to the next box and the box after each time the look of disappointment came out on her face as the boxes were empty. She finally went to the last box and tried to pick it up.

She couldn't. She turned her head and looked at him quizzically before pulling at the top. The top dropped from her hand on the floor, her hands went to her face and she simply smiled.

"Chocolate." She whispered. But something caught her eye on the top, there was a note.

She picked it up and read it.

[i Turn around. [/i

"Huh?" She turned with the note in her hand and looked at Clark. He was down on one knee. He was looking into her eyes like she was the only person that has ever existed.

"Lois Joanne Lane, I have waited for this moment every day since I realized I love you. There is nothing that I want more than to prove to you that I am yours forever more. I could never have dreamt of a love such as this and I don't know how I got you to turn your beautiful eyes my way. I thank God each day that you love me, and each day that I have you by my side. I want to show you that I am the man you have dreamt of to sweep you off your feet." He took her left hand and pulled the ring from his pocket. "Lois Joanne Lane, will you marry me?"

"YES!!!!!!!" She screamed at the top of her lungs, scarring him in the process. "I mean. Yes sir." She grinned at him as she watched him slide the ring on her finger, the diamond in the middle glistened just perfectly in the light, the golden band was perfectly reflective.

He stood and took her in his arms before giving her the most passionate kiss he could muster.

"Oh. I almost forgot. There's something else in that box."

She dove to dig through the chocolates which made him laugh. She finally found the small box at the bottom. She opened it carefully to see a DVD inside. She turned to Clark who stepped aside.

"I made this a few days ago. I hope you like it."

She put it in the player and pressed play, standing back to get a better view.

She was surprised when her father's voice came to her ears.

"Hey, how's my little Lo? She's not so little anymore huh? Clark told me that he was going to propose to you, and I couldn't think of a better man to support you or at least put up with you. I give you my blessing, so does your mother."

The screen faded to black and the song she just heard came on the screen. Her jaw went slack as she saw her mother come on the screen holding a little version of herself in her arms. Tears welled up in her eyes as she began to speak.

"One day you are going to have the greatest guy in the world Lois. He's going to make you happier than you could have ever imagined. He'll treat you right and love you with everything he has because you don't deserve any less." Her mother kissed her forehead. "My little girl. Always remember I love you though. I'm always here. I'm in your heart."

"Well Lo. I daresay you found him. I wish you two all the love in the world."

Her bottom lip began to tremor as her sister popped up on the screen.

"Hey sis. Clark stopped by and said that I had to say something or he'd kill me. Which of course I'll roll my eyes at as will you. Thanks to you and Jimmy I get out on parole in less than 2 days, which will be 3 hours when you see this. Can't wait to be a bridesmaid! Oh and don't make the dresses too sluttish. Love ya sis."

The screen faded again and when she saw nothing else pop up on the screen she turned back to Clark with her tear covered face and ran into his arms.

"I love you so much. Thank you. I had no idea my mom had said that. Wow."

"You're welcome Lo. You're welcome."

She laughed against his chest. "Hey Smallville?"

"Yes?"

"Don't ever stop calling me that."

"No problem."

"Now about you being tied down…" She waggled her eyebrows at him and grabbed his crotch. "I think now would be a good time."

"YeAh." He whimpered out.

As they ran back to the house neither noticed the candles blowing out or the lights flickering out behind them.


End file.
